tommyboy
Footballguy
setup:
sister in law is narcissist wife with everything in the world, good kids, stay at home mom lives in 900K house, drives new car, has new clothes, plenty of food, kids in private school etc... life is upper middle class. This gal is an expert at nuclear arguments. (the type where you go straight to level 10 maximum pain)
brother in law is normal dude, a little naive, not a quick thinker in an argument and lets things fester till he blows up. A little immature and has biting sarcastic sense of humor. This doesn't work on wife who doesn't know what humor is, at all.
Story:
sister in law torments brother in law because of any particular reason that pops into her head at any given moment. She thrives on drama, anger, resentment, jealousy, rage, you name it she LOVES it. Doesn't matter if its her husband, mom, dad, sisters or brothers, she wants to be the victim and everyone else is the abuser. Everyone will share in her imagined problems. She will out text you, she will out call you, she will out Facebook you, she will get a megaphone and stand in the street screaming if necessary so that everyone shares her drama.
I have been steadily, patiently for years explaining to my wife (her sister) that her sister is nuts, and stupid, and anything that comes out of her mouth take with a grain of salt as though a 5 yr old said it. Over the last several years my wife has recognized that her sister is crazy and learned not to take it so personally when she blows up and slams the phone on her. I'm fine with that, because until today this psychotic woman has never tried to get ME involved in her little drama circles. Keep in mind we've been married 20 yrs and i've known this family for 26 years.
so today she lies to my wife about something I allegedly said, that I never said. How to respond?
My first impulse was to call her directly and just tell her, i never said that so drop it,ok, thanks, buhbye. But then I thought some more and decided I wouldn't respond, at all. why should I give this chick the reaction she so desperately craves.
How would you handle this>? I sense a trap. In case you can't tell from the above, the marriage is on the rocks and has been getting worse for 3 years. In 90% of the situations I side with the brother in law.
sister in law is narcissist wife with everything in the world, good kids, stay at home mom lives in 900K house, drives new car, has new clothes, plenty of food, kids in private school etc... life is upper middle class. This gal is an expert at nuclear arguments. (the type where you go straight to level 10 maximum pain)
brother in law is normal dude, a little naive, not a quick thinker in an argument and lets things fester till he blows up. A little immature and has biting sarcastic sense of humor. This doesn't work on wife who doesn't know what humor is, at all.
Story:
sister in law torments brother in law because of any particular reason that pops into her head at any given moment. She thrives on drama, anger, resentment, jealousy, rage, you name it she LOVES it. Doesn't matter if its her husband, mom, dad, sisters or brothers, she wants to be the victim and everyone else is the abuser. Everyone will share in her imagined problems. She will out text you, she will out call you, she will out Facebook you, she will get a megaphone and stand in the street screaming if necessary so that everyone shares her drama.
I have been steadily, patiently for years explaining to my wife (her sister) that her sister is nuts, and stupid, and anything that comes out of her mouth take with a grain of salt as though a 5 yr old said it. Over the last several years my wife has recognized that her sister is crazy and learned not to take it so personally when she blows up and slams the phone on her. I'm fine with that, because until today this psychotic woman has never tried to get ME involved in her little drama circles. Keep in mind we've been married 20 yrs and i've known this family for 26 years.
so today she lies to my wife about something I allegedly said, that I never said. How to respond?
My first impulse was to call her directly and just tell her, i never said that so drop it,ok, thanks, buhbye. But then I thought some more and decided I wouldn't respond, at all. why should I give this chick the reaction she so desperately craves.
How would you handle this>? I sense a trap. In case you can't tell from the above, the marriage is on the rocks and has been getting worse for 3 years. In 90% of the situations I side with the brother in law.
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