Ever serve time, Doc? (1 Viewer)

[Mrs. Rannous]

You guys really don't want to know what women go through.

Go on....

Are you sure? You can't unlearn this stuff.

 

[playin4beer]

You guys really don't want to know what women go through.

Go on....

Are you sure? You can't unlearn this stuff.

I'm sure...

 

[tonydead]

Not the post I needed to read before my physical next Tuesday... The first physical I've had in about 10 years... The first physical I will have had after hitting the magic 4-0 number...

My virgin ### is terrified...

I #### you not...

My doctor is a 6'6" trini dude with the BIGGEST effing hands Ive ever seen.

Not only was his jamming his finger up my ### completely humiliating, but seeing my pecker in his landing pad hands was the most degrading feeling ever.

looked like a vienna sausage hanging out on a kitchen counter. still scarred from it.

I don't know why people don't just go to women doctors. I kind of enjoy my physical each year.

 

[IC FBGCav]

I am just sitting at my desk processing payroll and this friggin thread popped in my head and now I am sitting here cringing.

 

[Poke_4_Life]

So Shiek, did you get a diagnosis or prognosis after you were physically battered?

I mean we understand you went through pain, but is there a chance the pipes will be flowing fully again? Or is this like the confirmation of the end of times?

 

[TheIronSheik]

So Shiek, did you get a diagnosis or prognosis after you were physically battered?

I mean we understand you went through pain, but is there a chance the pipes will be flowing fully again? Or is this like the confirmation of the end of times?

All good. Just need some pills to get it all flowing again.

 

[Poke_4_Life]

So Shiek, did you get a diagnosis or prognosis after you were physically battered?

I mean we understand you went through pain, but is there a chance the pipes will be flowing fully again? Or is this like the confirmation of the end of times?

All good. Just need some pills to get it all flowing again.

Good to hear. Maybe someday the torture will be worth it. Just think, in a few months you can make yellow snow in the backyard and be proud of distance.

 

[jon_mx]

I had this done a few years back to check my bladder. Doctor assured me it was routine and "no biggie". Common sense told me it was not "no biggie" but I trusted the guy with the MD after his name anyway. It took me months to feel normal again. There are some places inside the body that are just never supposed to come in contact with anything other than bodily fluids.

Yeah. I didn't scream in pain, but at one point I grimaced and clenched my teeth in pain. He said that was only the numbing fluid being applied. I knew I was in trouble. He kept saying it wouldn't hurt, but he's a dirty liar. When it was over he said something like, "See. That wasn't bad now, was it?", like he was hoping for a nice Yelp! review.

You should have asked how much for a happy ending?

 

[Rustoleum]

good times! i once had a slim device rammed down my pee hole to collect a sample. think straightened out paper clip that one cleans their bong with, or one of the dentists torturous picks. no real warning or numbing solution...blood should never come out of there.

Sure you didn't walk into the Planned Parenthood offices by mistake?

 

[Papa Georgio]

Did it move?

 

[Papa Georgio]

Doc put me on some of those pills a few years back. Problems is most of those pills lower your blood pressure. I kept getting really light headed, especially when I would stand up quickly.

Now I cuss every little 12 year old when I am at a public restroom and it sounds like a firehose in a paper cup when they go. I am over at my stall leaning forward hoping my stream clears the front of my pants.

 

[Parrothead]

hope you at least got a bottle of wine from him.. 1st date and all..

 

[Da Guru]

Not the post I needed to read before my physical next Tuesday... The first physical I've had in about 10 years... The first physical I will have had after hitting the magic 4-0 number...

My virgin ### is terrified...

I #### you not...

My doctor is a 6'6" trini dude with the BIGGEST effing hands Ive ever seen.

Not only was his jamming his finger up my ### completely humiliating, but seeing my pecker in his landing pad hands was the most degrading feeling ever.

looked like a vienna sausage hanging out on a kitchen counter. still scarred from it.

I don't know why people don't just go to women doctors. I kind of enjoy my physical each year.

I go to a female doctor who is in her late 30s and somewhat attractive...Last time I saw her I had an 8am appointment. I had taken a Viagra the night before not thinking about my visit. Well at 8am I am talking to her and when a young female assistant starting taking my blood pressure I felt some movement. Then I see here putting the gloves on and she says to drop my pants. With the V still in my system I was not hard but had some good blood flow going a nice semi-chubb. I dropped them with pride and felt like putting my hands behind my neck. Another good thing my blood pressure was low!!

 

[EYLive]

Why do they need to poke your front and your back?

 

[Rustoleum]

Why do they need to poke your front and your back?

He's got full coverage.

 

[MikeIke]

I had a medical scare when I was 14 and went through everything you described. You think it's bad as an adult? I had no idea what was coming when he said he needed to check my prostate. Didn't even know what that was. Then there was some procedure involving radioactive dye and a catheter. I think they broke something in there, because I've dripped pee ever since.

If I wasn't out of likes already, you'd get them all, Sheik. Very well written post, would read again. A+++++++++++++++

 

[NorvilleBarnes]

This is why I don't go to the doctor. I'm certain I will die of some simple to detect #### and people will say "How did he die of THAT? It's easily detectable."

 

[Bob Sacamano]

This is why I don't go to the doctor. I'm certain I will die of some simple to detect #### and people will say "How did he die of THAT? It's easily detectable."

I just let Wet Dream tell me if everything seems OK.

 

[elguapo07]

Isn't there a children's book about an elephant named Babar?

 

[Ned]

Doc put me on some of those pills a few years back. Problems is most of those pills lower your blood pressure. I kept getting really light headed, especially when I would stand up quickly.

Now I cuss every little 12 year old when I am at a public restroom and it sounds like a firehose in a paper cup when they go. I am over at my stall leaning forward hoping my stream clears the front of my pants.

Why in the hell are you paying attention to other's streams in a public bathroom? And 12yr olds??

 

[TheIronSheik]

Doc put me on some of those pills a few years back. Problems is most of those pills lower your blood pressure. I kept getting really light headed, especially when I would stand up quickly.

Now I cuss every little 12 year old when I am at a public restroom and it sounds like a firehose in a paper cup when they go. I am over at my stall leaning forward hoping my stream clears the front of my pants.

Why in the hell are you paying attention to other's streams in a public bathroom? And 12yr olds??

When your pee dribbles out so slowly it gravity actually pulls it back towards your pants, you tend to notice when others sound like they are drilling through porcelain with a water drill.

 

[JNox3]

How's your pecker today Sheik?

 

[BroncoFreak_2K3]

I forgot to mention that he said "Don't be alarmed if you see some blood in your urine today or tomorrow. That's normal." When I got home, I pissed and it looked like Wagner Power Painter Plus spray painting my toilet bowl fire engine red.

They gave me a drug that says its main use is to cure anthrax. I'm not sure if I really needed that or if it was just a Jew seeing an Arab and being extra cautious.

 

[TheIronSheik]

How's your pecker today Sheik?

Traumatized.

 

[Johnny Rock]

Glad I finally read this thread. Excellent writing. Laughing out loud at lunch.

 

[Cold Dead Hands]

Between a hernia surgery, vasectomy, and a yeast infection caused by antibiotics, and the follow-up allergic reaction to the medication, my junk had been in the hands of too many medical professionals to count. Both male and female (I have no idea of their gender identification, some dressed like men, others like women, so I assumed their leanings). At first it was nerve wracking. By the end it was just two or more professionals in the room, one or more medical and one exhibitional.

 

[DA RAIDERS]

Between a hernia surgery, vasectomy, and a yeast infection caused by antibiotics, and the follow-up allergic reaction to the medication, my junk had been in the hands of too many medical professionals to count. Both male and female (I have no idea of their gender identification, some dressed like men, others like women, so I assumed their leanings). At first it was nerve wracking. By the end it was just two or more professionals in the room, one or more medical and one exhibitional.

the posters name makes this post pretty great

 

[Mrs. Rannous]

I forgot to mention that he said "Don't be alarmed if you see some blood in your urine today or tomorrow. That's normal." When I got home, I pissed and it looked like Wagner Power Painter Plus spray painting my toilet bowl fire engine red.

They gave me a drug that says its main use is to cure anthrax. I'm not sure if I really needed that or if it was just a Jew seeing an Arab and being extra cautious.

Does that mean he prescribed Cipro?

You should try peeing out a kidney stone. Mr R has passed a couple that were over a centimeter long. Passing the blood clots that happen with that isn't great either.

 

[Mr.Pack]

Last time I had this done, the nurse told me not to worry, my Doc has the slimmest fingers of all the Doctors.

 

[BustedKnuckles]

a year once

 

[ClownCausedChaos2]

I wanted to make a joke after reading the first part, but then I read the second part. I've had the camera-up-the-pee-hole experience. It was one of the most painful things I have ever gone through. It wasn't the camera that I minded so much. It was the crew.

Anyway, feel better, TIS. And good luck with the 1000 degree burning sensation when you piss for the next several days.

 

[Johnny Rock]

I wanted to make a joke after reading the first part, but then I read the second part. I've had the camera-up-the-pee-hole experience. It was one of the most painful things I have ever gone through. It wasn't the camera that I minded so much. It was the crew.

Anyway, feel better, TIS. And good luck with the 1000 degree burning sensation when you piss for the next several days.

What changes do I need to make in my life to ensure I never have to experience the CUTPHE?

 

[ClownCausedChaos2]

I wanted to make a joke after reading the first part, but then I read the second part. I've had the camera-up-the-pee-hole experience. It was one of the most painful things I have ever gone through. It wasn't the camera that I minded so much. It was the crew.

Anyway, feel better, TIS. And good luck with the 1000 degree burning sensation when you piss for the next several days.

What changes do I need to make in my life to ensure I never have to experience the CUTPHE?

Avoid shots to the kidney.

My personal experience: I woke up one morning in my high school days and suddenly had crimson-red urine. Went to the doctor's and had a battery of tests done. They wanted to get a better look of what was going on up there, so the scheduled a CUTPHE. Turned out to be the severest of the severe urinary tract infection. So, you're gonna wanna avoid those.