Help me make sense of this voicemail. Is it bow chick a wow wow time (1 Viewer)

[NewlyRetired]

No, it was my work voicemail. Apparently when I get a voicemail it sends an email with the recording. My wife did hear it since I opened it as she was sitting next to me. 

she must have had some sort of comment about it one way or another..?

 

[AcerFC]

she must have had some sort of comment about it one way or another..?

She is a teacher as well and just thought it was strange. I mean, it had to be a porn dream right

 

[NewlyRetired]

if you are looking to fish but don't want to use phone, see if you can find an odd time to leave her a quick voice mail message pointing her to email.   Call from a number she won't recognize in case she picks up.

Something short and sweet like "hey XXXX, I got your message, if you want to contact me again please use xxxx@gmail.com   Hope to hear from you."

 

[OrtonToOlsen]

Whenever old students try to get in touch with me I tell them all the same thing.

"I'm not getting paid to be nice to you any more. Get bent."

 

[dickey moe]

Hey guys, H2O are getting back together! It's called the H2O2 Reunion Tour.

 

[Dan Lambskin]

Hey guys, H2O are getting back together! It's called the H2O2 Reunion Tour.

Relevant

 

[Dentist]

Call her up and ask if she's ever heard of the glass bottom boat move.

Great move

 

[AcerFC]

Just found her on facebook



Apparently I screwed her up bad getting her into punk music. Her husband has a neck tattoo. 

 

[SacramentoBob]

So how would I phrase this. 

Hey, it's been a while. Of course I remember you. Send some pics for me and my ibuds 

How hot was she when she was your student?

 

[Nick Vermeil]

At least get her to send pics.

Clearly he's already looked her up on social by now.  Who would play her in the movie?

*** sorry for hippling.  

 

[Buckychudd]

Just found her on facebook



Apparently I screwed her up bad getting her into punk music. Her husband has a neck tattoo. 

 

[ShamrockPride]

Hydration is important 

I think you meant lubrication.

 

[bcdjr1]

So how would I phrase this. 

Hey, it's been a while. Of course I remember you. Send some pics for me and my ibuds 

Ask for her Snapchat. I think the rest will just happen from there. 

 

[Ramsay Hunt Experience]

Since you know you'd never act on it, the wise move is to just assume she's nursed a 17 year desire to bone you and use it as validation. 

 

[Kafka]

if you are looking to fish but don't want to use phone, see if you can find an odd time to leave her a quick voice mail message pointing her to email.   Call from a number she won't recognize in case she picks up.

Something short and sweet like "hey XXXX, I got your message, if you want to contact me again please use xxxx@gmail.com   Hope to hear from you."

Hmmm...you sly dog, you....never woulda thought...,

 

[AcerFC]

Now that I actually found the pictures, im conflicted. Want to come through for the ibuds, but not sure if its a slimeball move. 

I would say she is a high 6, low 7. 

Now, not when she was in middle school KRS. 

 

[Kafka]

Since you know you'd never act on it, the wise move is to just assume she's nursed a 17 year desire to bone you and use it as validation. 

#TheBenzema...Proxy?

 

[AcerFC]

Prob just a 6 after looking again. 

 

[[icon]]

Now that I actually found the pictures, im conflicted. Want to come through for the ibuds, but not sure if its a slimeball move. 

I would say she is a high 6, low 7. 

Now, not when she was in middle school KRS. 

If you need me to photoshop/sanitize any aspects of the image before posting, I'll be happy to. Inbox me. 

 

[Dreamer]

She either wants to borrow money, or rob and murder you. Good luck.

 

[McGarnicle]

Whenever something like this happens, I envision what would happen if my wife found out, the various ways she might find out, and I assign a risk score. So far the risk has always greatly outweighed the benefit and it ended there.

But yeah, if you're really asking, she wants you to pork her brains out nine ways from Sunday. 

 

[northern exposure]

Whenever old students try to get in touch with me I tell them all the same thing.

"I'm not getting paid to be nice to you any more. Get bent."

Even the ones that want you to make them stay after class because they have been naughty? 

I may have seen some videos online on the subject.

 

[OrtonToOlsen]

Even the ones that want you to make them stay after class because they have been naughty? 

I may have seen some videos online on the subject.

Uh...they're 8th graders. Not sure what videos you're watching, Mr. Polanski.

 

[northern exposure]

Uh...they're 8th graders. Not sure what videos you're watching, Mr. Polanski.

I thought we were talking about old students that were contacting you long after you were their teacher. No Polanski or Woody Allen type videos. 

 

[Skipdog77]

H2O is an old hardcore band I was friends with 

Inconsequential to the story

I was thinking it was the classic Hall and Oates album. 

 

[OrtonToOlsen]

I thought we were talking about old students that were contacting you long after you were their teacher. No Polanski or Woody Allen type videos. 

Why would old students need to stay after class?  WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?

 

[Kafka]

Whenever old students try to get in touch with me I tell them all the same thing.

"I'm not getting paid to be nice to you any more. Get bent."

Whenever old teachers try to get in touch with me*, I tell them all the same thing...

"I'm not paying your salary anymore.  Get bent, ya old coot.

*they don't

 

[northern exposure]

Why would old students need to stay after class?  WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?

I don't write the script for these videos!! The plots are very confusing sometimes!! I just enjoy the cinematography.

 

[Maik Jeaunz]

just reply with an email that says:

"can size?"

 

[gianmarco]

just reply with an email that says:

"can size?"

Response:  "Can size what....?"

 

[Dan Lambskin]

Now that I actually found the pictures, im conflicted. Want to come through for the ibuds, but not sure if its a slimeball move. 

I would say she is a high 6, low 7. 

Now, not when she was in middle school KRS. 

Perfect!  Hot enough to enjoyably bang but likely with enough self esteem issues to throw down on some dude old enough to be her dad

 

[flapgreen]

I read the first sentence and after having read the thread title I thought you were about to bang a teen, which I can't condone on an open forum, but certainly wouldn't mind reading about... so then I was hoping it was a teen's mom...   then I read the rest of it and was disappointed it was neither, and H20 sucks.

Agreed completely 

 

[Henry Ford]

For those who do not keep detailed notebooks, I am an 8th grade teacher. The next school year will be my 18th year. I fit more into Otis second tier than first. 

Anyway, I check my email the other day and a voicemail pops into the inbox. Didn't even know this could happen. 

The voicemail says this

Mr. Acer, this is xXxX xXxX, well it's really this xXxX bc I am married now. I don't know if you will remember me, but I had you in 2000. You got me into H2O and a few other bands. The reason I was calling is to see how you were doing. I had a dream about you and thought I would call. If you want to call back here is my number and email. Again, hope you are doing well. 



All kidding aside, I do not have it in me to ever have an affair. I love my wife and kids. But this has to be some kind of penthouse forum thing, no?

"I told my wife about your email, and she said to ask you if you like ecstasy and mild roleplay humiliation"

 

[jerry jones]

For those who do not keep detailed notebooks, I am an 8th grade teacher. The next school year will be my 18th year. I fit more into Otis second tier than first. 

Anyway, I check my email the other day and a voicemail pops into the inbox. Didn't even know this could happen. 

The voicemail says this

Mr. Acer, this is xXxX xXxX, well it's really this xXxX bc I am married now. I don't know if you will remember me, but I had you in 2000. You got me into H2O and a few other bands. The reason I was calling is to see how you were doing. I had a dream about you and thought I would call. If you want to call back here is my number and email. Again, hope you are doing well. 



All kidding aside, I do not have it in me to ever have an affair. I love my wife and kids. But this has to be some kind of penthouse forum thing, no?

Her husband is probably a teacher and just was caught banging one of his students. She's thinking...well, I know a teacher too.

so yes get on the banging bus!!

 

[belljr]

ftr -   brown chicken brown cow   

 

[The General]

Your wife is testing you.

 

[kentric]

Your wife is testing you.

You don't text with a 6.  

Too easy to resist.  ;-)

 

[Ned]

Perfect!  Hot enough to enjoyably bang but likely with enough self esteem issues to throw down on some dude old enough to be her dad

"I told my wife about your email, and she said to ask you if you like ecstasy and mild roleplay humiliation"

Both of these    http://68.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lxz93dxV5X1r3lt5ho1_250.gif

 

[cockroach]

Probably just wants to thank you for saving her life.  She'd be dead in a few days without H20

 

[jon_mx]

H2O is an old hardcore band I was friends with 

Inconsequential to the story

So she hooked up with them first.  

 

[Osaurus]

Start braising ground beef

 

[McGarnicle]

Even if you don't do anything, please make up a long detailed story about banging her at a fancy hotel & include a scene where she's pressed up against the glass shower door. TIA

 

[Dan Lambskin]

Even if you don't do anything, please make up a long detailed story about banging her at a fancy hotel & include a scene where she's pressed up against the glass shower door. TIA

Can we get an odd color hair (pink, purple, etc) and some piercings (maybe a nice nose hoop and some nipple bars)

 

[Righetti]

29 or 30

So what would a single AcerFC do?

 

[AcerFC]

So what would a single AcerFC do?

If we are being honest. I would come up with a plan in my head of all the nasty things I would do. Obviously would include a glass shower door and piercings. I would play this out in my head for the better part of a week. Then I would pick up the phone, and surf the web never calling or emailing her. 

Today there is texting though. I would prob throw out a few texts. 

Im thinking of emailing back. Just so she doesnt think I am rude. Basic, thx for reaching out. Hope all is well.

I know I made the thread thinking there was a chance she wanted me, but I highly doubt it. It's been a long time since we have seen each other. I dont think she has hidden this lust for me for 17 years. 

 

[Tom Servo]

I know I made the thread thinking there was a chance she wanted me, but I highly doubt it. It's been a long time since we have seen each other. I dont think she has hidden this lust for me for 17 years. 

WHAT ABOUT OUR ENTERTAINMENT, DARN IT?!?!?

 

[SacramentoBob]

I dont think she has hidden this lust for me for 17 years. 

Maybe she's really shy.

 

[RokNRole]

Have you called her back yet?

 

[SacramentoBob]

@AcerFCupdate?

 

[McGarnicle]

If we are being honest. I would come up with a plan in my head of all the nasty things I would do. Obviously would include a glass shower door and piercings. I would play this out in my head for the better part of a week. Then I would pick up the phone, and surf the web never calling or emailing her. 

Today there is texting though. I would prob throw out a few texts. 

Im thinking of emailing back. Just so she doesnt think I am rude. Basic, thx for reaching out. Hope all is well.

I know I made the thread thinking there was a chance she wanted me, but I highly doubt it. It's been a long time since we have seen each other. I dont think she has hidden this lust for me for 17 years. 

Sometimes these things lay dormant for a while, then there's a trigger, like her dream.

Think about that chick you wanted to bang when you were in high school, maybe she had a boyfriend or you were just too chicken to talk to her. She'd come to school in a little miniskirt and that sense of longing was sweet torture. Maybe you haven't thought about her in years, but if you suddenly found yourself with an opportunity to hit it (assume you were single) and she still looked good? That lust would come flooding back like no time had passed. And buddy, those are the sessions that leave you exhausted with a sore #### the next morning. Suddenly you can get it up 8 times a night like you're a teenager again.