So hungover this morning I accidently wore two different shoes (1 Viewer)

[RokNRole]

Not so much for her.

The stains on my sheets say otherwise

 

[Van Dyman]

The stains on my sheets say otherwise

:reddot:

 

[KCitons]

The stains on my sheets say otherwise

Wait for it...

 

[Conanthecontrarian]

The stains on my sheets say otherwise

don't forget to wipe and stay off the pipe! Word.

 

[xulf]

Wait for it...

Is it pee?

 

[RokNRole]

Is it pee?

Ya know I was going to post about this.

She is a squirter , my first experience with this, and yes I think it’s mostly pee

 

[dickey moe]

cool-blooded.

Ecto-thermic.

 

[belljr]

A DJ saved my life

 

[trogg78]

Ya know I was going to post about this.

She is a squirter , my first experience with this, and yes I think it’s mostly pee

Sounds like a dealbreaker.

 

[RokNRole]

Sounds like a dealbreaker.

Why?

 

[RokNRole]

don't forget to wipe and stay off the pipe! Word.

I smoke my rocks off foil. I’m not going to buy a “novelty rose”. Gotta keep up appearances.

 

[-OZ-]

sigh. 

murder requires malice aforethought (i.e. premeditated). 

person DWI kills someone <> premeditated. 

your latest topic change has the word "murder" in it. 

murder <> negligent homicide as @Harry Manback already pointed out. 

Not to get all legalistic but many states do have something called felony murder, which does not require premeditation. And DWI can rise to a felony (usually due to repeat offenses). 

In Texas it appears that intoxicated manslaughter would be the term here, which seems to be more severe than your run of the mill negligent homicide.  Mostly because you're already commiting a crime. So I guess you're right that it wouldn't be murder for rnr, but it's still killing someone in the course of a crime and face up to 20 years in jail. 

 

[trogg78]

Why?

I guess most alcoholics are probably used to waking up in a bed covered in piss.

 

[squistion]

Wood

Wood? In an apartment? When was this apartment built? Gas logs have been standard in most apt. buildings for decades. Where do you get the wood?

 

[RokNRole]

Wood? In an apartment? When was this apartment built? Gas logs have been standard in most apt. buildings for decades. Where do you get the wood?

Trees

 

[Ditkaless Wonders]

I, for one, am pleased for you Rok.  I hope this is the first in a long line of positives for you.

 

[OrtonToOlsen]

Why do you people indulge this crap?

 

[RokNRole]

I, for one, am pleased for you Rok.  I hope this is the first in a long line of positives for you.

Thank you. I’m no longer upset with you.

 

[Conanthecontrarian]

I, for one, am pleased for you Rok.  I hope this is the first in a long line of positives for you.

why did you change back to the bunny avatar?

 

[RokNRole]

why did you change back to the bunny avatar?

It’s a softer, gentler DW

 

[Ditkaless Wonders]

why did you change back to the bunny avatar?

Because my GB Henry found it for me and it is not to be lightly abandoned.

 

[squistion]

Trees

Thanks, that confirms what I figured - that the roaring fire part of the story had been made up.

 

[Binky The Doormat]

Thanks, that confirms what I figured - that the roaring fire part of the story had been made up.

Yeah, probably just that part. 

 

[RokNRole]

Thanks, that confirms what I figured - that the roaring fire part of the story had been made up.

https://imgur.com/a/ZCPbz

 

[NotSmart]

https://imgur.com/a/ZCPbz

Do you have a chimney that is vented to the outside?    

 

[need2know]

So how big was her penis

 

[RokNRole]

Do you have a chimney that is vented to the outside?    

Oddly enough yes

 

[The Kerminator]

https://imgur.com/a/ZCPbz

Looks like 2 chickens roasting in your fireplace

 

[NotSmart]

Oddly enough yes

Bueno

 

[Conanthecontrarian]

Why do you people indulge this crap?

what do you mean "you people"? #tropicthunder

 

[Conanthecontrarian]

Because my GB Henry found it for me and it is not to be lightly abandoned.

i miss your other avatar. who is/was she?

 

[Ditkaless Wonders]

i miss your other avatar. who is/was she?

Someone who made an offer I had to refuse.

 

[Conanthecontrarian]

Someone who made an offer I had to refuse.

this sounds interesting. better than the rest of this thread, will you tell me more?

 

[RokNRole]

Looks like 2 chickens roasting in your fireplace

Some of the paint in the back just burned off.

 

[RokNRole]

So me and my army bud went out tonight with one of the bartenders. I’ve been buttering up the bartender for a while to agree to teach me. Our boss just fired a dead weight tender and they need someone. I’m getting bored of serving. I’m a peacock and they gotta let me fly.

The three of us drank 4 Long Island iced teas each and shared two pitchers. My army bud asked me to be a groomsman at his wedding and I agreed. The 3 of us are planning to pick up an 8 ball and come to my place to play Mario kart and need for speed.

We also met a cute chick outside the bar that was wasted and pulled down her underwear to show us her new thigh tattoo. We played wingman and got the tender a number since me and army guy are taken. Good times.

Tomorrow me and army guy are double dating with our girls at our restaurant. We are using our employee gift certificates. Should be a blast.

 

[The Kerminator]

Why do I get the feeling this story ends with you and your army buddy spooning in front of your fireplace?

 

[trogg78]

When is the wedding?

 

[RokNRole]

When is the wedding?

Some time after he proposes.

 

[Conanthecontrarian]

it sounds like you have everything planned out. i can't see how anything could possibly go wrong.

 

[RokNRole]

it sounds like you have everything planned out. i can't see how anything could possibly go wrong.

Your parents probably felt the same way when your mom got knocked up and that didn’t work out very well.

 

[Otis]

Your parents probably felt the same way when your mom got knocked up and that didn’t work out very well.

Oh wow burn 

 

[kentric]

I can’t think of anything more disgusting than women.

Atop their towers of lies.

And their stanky ####ies.

 

[Conanthecontrarian]

Your parents probably felt the same way when your mom got knocked up and that didn’t work out very well.

im sure your parents are very proud of you. you have accepted a job that hasn't been offered to you and you are going to be a groomsman in a wedding where a proposal has yet to be made and accepted. what parent wouldn't be bursting with pride with all you have accomplished?

 

[Conanthecontrarian]

Your parents probably felt the same way when your mom got knocked up and that didn’t work out very well.

i would ask if you kiss your mother with that mouth. but, as you have told us before, you have done much more than that.

 

[RokNRole]

im sure your parents are very proud of you. you have accepted a job that hasn't been offered to you and you are going to be a groomsman in a wedding where a proposal has yet to be made and accepted. what parent wouldn't be bursting with pride with all you have accomplished?

You are dense lol

 

[Phil Elliott]

Ya know I was going to post about this.

She is a squirter , my first experience with this, and yes I think it’s mostly pee

Are we still  trying to keep content PG?

 

[skol asylum]

Are we still  trying to keep content PG?

Pee Generously?

 

[Phil Elliott]

Pee Generously?

 not up to me to pass judgement.

 

[CurlyNight]

It's been awhile Jason. How's it going?

 

[Galileo]

When is the wedding?

Some time after he proposes.

He asked you to be a groomsman without asking his girl to marry him?  OK, just a formality, I'm sure...  Is he planning to pop the question while out on your double date to the place you work?  Is this the same guy you are setting up the marijuana business with?

Oh, I've been out of touch.  I just noticed the dates on the quotes...I guess all of this already happened.