I think it is a little bit of both. I think the aunt and uncle are a little racist, but at the same time I have seen the new bride totally disrespect them.
They both have made the situation way worse than it ever needed to be.
Please explain 'a little racist'.
FWIW, I never wanted to be around my 'little racist' family members before I dated a non-white girl. Your husband's cousin sounds to me like he's better off.
I may have phrased that poorly, they have their biases just like most people.
There is a difference between a KKK member and someone that doesn't like a certain race because of past experience.What I know of the situation is several times she has disrespected them. Several times they have gotten mad at her and she plays the race card. I also know the Aunt has no filter and I am sure she has said stuff that could be perceived as racist.
Things that have happened.
Aunt and Uncle just had a brand new house built, first time the daughter in law came to the new house she wore her shoes in the house and they asked her to take her shoes off and she responded with a " I don't take my shoes off in my own house I am not doing it here"
They both have ignored each other several times when the other has tried to talk to them. They will start texting on their phones, or just walk out of the room.
They live about 2.5 hours apart and there have been demands on both sides about how often they will get to see grandchildren.
When they were about to get married there was a lot of arguing about who would pay for what as well. It ended with the daughter in law saying she wouldn't take money from some racists.