how to end a dysfunctional situation? (1 Viewer)

[Socrates11]

she claimed that I sided with her husband on their most recent nuclear argument (I didn't, I told him "dude, you can't do that, you just need to walk away") and she claimed that I said she could never stay at our house if they have an argument, only he could.

Has she ever stayed at your house after an argument? Because that seems like the kind of thing that should be discouraged...

never. She called a few weeks back after one of their horrible, terrible, no good arguments and asked my wife if she could bring her and her 5 kids over. My wife said no, we don't have the room (we don't, we have 4 kids of our own). She's still mad at my wife for that answer weeks later.

Props to your wife on that. Your S-i-L sounds like the kind of nut that once she gets in your house she ain't leavin.

 

[Fennis]

Sounds like my SIL.

I believe she has BPD. Sadly, I cant have them part of my life it is too unhealthy for everyone. I hope one day my SIL gets the help she needs.

Yup. See www.bpdfamily.com on how to cope with family members afflicted by this mental illness.

thanks for the link. it was useful for me to read.

 

[Yankee23Fan]

This is one of those situations that you ignore and tell your wife that you are ignoring her but this is her one get out of jail free card. The next time she says or does anything similar towards you or your family you are going to go out of your way to lay into her in front of everyone at the next family gathering and call her what she really is and what everyone knows she is.

 

[Ditkaless Wonders]

Drop by unannounced when the husband is out. Look her deeply in her eyes, tell her you have been thinking of her all day, you just can't get her out of your mind. Then drop trou and take a humongous dump in her foyer or entryway while singing Sweet Caroline. Leave without word, comment, or explanation. From that point forward deny everything and just opine that she is one sick woman in need of professional help. Tell your wife that it is obvious SIL cannot come over and you will henceforth avoid all events where she is in attendance as you do not wish to feed her delusions.

 

[T Bell]

Drop by unannounced when the husband is out. Look her deeply in her eyes, tell her you have been thinking of her all day, you just can't get her out of your mind. Then drop trou and take a humongous dump in her foyer or entryway while singing Sweet Caroline. Leave without word, comment, or explanation. From that point forward deny everything and just opine that she is one sick woman in need of professional help. Tell your wife that it is obvious SIL cannot come over and you will henceforth avoid all events where she is in attendance as you do not wish to feed her delusions.

This. Extra points if you can coordinate turd dropping with the DA-DA-DA! in Sweet Caroline.