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So hungover this morning I accidently wore two different shoes (2 Viewers)

I'm trying to catch up

His story kind of reminds me of my nephew.
I think that's fair.  He's also quite talented and is probably one back surgery away from feeling very differently about life (or it doesn't work and it gets worse, but that's lumbar surgery for you.)

 
ehat does back surgery cost?
Depends.  Also, who's paying for it?

For example, I have clients who work as longshoremen under the LHWCA.  Some of them have pre-existing back injuries - big problems or small.  Most of them sensibly disclose those injuries before working there, because you're still eligible for comp as long as you disclose it, and there are records floating around that would prove it pre-existed. 

Anyway, invariably they hurt themselves.  And the employer (or second injury fund) is responsible for paying lifetime medical benefits for the injury, plus 2/3 of their average weekly wage until the day they die.  

When the employer/carrier/fund pays for it, it's comparatively cheap for them to get someone a 2-level lumbar fusion, for instance ($25-50k depending on a lot of factors). Paying cash out of pocket, off the schedules, would be around $80k for even a minimally invasive arthroscopic lumbar disk repair/discectomy.

 
Not to ramble about my business, and I know it's not all that germane to your issue, but I always tell them I wish they'd documented better after the injury - make sure a report gets filled out, write down what happened somewhere, let people you work with know what happened so there are witnesses who can say you got hurt, go to a doctor immediately (they have the right to choose their own, but usually only once) etc. 

 
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I posted because you don't seem like an angry young man to me.....just a little lost

I've caught up, and still..........dude

I don't have the answers you're looking for, but I'm willing to offer this one piece of advice.

BELIEVE IN YOURSELF, you can do amazing things.   

You can do this.

God bless.

 
I posted because you don't seem like an angry young man to me.....just a little lost

I've caught up, and still..........dude

I don't have the answers you're looking for, but I'm willing to offer this one piece of advice.

BELIEVE IN YOURSELF, you can do amazing things.   

You can do this.

God bless.
I'm pretty angry brochacho

 
Well thats a start.

Look, you've been dealt a #### hand, but it's up to you to make it better(only you have the power, and you do)
Sometimes I feel that way but the socioeconomic aspects don't exactly play in to "being confident and making it happen"

 
Lately I was thinking of having a family one day, then I started drinking more while going over the various scenarios in my head, then I drank even more and did coke and finally told my lady the truth about my past. The stuff I told you guys here first.

Then I went back to realizing it's too risky for me to have children . I got over it again. Now my lady went on a trip to England when I finally told her everything. I asked her to marry me again this morning and she just said yes like 30 seconds ago.

 
Lately I was thinking of having a family one day, then I started drinking more while going over the various scenarios in my head, then I drank even more and did coke and finally told my lady the truth about my past. The stuff I told you guys here first.

Then I went back to realizing it's too risky for me to have children . I got over it again. Now my lady went on a trip to England when I finally told her everything. I asked her to marry me again this morning and she just said yes like 30 seconds ago.
Congratulations.  Don't rush that - prepare yourself and your life for it first.  It could be good motivation to begin right action and habits. Right action is the middle step to virtue, I hear.  So Aristotle said.  

 
Couple days ago I told her the details of my childhood.

This morning I told her, somewhat paraphrasing....." I'm messed up but I've always loved you and I've always tried to be better for you. Often I'm a good boy and I make far less mistakes when I have you in my life. You can either have a guy that has his #### together, marries you but probably doesn't really care about you or a damaged guy that loves you and tries every day to be better.

You have stuck by me over two years so it's obvious you don't want the former. So will you just marry me"?

She said " you are right. Yes I will marry you"

 
Congratulations.  Don't rush that - prepare yourself and your life for it first.  It could be good motivation to begin right action and habits. Right action is the middle step to virtue, I hear.  So Aristotle said.  
I've been asking her for almost 2 years. I still have to get my divorce completed. Couldn't rush it if I tried.

 
What the hell does that mean?
Nevermind understand.

i was really horny for the single mom. Super horny. We exchanged a few dirty videos and I was diddling myself for a couple weeks to her video. Once I got her in my bed and smelled the stank I soldiered on just to get it over with and after that my hard on was deader than disco.

 
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Couple days ago I told her the details of my childhood.

This morning I told her, somewhat paraphrasing....." I'm messed up but I've always loved you and I've always tried to be better for you. Often I'm a good boy and I make far less mistakes when I have you in my life. You can either have a guy that has his #### together, marries you but probably doesn't really care about you or a damaged guy that loves you and tries every day to be better.

You have stuck by me over two years so it's obvious you don't want the former. So will you just marry me"?

She said " you are right. Yes I will marry you"
Well that's romantic. I like the idea of telling her that no guy who isn't a complete mess would love her, and so she's left with this Hobson's choice. 

 
Well that's romantic. I like the idea of telling her that no guy who isn't a complete mess would love her, and so she's left with this Hobson's choice. 
If you weren't a complete tool you would have been able to understand the real meaning.

I know this is a waste of time but I'll explain. We've been on again/off again for a while and every time we both date we come back to eachother because nobody else measures up to either of us. Especially the common superficial guy.....the kind of guy you are.

Not something I would expect a shallow frat boy to understand.

 
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If you weren't a complete tool you would have been able to understand the real meaning.

I know this is a waste of time but I'll explain. We've been on again/off again for a while and every time we both date we come back to eachother because nobody else measures up to either of us. Especially the common superficial guy.....the kind of guy you are.

Not something I would expect a shallow frat boy to understand.
U mad bro?

 
Nevermind understand.

i was really horny for the single mom. Super horny. We exchanged a few dirty videos and I was diddling myself for a couple weeks to her video. Once I got her in my bed and smelled the stank I soldiered on just to get it over with and after that my hard on was deader than disco.
So after you wanked off to her a few times, you felt you were in love and wanted to marry her and raise her kid.  But then reality hit and she had a bit of a stank, so she did not measure up to your idea of true love.  

Now you went back to a girl which you are apparently the only person on earth who could truly love and you ask her to marry you.  And if somebody finds something weird in all this and points out that you life is a mess (which you admit everyday), they are subhuman trash?  

 
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Well that's romantic. I like the idea of telling her that no guy who isn't a complete mess would love her, and so she's left with this Hobson's choice. 
Yep

Bonus points if Eddie Vedder's better man was playing in the background.

 
So after you wanked off to her a few times, you felt you were in love and wanted to marry her and raise her kid.  But then reality hit and she had a bit of a stank, so she did not measure up to your idea of true love.  

Now you went back to a girl which you are apparently the only person on earth who could truly love and you ask her to marry you.  And if somebody finds something weird in all this and points out that you life is a mess (which you admit everyday), they are subhuman trash?  
Yes, but, "You won't believe what happens next!"

 
So after you wanked off to her a few times, you felt you were in love and wanted to marry her and raise her kid.  But then reality hit and she had a bit of a stank, so she did not measure up to your idea of true love.  

Now you went back to a girl which you are apparently the only person on earth who could truly love and you ask her to marry you.  And if somebody finds something weird in all this and points out that you life is a mess (which you admit everyday), they are subhuman trash?  
Precisely.

 
In all seriousness allow me to clarify. I was not putting her down nor is anything wrong with her that she couldn't attract a regular guy that isn't a mess. She understood what I meant because she dated regular men and found them shallow and uninteresting, as did I when I dated other women, and we always came back to eachother. We both feel the same way about society and people.

It wasn't an insult and she didn't take it that way. We had that conversation several times in our relationship and because we both have weird standards and quirks we often come to the conclusion that we belong together because nobody else makes either of us happy.

We balance eachother very well.

 
Henry, the reason that is true is you have class.
I really don't.  I just enjoy having sex, and speaking ill of someone who has sex with you is pretty much a neon sign that says "don't have sex with me."

There is a promise in shared sweat.  If it isn't "I won't treat you like you're worthless" I don't know what it is. 

 
In all seriousness allow me to clarify. I was not putting her down nor is anything wrong with her that she couldn't attract a regular guy that isn't a mess. She understood what I meant because she dated regular men and found them shallow and uninteresting, as did I when I dated other women, and we always came back to eachother. We both feel the same way about society and people.

It wasn't an insult and she didn't take it that way. We had that conversation several times in our relationship and because we both have weird standards and quirks we often come to the conclusion that we belong together because nobody else makes either of us happy.

We balance eachother very well.
Why did you break up?

 
Why did you break up?
We broke up several times for various reasons. Sometimes I decided I wanted to have a family one day or we weren't getting along and fighting over something stupid. We always stayed friends and after a month or two get back together.

 

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