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FFA Bored Games - 9/22 SHEEP IS BAAAAAAAAAAAAACK - Reveal and podium! (4 Viewers)

Here are your first three prompts. Answer them as quickly and as cleverly as you can.

01-01. Santa's most unpopular reindeer is  ________.

01-02. Neighbors were shocked when the largest house on the block put up ___________ for Christmas.

01-03. The codeword used by the NBA front office for "load management."

 
Guess it would be helpful if I kept a running tally of what's available. Will update this post as I receive PMs. Still plenty of space today!

Responses received

01-01. 7/12
01-02. 5/12
01-03. 6/12

 
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hagmania said:
The Twelve Days of Quipmas

Note: this is Quiplash, not Sheep. You want to stand out, be funny, get votes.

Starting today, and then every following weekday at around 12:00 pm CT, I will release three (3) Quiplash prompts. The first twelve responses I get from the public will be the ONLY answers published for voting. Just like in the game, speed matters.

You may ONLY choose TWO (2) prompts to answer per day.
Click to expand...
Asking for a friend, what if you happen to answer all three?

 
dino259 said:
Asking for a friend, what if you happen to answer all three?
Click to expand...
I was going to just randomly toss one of your answers. If you'd like to prune your selection, best do that now via PM (send new, I've already deleted the old conversation).

 
Will reveal answers in the morning, which will give time for voting. Votes should be revealed tomorrow afternoon, couple of hours after Day 2's prompts are released.

 
Please send one vote for your favorite answer of each prompt, including those you didn't submit a response for. You may not vote for your own answer. Audience votes are encouraged!

01-01. Santa's most unpopular reindeer is  ________.
A    Kamala Reindeer – dropped out of the Reindeer Games
B    Pooter
C    Farty the Red Assed reindeer
D    Gassy
E    Trumper
F    reggie
G    Wolf Blitzer
H    Adolph

01-02. Neighbors were shocked when the largest house on the block put up ___________ for Christmas.
A    Goalposts
B    Stephen Miller for Secretary of HUD
C    bail money
D    their daughter as collateral for a loan for a second swimming pool
E    reggie

01-03. The codeword used by the NBA front office for "load management."
A    DHBM (DWIGHT HOWARD'S BABY MAMA'S)
B    "Posting up AC Green"
C    Slacker-it is
D    No gameday refunds
E    Lower Vagina Injury
F    Roseanne
G    No Nut November

 
Also, if you missed Day 1: fear not! Day 2 prompts will be revealed around 12 pm CT! First come, first answer, up to twelve responses will be taken.

 
Quipmas, Day 2 - choose up to two to answer:

02-01. A surprising fact about turtledoves.

02-02. Recipe that can be found in a cookbook written by maximum security prison inmates.

02-03. Give an excuse why you can't go caroling this evening.

 
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If popularity for quipping isn't so high next week either, we might enter into a Quipsma-Sheepsma-Kwaanzakah situation.

 
hagmania said:
Quipmas, Day 2 - choose up to two to answer:

02-01. A surprising fact about turtledoves.

02-02. Recipe that can be found in a cookbook written by maximum security prison inmates.

02-03. Give an excuse why you can't go caroling this evening.
Click to expand...
Answer two of these. Make your answers funny/ original.  Send them directly to hags. That's it. 

 
Last edited by a moderator:
Realized that, in fact, no I could not post answers over the weekend, seeing as I didn't have my work computer. :bag:

Please stand by for voting.

 
01-01. Santa's most unpopular reindeer is  ________.        
dino259    -    Kamala Reindeer – dropped out of the Reindeer Games    -    0
Worm    -    Pooter    -    1
Foosball God    -    Farty the Red Assed reindeer    -    2
The Iguana    -    Gassy    -    1
NotSmart    -    Trumper    -    0
Studs & Duds    -    reggie    -    2
Nick Vermeil    -    Wolf Blitzer    -    2
heckmanm    -    Adolph    -    3 

@heckmanm takes the first quip of Christmas!

01-02. Neighbors were shocked when the largest house on the block put up ___________ for Christmas.        
dino259    -    Goalposts    -    5
Bob Sacamano    -    Stephen Miller for Secretary of HUD    -    1
Nick Vermeil    -    bail money    -    1
Long Ball Larry    -    THEIR DAUGHTER AS COLLATERAL FOR A LOAN FOR A SECOND SWIMMING POOL    -    2
Studs & Duds    -    reggie    -    1

@dino259 takes #2!

01-03. The codeword used by the NBA front office for "load management."        
Long Ball Larry    -    DHBM (DWIGHT HOWARD'S BABY MAMA'S)    -    0
Bob Sacamano    -    "Posting up AC Green"    -    4
The Iguana    -    Slacker-it is    -    1
NotSmart    -    No gameday refunds    -    2
Foosball God    -    Lower Vagina Injury    -    2
Worm    -    Roseanne    -    0
heckmanm    -    No Nut November    -    2

And who else but "bored game ironman" @Bob Sacamano for #3!

 
Please send one vote for your favorite quips. Do not vote for your own. Audience votes are encouraged!

02-01. A surprising fact about turtledoves.
A    Do not have hard shells.
B    Originally called tortoisecrows
C    They don't actually make Dove's chocolate
D    Often mistaken for pigeons
E    They are not actually the love children of turtles and doves.
F    Sadly, many unsuspecting people have lost a finger to a snapping turtledove.
G    They are, in fact, 0% turtle.
H    Turtle doves are closet Metallica fans

02-02. Recipe that can be found in a cookbook written by maximum security prison inmates.
A    Solitary Confinement Crockpot Chicken
B    Cigarette ice cream
C    Festive toilet sangria
D    One Eye Open-faced Spam Sandwiches
E    Toilet Soufflé with a saffron meringue
F    Mississippi brown sauce

02-03. Give an excuse why you can't go caroling this evening
A    Waiting anxiously for the next Quipmas release to rise from the Quipmas patch.
B    Oh man, I'd love to go Caroling - but even though she's super hot, I'm a married guy!
C    Carol broke my heart in college.
D    Too busy soaking Mrs. Santa's walls.
E    I gotta get to bed. I still gotta brush my teeth, feed the hog, still got some homework to do, still got those bills to pay, wash the car…
F    Worn out from Bobbing, Tedding and Alice-ing last night
G    Already going Racheling.
H    I sing like William Hung

 
On the third day of Quipmas...

Answer UP TO TWO (extras will be discarded at random) prompts as quickly and as cleverly as you can.

03-01. Change a Christmas movie or song's title by incorporating a reference to (a) butt(s).  [Host's note: I'm twelve, okay?]
03-02. It never gets told, but this is the real reason the Inn at Bethlehem had no vacancies.
03-03. Elon Musk definitely has an irrational fear of ____________.

 
02-01. A surprising fact about turtledoves.        
Long Ball Larry    -    A    Do not have hard shells.    -    3
scoobus    -    B    Originally called tortoisecrows    -    1
dino259    -    C    They don't actually make Dove's chocolate    -    0
AAABatteries    -    D    Often mistaken for pigeons    -    0
Foosball God    -    E    They are not actually the love children of turtles and doves.    -    1
NotSmart    -    F    Sadly, many unsuspecting people have lost a finger to a snapping turtledove.    -    2
Worm    -    G    They are, in fact, 0% turtle.    -    0
ragincajun    -    H    Turtle doves are closet Metallica fans    -    2

@Long Ball Larry takes the group to school in question 1

02-02. Recipe that can be found in a cookbook written by maximum security prison inmates.        
Bob Sacamano    -    Solitary Confinement Crockpot Chicken    -    2
scoobus    -    Cigarette ice cream    -    1
heckmanm    -    Festive toilet sangria    -    3
Nick Vermeil    -    One Eye Open-faced Spam Sandwiches    -    1
ragincajun    -    Toilet Soufflé with a saffron meringue    -    2

@heckmanm's recipe really puts us in the holiday mood for question 2

02-03. Give an excuse why you can't go caroling this evening        
dino259    -    A    Waiting anxiously for the next Quipmas release to rise from the Quipmas patch.    -    2
NotSmart    -    B    Oh man, I'd love to go Caroling - but even though she's super hot, I'm a married guy!    -    1
Nick Vermeil    -    C    Carol broke my heart in college.    -    0
Worm    -    D    Too busy soaking Mrs. Santa's walls.    -    2
Long Ball Larry    -    E    I gotta get to bed. I still gotta brush my teeth, feed the hog, still got some homework to do, still got those bills to pay, wash the car…    -    1
heckmanm    -    F    Worn out from Bobbing, Tedding and Alice-ing last night    -    1
Bob Sacamano    -    G    Already going Racheling.    -    1
AAABatteries    -    H    I sing like William Hung    -    1

@dino259 and @Worm each kiss their sister after they get done with Carol on question 3. Shoutouts to AAAB: my link.

 
Please send one vote for your favorite quips. Do not vote for your own. Audience votes are encouraged!

03-01. Change a Christmas movie or song's title by incorporating a reference to (a) butt(s).  [Host's note: I'm twelve, okay?]
A    I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Butt
B    It's a Wonderful Booty
C    Fart! the Herald Tuchus Sing
D    "I Farted on Santa's Lap (Now Christmas Is Gonna Stink for Me)" by The Little Stinkers
E    Rudolf, the butt nosed reindeer
F    It Came Upon a Midnight Rear 
G    Frosty the Butt man
H    Angels We Have Heard on Heinie

03-02. It never gets told, but this is the real reason the Inn at Bethlehem had no vacancies.
A    @Ditkaless Wonders' 30th birthday party
B    Porn convention
C   ####ter's full
D    Filled with hookers bought by salesmen in town for for world famous Myrrh Convention
E    Asian Massage Parlor Convention
F    @Ray Karpis was on his robe optional trip
G    Syrian Shiners First Annual Convention was in town. Tiny chariots EVERYWHERE.
H    Philip River's family was in town for the holidays.
I    Sodomites always have the place booked for conventions.

03-03. Elon Musk definitely has an irrational fear of ____________.
A    profits
B    non-visionary hookers
C    glass

 
hagmania said:
Please send one vote for your favorite quips. Do not vote for your own. Audience votes are encouraged!

03-01. Change a Christmas movie or song's title by incorporating a reference to (a) butt(s).  [Host's note: I'm twelve, okay?]
A    I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Butt
B    It's a Wonderful Booty
C    Fart! the Herald Tuchus Sing
D    "I Farted on Santa's Lap (Now Christmas Is Gonna Stink for Me)" by The Little Stinkers
E    Rudolf, the butt nosed reindeer
F    It Came Upon a Midnight Rear 
G    Frosty the Butt man
H    Angels We Have Heard on Heinie

03-02. It never gets told, but this is the real reason the Inn at Bethlehem had no vacancies.
A    @Ditkaless Wonders' 30th birthday party
B    Porn convention
C   ####ter's full
D    Filled with hookers bought by salesmen in town for for world famous Myrrh Convention
E    Asian Massage Parlor Convention
F    @Ray Karpis was on his robe optional trip
G    Syrian Shiners First Annual Convention was in town. Tiny chariots EVERYWHERE.
H    Philip River's family was in town for the holidays.
I    Sodomites always have the place booked for conventions.

03-03. Elon Musk definitely has an irrational fear of ____________.
A    profits
B    non-visionary hookers
C    glass
Click to expand...
I thought I sent answers but don't see them here @hagmania- I sent as a reply to "Quips day 2" rather than start a new message.

 
It was a run.

But that run isn't over yet!

Rising like the Chilean miners from the depths of wageslavedom, your host hath returned to save Quipmas.

 
Last edited by a moderator:
03-01. Change a Christmas movie or song's title by incorporating a reference to (a) butt(s).  [Host's note: I'm twelve, okay?]
Worm    -    I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Butt    -    0
bryhamm    -    It's a Wonderful Booty    -    1
dino259    -    Fart! the Herald Tuchus Sing    -    2
AAABatteries    -    "I Farted on Santa's Lap (Now Christmas Is Gonna Stink for Me)" by The Little Stinkers    -    2
Nick Vermeil    -    Rudolf, the butt nosed reindeer.    -    0
Bob Sacamano    -    It Came Upon a Midnight Rear     -    4
Long Ball Larry    -    Frosty the Butt man    -    0
Rustoleum    -    Angels We Have Heard on Heinie    -    2

@Bob Sacamano toots his horn on quip 1

03-02. It never gets told, but this is the real reason the Inn at Bethlehem had no vacancies.
Bob Sacamano    -    Ditkaless Wonders' 30th birthday party    -    1
dino259    -    Ray Karpis was on his robe optional trip    -    0
AAABatteries    -   ####ter's full  -    2
Long Ball Larry    -    Filled with hookers bought by salesmen in town for for world famous Myrrh Convention    -    2
Worm    -    Asian Massage Parlor Convention    -    0
Foosball God    -    Porn convention    -    0
Rustoleum    -    Syrian Shiners First Annual Convention was in town. Tiny chariots EVERYWHERE.    -    0
Nick Vermeil    -    Philip River's family was in town for the holidays.    -    4
NotSmart    -    Sodomites always have the place booked for conventions.    -    2

Popping out the hard facts like the Rivers family does a new child, @Nick Vermeil takes quip 2

03-03. Elon Musk definitely has an irrational fear of ____________.
Foosball God    -    profits    10
NotSmart    -    non-visionary hookers    2
bryhamm    -    glass    0

@Foosball God comes perilously close to a quiplash on #3!

 
Days 4, 5 & 6: In which we "improvise"

Ok, I am tardy BY WHOLE DAYS. Woof. Time to consolidate. Day 4 & 5 will be presented today, as a part Sheep-part Quip combo. Tomorrow, I will combine Days 6 & 7. Bit of a shortcut, but I'm devoted to delivering a Merry Quipmas to all.

 
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