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Memo to: Matt Lienart
From: Football Gods
Date: December 17, 2006
Subject: Attacking Champ Bailey
Dear Mr Lienart, It has come to the attention of the Association of National Football League Football Gods® that you have violated the “Foot in mouth” Clause of the ANFLFG® rulebook. On Friday December 15th 2006 you were recorded as expressing the statement that you were not scared of Football God candidate Champ Bailey. You also stated your desired plan to “attack” said candidate during the televised December 17, 2006 4:05 game played in Arizona, and “challenge” him. You will be fined two game Interceptions, as well as 3 QB sacks or Fumbles depending upon the ANFLFG® governing body’s decision. You are also ordered to face public humiliation at the hands of 4 millions National Football League viewers. We duly recognize that your “tenure” in the National Football League has been short, but such a grave violation of the “Foot in Mouth” clause warrants us to take immediate action. Please refer back to Septembers NFL office memo to all NFL Quarterbacks entitled: “Your Receiver being covered by Champ Bailey is not covered.”
From: Football Gods
Date: December 17, 2006
Subject: Attacking Champ Bailey
Dear Mr Lienart, It has come to the attention of the Association of National Football League Football Gods® that you have violated the “Foot in mouth” Clause of the ANFLFG® rulebook. On Friday December 15th 2006 you were recorded as expressing the statement that you were not scared of Football God candidate Champ Bailey. You also stated your desired plan to “attack” said candidate during the televised December 17, 2006 4:05 game played in Arizona, and “challenge” him. You will be fined two game Interceptions, as well as 3 QB sacks or Fumbles depending upon the ANFLFG® governing body’s decision. You are also ordered to face public humiliation at the hands of 4 millions National Football League viewers. We duly recognize that your “tenure” in the National Football League has been short, but such a grave violation of the “Foot in Mouth” clause warrants us to take immediate action. Please refer back to Septembers NFL office memo to all NFL Quarterbacks entitled: “Your Receiver being covered by Champ Bailey is not covered.”
