Wife confronts me about hiring a $3,500.00 Escort (1 Viewer)

[Buddy Ball 2K3]

Wife asks me to meet her out for dinner tonight. Nothing that out of the norm, so we agree on a time and place. I arrive a little late and she is sitting at a table waiting for me. We exchange pleasantries and she proceeds to tell me that she knows I have a guys weekend coming up and there is something that has been really bothering her as of late. She tells me that she was using the tablet at home and started to search something that started with a "C" (I now forget what it was) but the first thing that comes up is some whore escort.

- Umm what?

She says "Someone was searching for an escort that charges $3,500 on the tablet. I know it wasn't me so it had to be you. So are you trying to higher her?"

- Umm... I have no idea what you are talking about. But I can assure you that if I was guying to hire an escort it wouldn't be one that cost that much.

We discuss it a bit more and I own up to it having to be something I searched for (I honestly could not remember doing it) because I know she wouldn't. I blamed it on searching for a porn star or something that I heard on Howard Stern. I could tell that she was still a bit upset but I seemed to talk her off the ledge and we had a nice enough dinner. I racked my brain trying to think what the hell I was looking for (I do not frequent escorts) but I came up zilch.

So as we are walking out to our cars she turns to me and says... CHRISTY MACK! Thats her name...

 

[captain_amazing]

Did you tip her well?

 

[Insein]

Go on...

 

[AcerFC]

At first, I was going to tell you to show her the post. Then I finished reading it and realized, probably not the best idea

 

[Raider Nation]

She should be more upset about marrying a horrible speller.

 

[BobbyLayne]

At first, I was going to tell you to show her the post. Then I finished reading it and realized, probably not the best idea

Yeah, she probably wouldn't get the whole "my wife limits how much we spend on hors each Xmas" comment was just a joke.

 

[pantherclub]

higher her?

 

[Long Ball Larry]

She should be more upset about marrying a horrible speller.

I bet she appreciates his exactitude when it comes to decimal places though.

 

[rockaction]

She should be more upset about marrying a horrible speller.

I bet she appreciates his exactitude when it comes to decimal places though.

I knew his post looked odd for some reason. Thanks.

 

[Limp Ditka]

It's Friday already?

 

[Annyong]

Christy Mack is a $3500 hooker? Is that for the whole month?

 

[5-ish Finkle]

Christy Mack is a $3500 hooker? Is that for the whole month?

Nah, just the hole(or probably plural, I guess).

 

[flapgreen]

This would be a great thread with Arizona Ron at the helm.

 

[MikeIke]

Did she at least give you a blue dot?

(the escort, not your wife. I'm not that crass)

 

[Aerial Assault]

Bring me a higher love

Woah-oh

 

[Brony]

Let's #### some whores

- Scoresman

 

[shadyridr]

Sorry

And stop copying my threads

 

[Chemical X]

Steinbrenner "higher this man!"

 

[Ignoramus]

But I can assure you that if I was guying to hire an escort it wouldn't be one that cost that much.

I'm sure this did a good job of allaying her concerns."Don't worry honey, if I were going to cheat on you, it would be with a cheap whore."

 

[jon_mx]

Christy Mack is a $3500 hooker? Is that for the whole month?

Nah, just the hole(or probably plural, I guess).

The whole hole or just the tip?

 

[Ned]

But I can assure you that if I was guying to hire an escort it wouldn't be one that cost that much.

I'm sure this did a good job of allaying her concerns."Don't worry honey, if I were going to cheat on you, it would be with a cheap whore."

 

[Sinn Fein]

So, how did she know Christy Mack was a $3500 hooker? You don't get that from the search bar imo - she must have been curious enough about Ms. Mack that she clicked on a few links. Maybe you should explore this side of her curiosity. I think she is trying to tell you something.

Bring it up with her tonight, and report back tomorrow friday.

 

[Buddy Ball 2K3]

But I can assure you that if I was guying to hire an escort it wouldn't be one that cost that much.

I'm sure this did a good job of allaying her concerns."Don't worry honey, if I were going to cheat on you, it would be with a cheap whore."

She knows I am cheap thats why I was so surprised at the accusation

 

[Buddy Ball 2K3]

So, how did she know Christy Mack was a $3500 hooker? You don't get that from the search bar imo - she must have been curious enough about Ms. Mack that she clicked on a few links. Maybe you should explore this side of her curiosity. I think she is trying to tell you something.

Bring it up with her tonight, and report back tomorrow friday.

Oh she clicked on the links, websites. She did some studying. She is now a fan of hers as well. Not a $3,500.00 per night fan though

 

[Osaurus]

It's Friday already?

Hump day silly

 

[Fat Nick]

This is why I pretty much do 95% of my browsing in Private Mode/Safe Mode/Incognito. I can't look at any site that has even a girl in a bikini without my wife thinking I'm up to something. So I go to websites like Lowes, Home Depot, and ESPN normally, but any link I click from any friend that might have secondary links to other sites I use safe mode.

Auto-complete addresses might have been the worst invention ever for those of us who are married.

 

[eoMMan]

"But honey, I was going to hire her for BOTH of us."

 

[fatness]

What's your wife's price limit for your escorts? Food Lion has them for $1.39/lb.

 

[shadyridr]

Funny thing is my first car was a Ford Escort that I paid the same price for

 

[eoMMan]

Funny thing is my first car was a Ford Escort that I paid the same price for

Haha

I've always like the rap lyric "I've got hoes with accents and I don't mean Hyundais".

 

[Fat Nick]

Funny thing is my first car was a Ford Escort that I paid the same price for

Did it have airbags?

 

[AhrnCityPahnder]

Funny thing is my first car was a Ford Escort that I paid the same price for

Did it have airbags?

And a filthy tailpipe

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

She probably can't get any higher tbh.

 

[shadyridr]

Funny thing is my first car was a Ford Escort that I paid the same price for

Did it have airbags?

I dont remember but I do know I couldn't squeeze much into the trunk

 

[Michael Brown]

This is why I pretty much do 95% of my browsing in Private Mode/Safe Mode/Incognito. I can't look at any site that has even a girl in a bikini without my wife thinking I'm up to something. So I go to websites like Lowes, Home Depot, and ESPN normally, but any link I click from any friend that might have secondary links to other sites I use safe mode.

Auto-complete addresses might have been the worst invention ever for those of us who are married.

This sounds awful

 

[Leroy Hoard]

But I can assure you that if I was guying to hire an escort it wouldn't be one that cost that much.

I'm sure this did a good job of allaying her concerns."Don't worry honey, if I were going to cheat on you, it would be with a cheap whore."

lol

 

[Rayderr]

This is why I pretty much do 95% of my browsing in Private Mode/Safe Mode/Incognito. I can't look at any site that has even a girl in a bikini without my wife thinking I'm up to something. So I go to websites like Lowes, Home Depot, and ESPN normally, but any link I click from any friend that might have secondary links to other sites I use safe mode.

Auto-complete addresses might have been the worst invention ever for those of us who are married.

This sounds awful

Seems a lot simpler to just set up multiple accounts.

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

This is why I pretty much do 95% of my browsing in Private Mode/Safe Mode/Incognito. I can't look at any site that has even a girl in a bikini without my wife thinking I'm up to something. So I go to websites like Lowes, Home Depot, and ESPN normally, but any link I click from any friend that might have secondary links to other sites I use safe mode.

Auto-complete addresses might have been the worst invention ever for those of us who are married.

This sounds awful

Seems a lot simpler to just set up multiple accounts.

Or not be married to that chick.

 

[Fat Nick]

This is why I pretty much do 95% of my browsing in Private Mode/Safe Mode/Incognito. I can't look at any site that has even a girl in a bikini without my wife thinking I'm up to something. So I go to websites like Lowes, Home Depot, and ESPN normally, but any link I click from any friend that might have secondary links to other sites I use safe mode.

Auto-complete addresses might have been the worst invention ever for those of us who are married.

This sounds awful

Seems a lot simpler to just set up multiple accounts.

Or not be married to that chick.

Don't get me wrong...she's great. She just really could've used some brothers growing up...Her view of what guys should and shouldn't do is a little off.

 

[johnnycakes]

That Christy Mack is one ugly ho, no thank you. But for you fans, you can donate to her medical expense fund here.

Christy Mack, model, pornstar, daughter, sister and sweetheart, loved by many, was viciously and brutally attacked and beaten (allegedly) by ex-boyfriend "War Machine" aka Jon Koppenhaver on Friday August 8, 2014. It's a miracle she is still alive after the injuries sustained. She is currently being hospitalized for 18 broken bones around her eyes, a broken nose in 2 places, several missing and broken teeth, a fractured rib, a ruptured liver, injured leg and swelling. You can find Christy's courageous account of the horrific assault on her Twitter page at www.twitter.com/ChristyMack

"War Machine" is currently on the run and there is a $20,000 reward being offered for any information that leads to his arrest. If you have any information regarding his whereabouts, please call Crime Stoppers at 702-385-5555 or 911. Apprehended.

ETA: Christy looks a lot better with long hair than with the shaved side of the head look. Still a double-bagger, though.

 

[GoFishTN]

Loved by many ...

 

[Chemical X]

start hiding money

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

This is why I pretty much do 95% of my browsing in Private Mode/Safe Mode/Incognito. I can't look at any site that has even a girl in a bikini without my wife thinking I'm up to something. So I go to websites like Lowes, Home Depot, and ESPN normally, but any link I click from any friend that might have secondary links to other sites I use safe mode.

Auto-complete addresses might have been the worst invention ever for those of us who are married.

This sounds awful

Seems a lot simpler to just set up multiple accounts.

Or not be married to that chick.

An error occurredYou have reached your quota of positive votes for the day

 

[(HULK)]

Wife asks me to meet her out for dinner tonight. Nothing that out of the norm, so we agree on a time and place. I arrive a little late and she is sitting at a table waiting for me. We exchange pleasantries and she proceeds to tell me that she knows I have a guys weekend coming up and there is something that has been really bothering her as of late. She tells me that she was using the tablet at home and started to search something that started with a "C" (I now forget what it was) but the first thing that comes up is some whore escort.

- Umm what?

She says "Someone was searching for an escort that charges $3,500 on the tablet. I know it wasn't me so it had to be you. So are you trying to higher her?"

- Umm... I have no idea what you are talking about. But I can assure you that if I was guying to hire an escort it wouldn't be one that cost that much.

We discuss it a bit more and I own up to it having to be something I searched for (I honestly could not remember doing it) because I know she wouldn't. I blamed it on searching for a porn star or something that I heard on Howard Stern. I could tell that she was still a bit upset but I seemed to talk her off the ledge and we had a nice enough dinner. I racked my brain trying to think what the hell I was looking for (I do not frequent escorts) but I came up zilch.

So as we are walking out to our cars she turns to me and says... CHRISTY MACK! Thats her name...

doh, my bad. Tell your wife I'm sorry.And that rate is outrageous.

 

[TenTimes]

Funny thing is my first car was a Ford Escort that I paid the same price for

Me too

Escort or escort, you're getting $3500 worth of suck either way.

 

[Aerial Assault]

What's your wife's price limit for your escorts? Food Lion has them for $1.39/lb.

A bit hire.