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School made a big mistake with my child's safety (1 Viewer)

bostonfred

bostonfred

Footballguy
I've mentioned before that my son has special needs.  He is doing well but he's still behind age level.  He just started 5th grade today but socially is probably closer to a second or third grader.  It was his first day at a new school building, so nobody knows him, and he could have died because of it. 

I dropped him off at school this morning, then came back for parent pickup and lined up with all the other parents.  They had someone go to each car, get the student's name, and then bring the kids out as the cars came up.  The line was slow and took about 20 minutes, and when I got there, he wasn't there.  So all the teachers start looking for him, and the guy who took the names down said oh yeah he wasn't in the gym when I called him.  Wait, what?  How long did you know he wasn't there?

So now they go inside and look for him, and can't find him. They come out and ask me if he would have maybe gotten onto a school bus.  He has never taken the bus except for field trips, so I can totally see him doing that, because every time he's gotten on a bus it's dropped him off somewhere awesome. 

So they call the bus company and try to find out which bus he got on... and sure enough he got on the bus to my street.  And they let him off at the bus stop. Without anyone there.  A kid with autism on a busy road he's never walked alone on

We called the cops, had the principal calling us and talking to the bus company, and apparently they didn't let him off at the bus stop, but at our house, but he started walking.. I impress upon her the importance of the situation and ask which direction they saw him walking and she says she'll call back. 

My wife is home, and he didn't come in, and she's searching the street and yelling to him and he's nowhere to be found. I'm driving back and forth calling to him and asking anyone outside to keep an eye out.  No luck. 

Principal calls back.  Turns out the bus driver didn't let him off the bus after all, and brought him to his old elementary school instead.  Oops. Sorry about the confusion. Get there and he's sitting with his old teachers in a police car waiting for me. 

We have a meeting with the school tomorrow to discuss.  Any ideas appreciated.

 
What a horrific experience.  So happy he's safe.  I have no ideas for your meeting, but obviously would not bring him back for day 2 without a very firm understanding of and comfort level with the school's plan to address this going forward.

 
Bus dropped my daughter off when she was in 1st grade to an empty house with no parent waiting. We never got word they were ending school early.  She panicked and started walking down the street knocking on neighbors houses, one who let her in.  Never been so mad in my life. Your situation is worse. I’d want heads to roll. 

 
bostonfred said:
I've mentioned before that my son has special needs.  He is doing well but he's still behind age level.  He just started 5th grade today but socially is probably closer to a second or third grader.  It was his first day at a new school building, so nobody knows him, and he could have died because of it. 

I dropped him off at school this morning, then came back for parent pickup and lined up with all the other parents.  They had someone go to each car, get the student's name, and then bring the kids out as the cars came up.  The line was slow and took about 20 minutes, and when I got there, he wasn't there.  So all the teachers start looking for him, and the guy who took the names down said oh yeah he wasn't in the gym when I called him.  Wait, what?  How long did you know he wasn't there?

So now they go inside and look for him, and can't find him. They come out and ask me if he would have maybe gotten onto a school bus.  He has never taken the bus except for field trips, so I can totally see him doing that, because every time he's gotten on a bus it's dropped him off somewhere awesome. 

So they call the bus company and try to find out which bus he got on... and sure enough he got on the bus to my street.  And they let him off at the bus stop. Without anyone there.  A kid with autism on a busy road he's never walked alone on

We called the cops, had the principal calling us and talking to the bus company, and apparently they didn't let him off at the bus stop, but at our house, but he started walking.. I impress upon her the importance of the situation and ask which direction they saw him walking and she says she'll call back. 

My wife is home, and he didn't come in, and she's searching the street and yelling to him and he's nowhere to be found. I'm driving back and forth calling to him and asking anyone outside to keep an eye out.  No luck. 

Principal calls back.  Turns out the bus driver didn't let him off the bus after all, and brought him to his old elementary school instead.  Oops. Sorry about the confusion. Get there and he's sitting with his old teachers in a police car waiting for me. 

We have a meeting with the school tomorrow to discuss.  Any ideas appreciated.
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There's a lot of things that went wrong. A lot. And they each need to be addressed so it doesn't happen to him or any other kid again.

1) Start of school should have a clear indication of how each kid is going home. Especially for new students.

2) Calling a kid's name in the gym and not getting a response if supposed to is a hard stop. Find the kid ASAP.

3) Miscommunication of him on the bus or not on the bus. Not sure how that even happens.

4) The bus driver was the only one that did the right thing bringing him back to his old school. However, he should have radioed that in immediately so someone knew what was going on.

 
What a horrible and terrifying experience for everyone, very glad that he's safe.

Ideas for the meeting:

Accountability - how will they take accountability for what happened. How will they take accountability for his safety going forward, will there be a single person that owns making sure he gets from A -> B?

How/Why - Why/how did this happen? They knew he was special needs so how on earth did they let this occur?

Communication - Obviously communication was terrible in this situation. What structure will they put in place going forward.

 
Whoa, this is very ungood.  It doesn't even seem like this is some corner case either, though I suppose that's how they will try to defend it.  (defend not the right word but sue me)

Principal calls back.  Turns out the bus driver didn't let him off the bus after all, and brought him to his old elementary school instead.  Oops. Sorry about the confusion. Get there and he's sitting with his old teachers in a police car waiting for me. 
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What the hell is this about?  

 
go in, and i cannot stress this strongly enough, with a raging fury and anger. i'm talking gloves off, language bluer than the ocean.

if this happened to one of my kids i'd be apoplectic. 

it happened once to my special needs younger sister. similar'ish situation. we managed to find her on a city bus not far from home but she had absolutely no clue where  she was or how to get home from there.

colorful language was deployed from all angles and even if it didn't change anything that the school was doing it made me feel a lot better.

 
culdeus said:
Whoa, this is very ungood.  It doesn't even seem like this is some corner case either, though I suppose that's how they will try to defend it.  (defend not the right word but sue me)

What the hell is this about?  
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Which part, the part where someone clearly lied about him getting dropped off at the house, or the part where the bus driver at least knew enough to not drop a kid off who wasn't actually on their bus route?

 
bostonfred said:
Which part, the part where someone clearly lied about him getting dropped off at the house, or the part where the bus driver at least knew enough to not drop a kid off who wasn't actually on their bus route?
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What shuke is saying.  This part makes zero sense 

 
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culdeus said:
Whoa, this is very ungood.  It doesn't even seem like this is some corner case either, though I suppose that's how they will try to defend it.  (defend not the right word but sue me)

What the hell is this about?  
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Seems like a great bus driver. I’d assume the bus driver knew he didn’t live on that route and was probably able to get him to tell them his old school. They went there to make sure he was safe.

I think the good part is that even with the mistake of him getting on a bus he shouldn’t have, he was never actually in danger. There was a clear misstep log not having someone directing him to the right pickup spot. After that, it was a matter of getting a hold of parents. It being the first day, it’s not surprising that it took longer to get the bus driver connected to the principal. They did but it took a bit and isn’t shocking at all to me. The bus schedule, which thankfully we don’t use since my youngest is in HS with his older brother with a parking spot, is alway way behind the first week. New drivers (we have a shortage here), new kids, etc.

 
shuke said:
Sounds like most of it was typical first day chaos and misunderstandings.  But I would go ape #### about this part.  What authority does that bus driver have to take an unauthorized rider to anywhere but back to his current school?
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He’s a special needs student who never rides the bus. What do you think happened? The bus driver was probably only able to get out the old school from his son and took him there and made sure there were teachers who knew him and police. I don’t think the bus driver did anything wrong especially if the kid was potentially very upset and scared. Maybe even saying I go to the old school. Probably thinking the old school with teachers might know where he lived. I guess he could have gone back but maybe the old school was still in session and going back would have just been an empty school.

 
shuke said:
Sounds like most of it was typical first day chaos and misunderstandings.  But I would go ape #### about this part.  What authority does that bus driver have to take an unauthorized rider to anywhere but back to his current school?
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The two schools use the same busses.  So when they finish dropping kids off from the middle school, they go to the elementary school and pick up the next group of kids. 

I don't know exactly what happened but it seems likely the bus driver talked to someone on the staff and then they realized who it was and had him sit with someone he knew while they started making phone calls. My guess is that they then called the principal and/or told the on site police officer about it but nobody explained that part yet.

 
Big picture, he got on a bus that he wasn’t intended to get on after the first day of school at a new school. I can’t fault the bus driver for stopping him from getting on. 
 

the bus driver did not let him off (either intentionally or not). There was some miscommunication here (bus company said he got off, which wasn’t accurate) but it remains that he didn’t get off. They took him back to a school to be sorted out (wasn’t his new school but the old school. It sounds like the bus services both schools). 
 

it’s a lot to sort out, but I don’t see a case to get furious / angry at the administration. It does sound like they could improve on special needs students and how to help them get where they need to go, especially on the first day. Use it as an opportunity to improve I think 

 
bostonfred said:
The two schools use the same busses.  So when they finish dropping kids off from the middle school, they go to the elementary school and pick up the next group of kids. 

I don't know exactly what happened but it seems likely the bus driver talked to someone on the staff and then they realized who it was and had him sit with someone he knew while they started making phone calls. My guess is that they then called the principal and/or told the on site police officer about it but nobody explained that part yet.
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Yeah, after sitting on this a bit the bus driver maybe saw this situation as serious and wanted to get him to somewhere safe ASAP.  I wouldn't for sure rush to judge the driver here.  How the driver let your child on is another question I'd have perhaps.  

 
That sounds awful.   Glad he's safe.   Sounds like the bus driver may have done the best he could under the circumstances.   

That being said, I'd have everyone from the school superintendent to the janitors in a room agreeing to follow real protocols and explaining that if anything like this ever happens again that their great-grandkids will still be paying for the lawsuit against them after they're dead.

 
Horrific situation and I’m glad your son is ok.  Couple of thoughts:

1. It doesn’t sound like you have all the details of exactly what happened yet, so we definitely don’t.  I would first ask for a full detail of the events as they transpired.

2. Then I would ask for the policy or process for the things that happened to compare them to what took place

3. I would advise the principal that you plan to review and then let him know what if anything you would like done

4. I would not come out guns blazing until those things are done but wouldn’t fault you if you felt otherwise or do it after all of that

 
wilked said:
it’s a lot to sort out, but I don’t see a case to get furious / angry at the administration. It does sound like they could improve on special needs students and how to help them get where they need to go, especially on the first day. Use it as an opportunity to improve I think 
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I'm quite frankly shocked at this statement. It's a monumental failure of the school in caring for the needs of a special needs student. I can't begin to fathom thinking this is ok.

 
And to explain my logic further on #4 - I assume you aren’t immediately pulling him out of the school and will never send him back.  If so, then you will need to interact with these folks and they will be taking care of and educating your son going forward.  It’s best to have a good relationship with those people.  There’s always time to go scorched earth later but once you do you can’t take it back on most cases.

 
AAABatteries said:
And to explain my logic further on #4 - I assume you aren’t immediately pulling him out of the school and will never send him back.  If so, then you will need to interact with these folks and they will be taking care of and educating your son going forward.  It’s best to have a good relationship with those people.  There’s always time to go scorched earth later but once you do you can’t take it back on most cases.
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This is a very good point.

 
Assuming you intend to keep him there, 3 is really the only thing that matters. There's just no way to gain comfort with it without revisiting and emphasizing the gaps between 1 and 2.

 
Terrible. Thankfully it worked out for you but I’m sure the experience was horrifying. 

 
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Obviously a lot we don't know about the situation. If your child has special needs, I am assuming there is an IEP in place. Again, not knowing the current situation whether your child is in the general education setting or a special class plays a role as well.

As someone said in here, the biggest failure was not understanding how the student was getting home. Most 5th grade students are expected to head to the proper dismissal area. I'm sorry for what your family went through. As a current administrator, we try our very best to get everything right, but sometimes we fall short for whatever reason. Again, a lot goes into this and I'm not taking sides, but I will say schools and staff are dealing with more than people can imagine right now. You have every right to be upset and voice your frustrations. 

If you need any help or want to talk, feel free to PM me. I hope everything gets corrected for you, your son, and your family. 

 
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We had an issue a couple years ago where two kindergarteners had the same exact name and the wrong one got put on the bus. Failsafes did their job, driver figured out something was up, and the kid was brought back to school, eventually. A lot of phone/radio calls took place before they confirmed that yes, a mistake was made, but driver will follow protocol and return the hold to school is complete.

I would advise staying calm and being forgiving. First days are a mess. You’ve got kids in buildings that may be new to them, drivers who don’t know the faces to the names of the kids on their routes yet, new teachers, rosters that may have been updated at last minute, parents who change their minds and want to pick up kids from their first day, etc. It’s the biggest  ####show you can imagine. Let them tell you how mortified they are (and every school admin I’ve ever known would be highly upset and already addressing the breakdowns with the staff), tell them how disappointed you are, let them tell you how they are going to make sure that doesn’t happen again, and move on. Some of them may be terrible at curriculum, but losing a kid or giving one to somebody not authorized to pick them up is like their #1 priority.
 

Worst part of the incident to me (well, aside from putting a non-rider on the bus to begin with) is the admin seems to have panicked a bit and passed on speculation and bad info to the Fred family instead of waiting until they got in touch with the driver directly. No idea where that “dropped off and walking down the street “ stuff came from, but it didn’t help the situation at all.

Glad everybody is safe.

 
I would start pulling together a timeline of events as best you can construct them, I would probably set aside the confusion in communication and focus only on where your child was and how he got there.  I'd send this to the school and ask them to confirm this sequence for you. 

 
Wow, that's scary!......seems like there shouldve been some safety precautions in place prior to this happening.  How could they be completely oblivious to the childs needs?  I feel like where my kids go to school, something like this wouldn't happen.

 
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culdeus said:
Yeah, after sitting on this a bit the bus driver maybe saw this situation as serious and wanted to get him to somewhere safe ASAP.  I wouldn't for sure rush to judge the driver here.  How the driver let your child on is another question I'd have perhaps.  
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There’s no way the driver verifies everyone’s identity getting on the bus. If it’s anything like every school bus I’ve ever been on, kids line up, pile in. Expecting the bus driver to check everyone’s name is something I’ve never seen 

 
AAABatteries said:
Horrific situation and I’m glad your son is ok.  Couple of thoughts:

1. It doesn’t sound like you have all the details of exactly what happened yet, so we definitely don’t.  I would first ask for a full detail of the events as they transpired.

2. Then I would ask for the policy or process for the things that happened to compare them to what took place

3. I would advise the principal that you plan to review and then let him know what if anything you would like done

4. I would not come out guns blazing until those things are done but wouldn’t fault you if you felt otherwise or do it after all of that
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Bob Sacamano said:
1. What did you do?

2. What should you have done?

3. What will you be doing going forward?

4. Return to 1 as necessary.
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Bob Sacamano said:
Assuming you intend to keep him there, 3 is really the only thing that matters. There's just no way to gain comfort with it without revisiting and emphasizing the gaps between 1 and 2.
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Yeah this sounds like the grown up approach.  I hate being a grown up sometimes.  

I might use this to start a productive conversation about my kid's abilities in general because this is just one process where things can go wrong... what else do they need to know to make sure he's not slipping through the cracks of some other process.  I don't want to fight, I want them to take good care of my kid and this is an opportunity to start some conversations that they aren't always able to have until later in the year. 

 
is the new school aware of your kid's needs?  if so, someone has some serious explaining to do.  

just reading that story, made me slightly sick to my stomach.  the emotions that must have been running through you and your wife....mother ####er...

if the school was aware, there should be some scorched earth, peppered with the adult behavior above.  most importantly, what is going to be done differently going forward.

if they were unaware, remain adultish.  

 
  When my daughter was in kindergarten, they put her in an after school program thinking she was the other girl with their uncommon name.  So when the bus pulled up, she wasn't on it.  Her bus driver had no idea where she was.  I called the school, they said $##&@# 100% got on her bus.  I knew there was another girl with her name in the school, so I just drove there.  Sure enough, they figured it all out by the time I arrived and they had her.  She is in 7th now, and I still have the voicemail saved from the frantic secretary trying to figure out where she was.  

   I gave everyone a pass.  Working at a school is hard. 

  Thinking more now, my sister has downs syndrome, and it was crazy when we were 80's kids at school. She was always walking off and getting lost.  So different now. 

 
shuke said:
Sounds like most of it was typical first day chaos and misunderstandings.  But I would go ape #### about this part.  What authority does that bus driver have to take an unauthorized rider to anywhere but back to his current school?
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I think the bus driver is the good guy here. Thank God he didn't just drop him off and leave. Not sure why he didn't just bring the kid back to school but at least got him somewhere safe with people that know him.

 
jobarules said:
I think the bus driver is the good guy here. Thank God he didn't just drop him off and leave. Not sure why he didn't just bring the kid back to school but at least got him somewhere safe with people that know him.
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His next run was probably elementary.

 
stbugs said:
He’s a special needs student who never rides the bus. What do you think happened? The bus driver was probably only able to get out the old school from his son and took him there and made sure there were teachers who knew him and police. I don’t think the bus driver did anything wrong especially if the kid was potentially very upset and scared. Maybe even saying I go to the old school. Probably thinking the old school with teachers might know where he lived. I guess he could have gone back but maybe the old school was still in session and going back would have just been an empty school.
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You don't think the bus driver knew what school he/she picked up all the kids from?  

 
shuke said:
Now I'm confused.  
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Our district does that. Bus will pick up all the high school kids and take them all home, then swing by the middle school and pick up all those kids and take them home. One less driver and one less bus to pay for.

 
Glad he is safe!!

I am not sure what I would do, but i would start with where is the accountability and there likely wouldn't be any paint left on the walls when I finished letting everyone have it for the insane level of incompetence. 

 
GroveDiesel said:
Our district does that. Bus will pick up all the high school kids and take them all home, then swing by the middle school and pick up all those kids and take them home. One less driver and one less bus to pay for.
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I get that part.  What I don't get is the driver, who just picked up 60 kids from school A and had one left, decided to go to school B, rather than back to school A.  

Looks like we don't have all the information.  

 
bostonfred said:
So all the teachers start looking for him, and the guy who took the names down said oh yeah he wasn't in the gym when I called him. 
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This is the key.  What the actual F are they doing a roll call if it doesn't matter?  This is where I'd drop the hammer.

The bus driver kept your kid safe.  They are a star.

 
shuke said:
What I don't get is the driver, who just picked up 60 kids from school A and had one left, decided to go to school B, rather than back to school A.  
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I suspect that whoever said that the child identified the old school as the one he had come from is correct.  It would be the one they are familiar with.  As long as he got somewhere safe, I'd be okay with that part.

 
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That is terrifying.  How are you and Mrs BF holding up?  How is your son doing after this ordeal?  

Sorry GB.  Whole lotta stress and worry added on to a plate of life already full.  Hang in there, friend. 

 
I have heard other stories (not where bostonfred is located) where kids were missing and ended up still being on a bus. Some stories I think involved the kid getting assigned to the wrong bus number and obviously, the bus driver screwing up. Horrible. 

Hope this all comes to some sort of satisfactory resolution for you, fred.

 
holy crap, that sounds terrifying! I'm glad it had a somewhat good ending - at least not a bad one. Hopefully you can work with them to develop some procedures so nothing like this ever happens again - either to you/your family or anyone else that may follow in your footsteps. 

 
a in every class for the next four years and you dont pay taxes ever again take that to the bank brohan 

 
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