Sounds like some very romantic and memorable moments.
Been married a couple of times. TBH, I don't remember how I asked, or even if I asked.
As far as asking permission from the future in-laws. Personally I think it's weird unless you're planning to marry a minor. However, if it appears to be important to the family of your future wife, then by all means do it to promote a good relationship with everybody. I do know that I didn't ask or consult the parents. 1st wife didn't maintain a relationship with her father. Pretty sure the 2nd would have been insulted if I had asked for permission from her parents.