Zow
Footballguy
I'm sure those of us that have played sports or done extracurriculars (e.g. music, model UN or whatever) or are parents of kids who do them know how expensive they can be and will oftentimes require some sort of fundraising to do something special like a trip or a tournament or something. In my personal experience, this is usually selling some sort of ****ty pizzas or, years ago, we'd get that catalog thing and try to sell items from there. I suppose the "classic" example of this is girl scout cookies. Recently, I've purchased a number of the fundraiser discount cards where local businesses will offer some deal for the year upon presenting the card (some of these actually work out well as there are business I frequent on there). Regardless, while probably annoying to most (especially to those without kids), there seemed to be something decently socially acceptable about hitting up friends, family, and sometimes near strangers for money because they get something in return (even though they probably would never buy the item itself or at that inflated price in the first place). I know I've bought my fair share in the several offices I've worked at in my career and have, once or twice, solicited the same. So, okay, no issue.
Recently though I got a text from a close friend and longtime softball buddy of mine with a link to a fundraiser for his kid. I've known his kid since he was a baby and, over the last couple of years, the kid has really exceled at sports and is on several premier kids' teams in the Phoenix area for baseball, football, and basketball and they travel all over for it. It's honestly pretty impressive and I'm totally happy to support him. That said, I think I'd feel the same if he were doing music, chess club, etc.
Here's the thing though: when I opened the link and was fully prepared to buy whatever random item it was to support the fundraiser, I realized there was no such item(s) and it was just a straight cash grab. My immediate reaction was to be almost offended because my friend knows I have four kids of my own, our families are probably in the same or a similar tax bracket, and it just seemed odd to me for one adult to ask another to just straight pay for his kid's stuff. I thought about it and recalled a couple times I've gotten this request over the last several years but I was just able to ignore them pretty easily (e.g. some guy I barely knew that did crossfit with me hitting me up for money for his kid's music instrument and lessons, receiving a group email about some former coworker's kid traveling somewhere for some club and needing money, etc.). Here, though, this is a good friend of mine and I feel obligated to respond at some point.
With all the above said, is this now a normal thing and I'm the ******* for thinking that the social contract here requires that in exchange for my money I get some item I probably don't even really want in return? Or, is my buddy the ******* for hitting me up to help him pay for his one of two kids when he knows I have four myself? For those of you without kids how would you react to this?
I'd do a poll here but apparently I cannot figure out the new format.
ETA: I figured out the poll.
Recently though I got a text from a close friend and longtime softball buddy of mine with a link to a fundraiser for his kid. I've known his kid since he was a baby and, over the last couple of years, the kid has really exceled at sports and is on several premier kids' teams in the Phoenix area for baseball, football, and basketball and they travel all over for it. It's honestly pretty impressive and I'm totally happy to support him. That said, I think I'd feel the same if he were doing music, chess club, etc.
Here's the thing though: when I opened the link and was fully prepared to buy whatever random item it was to support the fundraiser, I realized there was no such item(s) and it was just a straight cash grab. My immediate reaction was to be almost offended because my friend knows I have four kids of my own, our families are probably in the same or a similar tax bracket, and it just seemed odd to me for one adult to ask another to just straight pay for his kid's stuff. I thought about it and recalled a couple times I've gotten this request over the last several years but I was just able to ignore them pretty easily (e.g. some guy I barely knew that did crossfit with me hitting me up for money for his kid's music instrument and lessons, receiving a group email about some former coworker's kid traveling somewhere for some club and needing money, etc.). Here, though, this is a good friend of mine and I feel obligated to respond at some point.
With all the above said, is this now a normal thing and I'm the ******* for thinking that the social contract here requires that in exchange for my money I get some item I probably don't even really want in return? Or, is my buddy the ******* for hitting me up to help him pay for his one of two kids when he knows I have four myself? For those of you without kids how would you react to this?
I'd do a poll here but apparently I cannot figure out the new format.
ETA: I figured out the poll.