So, definitely a personal finance question, but also a life question and looking for any wisdom/advice.
long story short, girl friend lives in Denver; I'm in the Chicago area; We've continued to see each other since she moved, but distance (and other factors) have created some issues in our relationship.
We both agree we need to spend more time together, but I'm against staying in Denver for longer than 2 weeks at a time (she had suggested 1 month) given that we have had issues of late. I'm also not ready to move to Denver.
She currently rents, I currently own a condo (no renting allowed) where I have a great interest rate (2.12% on a 15 year with about 13.5 years remaining). I have a job in the Chicago area where I have to make appearances from time to time, she is full time remote in Denver. She moved there to be around her 2 brothers and loves nature.
I have suggested that she consider moving back to Chicago, but she wants to stay in Denver. I may ask that she comes to Chicago for longer periods (I do 95% of the traveling today to Denver) to help bridge the gap as well.
I am planning to suggest longer stays (2 week stays), plus a vacation later this year (we haven't done that before) AND asking her to come to Chicago more often. I am not ready to move Denver, but also understand she wants to stay and am willing to consider moving there, but I don't think we're ready for that yet, nor can we ignore finances - I own a condo with a historically low interest rate and have a job I need to be somewhat present for (I have a team that reports to me, but we are mainly remote). She doesn't have a mortgage - is just renting - and has the fully remote job. To me, this is somewhat simple. If distance is one of the issues (which I agree that it is), come to Chicago more often.
In the meantime, I am not going to commit to moving to Denver for the time being and am not going to be put any time frame on it if we are struggling to spend shorter time together. I think we need to reset our relationship and see if we can make it through this period.
Saying a lot above to give some context and happy too address any questions.....
Looking for any general advice on how to handle this from a financial standpoint. She rents, I own. How do we even consider a future together with our current commitments, I am at a place in my life where I don't want to rent, just own.
Any ways to make the relationship work while we are distant other than what I have suggested? Am what I am suggesting reasonable?