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Does anyone use baby wipes on themselves? (2 Viewers)
- Thread starter ATRAIN56
- Start date
flapgreen
Footballguy
Hold on baby. Let me pull out my Pampers Sensitive wipes and clean my johnson rod off before you go to town.Odd. I'm a lay down and go to sleep type guyFor sure. I'm generally a hop in the shower type guy, but there have been few times I was too drunk and worried I might drown...no problem, baby wipe down and LOVE
Ned
Footballguy
Nothing at all, Hoss. Unless you just came inside from mowing the lawn, I don't see the point of disinfecting my crank every time before diving in.
mr. furley
Footballguy
some of us can't afford to buy that many wipes, guy
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=Smackdown=
Footballguy
You can, but you have to....1. Buy the thinner, smaller ones.2. Flush 1 or 2 only at a time.The box will still say don't flush, but you can do it!
Osaurus
Footballguy
Yeah...not those 8 1/2 x 11 ones for projectile expunging pantry bandits. Small ones from Cottonelle, Charmin, et al.
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No. 16
Footballguy
DEAR GOD NO!They work in tandem. Start with TP to get the chunks and until you see NO MORE streaks and then finish with a wipe or two until you definitely SEE NO MORE STREAKS. That way your box of wipes last longer and you cornhole can star in a pr0n.Shocked these haven't completely made TP obsolete by now.
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urbanhack
Fight The Power!
And tear them in half.
=Smackdown=
Footballguy
Did you really have to paint the picture for us?Shame you can only flush 1 at a time - if it wasn't for that plumbing problem I'd use these almost exclusively.DEAR GOD NO!They work in tandem. Start with TP to get the chunks and until you see NO MORE streaks and then finish with a wipe or two until you definitely SEE NO MORE STREAKS. That way your box of wipes last longer and you cornhole can star in a pr0n.
Ned
Footballguy
Did you really have to paint the picture for us?Shame you can only flush 1 at a time - if it wasn't for that plumbing problem I'd use these almost exclusively.DEAR GOD NO!They work in tandem. Start with TP to get the chunks and until you see NO MORE streaks and then finish with a wipe or two until you definitely SEE NO MORE STREAKS. That way your box of wipes last longer and you cornhole can star in a pr0n.
you freaks really have chunks stuck in your ### after you take a dump?
pigskinliquors
Dr. Parrothead
Charlie Frown
Footballguy
You get even more use out if you poke a hole in it and stick your finger thru. Each one lasts two or three trips.
GreatLakesMike
Footballguy
Did you really have to paint the picture for us?Shame you can only flush 1 at a time - if it wasn't for that plumbing problem I'd use these almost exclusively.DEAR GOD NO!They work in tandem. Start with TP to get the chunks and until you see NO MORE streaks and then finish with a wipe or two until you definitely SEE NO MORE STREAKS. That way your box of wipes last longer and you cornhole can star in a pr0n.
There are some major freaks in this thread.
djmich
Footballguy
Overall I agree that the use of wipes is beneficial. But once you accept that why would you insist on first smearing #### chunks all over your ### with TP, and then using a wipe to finish. Just use a wipe to start, more effective in every way.DEAR GOD NO!They work in tandem. Start with TP to get the chunks and until you see NO MORE streaks and then finish with a wipe or two until you definitely SEE NO MORE STREAKS. That way your box of wipes last longer and you cornhole can star in a pr0n.
Hipple Long Ware & Peete
Footballguy
This. I have had to use regular paper 3-4 times in the past year and it really sucked. Butt wipes are
Hipple Long Ware & Peete
Footballguy
avoids clogs. and 
to the 1/2 wet 1/2 dry process. "cutting" with rolled TP may be more economical, but there are better places to save pennies.Added benefit for those who eat a lot of spicy food, is that most of the wipes have a touch of aloe. Really takes the heat out of the day after you had 1/2 bottle of tequila and jalapeno poppers.
Hipple Long Ware & Peete
Footballguy
I am a fan of leaving the lid off/bag open so that the top 1 or 2 is semi dry. Still damp just not wet is sometimes a better way for 'tough jobs'
No. 16
Footballguy
Economics.Overall I agree that the use of wipes is beneficial. But once you accept that why would you insist on first smearing #### chunks all over your ### with TP, and then using a wipe to finish. Just use a wipe to start, more effective in every way.DEAR GOD NO!They work in tandem. Start with TP to get the chunks and until you see NO MORE streaks and then finish with a wipe or two until you definitely SEE NO MORE STREAKS. That way your box of wipes last longer and you cornhole can star in a pr0n.
footballnerd
Footballguy
I have some in the car to clean my hands when I go fishing or whatevers, but that's about it.
KarmaPolice
Footballguy
Until somebody volunteers to shave my hairy ###, this is the way to go.Did you really have to paint the picture for us?Shame you can only flush 1 at a time - if it wasn't for that plumbing problem I'd use these almost exclusively.DEAR GOD NO!They work in tandem. Start with TP to get the chunks and until you see NO MORE streaks and then finish with a wipe or two until you definitely SEE NO MORE STREAKS. That way your box of wipes last longer and you cornhole can star in a pr0n.
Kenny Powers
Footballguy
Man, Ive been out of the wipes for awhile...Gotta get some freshies!
Not sure which is better: baby wipes after a nice deuce, or blow dryer on the balls and taint after a shower
Not sure which is better: baby wipes after a nice deuce, or blow dryer on the balls and taint after a shower
flapgreen
Footballguy
Damn that's a tough one.
Kenny Powers
Footballguy
Indeed. Might be poll/thread worthy
glumpy
breeze
Bejeeebus--y'all are killing us flushing those things. Work with a septic system one time and you'll learn real quick. You don't always see the problems with city sewage but working as I do in facilities I can attest to the issues waste water treatment plants have both with substance and chemicals. It all eventually comes back to you. Those incredible triple layer won't poke your finger through TP's? Not worth a damn--they never dissolve and clog up the system. You may think you're flushing it away to become someone else's problem but it all ultimately comes back to you if only in remediation costs.
Das Boot
Footballguy
You're among friends, it's ok to admit it here.
shuke
Black Ice Skeptic
What do you guys do with all those used rubbers?
Rick James
Footballguy
what the what?
No. 16
Footballguy
Hahaha. Never shake a Filipino person's hand.I have since reformed to TP to start and moist wipes to finish. Way less hassle.
Rick James
Footballguy
No no no, I want to hear your old method. I have to know exactly what the hell you were talking about when you said "I used my hand".
No. 16
Footballguy
Filipino Tabo Method:1. Fill cup with warm water
2. Drop a deuce.
3. Wipe with TP to get chunks out.
4. Simultaneously pour warm water and scrub your ### with your free hand.
5. Dry off with TP.
6. Make lumpias to give to white coworkers that you hate.
Uwe Blab
Footballguy
Bump.
xulf
Footballguy
Did your ex know you did this?
Rick James
Footballguy
got some toothpaste on my wool suit; a few minutes with a baby wipe and PRESTO! all gone. Is there anything these beauties can't do?
Al Czervik
Not wearing pants
Butt wipes are clogging sewer systems; http://gawker.com/your-#######-butt-wipes-are-clogging-sewer-systems-1275892538
We already know that all self-respecting adults should use toilet paper, but since respect isn’t enough to stop the adult babies from choosing to wipe their ### on “pre-moistened” and “flushable” wipes, maybe this will: according to a report in The Washington Post, wipes are responsible for a 35 percent jump in jammed pumps and clogged pipes in the Washington area over the last few years.
Adult wipers have also cost the Washington Suburban Sanitary Commission more than $1 million dollars because they’ve had to “install heavy-duty grinders to shred wipes and other debris before they reach pumps on the way to the treatment plant.” On top of this, officials in the District’s water and sewer agency have spent over 500 hundred man-hours in the last year “removing stuck wipes.” And this summer, after hearing complaints that toilets wouldn’t flush in London, a 15-ton “glob of wipes and hardened cooking grease the size of a bus” was discovered in a sewer pipe.
35 percent. $1 million dollars. 500 hours. 15 tons. You know what number is a lot less scary than all of these ####### numbers? Two. The number two—and using dry paper to wipe it—is a lot less scary.
But with “flushable” wipes making up 14 percent of the $4 billion “pre-moistened” wipe market, and with sales predicted to grow annually by 6 percent for the next five years, the Federal Trade Commission is now leading an investigation into the “flushable” label. Want to know what some guy at the FTC is doing today? Oh, he’s currently calling around and asking for data from wipe manufacturers and the wastewater industry because you just can’t get over yourself and wipe like a ####### grown up.
pollardsvision
Footballguy
Finally tried it. Not a fan.
Not bad, butt not worth the fear of a finger poke through for me.
Not bad, butt not worth the fear of a finger poke through for me.
shuke
Black Ice Skeptic
How is there a higher probability of poke-through with these over toilet paper?
gianmarco
Footballguy
And why fear? I consider it lucky.
How is there a higher probability of poke-through with these over toilet paper?
pollardsvision
Footballguy
I didn't say it was a rational fear.
How is there a higher probability of poke-through with these over toilet paper?
Patrick Bateman
Footballguy
If I don't use them, I will have to go back and take care of the leftover grease. On occasion I will have to go back and wipe again regardless.
STEADYMOBBIN 22
Footballguy
And why fear? I consider it lucky.
How is there a higher probability of poke-through with these over toilet paper?
McGarnicle
Footballguy
Since adding them to the repertoire, I can't imagine going back. I'm 90% cleaner, no longer get the itching or burning afterward, and rarely get swamp ###.
I do wonder if they are going to clog up our septic system though.
I do wonder if they are going to clog up our septic system though.
