Favorite Quotes (1 Viewer)

[sticky]

I would like to direct this to the distinguished members of the panel: You lousy cork-soakers. You have violated my farging rights. Dis somanumbatching country was founded so that the liberties of common patriotic citizens like me could not be taken away by a bunch of fargin iceholes... like yourselves.

 

[Jaysus]

I have made love to many fine ladies from the lowliest bus station skank to the classiest most sophisticated, educated, debutant, high society... bus station skank.

 

[Leroy Hoard]

I once saw a forklift lift a crate of forks. And it was way to literal for me.
.- Mitch Hedberg

 

[Charlie Steiner]

Because he's thirsty, dummy.