What's the most 'bachelor' thing you ever did? (1 Viewer)

[Sarnoff]

Not sure how bachelorish this was, but anyway: One of my roomates in college had an enormous head. Nobody else at BC had a head nearly as large, until junior year someone spotted some doofus freshman with a noggin that he claimed rivaled it. We tracked the kid down and staged a "head-off" at a party where they each stuck their head in a bucket of water to see who displaced the most liquid. Tons of dough wagered on each side, the freshman won.

 

[deadstick]

Using underwear as a coffee filter

Throwing away dishes with moldy food residue on a somewhat regular basis, then using cardboard containers (like the front of a cereal box) as a replacement and cheaper alternative to paper plates

Re-chewing tobacco

Living on wild game for 2 years, including squirrel and mud hen - which are not really "game"

Sleeping in the field/ice house/slough so I could hunt the next day again without wasting money on gas to go home and back

*although it wasn't on purpose, I discovered that if eggs get really rotten, they become solid - almost like a hard-boiled egg. If they get really, really rotten, they liquify again and can induce vomiting

 

[AhrnCityPahnder]

 

[RudiStein]

Using underwear as a coffee filterThrowing away dishes with moldy food residue on a somewhat regular basis, then using cardboard containers (like the front of a cereal box) as a replacement and cheaper alternative to paper platesRe-chewing tobaccoLiving on wild game for 2 years, including squirrel and mud hen - which are not really "game"

Was this when you were "flooded-in"?

 

[shuke]

Living on wild game for 2 years, including squirrel and mud hen - which are not really "game"

Oh come on.

 

[Frostillicus]

My roommates and I stole on of those big stand-up ashtray/garbage can things from outside the dorms when we lived off campus. Of course, it was tied down with wire when we tried at first, so we had to go back to the house and get wire-cutters, then drive back and cut the wires. Then the damn thing wouldn't fit in the trunk, so we drove home with the trunk 80% open, hoping that it wouldn't fall out nor that we'd get pulled over. Was worth it to have that outside the house for parties.

 

[Luke Skywalker]

This thread is hilarious.

When I was about 23-24, my best friend from college and I lived next door to each other in an apartment complex. We became friends with a guy in the building across from us. (Incidentally this guy was from New Zealand and his accent could charm anybody which comes into play)

Anyway, my buddy comes home one day with this big heavy spool of cable. Who knows where he stole it from or how he managed to get it in the trunk of his car. So we used it to run ziplines connecting each other balconies, a distance of maybe 35 feet.

Now, dismounting from the zipline was a little tricky. Let go too early and you missed the balcony and fell into the bushes. Let go too late and you slammed into the wall. But through trial and error we had it timed pretty good.

All was well until New Zealand's one-night-stand got high on pills and coke and got on the zipline, only to freak out midway through. She fell into the courtyard and had her fall broken by a rosebush and smacked her head on the ground. She's still high as #### and her face and arms are bleeding all over from the thorns and she starts screaming and acting all crazy, saying she's going to call the police and the apartment manager and all kinds of stuff, then gets in her car and leaves.

We're still laughing when the police come about an hour later with this girl in tow. New Zealand guy is innocent as a 50's sitcom and goes "Officer I have no idea who this is or why she decided to hang from my clothesline at 2 a.m., but she's clearly on some kind of drugs and I don't associate with people like that."

The cop actually bought it and the chick flipped out saying she was going to kill us and that she just had sex with New Zealand guy and his apartment is full of drugs and child porn (AFAIK neither was true). Apparently at that point the cop finally noticed she was high as a kite, gave her a sobriety test on the spot and arrested her with about 20 people watching.

We never heard or saw that girl again. A couple days later, as the apartment manager tells, she came to evict us but changed

her mind when she saw a whole lot of freshly washed laundry on the "clothesline".

 

[Luke Skywalker]

Another time, drunk and horny, I ziplined over to New Zealand guys' place to borrow his Josie Maran poster. I tried to return it like 20 minutes later but he told me to keep it. I still have it.

 

[glumpy]

This thread is hilarious.When I was about 23-24, my best friend from college and I lived next door to each other in an apartment complex. We became friends with a guy in the building across from us. (Incidentally this guy was from New Zealand and his accent could charm anybody which comes into play)Anyway, my buddy comes home one day with this big heavy spool of cable. Who knows where he stole it from or how he managed to get it in the trunk of his car. So we used it to run ziplines connecting each other balconies, a distance of maybe 35 feet. Now, dismounting from the zipline was a little tricky. Let go too early and you missed the balcony and fell into the bushes. Let go too late and you slammed into the wall. But through trial and error we had it timed pretty good.All was well until New Zealand's one-night-stand got high on pills and coke and got on the zipline, only to freak out midway through. She fell into the courtyard and had her fall broken by a rosebush and smacked her head on the ground. She's still high as #### and her face and arms are bleeding all over from the thorns and she starts screaming and acting all crazy, saying she's going to call the police and the apartment manager and all kinds of stuff, then gets in her car and leaves.We're still laughing when the police come about an hour later with this girl in tow. New Zealand guy is innocent as a 50's sitcom and goes "Officer I have no idea who this is or why she decided to hang from my clothesline at 2 a.m., but she's clearly on some kind of drugs and I don't associate with people like that."The cop actually bought it and the chick flipped out saying she was going to kill us and that she just had sex with New Zealand guy and his apartment is full of drugs and child porn (AFAIK neither was true). Apparently at that point the cop finally noticed she was high as a kite, gave her a sobriety test on the spot and arrested her with about 20 people watching.We never heard or saw that girl again. A couple days later, as the apartment manager tells, she came to evict us but changed her mind when she saw a whole lot of freshly washed laundry on the "clothesline".

 

[loser]

Living on wild game for 2 years, including squirrel and mud hen - which are not really "game"

Oh come on.

Ha. The Terror of Toledo.

 

[Otis]

another one from college..went to a party at Otis' college and I drew a huge scoreboard on the fridge to keep track of how many chicks we could hook up with that night.trouble was that it was a permanent marker and those idiots had to live in a house with the Righetti Scoreboard plastered on their fridge for the rest of the year and I'm sure had a lot of explaining to do whenever they brought a new girlfriend around

Verified.

 

[Addai's Adidas]

In my first apartment after the dorms we did not pay the electric bill. It was my job to go into the utility room, which was next to the community laundry room, and get into the power company boxes and turn out power on when we needed it, which was in the evenings drinking with girls over. After doing it awhile and not getting caught, we just left it on. Then just moved out and left everything behind.

 

[Fly]

We created "stadium style" seating with couches and milk crates. One couch on the floor, then another raised on milk crates behind it.

Piled 20 guys into a van to go to Wendy's for free Frosties.

I had a notorious habit of falling asleep on the couch in my underwear with my computer on my stomach and a half empty beer clutched in one hand. One morning this was also accompanied by quite the morning wood which all the roommates had to walk by. The guys acted funny around me for most of the day. I don't think they knew how to bring it up (or, more accurately, bring it back down).

 

[mr roboto]

Junior year in college, we never washed anything except our clothes. There was one towel that was always wet - we had 6 guys living in the apartment, and no one knew whose it was, but apparently everyone used it.

At the end of the year, we burned our couch, armchair, that towel, the bathroom and entryway rugs etc. because they were so gross we were worried if we put them out next to the dumpster, some other group of guys would grab them and use them (which, incidentally, is how we got the rugs, couch and chair).

We had an overzealous security guard on campus who loved giving parking tickets (private, wooded campus with very limited parking). One of my buddies' girlfriends would bring her car on campus on the weekends, but never got a permit (as a freshman, it was really hard to get one).

She got so many tickets, they put a boot on her car (yellow disc-looking thing). We went out there, popped the lock off, took it off her car, then looked up the model # online and bought a replacement lock mechanism online from a supply company. We booted the security SUV and they didn't have the key.

He would have gotten away with it, but during winter break, the RA and RD did a sweep of the dorms, looking for violations and anything that wasn't unplugged, and freezers not defrosted etc. The idiot left the old lock, and the instructions for how to install the new lock, in his closet. I think that cost him $500 in fines.

We were the most heavily fined single freshman floor in the history of our small private college. We actually made a t-shirt like the Mastercard commercials (those Priceless ones) where we listed all the major fines (Parking Boot - $500, 20ft high bonfire - $500, hacking the alarm system - $400) then "3rd floor *name of dorm* - Priceless.

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

Some gems from the original thread (somethingawful)

"I didn't want to with finding a clean spoon, so I drank pudding out of the little cup it came in. Wiped my face on the chair in which I was sitting."

"My bed frame had broken on one side so I just slept diagonally for a couple of weeks before finally fixing it."

"I've used beer instead of water when brushing my teeth"

"I was about to sit down to a nice pot of ramen, and enjoy it with a ruler. My roommate wanted some, so I dumped half of it on a piece of paper, and snapped the ruler in half so he would have a utensil as well.

I've also eaten Easy Mac with a staple remover by cocking my head back and letting the noodles fall into my mouth."

And my favorite:

"If I've had my underwear on so long it gets itchy and I don't want to do laundry, I'll just shove a paper towel down there for a day or two."

This thread needed bumping.

And I ran across this.

 

[DSP]

I used a sock as a teabag to make weed tea because I couldnt smoke in the room I was renting

Did this for a couple weeks before finding put THC is only fat solubal. Wasted a lot of weed

 

[Zow]

Yours is a bit more crazy, but I've done:1. Used a Busch Light box as a dining room table for the longest time. 2. Didn't do laundry until I had re-worn every pair of boxers/underwear I had at least 3 times. That was gross. 3. When my toilet broke I used my sink for about a week because I didn't feel like telling my landlord. 4. Threw dishes out in the trash instead of washing them. 5. Slept on a mattress on the floor for an entire year - living in two separate places. 6. Sprayed deodorant in my pants because I was going to see a girl and I had ran out of soap. 7. Hired a younger girl who I felt awkward to date to clean my place for me on a bi-weekly basis even though she didn't do a good job because I felt bad for her situation and it was the only way I could justify to myself staring at her ###. 8. I don't think I've ever actually bought napkins. 9. Have always just ate the total cleaning cost (basically given up my rent deposit) because I have no desire to clean my apartments. 10. Used a basketball as a meat tenderizer (sp?)

I'm going to call "B S" on 3, 8, 9 and 10.

Suppose I can reply over 3 years later.

3. Rented an attic/room from a family house in law school. I treated the place like crap so never really wanted them to come up there. Somehow the flusher broke. Given that I was rarely there anyway (stayed at a girl's place like every other night) and if I needed to crap I could go to the school, I didn't get around to telling my landlord/homeowners for like a week. If I had to urinate I just went in the sink and washed it out.

8. Really? I'm now married and still haven't bought napkins. We get enough take out that we have plenty leftover or we just use paper towels.

9. Still true up to my last move out before getting married. My deposits were never more than like 300 or so. I hate cleaning with a passion. Always thought the opportunity cost was worth the deposit. I was also always up front on that and some of the times even struck a deal stating they clean it as is and keep half or whatever.

10. Not sure what to tell you here. Couldn't afford decent meat in law school so I bought the cheap stuff. Stove was right next to front door and I'd keep my basketball there. Would grab the ball and pound away at the crappy meat through the plastic.