Question about Catholicism and divorce (1 Viewer)

[MC Gas Money]

My fiance's family is very catholic and she wants me to revieve the neccessary sacraments so we can get married in a church one day.

I am an atheist from a very lax catholic family and have had nothing to do with religion after my communion.

As many of you know I was previously married in a civil ceremony that ended in divorce on grounds of legally proven adultery on her part.

Am I now disallowed to be married in a catholic church?

Im hoping this is my way out. I dont want to go through the process for something that is completely meaningless to me.

 

[1234]

The wedding is always about the girl.

HTH

 

[fantasycurse42]

1234 with 555 posts... Awesome

He should get to 567 and stop there.

 

[MC Gas Money]

Lol

 

[Scoresman]

tell her you're gay. then for sure they wont let you get married there.

 

[johnnycakes]

Forget about the previous marriage; you can shop for an annulment. The real fly in the ointment is you say you are an atheist. Were you going to bluff your way through this for the benefit of your bride-to-be?

 

[MC Gas Money]

Forget about the previous marriage; you can shop for an annulment. The real fly in the ointment is you say you are an atheist. Were you going to bluff your way through this for the benefit of your bride-to-be?

She knows I am an atheist. She wants me to do it to appease her family.

 

[Snoopy]

Since the first marriage wasn't sanctified by a church, I don't think the Catholic church would recognize it as a marriage that would need to be annulled first.

 

[otello]

Which sacraments are on deck?

 

[MC Gas Money]

Which sacraments are on deck?

Dont know. I stopped at the communion.

 

[otello]

If you had communion then next up is confirmation.

 

[mr roboto]

Will you have to be baptized?

 

[Scoresman]

does the lobotomy come before or after the confirmation?

 

[MC Gas Money]

Will you have to be baptized?

Took care of that 31 years ago

 

[Psychopav]

Since the first marriage wasn't sanctified by a church, I don't think the Catholic church would recognize it as a marriage that would need to be annulled first.

This imo.

You and your wife should follow your consciences, not put on a show to please the family.

 

[MC Gas Money]

does the lobotomy come before or after the confirmation?

After but before the wedding

 

[Dexter]

I believe you are disallowed. A buddy of mine was married in a none religious ceremony. He got divorced and when he went to get married to a catholic woman the church still made him go through that whole stupid process (I forget what it's called).

 

[MC Gas Money]

Since the first marriage wasn't sanctified by a church, I don't think the Catholic church would recognize it as a marriage that would need to be annulled first.

This imo.You and your wife should follow your consciences, not put on a show to please the family.

Thats what I said.

I dont really know how much it really matters to her and how much is just wanting to please here fam.

Truth is I likely wont go through all this hoopla, so im hoping to get out of it be having gotten divorved.

Dont I have to go to classes and take some tests?

 

[MC Gas Money]

I believe you are disallowed. A buddy of mine was married in a none religious ceremony. He got divorced and when he went to get married to a catholic woman the church still made him go through that whole stupid process (I forget what it's called).

What process? Was he able to get married or not?

 

[Psychopav]

Since the first marriage wasn't sanctified by a church, I don't think the Catholic church would recognize it as a marriage that would need to be annulled first.

This imo.You and your wife should follow your consciences, not put on a show to please the family.

Thats what I said.

I dont really know how much it really matters to her and how much is just wanting to please here fam.

Truth is I likely wont go through all this hoopla, so im hoping to get out of it be having gotten divorved.

Dont I have to go to classes and take some tests?

Yes, pre cana classes which are about marriage and the test is like a compatibility test that the priest uses to identify areas which might be potential problem areas so you can talk about them before you get hitched.

 

[MC Gas Money]

Since the first marriage wasn't sanctified by a church, I don't think the Catholic church would recognize it as a marriage that would need to be annulled first.

This imo.You and your wife should follow your consciences, not put on a show to please the family.

Thats what I said.I dont really know how much it really matters to her and how much is just wanting to please here fam.

Truth is I likely wont go through all this hoopla, so im hoping to get out of it be having gotten divorved.

Dont I have to go to classes and take some tests?

Yes, pre cana classes which are about marriage and the test is like a compatibility test that the priest uses to identify areas which might be potential problem areas so you can talk about them before you get hitched.

Problems like my atheism and baphomet tat on my forearm?

 

[Binky The Doormat]

Since the first marriage wasn't sanctified by a church, I don't think the Catholic church would recognize it as a marriage that would need to be annulled first.

This imo.You and your wife should follow your consciences, not put on a show to please the family.

Thats what I said.

I dont really know how much it really matters to her and how much is just wanting to please here fam.

Truth is I likely wont go through all this hoopla, so im hoping to get out of it be having gotten divorved.

Dont I have to go to classes and take some tests?

Yes, pre cana classes which are about marriage and the test is like a compatibility test that the priest uses to identify areas which might be potential problem areas so you can talk about them before you get hitched.

Yeah, after reviewing the tests we took and some kind of report from the class leader/teacher, the priest counselor told my Catholic wife (I was raised Presbyterian) that we weren't compatible and she shouldn't marry me. Not - "we" shouldn't get married ...she shouldn't marry me, I was too selfish and independent (...and non-Catholic).

He said this right in front of me, with both of us there, I was like, "hey, I'm right here!!"

I think I may have been a little too frank in all my pre cana tests and class interactions.

...almost 28 years later, we are still together and I have lost whatever control of the house that I had at one time as the older, more selfish #### head.

 

[ChiefD]

Go talk to a priest.

When he's giving you the behind the scenes tour of the church, I'm sure he will tell you what he wants you to hear.

 

[Psychopav]

Since the first marriage wasn't sanctified by a church, I don't think the Catholic church would recognize it as a marriage that would need to be annulled first.

This imo.You and your wife should follow your consciences, not put on a show to please the family.

Thats what I said.

I dont really know how much it really matters to her and how much is just wanting to please here fam.

Truth is I likely wont go through all this hoopla, so im hoping to get out of it be having gotten divorved.

Dont I have to go to classes and take some tests?

Yes, pre cana classes which are about marriage and the test is like a compatibility test that the priest uses to identify areas which might be potential problem areas so you can talk about them before you get hitched.

Yeah, after reviewing the tests we took and some kind of report from the class leader/teacher, the priest counselor told my Catholic wife (I was raised Presbyterian) that we weren't compatible and she shouldn't marry me. Not - "we" shouldn't get married ...she shouldn't marry me, I was too selfish and independent (...and non-Catholic).

He said this right in front of me, with both of us there, I was like, "hey, I'm right here!!"

I think I may have been a little too frank in all my pre cana tests and class interactions.

...almost 28 years later, we are still together and I have lost whatever control of the house that I had at one time as the older, more selfish #### head.

Sounds like a ####ty priest to me.

 

[MC Gas Money]

Since the first marriage wasn't sanctified by a church, I don't think the Catholic church would recognize it as a marriage that would need to be annulled first.

This imo.You and your wife should follow your consciences, not put on a show to please the family.

Thats what I said.I dont really know how much it really matters to her and how much is just wanting to please here fam.

Truth is I likely wont go through all this hoopla, so im hoping to get out of it be having gotten divorved.

Dont I have to go to classes and take some tests?

Yes, pre cana classes which are about marriage and the test is like a compatibility test that the priest uses to identify areas which might be potential problem areas so you can talk about them before you get hitched.

Yeah, after reviewing the tests we took and some kind of report from the class leader/teacher, the priest counselor told my Catholic wife (I was raised Presbyterian) that we weren't compatible and she shouldn't marry me. Not - "we" shouldn't get married ...she shouldn't marry me, I was too selfish and independent (...and non-Catholic).

He said this right in front of me, with both of us there, I was like, "hey, I'm right here!!"

I think I may have been a little too frank in all my pre cana tests and class interactions.

...almost 28 years later, we are still together and I have lost whatever control of the house that I had at one time as the older, more selfish #### head.

Now i want to go through this process and be honest just to see what they say about me.Should be a real hoot

 

[MC Gas Money]

Go talk to a priest.

When he's giving you the behind the scenes tour of the church, I'm sure he will tell you what he wants you to hear.

Which is?

 

[Binky The Doormat]

Since the first marriage wasn't sanctified by a church, I don't think the Catholic church would recognize it as a marriage that would need to be annulled first.

This imo.You and your wife should follow your consciences, not put on a show to please the family.

Thats what I said.

I dont really know how much it really matters to her and how much is just wanting to please here fam.

Truth is I likely wont go through all this hoopla, so im hoping to get out of it be having gotten divorved.

Dont I have to go to classes and take some tests?

Yes, pre cana classes which are about marriage and the test is like a compatibility test that the priest uses to identify areas which might be potential problem areas so you can talk about them before you get hitched.

Yeah, after reviewing the tests we took and some kind of report from the class leader/teacher, the priest counselor told my Catholic wife (I was raised Presbyterian) that we weren't compatible and she shouldn't marry me. Not - "we" shouldn't get married ...she shouldn't marry me, I was too selfish and independent (...and non-Catholic).

He said this right in front of me, with both of us there, I was like, "hey, I'm right here!!"

I think I may have been a little too frank in all my pre cana tests and class interactions.

...almost 28 years later, we are still together and I have lost whatever control of the house that I had at one time as the older, more selfish #### head.

Sounds like a ####ty priest to me.

The best part was that he didn't know either one of us and was outwardly disinterested in the entire conversation.

 

[Fennis]

my friend just an annulment after 18 years of marriage and 3 kids. you can do whatever you want.

 

[MC Gas Money]

my friend just an annulment after 18 years of marriage and 3 kids. you can do whatever you want.

We couldnt get an annulment in nys

 

[Binky The Doormat]

my friend just an annulment after 18 years of marriage and 3 kids. you can do whatever you want.

We couldnt get an annulment in nys

Get in a car.

Travel across state.

Drop her off at the courthouse and call the lawyer.

 

[MC Gas Money]

my friend just an annulment after 18 years of marriage and 3 kids. you can do whatever you want.

We couldnt get an annulment in nys

Get in a car.

Travel across state.

Drop her off at the courthouse and call the lawyer.

My ex wife?

 

[Our Gang]

I had almost same situation. you're good to get married in the Catholic Church after some procedural issues. you're first isn't recognized due to lack of canonical form.

 

[MC Gas Money]

I had almost same situation. you're good to get married in the Catholic Church after some procedural issues. you're first isn't recognized due to lack of canonical form.

What procedures?

 

[Our Gang]

just had to fill out some paperwork and I got the green light.

 

[MC Gas Money]

just had to fill out some paperwork and I got the green light.

Dammit

Thanks for the heads up

 

[cstu]

The best part was that he didn't know either one of us and was outwardly disinterested in the entire conversation.

You weren't 12.

 

[Binky The Doormat]

The best part was that he didn't know either one of us and was outwardly disinterested in the entire conversation.

You weren't 12.

#### in' bingo. No pun intended.

 

[Riversco]

Forget about the previous marriage; you can shop for an annulment. The real fly in the ointment is you say you are an atheist. Were you going to bluff your way through this for the benefit of your bride-to-be?

She knows I am an atheist. She wants me to do it to appease her family.

I think this sort of reasoning has been going on for the past 4000 years at least.

 

[Fennis]

my friend just an annulment after 18 years of marriage and 3 kids. you can do whatever you want.

We couldnt get an annulment in nys

Its not a legal annulment, legally they got divorced. The Church then annulled their marriage allowing them both to remarry in the church (if they wanted).

 

[Zow]

You weren't initially married in the church so you should be fine to get married in the church since you don't need an annulment.

Pay the stipend and do the pre-marriage classes and you'll be fine.

 

[shader]

How much does the church charge for all these marriage services?

 

[Zow]

Oh yeah, you're going to hate the pre-marriage classes. But shut your mouth through them and you'll be fine. Just get ready to enjoy learning that it's a sin to do anything but soak the walls.

 

[Zow]

How much does the church charge for all these marriage services?

Our mandatory voluntary stipend to literally do the marriage was like 1k. Classes were a few hundred in mandatory donations I think.

 

[Psychopav]

How much does the church charge for all these marriage services?

Our mandatory voluntary stipend to literally do the marriage was like 1k. Classes were a few hundred in mandatory donations I think.

It varies parish by parish. Nobody should be turned away if they legitimately can't afford it. Not sure where you live but that sounds really overpriced to me.

 

[Zow]

How much does the church charge for all these marriage services?

Our mandatory voluntary stipend to literally do the marriage was like 1k. Classes were a few hundred in mandatory donations I think.

It varies parish by parish. Nobody should be turned away if they legitimately can't afford it. Not sure where you live but that sounds really overpriced to me.

This was in Tempe arizona at the church on asu campus. It's a popular requested marriage spot. Supply and demand probably played a role.

 

[Psychopav]

How much does the church charge for all these marriage services?

Our mandatory voluntary stipend to literally do the marriage was like 1k. Classes were a few hundred in mandatory donations I think.

It varies parish by parish. Nobody should be turned away if they legitimately can't afford it. Not sure where you live but that sounds really overpriced to me.

This was in Tempe arizona at the church on asu campus. It's a popular requested marriage spot. Supply and demand probably played a role.

Makes sense then. You were paying for the venue. It might cost me $200 to go through the pre-cana at my local parish, plus whatever tips I want to give to the priest and servers, but if I want the Cathedral in Joliet I bet it would be boku bucks.

 

[MC Gas Money]

How much does the church charge for all these marriage services?

Our mandatory voluntary stipend to literally do the marriage was like 1k. Classes were a few hundred in mandatory donations I think.

There is no way im doing this now.

Classes is one thing but there is no chance in hell im giving the church a dime

 

[Psychopav]

How much does the church charge for all these marriage services?

Our mandatory voluntary stipend to literally do the marriage was like 1k. Classes were a few hundred in mandatory donations I think.

There is no way im doing this now.Classes is one thing but there is no chance in hell im giving the church a dime

Time for a dose of reality.You would pay any other venue for the use of their facilities, wouldn't you?

You would also pay a judge or a ship's captain a stipend for presiding I hope. This is a public ceremony and you are inviting your friends and family to come witness it. You'll pay for flowers, fr for music, and you'll keep on paying until you're done with the honeymoon.

Then the costs of the marriage itself will begin to kick in.

 

[Zow]

As others indicated you may be able to get it waved due to inability to pay. Or maybe your bride's parents will pay for it.

 

[MC Gas Money]

How much does the church charge for all these marriage services?

Our mandatory voluntary stipend to literally do the marriage was like 1k. Classes were a few hundred in mandatory donations I think.

There is no way im doing this now.Classes is one thing but there is no chance in hell im giving the church a dime

Time for a dose of reality.You would pay any other venue for the use of their facilities, wouldn't you?

You would also pay a judge or a ship's captain a stipend for presiding I hope. This is a public ceremony and you are inviting your friends and family to come witness it. You'll pay for flowers, fr for music, and you'll keep on paying until you're done with the honeymoon.

Then the costs of the marriage itself will begin to kick in.

Not that.

I mean im not paying for classes and sacraments