So I was in Africa about ten years ago and as you can imagine, pretty much anything goes there. Gas stations consisted of benzine in a glass bottle, kids would fight like jackals over a snickers you just gave them and I have actually seen a chick fill a pot hole in town with a healthy poop in the middle of the day. I was there with the Air Force and there are a lot of rules governing behavior, dealing with the population and things that could hurt the credibility of the mission.
So we were in Northern Cameroon near the Tchad, Nigeria and Central African Republic borders, the outer edges of the Sahara. We were staying in a pretty decent hotel for the mission which was to deliver and administer various medical treatments to villages all over this wasteland. Pretty cool, people walked 50 miles to come get a tooth pulled! So General Order #1 was absolutely, under no circumstances...were we to have the secks with any local chicks. Reason? Estimated Aids rates in the local area were 30% to 60%!!! Problem was when we'd get back to the hotel each night there were 15-20 scantily dressed African women, fully browned and delicious.
Anyway, they were all hookers. So they had to remove them every night after complaints from the command staff but they kept coming back. So I wasn't going to let a good opportunity pass me by so I asked one of the girls what their rates were. I was referred to a man in a felt hat (Even if it wasn't felt I wanted it to be, so it was) who tried to tell me it was $100 for an hour. I said nothing turned and walked away. So the guy chased me down and almost tackled me. He said $50? I said $10? He said $40? I said $10. He said no, I left. So I told this story to some weird guy we were out there with (he was an inoculation specialist or something) and he said he had never had a black woman. I told them he would be taking a big chance even with latex and he said he had other ideas.
So the next day I went back to the Felt Hat and began what was to be an hour of intense negotiations. I said I would not pay $40 for one, but would pay $40 for three. His starting point for three was $150 which I told him made no sense if he was giving me one for $40. When we finally settled on a price we had to start all over again because he wanted to pick the girls, some cost more than others apparently which I thought he was making up on the spot (Nigerian guy). So finally we settled on three girls of my choice for $65. Now the guy that wanted one had already given me $40 plus a $20 "finders fee" which allowed me two girls for $5. But I wasn't crazy enough to do anything with chicks that might have Aids-ridden ######s, so I took all three girls to the hotel manager's office where we had access to a cot and the twot.
Went to get the guy and brought him down to see the girls but did not tell him there were three. When he got there he said, "so which one do I get?" I said, "all three, two on me buddy." I told him I needed to see all the girls naked to make sure they met his high standards first so I had all three strip down and then felt sick I wasn't able to do anything. He assured me all he was getting was a handy and whatever else, but no penetration (I didn't care, I did it for the comedy and the borderline criminal aspects). Left the guy and the girls, went about my business and then to my room (we were staying three to a room IIRC). About two hours later I heard a knock on the door next door and heard, "sir, we have a problem!" The vice commander was next door, he went with the MP to investigate. Apparently the guy I got the girls for not only had intercourse with them but also left his DNA in one of the girls on purpose, which the girl didn't agree to nor particularly care for.
So a huge fight broke out and the girls took the guy's cloths and locked him in the office. The MPs heard the ruckus and responded and when they got there they saw a naked Airman on top of the guy with the felt hat, rolling around on the floor with a couple of homeless dogs. The girls were screaming, a crowd formed and some bystanders (possibly gangsters) had even brandished a weapon. MPs broke it up and they did interviews and all of that. I was ####ed, no way this dude was going to leave me out of this I thought...I was gonna be sent home in disgrace for arranging a prostitution ring. So that night, nothing.
Next day, nothing. No one came to talk to me. A few days later I finally saw the guy and he just smiled, nothing was said. They sent him home that day but he allegedly told the MPs a story of deceit and betrayal, a heinous crime was committed against him. He said that the guy in the felt hat wanted his seed and the three girls were the man's daughters. At knife point he was to impregnate all three, or die. Stranger things have happened in Africa... Not sure if he ever got the Aids.
:dropsmicwalksoffstage:
by a pair of brothers. To this day, I don't know if she meant actual brothers or black guys.
