At a loss for words . . . the vacation that never happened (apparently) (1 Viewer)

[Anarchy99]

Was reminiscing with the little woman over the weekend about some of the trips and vacations we had gone on over the years. We are going on a cruise again for the first time since the dark ages of the pandemic, so we focused on other cruises we had been on.

MY VERSION OF ONE OF THE TRIPS:
We left from Port A on a summer cruise and travelled to Destination B. It was just the two of us (ie, no kids). She didn't feel well and spent multiple days in the cabin sick. She told me not to worry about her and instructed me to go have fun without her (no point in both of us not doing anything). There are pictures of us on the cruise, pictures of me doing stuff without her, pictures of our time at the destination, and souvenirs and knickknacks still in our possession of this outing.

HER VERSION:
There was no such trip, we have never gone on a cruise without the kids, we never took a cruise in the summer, and we never went on a cruise from Points A to B. She never went on a cruise and got sick, she never told me to go have fun without her, and there would be no way she wouldn't participate in activities on a cruise unless she was in a morgue. My "irrefutable visual evidence" is from a different trip (as are the souvenirs).

This turned into a very bizarre and contentious conversation, as she cited from memory, chapter and verse, all the cruises we had been on together, the years, the participants, and the destinations. Period, exclamation point. Talk to the hand. There wasn't another cruise that was not accounted for.

Anyone else ever have discussions about places you've been (or apparently never been)?

 

[gianmarco]

Good thing you know you're wrong.

 

[General Malaise]

Is this gaslighting?

 

[mr. furley]

which one of you took the ketamine this morning?

 

[Nugget]

Start hiding memories.

 

[Anarchy99]

Start hiding memories.

After our conversation, I kept thinking I was in a Talking Heads song.

And you may find yourself in another part of the world
And you may find yourself behind the wheel of a large automobile
And you may find yourself in a beautiful house, with a beautiful wife
And you may ask yourself, "Well, how did I get here?"

And you may ask yourself, "How do I work this?"
And you may ask yourself, "Where is that large automobile?"
And you may tell yourself, "This is not my beautiful house"
And you may tell yourself, "This is not my beautiful wife"

 

[bryhamm]

Same as it ever was

 

[msudaisy26]

Clearly you went there with another woman, be happy she didn't think of that!!!

 

[Gally]

Clearly you went there with another woman, be happy she didn't think of that!!!

I thought for sure that is where the story was going to end up.

 

[belljr]

so was the other woman you went on vacation with still in touch?

 

[Hot Diggity Dog]

Pics or it never happened.

 

[Gally]

I have never had a memory rehash that was that blatantly different to have one of us saying we didn't do X at all while the other being sure we did. But some of the memories of things happening at X vacation may have been different or missing.....just not the whole vacation.

 

[Chemical X]

she’s right, you’re wrong. never mention this again. i mean, she is a woman.

 

[Anarchy99]

Pics or it never happened.

That's kind of the point. There are pics. Of us. Together. On land. And on sea. But the pics are being disputed . . . and the pictures are being used to describe other trips and destinations.

 

[Anarchy99]

Clearly you went there with another woman, be happy she didn't think of that!!!

I did tell her that I must have gone on a trip with a different wife. She does remember some of the things I mentioned and agrees that some of those things actually did happen, just not on my phantom trip.

 

[Pip's Invitation]

Do you have receipts or other financial/logistical documentation that this trip existed?

 

[FreeBaGeL]

Pics or it never happened.

That's kind of the point. There are pics. Of us. Together. On land. And on sea. But the pics are being disputed . . . and the pictures are being used to describe other trips and destinations.

Are they digital? They would have a tiimestamp then, right?

 

[need2know]

Do you have another wife?

 

[hagmania]

Pics or it never happened.

That's kind of the point. There are pics. Of us. Together. On land. And on sea. But the pics are being disputed . . . and the pictures are being used to describe other trips and destinations.

Are they digital? They would have a tiimestamp then, right?

Abandon hope all ye who enter


Do not continue this path.

 

[Runkle]

lol I remember a conversation with my gf regarding a particular tropical beach experience, and how it was located next to a horse farm. She denied such a place existed. I said, "no, it's like right next to the horses", and she said "If there were horses there, I definitely would have taken pictures on my phone." So she opened up her camera roll, scrolled back to the date in question, and found dozens of photos of the horses next to the beach.

She contends that she was right, since there were horses there, she did take pictures, and was not in the wrong.

 

[ChiefD]

I've done this before. Started going on and on about a restaurant we went to or somewhere we hiked or whatever. My wife just looks at me with a blank stare before uttering in disdain:

"wrong wife"

(i had been married before)

Yep boys, on those days I stay in the garage and sleep in the boat.

 

[Scoresman]

So not only do cruises make you sick, but they affect your memory too!

 

[Anarchy99]

Pics or it never happened.

That's kind of the point. There are pics. Of us. Together. On land. And on sea. But the pics are being disputed . . . and the pictures are being used to describe other trips and destinations.

Are they digital? They would have a tiimestamp then, right?

I showed her printed pictures of the trip. There are probably digital files of the pics somewhere, but who knows where they are. Even if I found them, she would say they were pics from a different trip.

The best part was when I told her the things I did without her (when she was sick in the cabin). Saw a show. Went to the casino. Climbed the rock wall. Went to the onboard gym. Entered a trivia contest. She was like, "I don't remember that . . . no way that happened." I pointed out that that made sense, as she was in the cabin and that's what I did to kill time WITHOUT her. I showed her pics that I had someone take of me on the climbing wall and she insisted it wasn't me in the picture because I don't do rock climbing.

 

[Hot Diggity Dog]

Pics or it never happened.

That's kind of the point. There are pics. Of us. Together. On land. And on sea. But the pics are being disputed . . . and the pictures are being used to describe other trips and destinations.

Are they digital? They would have a tiimestamp then, right?

I showed her printed pictures of the trip. There are probably digital files of the pics somewhere, but who knows where they are. Even if I found them, she would say there were pics from a different trip.

The best part was when I told her the things I did without her (when she was sick in the cabin), Saw a show. Went to the casino. Climbed the rock wall. Went to the onboard gym. Entered a trivia contest. She was like, "I don't remember that . . . no way that happened." I pointed out that that made sense, as she was in the cabin and that's what I did to kill time WITHOUT her. I showed her pics that I had someone take of me on the climbing wall and she insisted it wasn't me in the picture because I don't do rock climbing.

Sounds like she is really, really, smart and playing with you, or really, really, not.

 

[El Floppo]

Imo, you should keep hitting her with info until she caves.

Chicks dig that.

 

[Anarchy99]

Imo, you should keep hitting her with info until she caves.

Chicks dig that.

I realize that when digging a deep hole, the best thing to do is stop digging. I'm not bringing this up again with her. I clearly can't cave and say I made it all up, but I can just put the stories back in the proverbial closet and remember things on my own.

 

[Skipdog77]

She sent you out on solo activities because she was sick, eh? I bet she remembers the cabin boy then.

 

[BroncoFreak_2K3]

Start hiding "other" female cruise companions

 

[Chemical X]

make her a mix tape?

 

[ChiefD]

The shark move would be to get one of those digital picture frames and place it somewhere in the house with only those vacation photos on it. Just set it on a bookcase or in a room where she doesn't go often. But when she does, those photos will be on a sliding loop so they catch her eye.

 

[shuke]

The shark move would be to get one of those digital picture frames and place it somewhere in the house with only those vacation photos on it. Just set it on a bookcase or in a room where she doesn't go often. But when she does, those photos will be on a sliding loop so they catch her eye.

And then claim that frame has been there for years.

 

[Zow]

I remember visiting Nelson Mandela's grave just shortly after seeing that Sinbad movie where he plays a genie. For lunch I had a really good PB&J with Jiffy peanut butter (passed on Chic-FilA). I think during lunch I was reading a Berenstein Bear book with a monocle like the one the Monopoly guy has.

 

[3 hour lunch]

I’ve never heard of annything quite that extreme, that’s pretty weird. I do always joke with my wife that I will only argue a (factual) point when I’m about 99% sure. She will argue about something when she is like 51% sure, even if it’s against me and she knows I’m 99% sure. If I show her proof she’ll just say “Oh, I didn’t think it was” and go about her day like nothing happened. I don’t understand it.

 

[Zow]

Is this gaslighting?

Gaslighting is not a real term and no such concept exists.

 

[The Gator]

lol I remember a conversation with my gf regarding a particular tropical beach experience, and how it was located next to a horse farm. She denied such a place existed. I said, "no, it's like right next to the horses", and she said "If there were horses there, I definitely would have taken pictures on my phone." So she opened up her camera roll, scrolled back to the date in question, and found dozens of photos of the horses next to the beach.

She contends that she was right, since there were horses there, she did take pictures, and was not in the wrong.

 

[Beef Ravioli Part 2]

Are you Doug Heffernan?

Doug Gets Carrie Confused With An Ex | The King of Queens

Doug takes a trip down memory lane. Unfortunately it wasn't Carrie he was thinking about...From Season 6 Episode 4 'Doug Less I'. Doug takes Carrie on a trip...

youtu.be

 

[Mrs. Rannous]

I have no idea how long ago this was, but your bank/credit card statements will show that you paid for the cruise and the items purchased.

Unless you are a pirate.

 

[Cowboysfan8]

lol I remember a conversation with my gf regarding a particular tropical beach experience, and how it was located next to a horse farm. She denied such a place existed. I said, "no, it's like right next to the horses", and she said "If there were horses there, I definitely would have taken pictures on my phone." So she opened up her camera roll, scrolled back to the date in question, and found dozens of photos of the horses next to the beach.

She contends that she was right, since there were horses there, she did take pictures, and was not in the wrong.

 

[jhib]

Any chance either/both of you have Google Maps timeline recording a history of your location & trips?

I mean, not that it would matter, but still...

 

[skol asylum]

If you have pictures on your phone or in the cloud they may have digital time and location data attached to them depending on how long ago it was.

 

[Terminalxylem]

i don’t know how sick your wife was, but it‘s not unheard of to experience delirium with febrile illness, especially as we age.

 

[Anarchy99]

Any chance either/both of you have Google Maps timeline recording a history of your location & trips?

I mean, not that it would matter, but still...

This all happened 10 or 12 years ago. None of the pics were saved to the cloud or posted on social media. The digital record is probably on a storage card for a camera we don't have anymore. Any other pics would be on a phone we don't have either. As someone else suggested, it is probably too late to go through credit card statements or get bank records, but even if that were still possible, no good can really come from that. "Hi honey, here's a subpoena compelling your bank to disclose transaction records from the trip we never took. Have a nice day!"

And for anyone suggesting that maybe I am thinking of a trip with someone else, I never went on a cruise with anyone else, so I am not conflating or confusing a trip with somebody else. I am trying to remember if the part about never going without any of our kids could be accurate, but I don't remember anything involving kids. Her contention is we would have had to have gone with at least our youngest. I remember checking in on my wife multiple times a day when she was sick, but I have no recollection of having to keep tabs on any kids at the same time. Our son would have been around 10, and there would have been no way we would have just let him wonder around all on his own. In my version of reality, he stayed with his grandparents for us to go on the trip.

 

[Pip's Invitation]

Any chance either/both of you have Google Maps timeline recording a history of your location & trips?

I mean, not that it would matter, but still...

This all happened 10 or 12 years ago. None of the pics were saved to the cloud or posted on social media. The digital record is probably on a storage card for a camera we don't have anymore. Any other pics would be on a phone we don't have either. As someone else suggested, it is probably too late to go through credit card statements or get bank records, but even if that were still possible, no good can really come from that. "Hi honey, here's a subpoena compelling your bank to disclose transaction records from the trip we never took. Have a nice day!"

And for anyone suggesting that maybe I am thinking of a trip with someone else, I never went on a cruise with anyone else, so I am not conflating or confusing a trip with somebody else. I am trying to remember if the part about never going without any of our kids could be accurate, but I don't remember anything involving kids. Her contention is we would have had to have gone with at least our youngest. I remember checking in on my wife multiple times a day when she was sick, but I have no recollection of having to keep tabs on any kids at the same time. Our son would have been around 10, and there would have been no way we would have just let him wonder around all on his own. In my version of reality, he stayed with his grandparents for us to go on the trip.

If said grandparents are still with us, you could get them to corroborate. But it’s probably not worth dragging them into this.

 

[Pip's Invitation]

And of course one of the “similar threads” is “Yet More Proof Women Are Impossible to Please”.

 

[GroveDiesel]

I remember visiting Nelson Mandela's grave just shortly after seeing that Sinbad movie where he plays a genie. For lunch I had a really good PB&J with Jiffy peanut butter (passed on Chic-FilA). I think during lunch I was reading a Berenstein Bear book with a monocle like the one the Monopoly guy has.

Were you wearing your Fruit of the Loom with the cornucopia logo in them?

 

[Mrs. Rannous]

I remember visiting Nelson Mandela's grave just shortly after seeing that Sinbad movie where he plays a genie. For lunch I had a really good PB&J with Jiffy peanut butter (passed on Chic-FilA). I think during lunch I was reading a Berenstein Bear book with a monocle like the one the Monopoly guy has.

Were you wearing your Fruit of the Loom with the cornucopia logo in them?

You Can't Overlove Your Underwear

So moving.

 

[belljr]

Any chance either/both of you have Google Maps timeline recording a history of your location & trips?

I mean, not that it would matter, but still...

And for anyone suggesting that maybe I am thinking of a trip with someone else, I never went on a cruise with anyone else, so I am not conflating or confusing a trip with somebody else.

Well not that you remember, anyway.

 

[GroveDiesel]

I love the idea that your wife has also posted her side of this on a message board she frequents and everyone there 100% convinced that you are wrong.

The Lifetime Original twist of course would be that one of you, sadly, would be in the early stages of dementia and the spouse/viewer slowly begins to realize that what they thought was an amusing disagreement is actually the effects of no longer remembering things that happened, or getting memories jumbled up/creating false memories. We then watch as that person slowly fades away and reality slips from their mind. And as their spouse grieves, new love begins to blossom with the in-home caretaker who so lovingly cares for their declining spouse.

 

[shuke]

I am trying to remember if the part about never going without any of our kids could be accurate, but I don't remember anything involving kids.

I was totally on your side until this part.

 

[shuke]

Any chance either/both of you have Google Maps timeline recording a history of your location & trips?

I mean, not that it would matter, but still...

This all happened 10 or 12 years ago. None of the pics were saved to the cloud or posted on social media. The digital record is probably on a storage card for a camera we don't have anymore. Any other pics would be on a phone we don't have either. As someone else suggested, it is probably too late to go through credit card statements or get bank records, but even if that were still possible, no good can really come from that. "Hi honey, here's a subpoena compelling your bank to disclose transaction records from the trip we never took. Have a nice day!"

And for anyone suggesting that maybe I am thinking of a trip with someone else, I never went on a cruise with anyone else, so I am not conflating or confusing a trip with somebody else. I am trying to remember if the part about never going without any of our kids could be accurate, but I don't remember anything involving kids. Her contention is we would have had to have gone with at least our youngest. I remember checking in on my wife multiple times a day when she was sick, but I have no recollection of having to keep tabs on any kids at the same time. Our son would have been around 10, and there would have been no way we would have just let him wonder around all on his own. In my version of reality, he stayed with his grandparents for us to go on the trip.

If said grandparents are still with us, you could get them to corroborate. But it’s probably not worth dragging them into this.

Dragging them into this? This sounds like a humorous disagreement, not something contentious. Am I misunderstanding?