2 Dobermans, 8 Racoons, 30 Squirrels (1 Viewer)

[Bob Sacamano]

Oh! I know this one!

1 red hen

2 cute ducks

3 brown bears

4 running hares

5 fat females sitting sipping scotch, smoking cigarettes

 

[Ditkaless Wonders]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tgj3nZWtOfA

That's a bad tempered rodent.

 

[Hov34]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tgj3nZWtOfA

 

[Short Corner]

Is anyone else confused on how to answer the actual pole? 

Couldn't tell if I was picking the easiest or toughest to handle.  Also wasn't sure if it was all of us in one big melee or we just take on one of three options.

Either way, the one I think would be the toughest would be the dobermans.  They are the only ones that have the strength to truly incapacitate a human in a short time.  The other two could cause a lot of flesh wounds, but to the death, I think I kill them before they could kill me.

Raccoons will #### you up.  Those things are miniature bears.  With thumbs.  At least with the two dobermans you have a punchers chance of decapitating one early.

 

[Hov34]

By the way, why is this not a video game sim?

 

[ChainsawU]

Are the dobermans gay?

 

[ChainsawU]

Also, the raccoons in this scenario, do I owe them money or no?

 

[ChainsawU]

Does it have to be a square or can I fight them in a triangle? I'd fight the raccoons, but only if I got to get an angry kangaroo to fight with me as an ally. Realistically I would accept all three of those challenges if you let me fight alongside any type of kangaroo.

 

[AhrnCityPahnder]

 I would train with this guy and wreck all those racoons.

 

[AAABatteries]

So, this came up on the LeBatard show yesterday when they have Ron Magill (from the Miami Zoo) on to answer "sports" related animal questions.  Someone asked him (an animal expert) this question (might have been one of you knuckleheads).  He without hesitation said he would rather fight the dogs.  His theory was he could maybe snap one of the dogs necks without taking too much damage from the other one and then just have the one to deal with. 

He was adamant about not fighting the squirrels - saying there were too many and all it would be over if one bit or the jugular. And he said the raccoons were nasty with very sharp teeth.

I was like most of you and would have said squirrels, but now I'm not so sure.

I definitely think 8 racoons is last but I'm still leaning squirrels over the dogs. 

 

[Hot Diggity Dog]

I definitely think 8 racoons is last but I'm still leaning squirrels over the dogs. 

No way am I going in with 8 raccoons, you would have to be nuts.  Dogs maybe you could break a leg on one or something,  but full grown dobermans are pretty impressive animals.  Squirrels for me , I know I can ring a squirrels neck quickly.

 

[IC FBGCav]

Wow. We are the only two that listen to LeBatard.

 

[loser]

Stop, drop, and roll might be a good strategy against squirrels.  I'm thinking I could probably crush 4-5 per roll.

User name checks out

 

[IC FBGCav]

Doberman is the answer, then racoons, the squirrels.

Numbers matter.  Fyi.

 

[Galileo]

No way am I going in with 8 raccoons, you would have to be nuts.  Dogs maybe you could break a leg on one or something,  but full grown dobermans are pretty impressive animals.  Squirrels for me , I know I can ring a squirrels neck quickly.

experienced?

 

[mr roboto]

Wow. We are the only two that listen to LeBatard.

That’s 2 too many.

 

[Foosball God]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QPK8Nxofb3c

this is one doberman, no way anyone could handle two.

 

[dgreen]

There's certainly a non-zero chance that squirrels is the wrong answer here. But, your mindset going into this thing is important and I believe that I'd be most confident against squirrels. Sure, maybe it's misplaced confidence, but put me in that room with Dobermans or raccoons and my confidence is way down before I even go in and I'm much more scared. Against squirrels, I at least believe in myself.

 

[Hov34]

Friend of mine said Dobermans.  At least it would be over with quickly.  With the squirrels and Raccoons it could take a while before they bleed him out...

 

[Hot Diggity Dog]

experienced?

squirrels ain't that much  different than rats

 

[Kanil]

You've got them listed in order of difficulty, but I would be victorious in either scenario.

**EDIT**

I'm assuming victory means they die first.  I feel like this is like the winner of a knife fight.  The winner is the one that dies in the hospital rather than the street.

 

[Hov34]

No way I want 8 of these coming after me, even if I did have a rake.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PoKuOBLWZpI

or

https://youtu.be/3CupJy3iguo?t=22

 

[-fish-]

If I'm fighting the raccoons, do i get a fleshlight?

 

[Kanil]

If I'm fighting the raccoons, do i get a fleshlight?

One for each raccoon.

 

[GregR]

No need for that.  I give the squirrels all the peanuts, sunflower seeds, and apples that they wanna eat.  A new baby squirrel started coming by yesterday.

Squirrel plans for world dominion:

1) get foolish humans to feed us while we grow our numbers

2) Organize into packs of 30...

 

[Hov34]

Changing my answer to Squirrels.  I just don't think I could snap a Doberman's neck without getting mauled to death by the other one.  At least with the Squirrels I could kill one or two and use them as nun-chucks.  Forget the coons, no way I could handle 8 -  those things are evil.

 

[Ditkaless Wonders]

Feeling salty today, give me all of them.  I'd make hand puppets out of each Doberman and wielding my doby hands I would wade into the crowd of coons and squirrels trying to find an exit and I would fabishem at em.