Does anyone here check their wipe? (1 Viewer)

[Soulfly3]

To make sure everything is the proper hue and lacking sanguine fluid?

Or do you do an immediate drop off?

 

[(HULK)]

Have to check. I keep wiping until I stop seeing brown. Or until I see red. Either or really.

 

[Baloney Sandwich]

Who doesn't check?

 

[Patriotsfatboy1]

How do you know when you are done?

 

[Soulfly3]

Some apparently dont check until the 2nd or 3rd wipe to make sure their clean

I check every. single. wipe

 

[Patriotsfatboy1]

Some apparently dont check until the 2nd or 3rd wipe to make sure their clean

I check every. single. wipe

How would you know if you had the perfect poop (aka a poop with no residual matter)?

 

[Dr Oadi]

If you can't get it in three wipes you deserve to walk around with a ####ty butt.

 

[mr roboto]

Wipe with paper till its clean, then one wipe with wet wipe. You could eat off my bung hole.

 

[Soulfly3]

Some apparently dont check until the 2nd or 3rd wipe to make sure their clean

I check every. single. wipe

How would you know if you had the perfect poop (aka a poop with no residual matter)?

Aka Ghost Poop

 

[bakes]

Why wouldn't you?

 

[AAABatteries]

Wipe with paper till its clean, then one wipe with wet wipe. You could eat off my bung hole.

I'm sure your BF appreciates the effort.

This will change your life

 

[bentley]

Wipe with paper till its clean, then one wipe with wet wipe. You could eat off my bung hole.

I'm sure your BF appreciates the effort.

This will change your life

There's a pack of those sitting by every toilet in the house.

 

[Zow]

Have to check. I keep wiping until I stop seeing brown. Or until I see red. Either or really.

 

[HughHoney]

How do blind people know when to stop wiping? Think they sniff the paper after every wipe? "Yep, my crack is still ####ty"

 

[BigJohn]

manscaping =

Poor form. When I go to the bathroom its like trying to get peanut butter out of shag carpeting

 

[SlaX]

When I doo doo, is my #### not brown?

It's a universal thing, we all flush it down

And when you wipe, do you look at the tissue?

Most folks do, it ain't even an issue

Hot stuff makes it burn comin' out
I bet everyone knows what I'm talkin' about
'Cause we are all one race on this planet
We all burp and fart, and that's the way God planned it

So don't act like you're superior
Eat something bad and just like me, you'll get diarrhea
'Cause black, white, yellow, red, brown or gold
Our #### all comes from the same little hole

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Yjd1hLJSKg

 

[jon_mx]

If you can't get it in three wipes you deserve to walk around with a ####ty butt.

Three is the minimum....usually go five with the last two going deep.

 

[kentric]

I tend to check. More to make sure I have everything covered.

 

[Leroy Hoard]

Some apparently dont check until the 2nd or 3rd wipe to make sure their clean

I check every. single. wipe

How would you know if you had the perfect poop (aka a poop with no residual matter)?

Aka Ghost Poop

The perfect poop is one of the best things in life. You wipe anyways but you really didn't have to.

 

[Scoresman]

you don't have to check if you have your bowels trained to have to go right before the daily shower.

 

[VA703]

If you can't get it in three wipes you deserve to walk around with a ####ty butt.

Three is the minimum....usually go five with the last two going deep.

how many fingers deep

 

[VA703]

you don't have to check if you have your bowels trained to have to go right before the daily shower.

1 poo a day for you?

 

[5-ish Finkle]

Of course you check. There may be a quarter, or or a winning lottery ticket, or something.

What the real pros are doing though? "Squatting" over the toilet. Get those knees above hips and let gravity do the work, brother. A bit more fuss, but a lot less muss.

Your giant car battery full of Kirkland brand adult baby wipes will last an eternity because of all the easy cleanups.

 

[BlueDredSo]

Who doesn't check?

 

[Leroy Hoard]

Of course you check. There may be a quarter, or or a winning lottery ticket, or something.

What the real pros are doing though? "Squatting" over the toilet. Get those knees above hips and let gravity do the work, brother. A bit more fuss, but a lot less muss.

Your giant car battery full of Kirkland brand adult baby wipes will last an eternity because of all the easy cleanups.

Coming in 2015: The Pro Squatting Tour

 

[Osaurus]

Fudge yeah!

 

[glock]

Some apparently dont check until the 2nd or 3rd wipe to make sure their clean

I check every. single. wipe

Always check after first wipe. Never heard of The Clean PinchTM??

 

[Scoresman]

you don't have to check if you have your bowels trained to have to go right before the daily shower.

1 poo a day for you?

pretty much, except maybe the day after eating Chinese food.

 

[Soulfly3]

Am I the only one who uses each side of the seat to "hold" by buttcheeks apart, for maximum crack cleanliness?

makes wiping a lot easier

 

[Scoresman]

Am I the only one who uses each side of the seat to "hold" by buttcheeks apart, for maximum crack cleanliness?

makes wiping a lot easier

oh hell yeah. the first 5-10 seconds or so of my craps are me rocking back and forth on the seat, pulling my cheeks further and further apart on each pass.

 

[Warhogs]

Dang it. This thread had me laughing out loud at work.

 

[Soulfly3]

Am I the only one who uses each side of the seat to "hold" by buttcheeks apart, for maximum crack cleanliness?

makes wiping a lot easier

oh hell yeah. the first 5-10 seconds or so of my craps are me rocking back and forth on the seat, pulling my cheeks further and further apart on each pass.

yup..

though I can honestly say Ive gone "too far" with this and sometimes hurt myself... Dont know if it was a stretched hoop or just tore some crack skin... but it hurt.

but Ive got it down to a science now

 

[5-ish Finkle]

Coming in 2015: The Pro Squatting Tour

This needs to happen now.

It could be judged on form, length of product before breakage, amount of splash, dismount, etc.

A perfect score would, obviously, be a "2."

Am I the only one who uses each side of the seat to "hold" by buttcheeks apart, for maximum crack cleanliness?

makes wiping a lot easier

Squatting does the same thing, really. Plus, it lines up all the innards properly for "maximum efficacy of elimination."

Getting that "maximum taper," gets you the easiest cleanup.

 

[ClownCausedChaos2]

Am I the only one who uses each side of the seat to "hold" by buttcheeks apart, for maximum crack cleanliness?

makes wiping a lot easier

oh hell yeah. the first 5-10 seconds or so of my craps are me rocking back and forth on the seat, pulling my cheeks further and further apart on each pass.

yup..

though I can honestly say Ive gone "too far" with this and sometimes hurt myself... Dont know if it was a stretched hoop or just tore some crack skin... but it hurt.

but Ive got it down to a science now

Amateurs. I bought a used speculum off of a gyno buddy of mine. Now I don't even have to push. Insert. Spread. Sploosh.

 

[jamny]

Happiness is a clean break

 

[5-ish Finkle]

Amateurs. I bought a used speculum off of a gyno buddy of mine. Now I don't even have to push. Insert. Spread. Sploosh.

Next time you may want to ask him to include the used autoclave too. Y'know, just to be 100% safe.

 

[VA703]

Am I the only one who uses each side of the seat to "hold" by buttcheeks apart, for maximum crack cleanliness?

makes wiping a lot easier

oh hell yeah. the first 5-10 seconds or so of my craps are me rocking back and forth on the seat, pulling my cheeks further and further apart on each pass.

yup..

though I can honestly say Ive gone "too far" with this and sometimes hurt myself... Dont know if it was a stretched hoop or just tore some crack skin... but it hurt.

but Ive got it down to a science now

ive noticed if you stretch it too far, the brown star closes up. leaving you with a bunch of spaghetti sized poo

 

[AAABatteries]

you don't have to check if you have your bowels trained to have to go right before the daily shower.

My link

 

[Scoresman]

I'd also like to add that wiping doesn't matter if you crap right before getting in the tub with your kids.

 

[mad sweeney]

Wipe with paper till its clean, then one wipe with wet wipe. You could eat off my bung hole.

I need to have a drying wipe afterwards.

DOn't need to check every time, you should be able to feel when it's getting close to clean. If it's sanguine, there should be signs in the bowl.

 

[ClownCausedChaos2]

Amateurs. I bought a used speculum off of a gyno buddy of mine. Now I don't even have to push. Insert. Spread. Sploosh.

Next time you may want to ask him to include the used autoclave too. Y'know, just to be 100% safe.

Pfft. Sterilization is a myth.

 

[Dentist]

Wipe with paper till its clean, then one wipe with wet wipe. You could eat off my bung hole.

I'm sure your BF appreciates the effort.

This will change your life

There's a pack of those sitting by every toilet in the house.

but i rarely flush them, usually throw them out because i've read too many things about even the flushable wipes ruining your plumbing.

 

[5-ish Finkle]

Pfft. Sterilization is a myth.

For your sake, I hope so. A yeast infection....back there....sounds less than "happy fun times."

 

[Kenny Powers]

Who doesn't check?

 

[joffer]

Who doesn't check?

have to at least look for an image of Jesus

 

[dickey moe]

This thread is making me hungry.

 

[Schmeabs]

Feels like a Keerock thread

 

[(HULK)]

Update:

I now use TP to start and then Dude Wipes as a finisher. Much cleaner outcomes IMO.


*still check after each pass though. I mean, if you don't, how do you know that you've concluded your business?

 

[Keerock]

How do blind people know when to stop wiping? Think they sniff the paper after every wipe? "Yep, my crack is still ####ty"

Proof reader, of course.

 

[Keerock]

Feels like a Keerock thread

Well... this topic is definitely one in the WN? hopper...