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Learning to Lie


munga30

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A small excerpt:

For two decades, parents have rated “honesty” as the trait they most wanted in their children. Other traits, such as confidence or good judgment, don’t even come close. On paper, the kids are getting this message. In surveys, 98 percent said that trust and honesty were essential in a personal relationship. Depending on their ages, 96 to 98 percent said lying is morally wrong.

So when do the 98 percent who think lying is wrong become the 98 percent who lie?

It starts very young. Indeed, bright kids—those who do better on other academic indicators—are able to start lying at 2 or 3. “Lying is related to intelligence,” explains Dr. Victoria Talwar, an assistant professor at Montreal’s McGill University and a leading expert on children’s lying behavior.

Although we think of truthfulness as a young child’s paramount virtue, it turns out that lying is the more advanced skill. A child who is going to lie must recognize the truth, intellectually conceive of an alternate reality, and be able to convincingly sell that new reality to someone else. Therefore, lying demands both advanced cognitive development and social skills that honesty simply doesn’t require. “It’s a developmental milestone,” Talwar has concluded.

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My two year old already lies to me. It's fairly innocent but it's concerning. I find it really hard to do anything about it since the concept of lying is too complex to explain to him and I don't feel right punishing him for doing something if he doesn't understand it.

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My two year old already lies to me. It's fairly innocent but it's concerning. I find it really hard to do anything about it since the concept of lying is too complex to explain to him and I don't feel right punishing him for doing something if he doesn't understand it.

I would imagine it to be developmentally appropriate for a 2 year old to tell lies, and I would agree they would be too young for punishment.Now, my 10 year old step daughter who apparently has become a lie machine overnight has me bothered. She doesn't even bother trying to make it believable. She also lying to her dad and step mom. I see big troubles in our future.
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