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Empty Nesters - (1 Viewer)

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Footballguy
So, my twins are seniors this year and will be going away to college (hopefully somewhere close).  One of my kids is getting offers from everywhere (humble brag) for his grades (takes after mom).  My other kid is getting some JUCO baseball looks and has stated, "If I am offered a scholarship to a school I like I will go, but I am not going to a school I don't like."  So to me that sounds like he is 50/50 at best.  Hoping that both kids attend in state. Wife doesn't seem to bothered by the fact the twins will be leaving the house in less than a year.  Me well I talked tough ever since they were little, "I can't wait till your old enough to move out!"  Kidding of course.    It has been hitting me pretty hard.  I feel like we have lost a year due to Covid with the kids school being out more than in. Also, I had COVID pretty bad back in December/January.  I have lost friends and really close friend just yesterday (roommate in College).   I see pictures of my twins on facebook that pop up from years ago and it hits pretty hard right in the feels.  I have been a father for so long and my life has revolved around the twins (Sports, School, Travel Ball, Practice, Lessons, Kumon) that I honestly don't know what I am going to do with all this free time that will happen sooner rather than later.  

1. Was there anything you wished you would have done your child's last year of school?

2.  Did you and spouse go through the "Empty Nest Syndrome"

3.  This sucks. 

 
Luckily I'm not an empty-nestah just yet.  But my youngest goes to UC Santa Cruz in a couple weeks.  For me...  I am moving from Boston area to Denver tomorrow.  But I have my 21 year-old son and my 19 year-old daughter moving with me.  Neither one of those two were college material.  I'm hoping they each find a trade school to their liking in Denver.  My son is an auto mechanic....  he worked at Sullivan Tire for the past year.  So he needs to find something in auto mechanics.  My daughter is into cosmetology and it looks like she'll be attending Paul Mitchell the School in Denver.  once those two are working steadily, they'll each be moving on.  Until then, I'm enjoying the ride.  

 
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i have no kids, but from all the commercials i see, you don’t have a life without your kids and you essentially have to wait till they have kids so you can move a block away from them to have meaning again.  hth

 
Luckily I'm not an empty-nestah just yet.  But my youngest goes to UC Santa Cruz in a couple weeks.  For me...  I am moving from Boston area to Denver tomorrow.  But I have my 21 year-old son and my 19 year-old daughter moving with me.  Neither one of those two were college material.  I'm hoping they each find a trade school to their liking in Denver.  My son is an auto mechanic....  he worked at Sullivan Tire for the past year.  So he needs to find something in auto mechanics.  My daughter is into cosmetology and it looks like she'll be attending Paul Mitchell the School in Denver.  once those two are working steadily, they'll each be moving on.  Until then, I'm enjoying the ride.  
Appreciate all the links so I didn't have to google those places myself.    

 
Two of my four have graduated HS and one has moved out - the other is a freshman in college.  Over the last year I, for the first time, have started looking forward to the empty nest.  I’m sure when the last one moves out I’ll be sad and a mess for a few days but I’m mentally prepared for that next chapter of our lives.

 
Both of my kids are in college, and my wife and I absolutely love it.  It was more of adjustment for her than it was for me, but everything about our life is just better with the house to ourselves.  We also legitimately enjoy it when one of our kids comes home to visit -- they grew up into little adults now that they've lived independently a bit. 

It's actually going to be weird if/when our daughter comes home this summer.

 
i have no kids, but from all the commercials i see, you don’t have a life without your kids and you essentially have to wait till they have kids so you can move a block away from them to have meaning again.  hth
I can't wait until my 12 yr old gives me grandkids lmao

 
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So, my twins are seniors this year and will be going away to college (hopefully somewhere close).  One of my kids is getting offers from everywhere (humble brag) for his grades (takes after mom).  My other kid is getting some JUCO baseball looks and has stated, "If I am offered a scholarship to a school I like I will go, but I am not going to a school I don't like."  So to me that sounds like he is 50/50 at best.  Hoping that both kids attend in state. Wife doesn't seem to bothered by the fact the twins will be leaving the house in less than a year.  Me well I talked tough ever since they were little, "I can't wait till your old enough to move out!"  Kidding of course.    It has been hitting me pretty hard.  I feel like we have lost a year due to Covid with the kids school being out more than in. Also, I had COVID pretty bad back in December/January.  I have lost friends and really close friend just yesterday (roommate in College).   I see pictures of my twins on facebook that pop up from years ago and it hits pretty hard right in the feels.  I have been a father for so long and my life has revolved around the twins (Sports, School, Travel Ball, Practice, Lessons, Kumon) that I honestly don't know what I am going to do with all this free time that will happen sooner rather than later.  

1. Was there anything you wished you would have done your child's last year of school?

2.  Did you and spouse go through the "Empty Nest Syndrome"

3.  This sucks. 
See this thread...............and be happy that you have a wife to go through it with.  Good luck, stay busy and sane. 

My oldest had an idea for me: www.middleagesinglebaseballdads.com

https://forums.footballguys.com/topic/799747-sad-day-oldest-leaves-the-nest-today-why-do-we-start-cleaning-the-house-after-hes-left/?tab=comments#comment-23562083

 
We have been ENesters for about three years.  Three kids.  The one thing I will suggest to adjusting to no more kids at home is to find something for you and your spouse to do together.  We have separate hobbies, but needed to find something in common.  During the kid years that thing is their activities.  When that is over, it hits hard.  

 
We have been ENesters for about three years.  Three kids.  The one thing I will suggest to adjusting to no more kids at home is to find something for you and your spouse to do together.  We have separate hobbies, but needed to find something in common.  During the kid years that thing is their activities.  When that is over, it hits hard.  
Oldest is now away at college, youngest will be there in 3 years, so we've started thinking about this. We're considering taking up golf - neither of us had played real golf before, and we both think we'd enjoy it.  There are a couple of courses near us that aren't too expensive, figured we could take some lessons to get up to speed.

 
We have been ENesters for about three years.  Three kids.  The one thing I will suggest to adjusting to no more kids at home is to find something for you and your spouse to do together.  We have separate hobbies, but needed to find something in common.  During the kid years that thing is their activities.  When that is over, it hits hard.  
Sex

 
We have been ENesters for about three years.  Three kids.  The one thing I will suggest to adjusting to no more kids at home is to find something for you and your spouse to do together.  We have separate hobbies, but needed to find something in common.  During the kid years that thing is their activities.  When that is over, it hits hard.  
Good point.  My wife and I are both homebodies, but we've starting doing a lot more non-kid-related stuff together and it's been great for our marriage.  Not that our marriage was bad before or anything, just that it was (obviously) kid-centered with not a lot of time left over for the two of us.

 
Good point.  My wife and I are both homebodies, but we've starting doing a lot more non-kid-related stuff together and it's been great for our marriage.  Not that our marriage was bad before or anything, just that it was (obviously) kid-centered with not a lot of time left over for the two of us.
Looking for suggestions for this.  We moved our youngest to college last week, so we are entering this stage.  Not loving it so far.

We started golfing last summer with COVID, and this being one of the few things we could partake in as a family.  But, this only occupies a small part of a weekend (she can't golf 18), and doesn't help us once it turns colder.

I can only play so many card/board games.

 
Bull Dozier said:
Looking for suggestions for this.  We moved our youngest to college last week, so we are entering this stage.  Not loving it so far.

We started golfing last summer with COVID, and this being one of the few things we could partake in as a family.  But, this only occupies a small part of a weekend (she can't golf 18), and doesn't help us once it turns colder.

I can only play so many card/board games.


Join a bowling league.  We did that a couple years ago and it's been great.  We even went to a huge tournament in Vegas (handicap based) that had about 4000 bowlers and I ended up winning some cash.  It was awesome.  

 
IvanKaramazov said:
Good point.  My wife and I are both homebodies, but we've starting doing a lot more non-kid-related stuff together and it's been great for our marriage.  Not that our marriage was bad before or anything, just that it was (obviously) kid-centered with not a lot of time left over for the two of us.
We’ve throughly enjoyed the empty nest.  A challenge, though, is: What do you talk about?  My wife and I never had the kind of relationship where we talked about anything and everything, so that part of the adjustment was kind of tough.  It’s like rekindling your friendship.  But it’s an interesting new chapter.  To a degree, though, she does her thing and I do mine.

The carrot: some years down the road can result in grandchildren and that’s the absolute best.

 
Count me an another one who is thoroughly enjoying the empty nest.  One thing I did make a point to do that others have touched on is that I drastically cut back on my video gaming hobby and replaced it with stuff that I can do with my wife.  For us that is traveling, dining out, cooking, binging television/movies.  And of course more sexy time (not joking!).  🤩

 
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Count me an another one who is thoroughly enjoying the empty nest.  One thing I did make a point to do that others have touched on is that I drastically cut back on my video gaming hobby and replaced it with stuff that I can do with my wife.  For us that is traveling, dining out, cooking, binging television/movies.  And of course more sexy time (not joking!).  🤩
What’s fun with domestic travel is to drive the state roads, not the interstates.  You see SO much interesting stuff as you cruise through Americana.  I highly recommend it.

 
What’s fun with domestic travel is to drive the state roads, not the interstates.  You see SO much interesting stuff as you cruise through Americana.  I highly recommend it.
It almost seems silly to say this, but it takes a little self discipline to do.   Its so much more rewarding especially if you're traveling with someone that you want to make some memories with.   We're so wired to get from point A to point B as fast and efficiently as possible.   Just take your time and enjoy the ride.   If one of you sees somewhere interesting, just stop and check it out for 15 minutes.   Those moments sometimes wind up being in the highlights of my trip.   

 
Man, I feel this. My daughter heads off to college next week and that leaves my HS Junior son. He is a runner and I just live for all of the meets, it is a social event with friends and he and I talk about running all of the time. When he goes it is going to leave a huge hole. It is great reading all of the posts about how it will work out fine, but sitting in this spot right now it is hard to believe.

 
I'm kind of looking forward to the empty nest thing for now.  Minus having to spend more time with wife ;)    My daughter is a junior this year.

This is the first year I'm not coaching her softball so that will be some adjustments

 
I have a daughter just starting freshman year in HS, so a few years away, but I'm legit concerned for my mental health when my son leaves for college next year.  My happiness is way too dependent on stuff I either do with him or watch him do. 

 
Been an empty nester for a few years now. All 3 of our kids came back home for awhile after college. Saved money, traveled, started careers etc. But now all gone. 2 grandkids which is the best. 2nd wedding in October, 3rd one just getting engaged. All of that is exciting. 
I was worried about what would happen with me and Mrs Smails post empty nest. So much of her identity was as a Mom. That hasn’t changed. We’re now excited about travel - just got back from Hawaii. We are looking forward to the next chapter. Our kids will always be a big part of our lives. Just not living in our house. Still see Sunday dinners etc in our future. Can’t wait till grandkids activities start. Tball games - will be awesome!

 

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