Funniest thing you've seen on a resume (1 Viewer)

[Cjw_55106]

I've seen two that sort of qualify...

1) Rainbow Word Art. A girl submitted an otherwise normal resume with her name in rainbow word art in huge 30+ point font at the top.

2) A guy worked at Circuit City. He was applying for a job at my stores. The only computer he had access to was the POS computer at Circuit City. The only printer they had hooked up to the CC POS computers was a receipt printer. Yes...he printed a 2 foot long resume on receipt paper.

 

[Cjw_55106]

I worked at a small family owned bakery and the owner's son and I would read through the resumes. We were looking for a donut fryer and for his experience, the guy states " I learned to cook for over 300 people while in prison".

We moved on.

 

[SacramentoBob]

Can't think of a resume funny, but I recall 2 "interview" incidents... One was for IT Network Support. We asked the guy what his favorite part about working in IT. He told us that he REALLY, REALLY loved running network cables. We tried to reword the question a bit thinking he may have gotten confused, but no... He REALLY, REALLY loved running network cables.

As someone who HATES running network cables, this guy would be an instant hire for me.

 

[AhrnCityPahnder]

While I don't have any resume stories, I do have a business card story. Some guy I kind of knew in grad school once handed me his "business" card. This card didn't list a business, though. Instead, it simply read: Brent DeBord: Poet, Visionary, Thinker. There was no schtick. He was dead serious. I wanted to kick him in the gut and give him a Stoine Cold Stunner on the spot.

You need to prepare for this next time. Get some business cards made up that say

Al O'Pecia​

Soiler​

​

​

Then hand him one and while he takes a minute to process what that means, you pee on his leg.

 

[top dog]

Can't think of a resume funny, but I recall 2 "interview" incidents... One was for IT Network Support. We asked the guy what his favorite part about working in IT. He told us that he REALLY, REALLY loved running network cables. We tried to reword the question a bit thinking he may have gotten confused, but no... He REALLY, REALLY loved running network cables.

As someone who HATES running network cables, this guy would be an instant hire for me.

NO ONE likes running network cables (except this guy)

 

[Annyong]

I worked at a small family owned bakery and the owner's son and I would read through the resumes. We were looking for a donut fryer and for his experience, the guy states " I learned to cook for over 300 people while in prison".

We moved on.

If a guy can't get a job frying donuts because he's been to prison, what's left for him to do?

 

[Annyong]

We hired a bunch of guys out of prison. My favorite was a guy named "Spider" who carved shanks out of scrap wood during his down time. He got fired when he parked a truck on top of a concrete barricade. The vodka in his water bottle didn't help his case much.

 

[Leroy Hoard]

A guy was applying for a labor position and his wife came into the office and filled out his application for him. He's been here 5 years now.

His wife must be hot.

 

[Kenny Blankenship]

I interned for a minor league hockey team in college and they were an expansion team so they were looking for a play by play guy for radio and tv. We recieved a ton of resumes but the best one was done on torn out notebook paper and written in pencil. Under this guys qualifications he wrote that he was an experienced play by play guy by practicing while watching games on tv.

 

[Annyong]

A guy was applying for a labor position and his wife came into the office and filled out his application for him. He's been here 5 years now.

His wife must be hot.

Negative, but we desperately needed a guy. And he was there.

 

[The Big Guy]

I've seen two that sort of qualify...

1) Rainbow Word Art. A girl submitted an otherwise normal resume with her name in rainbow word art in huge 30+ point font at the top.

2) A guy worked at Circuit City. He was applying for a job at my stores. The only computer he had access to was the POS computer at Circuit City. The only printer they had hooked up to the CC POS computers was a receipt printer. Yes...he printed a 2 foot long resume on receipt paper.

Former circuit city manager here and I have no clue how that would have been possible to do. Our POS was locked system that did not have normal computing capabilities and the part that is over the top. ...FFS it is circuit city, there are 30 computers and printers on display that all work.

 

[Rayderr]

Back during my video production days, had a guy claim he created a commercial that I made.

And not necessarily funny on the resume front:

We had hired an audio guy at the production house, guy worked 2 days and then never ever bothered to return to work. Never heard from, he never called, never returned phonecalls. He didn't even get paid because he never submitted all of his paperwork. About a month later, we had a management position open up and the guy actually sent in a resume to apply for that position.

 

[Fat Nick]

I've seen two that sort of qualify...

1) Rainbow Word Art. A girl submitted an otherwise normal resume with her name in rainbow word art in huge 30+ point font at the top.

2) A guy worked at Circuit City. He was applying for a job at my stores. The only computer he had access to was the POS computer at Circuit City. The only printer they had hooked up to the CC POS computers was a receipt printer. Yes...he printed a 2 foot long resume on receipt paper.

Former circuit city manager here and I have no clue how that would have been possible to do. Our POS was locked system that did not have normal computing capabilities and the part that is over the top. ...FFS it is circuit city, there are 30 computers and printers on display that all work.

First, Sorry for your loss. I used to love that store. Things went down hill once they took emplyees off commissions. Nobody cared.

I have no clue re POS. I certainly know you'd know better than I would. I just know that the guy came in to "drop off his resume," and I looked at him with a very confused look. He said that he worked at CC, and that was the only printer he had access to. I didn't even interview the guy, so I never got more info. I just know that I have a file folder somewhere that has a 2 foot long resume printed on receipt paper. Good point re. there being computers + printers there...although my guess is he wasn't the sharpest tool in the shed.

 

[CletiusMaximus]

I had an applicant several years ago who put glitter in the envelope with the resume and cover letter. It was all over my desk. This was a third year law student applying for a highly-coveted federal judicial clerkship.

 

[Guest]

I've seen two that sort of qualify...

1) Rainbow Word Art. A girl submitted an otherwise normal resume with her name in rainbow word art in huge 30+ point font at the top.

2) A guy worked at Circuit City. He was applying for a job at my stores. The only computer he had access to was the POS computer at Circuit City. The only printer they had hooked up to the CC POS computers was a receipt printer. Yes...he printed a 2 foot long resume on receipt paper.

Former circuit city manager here and I have no clue how that would have been possible to do. Our POS was locked system that did not have normal computing capabilities and the part that is over the top. ...FFS it is circuit city, there are 30 computers and printers on display that all work.

First, Sorry for your loss. I used to love that store. Things went down hill once they took emplyees off commissions. Nobody cared.

I have no clue re POS. I certainly know you'd know better than I would. I just know that the guy came in to "drop off his resume," and I looked at him with a very confused look. He said that he worked at CC, and that was the only printer he had access to. I didn't even interview the guy, so I never got more info. I just know that I have a file folder somewhere that has a 2 foot long resume printed on receipt paper. Good point re. there being computers + printers there...although my guess is he wasn't the sharpest tool in the shed.

Or a genius. At least his resume got noticed.

 

[Fennis]

Expert in MFM

 

[CletiusMaximus]

I had an applicant several years ago who put glitter in the envelope with the resume and cover letter. It was all over my desk. This was a third year law student applying for a highly-coveted federal judicial clerkship.

Same job, a guy just showed up at our courtroom chambers one day claiming he was just passing through town and decided to stop by to introduce himself. His resume was in my "no" pile. Within a few minutes I was certain his story was a lie and he had flown in (to Milwaukee) from NYC just to try to meet with the judge. He ended up actually meeting the judge and spent about 10 minutes meeting with us. Two days later, we received 4 thank you letters - one each to the judge, me, the docket clerk and the secretary. Desperate stuff like, "it was very interesting speaking with you about X." The funny thing was that the docket clerk was out that day, so the letter to him began, "I'm sorry I didn't get a chance to meet you, but ..."

 

[Long Ball Larry]

I had an applicant several years ago who put glitter in the envelope with the resume and cover letter. It was all over my desk. This was a third year law student applying for a highly-coveted federal judicial clerkship.

I think that you are confusing your life with the movie Legally Blonde.

 

[Rayderr]

Way back in the mid-90's, at the TV station I worked at, someone had printed their resume on red paper so that it would stand out. Great, except for when they tried to photocopy it for the people who do the interviews. The copies came out as a sheet of black.

They did hire him but ended up firing him a few months alter as it turned out that he was in fact the stupidest person ever.

 

[Osaurus]

Work in a technical field and technical questions are a huge part of all interviews. Nothing more rewarding to me than hearing keyboard clicks from the person you are interviewing on the phone. Look at me, I can google!

 

[iamsmilin]

I had an applicant several years ago who put glitter in the envelope with the resume and cover letter. It was all over my desk. This was a third year law student applying for a highly-coveted federal judicial clerkship.

Was her name Elle Woods and was the resume scented?

 

[Sarnoff]

Back during my video production days, had a guy claim he created a commercial that I made.

Similar thing, one movie I was working the producer got a resume for a job in the wardrobe department, listed on her credits was the last movie the producer worked on. Called her up and said "Who the hell are you? I never hired you."

Woman said she was just starting out in the industry and had no credits, but a friend of hers who had worked on the movie in question told her to list it on her resume anyway and that the friend would tell people she worked on it when she didn't.

"Oh, OK, I'm never hiring either of you then."

 

[George Jefferson Airplane]

I've seen two that sort of qualify...

1) Rainbow Word Art. A girl submitted an otherwise normal resume with her name in rainbow word art in huge 30+ point font at the top.

2) A guy worked at Circuit City. He was applying for a job at my stores. The only computer he had access to was the POS computer at Circuit City. The only printer they had hooked up to the CC POS computers was a receipt printer. Yes...he printed a 2 foot long resume on receipt paper.

 

[Doug B]

And listed a bunch of sports/exercise things in activities "Gym exercising: bench press 315 lbs, single arm curl 65 lbs, leg press 350 lbs" and "Golfing: Championship tees avg 110"

You get a resume from Tiger Woods in the last week or so?

 

[Doug B]

I've seen two that sort of qualify...

1) Rainbow Word Art. A girl submitted an otherwise normal resume with her name in rainbow word art in huge 30+ point font at the top.

2) A guy worked at Circuit City. He was applying for a job at my stores. The only computer he had access to was the POS computer at Circuit City. The only printer they had hooked up to the CC POS computers was a receipt printer. Yes...he printed a 2 foot long resume on receipt paper.

Well #2 is actually quite impressive and shows improvisation and problem solving.

A resume printed from a receipt printer would've impressed me.

 

[AhrnCityPahnder]

I had an applicant several years ago who put glitter in the envelope with the resume and cover letter. It was all over my desk. This was a third year law student applying for a highly-coveted federal judicial clerkship.

Rip Taylor, Esq. "Patent Lawyer with Looks"

 

[Maik Jeaunz]

Expert in MFM

with a huge shvanz.

 

[comfortably numb]

I've seen some with crazy names like Juan Gonzalez or Maria Rodriguez. Those go right in the trash.

This is why i spell my name with an S instead of a Z