Willie Neslon
Footballguy
I'm on a flight last Monday evening. Three seats to a row, I'm on the aisle, middle seat is open, young woman in window seat. She has a small dog (really) in a doggie carry on bag placed at her feet. We take off and it looks like she'll be conked out for the duration. I've decided to watch The Batman. About an hour and twenty minutes into the movie I notice a slight commotion out of the corner of my eye. The young woman in the window seat has yanked the barf bag from the seat pocket in front of her and looks to be booting into it. I'm wondering if she is actually puking or just dry heaving? My nose let's me know that yes, she is actually puking. I had a sweatshirt in my lap that I now place over my nose and mouth as to smell fabric softener rather than chunks blown. Instead of going to the lav to clean up, she twists the top of the barf bag shut and places it somewhere on her side of the row. She then opens the tray table, lays her arms and head on it and tries to go back to sleep. At some point during the episode I made eye contact with her dog who had the same look on its face that I did, a look of concern and astonishment.
Trying to forget what happened I now return to The Batman, sweatshirt still gently pressed against my mouth and nose. A bit later the flight attendant comes by with drinks and snacks. I grab a ginger ale and some pretzels. The lady in the window seat does not get anything and is seemingly asleep as is the dog. Some time passes, my drink and snack are finished and The Batman has just leapt from a building and is flying through the air in his Batsuit. As he crashes to the ground I feel a tap on my shoulder. The girl in there window seat wants to get up to use the bathroom. She has her dog tucked under her right arm. As I'm standing up to let her out she releases the dog onto the middle seat and frantically rips a fresh barf bag from the middle seat pocket. She begins to barf just as the bag is open. She got most of it in the bag, some of it on the middle seatback in front of her and some sprayed onto the seat back in front of me, including a few droplets on my TV screen. I am now standing in the aisle looking down at her and also looking up and down the aisle to see if any flight attendant are around that I can flag down. About four or five rows behind me there is a woman in the opposite aisle seat who is standing and looking on with concern at what is going on in my row. She is wearing white, is kind of illuminated and looks a bit like Glenn Close in the natural when she stands for that Hobbs at bat. I look back down at the girl in my row to see how she's doing. She let the dog go from her arm when she went to grab the bag and now the dog is standing on my seat and trying to get over the armrest and into the aisle. I corral the dog as to not let him get loose. Her owner is still seemingly not done vomiting. I really didn't even know what to do other than to stand there looking at her and making sure her dog doesn't make a run for it. After a minute or so she finishes and slides back over to the window seat. I place her dog down in the middle seat and gently push him toward her. My sweatshirt was on my seat and I'm pretty sure it caught some flying vomit. I stay standing for a little bit wondering if she's going to want to get up and take those barf bags to the ladies room with her and maybe clean up a little but she does not. I sit back down in my seat. The smell is now unbearable. I cannot put my sweatshirt over my nose and mouth because of the possible puke spray contact. Robert Pattinson's face on my TV screen is spackled with little droplets of vomit. This is my Nam.
A short time later the girl wants to get up again and does so. She goes to the front of the plane to use the bathroom up there, carrying her dog in her right arm and two almost full barf bags in her left hand. I take my boarding pass and gently scrape one of the main puke drops off my TV screen so I don't have to keep looking at it. The girl returns from the bathroom. I get up to let her in and she says something to the effect of "I am sooo sorry ". I do not respond. As she settles into her seat I carefully take the barf bag out from my front seat pocket and place it on the middle seat just in case. The rest of the flight is uneventful. The third barf bag was never used. We land and I can't get off the plane fast enough. I go right to the bathroom to wash my hands and face. I look in the mirror at my clothes and my sweatshirt to see if I can spot any puke on it. I don't see anything. I continue to baggage claim and never see the girl or her dog again.
So that was three and a half nights ago. I'm sitting here now with a slight fever and moderate cramping in my upper abdomen. Very gassy. I haven't puked myself yet but definitely not feeling great. Hoping I recover soon. That was the first time outside of a movie that I've ever seen anybody actually use a barf bag on a flight. I will never forget it. Thanks for reading and letting me vent. Puking aside, I thought The Batman was pretty good.
Trying to forget what happened I now return to The Batman, sweatshirt still gently pressed against my mouth and nose. A bit later the flight attendant comes by with drinks and snacks. I grab a ginger ale and some pretzels. The lady in the window seat does not get anything and is seemingly asleep as is the dog. Some time passes, my drink and snack are finished and The Batman has just leapt from a building and is flying through the air in his Batsuit. As he crashes to the ground I feel a tap on my shoulder. The girl in there window seat wants to get up to use the bathroom. She has her dog tucked under her right arm. As I'm standing up to let her out she releases the dog onto the middle seat and frantically rips a fresh barf bag from the middle seat pocket. She begins to barf just as the bag is open. She got most of it in the bag, some of it on the middle seatback in front of her and some sprayed onto the seat back in front of me, including a few droplets on my TV screen. I am now standing in the aisle looking down at her and also looking up and down the aisle to see if any flight attendant are around that I can flag down. About four or five rows behind me there is a woman in the opposite aisle seat who is standing and looking on with concern at what is going on in my row. She is wearing white, is kind of illuminated and looks a bit like Glenn Close in the natural when she stands for that Hobbs at bat. I look back down at the girl in my row to see how she's doing. She let the dog go from her arm when she went to grab the bag and now the dog is standing on my seat and trying to get over the armrest and into the aisle. I corral the dog as to not let him get loose. Her owner is still seemingly not done vomiting. I really didn't even know what to do other than to stand there looking at her and making sure her dog doesn't make a run for it. After a minute or so she finishes and slides back over to the window seat. I place her dog down in the middle seat and gently push him toward her. My sweatshirt was on my seat and I'm pretty sure it caught some flying vomit. I stay standing for a little bit wondering if she's going to want to get up and take those barf bags to the ladies room with her and maybe clean up a little but she does not. I sit back down in my seat. The smell is now unbearable. I cannot put my sweatshirt over my nose and mouth because of the possible puke spray contact. Robert Pattinson's face on my TV screen is spackled with little droplets of vomit. This is my Nam.
A short time later the girl wants to get up again and does so. She goes to the front of the plane to use the bathroom up there, carrying her dog in her right arm and two almost full barf bags in her left hand. I take my boarding pass and gently scrape one of the main puke drops off my TV screen so I don't have to keep looking at it. The girl returns from the bathroom. I get up to let her in and she says something to the effect of "I am sooo sorry ". I do not respond. As she settles into her seat I carefully take the barf bag out from my front seat pocket and place it on the middle seat just in case. The rest of the flight is uneventful. The third barf bag was never used. We land and I can't get off the plane fast enough. I go right to the bathroom to wash my hands and face. I look in the mirror at my clothes and my sweatshirt to see if I can spot any puke on it. I don't see anything. I continue to baggage claim and never see the girl or her dog again.
So that was three and a half nights ago. I'm sitting here now with a slight fever and moderate cramping in my upper abdomen. Very gassy. I haven't puked myself yet but definitely not feeling great. Hoping I recover soon. That was the first time outside of a movie that I've ever seen anybody actually use a barf bag on a flight. I will never forget it. Thanks for reading and letting me vent. Puking aside, I thought The Batman was pretty good.
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