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Cheating Death- Your Stories (1 Viewer)

In 2001 I totaled my BMW 328i trying to make a turn at about 70mph. Launched off the curb and went between 2 big trees that were about a foot wider apart than the car. Amazing I didn't hit them. Just smashed the front from the ground and snapped the axles

 
Jesus johhnycakes, glad you are still with us bro.

I almost got murdered in the woods when I was 16. Guy tied a noose around my neck and to the back of his truck. Was just about ready to give me a Nantucket Sleighride when someone intervened and saved my life.

 
Jesus johhnycakes, glad you are still with us bro.

I almost got murdered in the woods when I was 16. Guy tied a noose around my neck and to the back of his truck. Was just about ready to give me a Nantucket Sleighride when someone intervened and saved my life.
Why did he want to do that? Seems like party of the story is missing.

 
Jesus johhnycakes, glad you are still with us bro.

I almost got murdered in the woods when I was 16. Guy tied a noose around my neck and to the back of his truck. Was just about ready to give me a Nantucket Sleighride when someone intervened and saved my life.
Why did he want to do that? Seems like party of the story is missing.
I was cutting through the woods with some friends. A couple of guys drive by in a big truck. Next thing I know a friggin lunatic is on top of me beating the snot out of me. He was yelling in Spanish, all I recognized was that he was going to kill me. He beat me unconscious, and when I woke up I was in a field with my hands tied behind my back and he was tying a rope around me neck hooked up to the back of his truck. The guy was going to kill me, no doubt. I could see it in his eyes. He went to start driving and suddenly one of my friends ran in front of the truck screaming. Then two other friends came out of the woods, and while they were arguing with the guy I got out of the ropes and ran like hell. The guy told the cops that I had thrown a rock at his truck. The cops didn't even arrest the guy despite me being a bloody mess and having rope burns around my neck. To this day I can't understand it.Oh, and the friend who ran out in front of the truck? He admitted a couple years later one night when he was drunk and in tears that he threw a rock at the guy's truck.

 
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Sitting on trunk rack feet on bumper doing 50 pissing of back of car. Friend swerved to avoid something. Forgot I was back there

 
Joe Summer said:
Riding in the back seat of the family car when I was 6 years old. My dad made a last-minute decision to turn off the road to stop at a grocery store. As soon as we turned off the road, an 18-wheeler rear-ended the car that had been in front of us, killing everyone inside.
Winner

 
I've had two and both were in canoes.

The first happened when I was 16. I was doing an Outward Bound course in northern Ontario in the middle of nowhere. We were two weeks into a canoe trip when a flash storm hit. Our guides called everyone off the water. I was actually in the water about waist deep guiding the canoe by hand. We were about 300 feet from the shore when lightning hit the water beside me. I received the shock of my life and went into shock. I don't remember much after that.

The second happened on my honeymoon which was in Southern Africa. We on the first day of a 4-day canoe safari down the Zambezi river. It was a little windy and choppy and we were canoeing across a 500 foot wide channel. Halfway across, I feel a bump and hear a splash. My wife glares at the guys behind us because she thought they bumped us but their faces were ashen and they said a hippo had surfaced and bit and missed me by a foot. I looked down at the side of my canoe and there was a chunk out of it right by me. If I'd been paddling on that side, the hippo could have taken my wrist, elbow, shoulder or worse.

 
I was maybe 12 or 13 and a bunch of my friends and I rode our bikes to this park that was pretty far away from our neighborhood. This was the late 70s or early 80s so we all had BMX bikes an nobody was wearing a helmet. On our way home we were on a main road through a residential area, it was two lanes and pretty busy. There were also drainage ditches along the side of the road that were about 8 to 10 feet below the road surface. Each driveway was at the level of the road so the ditches got shallower to meet each driveway and then gradually fell back to the 8 to 10 foot depth afterwards. A large pipe ran under each driveway so the water could flow through the ditches. It hadn't rained in a while so there was no water and all the ditches has shortly cut grass, there were no rocks, or mud or anything. These ditches looked like an extension of the manicured lawns they were next to - and they looked like a nice smooth surface that we could traverse with our BMX bikes. We try a few of the ditches and it's fun! The ditches are wide, the slopes are gradual, and we are having blast. As we gained confidence we started going faster and racing to be the first one to the next driveway. The road is now going down hill so we are really picking up speed and at this point I am at the front of the pack headed for the next driveway. I'm pedaling as fast as I can to ensure I get there first and when I get close enough to see the bottom I see two large rocks (each one about as big as love seat) instead of the pristine lawns that we experienced earlier :shock: I am so close to the edge that I have no time to use the brakes. My only hope is to slide the bike sideways and skid to an immediate stop. I simultaneously take my right foot of the pedal and lean right kicking the back end of the bike to the left... the driveway is gravel to the bike digs in and it works! The bike stops! Unfortunately I had so much momentum going that I got catapulted forward so now I am flying toward the rocks without the bike! Somehow before I land my back is now facing the rocks and I am sure I am going to be dead or paralyzed at least (it's amazing how much #### can go through your mind is a slit second). I slam to a stop and I'm stunned for a few seconds... until I realize I landed between the two big rocks! There wasn't much room between them, maybe 4 or 5 feet but I landed in the only spot I wouldn't get hurt. When I realized I wasn't hurt, we all just got back on our bikes and rode home. No more ditches for us.

Another bicycle story (probably a good thing that I don't have a motorcycle as an adult). I was riding alone down a busy street on the sidewalk but it had just rained. Caliper brakes don't work too well in the rain - it takes way longer to stop that normal. Given the conditions I was going too fast. I see this truck coming out of a parking lot in front of me and try to brake but it's just not working. The driver of the truck doesn't see me but the passenger (who I assume was his wife) does see me. I can't stop and he is still inching into my path. I am frozen and squeezing the brakes as hard as I can but it just won't stop. Finally a bunch of things seem to happen at the same time - he sees me, the bike finally stops (right in front of the truck), I throw my right leg over the bike so the truck doesn't hit it, the truck hit's the bike, me and the bike fall over, and the truck stops. I look to my right and all I can see is the grill of this giant pickup truck. I am not hurt at all because both the truck and the bike were going so slowly at the time of "impact". So I'm still on the ground and both people get out of the truck to see if I am OK and I'll never forget the looks on their faces... I know they thought they killed me. I can imagine the view of the accident from their perspective. One moment a kid on bike comes in front of them and the next second he disappears under the truck. I assured them I was fine and road away. They probably had to change their undergarments.

 
I've had two and both were in canoes.

The first happened when I was 16. I was doing an Outward Bound course in northern Ontario in the middle of nowhere. We were two weeks into a canoe trip when a flash storm hit. Our guides called everyone off the water. I was actually in the water about waist deep guiding the canoe by hand. We were about 300 feet from the shore when lightning hit the water beside me. I received the shock of my life and went into shock. I don't remember much after that.

The second happened on my honeymoon which was in Southern Africa. We on the first day of a 4-day canoe safari down the Zambezi river. It was a little windy and choppy and we were canoeing across a 500 foot wide channel. Halfway across, I feel a bump and hear a splash. My wife glares at the guys behind us because she thought they bumped us but their faces were ashen and they said a hippo had surfaced and bit and missed me by a foot. I looked down at the side of my canoe and there was a chunk out of it right by me. If I'd been paddling on that side, the hippo could have taken my wrist, elbow, shoulder or worse.
Was this you, chet?

 
I've had two and both were in canoes.

The first happened when I was 16. I was doing an Outward Bound course in northern Ontario in the middle of nowhere. We were two weeks into a canoe trip when a flash storm hit. Our guides called everyone off the water. I was actually in the water about waist deep guiding the canoe by hand. We were about 300 feet from the shore when lightning hit the water beside me. I received the shock of my life and went into shock. I don't remember much after that.

The second happened on my honeymoon which was in Southern Africa. We on the first day of a 4-day canoe safari down the Zambezi river. It was a little windy and choppy and we were canoeing across a 500 foot wide channel. Halfway across, I feel a bump and hear a splash. My wife glares at the guys behind us because she thought they bumped us but their faces were ashen and they said a hippo had surfaced and bit and missed me by a foot. I looked down at the side of my canoe and there was a chunk out of it right by me. If I'd been paddling on that side, the hippo could have taken my wrist, elbow, shoulder or worse.
Was this you, chet?
and those wee the two greatest actors of that generation??? Glad I was born after that era.
 
I've had two and both were in canoes.

The first happened when I was 16. I was doing an Outward Bound course in northern Ontario in the middle of nowhere. We were two weeks into a canoe trip when a flash storm hit. Our guides called everyone off the water. I was actually in the water about waist deep guiding the canoe by hand. We were about 300 feet from the shore when lightning hit the water beside me. I received the shock of my life and went into shock. I don't remember much after that.

The second happened on my honeymoon which was in Southern Africa. We on the first day of a 4-day canoe safari down the Zambezi river. It was a little windy and choppy and we were canoeing across a 500 foot wide channel. Halfway across, I feel a bump and hear a splash. My wife glares at the guys behind us because she thought they bumped us but their faces were ashen and they said a hippo had surfaced and bit and missed me by a foot. I looked down at the side of my canoe and there was a chunk out of it right by me. If I'd been paddling on that side, the hippo could have taken my wrist, elbow, shoulder or worse.
Maybe you should stay away from canoes?

 
Jesus johhnycakes, glad you are still with us bro.

I almost got murdered in the woods when I was 16. Guy tied a noose around my neck and to the back of his truck. Was just about ready to give me a Nantucket Sleighride when someone intervened and saved my life.
Why did he want to do that? Seems like party of the story is missing.
I was cutting through the woods with some friends. A couple of guys drive by in a big truck. Next thing I know a friggin lunatic is on top of me beating the snot out of me. He was yelling in Spanish, all I recognized was that he was going to kill me. He beat me unconscious, and when I woke up I was in a field with my hands tied behind my back and he was tying a rope around me neck hooked up to the back of his truck. The guy was going to kill me, no doubt. I could see it in his eyes. He went to start driving and suddenly one of my friends ran in front of the truck screaming. Then two other friends came out of the woods, and while they were arguing with the guy I got out of the ropes and ran like hell. The guy told the cops that I had thrown a rock at his truck. The cops didn't even arrest the guy despite me being a bloody mess and having rope burns around my neck. To this day I can't understand it.Oh, and the friend who ran out in front of the truck? He admitted a couple years later one night when he was drunk and in tears that he threw a rock at the guy's truck.
Dude.... beating someone let alone attempting to kill them for throwing a freaking rock at a freaking car?!

How do the cops not do anything?!

 
Jesus johhnycakes, glad you are still with us bro.

I almost got murdered in the woods when I was 16. Guy tied a noose around my neck and to the back of his truck. Was just about ready to give me a Nantucket Sleighride when someone intervened and saved my life.
Why did he want to do that? Seems like party of the story is missing.
I was cutting through the woods with some friends. A couple of guys drive by in a big truck. Next thing I know a friggin lunatic is on top of me beating the snot out of me. He was yelling in Spanish, all I recognized was that he was going to kill me. He beat me unconscious, and when I woke up I was in a field with my hands tied behind my back and he was tying a rope around me neck hooked up to the back of his truck. The guy was going to kill me, no doubt. I could see it in his eyes. He went to start driving and suddenly one of my friends ran in front of the truck screaming. Then two other friends came out of the woods, and while they were arguing with the guy I got out of the ropes and ran like hell. The guy told the cops that I had thrown a rock at his truck. The cops didn't even arrest the guy despite me being a bloody mess and having rope burns around my neck. To this day I can't understand it.Oh, and the friend who ran out in front of the truck? He admitted a couple years later one night when he was drunk and in tears that he threw a rock at the guy's truck.
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Jesus johhnycakes, glad you are still with us bro.

I almost got murdered in the woods when I was 16. Guy tied a noose around my neck and to the back of his truck. Was just about ready to give me a Nantucket Sleighride when someone intervened and saved my life.
Why did he want to do that? Seems like party of the story is missing.
I was cutting through the woods with some friends. A couple of guys drive by in a big truck. Next thing I know a friggin lunatic is on top of me beating the snot out of me. He was yelling in Spanish, all I recognized was that he was going to kill me. He beat me unconscious, and when I woke up I was in a field with my hands tied behind my back and he was tying a rope around me neck hooked up to the back of his truck. The guy was going to kill me, no doubt. I could see it in his eyes. He went to start driving and suddenly one of my friends ran in front of the truck screaming. Then two other friends came out of the woods, and while they were arguing with the guy I got out of the ropes and ran like hell. The guy told the cops that I had thrown a rock at his truck. The cops didn't even arrest the guy despite me being a bloody mess and having rope burns around my neck. To this day I can't understand it.Oh, and the friend who ran out in front of the truck? He admitted a couple years later one night when he was drunk and in tears that he threw a rock at the guy's truck.
Dude.... beating someone let alone attempting to kill them for throwing a freaking rock at a freaking car?!How do the cops not do anything?!
The incident happened in Pitkin Woods in East Hartford on land owned by the Portuguese Club. The locals who owned houses surrounding the land had been in a longstanding feud with the club. There was a Portuguese Fest put on every year and the neighbors wee sick of all the drunken crap taking place. Things had gotten pretty nasty and apparently there were several acts of vandalism on the Club in the months preceding the incident. The cop who interviewed me was a guy by the name of DePietro and owned land right next to the Club, so he was very aware of all the reports of vandalism coming in and I think he was sympathetic to them. I didn't know any of this at the time. All I knew was that I had the #### kicked out of me, had a rope tied around my neck, and that I pissed myself. The cop kept asking me over and over what we were doing there, if we had been involved in any prior incidents with the Club, etc. I got mouthy with the cop at one point and that was the end of that. He called me and my friends a bunch of punks and basically said that's what happens when you act like idiots. The guy who assaulted me admitted to the cop that he put the rope around my neck and tied me to the truck, but said he was just detaining me and was going to call the cops himself to have me arrested. Things got a little out of control at the scene when a few of my paisan friends called their older brothers and they started showing up, with their friends... Cops didn't like that at all.The worst part came when the cop dropped me off at my house and cast most of the blame on me and my friends to my parents, at one point insinuating that we may have been in the area to buy drugs. My parents were pissed about the whole ordeal, and due to some other politics I won't get into, they didn't think it was wise for us to pursue charges against the guy if the police didn't bring any themselves. And they didn't. I saw the guy at the Portugese Fest about a year later. I got hammered and gave serious thought to vandalizing his truck, but I just couldn't bring myself to do it. I got a cool nickname out of the deal - "hangman" - and my buddies years later still love to talk about it at reunions, so there's that I guess.

 

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