Drinking Etiquette (1 Viewer)

[AAABatteries]

So, earlier this year my BIL gave up alcohol. He was not, to my knowledge, an alcoholic but would act like a jerk when drunk and his wife had enough of it. He agreed to stop and has been alcohol free for months. When they come over I've not offered anything and have not brought any to their house. My FIL and I have had drinks while he's around but limited.

To the question - with the holidays coming up we will be having different get togethers and I had plans for having some holiday drinks. My wife thinks it's a bad idea but my take is he wasn't an alcoholic and it's not like I'm serving shots and a keg. So, since my wife disagrees I know I'm wrong, but how wrong am I? Do I go ahead with my plans or is that a jerk move?

 

[DropKick]

I don't think you're wrong... but I would go about it low key...

 

[Tom Servo]

Have a private conversation with him. Ask him if he is an alcoholic/going to AA.

If he's in recovery you gotta limit his exposure to temptation. If its to be less of a jerk/health/faith reason, ask him how comfortable he is being around it.

 

[Cliff Clavin]

Him not being able to handle his alcohol is not your problem. Drink away.

 

[Jaysus]

Have holiday drinks

 

[AAABatteries]

Have a private conversation with him. Ask him if he is an alcoholic/going to AA.

If he's in recovery you gotta limit his exposure to temptation. If its to be less of a jerk/health/faith reason, ask him how comfortable he is being around it.

I like this - I have a good enough relationship with him to do so. Just don't want to bring up a sore topic.

 

[AAABatteries]

Him not being able to handle his alcohol is not your problem. Drink away.

This was basically my take but my wife thought I was a little insensitive.

 

[johnnycakes]

Let me ask you this.... what kind of party is it?

Is the focus of the party alcohol and drunkenness?

Or is alcohol simply a part of the party and will non-alcohol choices be available to everyone?

 

[Jutz]

The flask is your friend.

 

[AAABatteries]

Have holiday drinks

"Babe, Jaysus told me it's ok so we are good."

 

[Spin]

Similar situation with my BIL, except his was for health reasons. My sister and mom asked if I wouldn't drink around him because they thought it would be hard for him, even though he wasn't an alcoholic, Doc just told him he had to stop or his liver would fail. When I went to their house for dinner I didn't bring any or mention it. For Thanksgiving at my house I just asked if he'd be fine with us drinking, he said no problem at all.

Best bet, talk to him about it.

 

[AAABatteries]

Let me ask you this.... what kind of party is it?

Is the focus of the party alcohol and drunkenness?

Or is alcohol simply a part of the party and will non-alcohol choices be available to everyone?

Family get togethers - lots of kids at both and it won't be the focus at all.

 

[[icon]]

I have a buddy who's recovering... he came to my BBQfest booth. I still drank.

Folks that have decided to stop drinking understand what they're getting themselves into when they put themselves into social situations that involve drinking.

Now, if this was just two couples and neither of them drank? I'd not drink.

Party... big group....or his wife drinks? No problem.

 

[fdas2]

Is he an UGA fan? THIS IS IMPORTANT

 

[Tom Servo]

Have a private conversation with him. Ask him if he is an alcoholic/going to AA.

If he's in recovery you gotta limit his exposure to temptation. If its to be less of a jerk/health/faith reason, ask him how comfortable he is being around it.

I like this - I have a good enough relationship with him to do so. Just don't want to bring up a sore topic.

Maybe have a separate talk with his wife too so it doesn't look like you're trying to make him relapse.

 

[johnnycakes]

Let me ask you this.... what kind of party is it?

Is the focus of the party alcohol and drunkenness?

Or is alcohol simply a part of the party and will non-alcohol choices be available to everyone?

Family get togethers - lots of kids at both and it won't be the focus at all.

That shouldn't be any problem for a recovering alcoholic to handle.

 

[AAABatteries]

Is he an UGA fan? THIS IS IMPORTANT

the ####### absolutely is. He's a good guy though.

 

[fdas2]

Is he an UGA fan? THIS IS IMPORTANT

the ####### absolutely is. He's a good guy though.

1. GET #### HAMMERED DRUNK

2. BARK IN HIS FACE LIKE AN #######

3. PUNCH HIM

 

[AAABatteries]

Is he an UGA fan? THIS IS IMPORTANT

the ####### absolutely is. He's a good guy though.

1. GET #### HAMMERED DRUNK

2. BARK IN HIS FACE LIKE AN #######

3. PUNCH HIM

 

[Hooper31]

Have a private conversation with him.

Solid. Shows respect.

 

[Henry Ford]

I've never had Etiquette. Is that an absinthe?

 

[Ditka Butkus]

So, earlier this year my BIL gave up alcohol. He was not, to my knowledge, an alcoholic but would act like a jerk when drunk and his wife had enough of it. He agreed to stop and has been alcohol free for months. When they come over I've not offered anything and have not brought any to their house. My FIL and I have had drinks while he's around but limited.

To the question - with the holidays coming up we will be having different get togethers and I had plans for having some holiday drinks. My wife thinks it's a bad idea but my take is he wasn't an alcoholic and it's not like I'm serving shots and a keg. So, since my wife disagrees I know I'm wrong, but how wrong am I? Do I go ahead with my plans or is that a jerk move?

I don't think you are responsible for his behavior, he is an adult....Drink up and enjoy your life, its the only one you get.

 

[VA703]

acting like a jerk to his wife when drunk just reveals underlying issues with their relationship. I bet they either divorce in the next 2 years or he beats her regularly.

 

[Quez]

If you are drinking liquor it's probably pretty easy to be low key about it.

 

[McGarnicle]

Most people drink, so he's going to have to deal with being around it. It's a nice gesture to try not to make him uncomfortable though, so good for you. I say go ahead and drink if that's your preference but don't get #### housed drunk in front of him. It shouldn't be a big deal to have a few around him. If it is, then he's the one who needs to alter his social engagements and avoid situations with alcohol. That's not going to be a viable strategy over the long term though, so he'll need to learn how to deal.

 

[Deranged Hermit]

As a person who has been around alcoholism all my life (my father, two uncles, cousin are all off the booze), here's my take:

Nothing you do short of holding him down and pouring beer down his throat will 'make' him drink. He's an adult and has access to alcohol pretty much anytime he wants it. You and the family having a few won't force him to do anything, if he's too weak not to drink that's on him.

My Dad is an alcoholic. He quit when I was seven or eight when my Mom told him it was the Vodka or us and hasn't had a drink since. He has/had zero problems being around it as both my brother, mom and I drink around him all the time at functions.

It's about maturity and willpower. You have it or you don't.

 

[Ditkaless Wonders]

I had dinner last night with a young woman. Shanahan's Steakhouse to be precise. I did not drink alcohol, the reason being it is the holidays, checkpoints are out, even if I did not drink to legally relevant levels the odor would be some indicia that would prolong my exposure to Cops were I stopped, and in my employment that would be unacceptable for many reasons.

The young woman I was with ordered a bottle of wine for herself. How she conducts herself is her own business, though I will note that she drove there and was planning on driving herself home afterwards. She consumed the bottle over the course of a two hour dinner. She is slightly built so it is likely that she was close to, or over the legal limit for driving at some point during the meal or during the next hour after, i.e. during her drive. I did offer to drive her or to pay for a cab. She declined.

Now here's the thing, her tentative plan for after dinner, which I learned of over dinner conversation, included attending an A.A. meeting.

 

[Dentist]

I had dinner last night with a young woman. Shanahan's Steakhouse to be precise. I did not drink alcohol, the reason being it is the holidays, checkpoints are out, even if I did not drink to legally relevant levels the odor would be some indicia that would prolong my exposure to Cops were I stopped, and in my employment that would be unacceptable for many reasons.

The young woman I was with ordered a bottle of wine for herself. How she conducts herself is her own business, though I will note that she drove there and was planning on driving herself home afterwards. She consumed the bottle over the course of a two hour dinner. She is slightly built so it is likely that she was close to, or over the legal limit for driving at some point during the meal or during the next hour after, i.e. during her drive. I did offer to drive her or to pay for a cab. She declined.

Now here's the thing, her tentative plan for after dinner, which I learned of over dinner conversation, included attending an A.A. meeting.

how big were her breasts?

 

[massraider]

I had dinner last night with a young woman. Shanahan's Steakhouse to be precise. I did not drink alcohol, the reason being it is the holidays, checkpoints are out, even if I did not drink to legally relevant levels the odor would be some indicia that would prolong my exposure to Cops were I stopped, and in my employment that would be unacceptable for many reasons.

The young woman I was with ordered a bottle of wine for herself. How she conducts herself is her own business, though I will note that she drove there and was planning on driving herself home afterwards. She consumed the bottle over the course of a two hour dinner. She is slightly built so it is likely that she was close to, or over the legal limit for driving at some point during the meal or during the next hour after, i.e. during her drive. I did offer to drive her or to pay for a cab. She declined.

Now here's the thing, her tentative plan for after dinner, which I learned of over dinner conversation, included attending an A.A. meeting.

This relationship has potential.

 

[AAABatteries]

I've never had Etiquette. Is that an absinthe?

It's delicious, ask your local liquor store owner about it.

 

[AAABatteries]

Now here's the thing, her tentative plan for after dinner, which I learned of over dinner conversation, included attending an A.A. meeting.

Wow, that's crazy. Feel bad for her - in my situation I really don't think he's an alcoholic just can't handle drinking.

 

[Ditkaless Wonders]

I had dinner last night with a young woman. Shanahan's Steakhouse to be precise. I did not drink alcohol, the reason being it is the holidays, checkpoints are out, even if I did not drink to legally relevant levels the odor would be some indicia that would prolong my exposure to Cops were I stopped, and in my employment that would be unacceptable for many reasons.

The young woman I was with ordered a bottle of wine for herself. How she conducts herself is her own business, though I will note that she drove there and was planning on driving herself home afterwards. She consumed the bottle over the course of a two hour dinner. She is slightly built so it is likely that she was close to, or over the legal limit for driving at some point during the meal or during the next hour after, i.e. during her drive. I did offer to drive her or to pay for a cab. She declined.

Now here's the thing, her tentative plan for after dinner, which I learned of over dinner conversation, included attending an A.A. meeting.

how big were her breasts?

She appears to have unusually small breasts for a person her age. She has extraordinary legs and an ### that can rival any in the yoga pants thread, but she is small breasted to be certain.

 

[Ditkaless Wonders]

I had dinner last night with a young woman. Shanahan's Steakhouse to be precise. I did not drink alcohol, the reason being it is the holidays, checkpoints are out, even if I did not drink to legally relevant levels the odor would be some indicia that would prolong my exposure to Cops were I stopped, and in my employment that would be unacceptable for many reasons.

The young woman I was with ordered a bottle of wine for herself. How she conducts herself is her own business, though I will note that she drove there and was planning on driving herself home afterwards. She consumed the bottle over the course of a two hour dinner. She is slightly built so it is likely that she was close to, or over the legal limit for driving at some point during the meal or during the next hour after, i.e. during her drive. I did offer to drive her or to pay for a cab. She declined.

Now here's the thing, her tentative plan for after dinner, which I learned of over dinner conversation, included attending an A.A. meeting.

This relationship has potential.

There is no relationship. We are acquainted, little more. I am older than her father.

 

[Apple Jack]

Now here's the thing, her tentative plan for after dinner, which I learned of over dinner conversation, included attending an A.A. meeting.

Wow, that's crazy. Feel bad for her - in my situation I really don't think he's an alcoholic just can't handle drinking.

A lightweight is manageable. A lightweight and a jerk, not so much. No way you should have your holiday enjoyment altered because this guy is a jerk.

 

[Apple Jack]

I had dinner last night with a young woman. Shanahan's Steakhouse to be precise. I did not drink alcohol, the reason being it is the holidays, checkpoints are out, even if I did not drink to legally relevant levels the odor would be some indicia that would prolong my exposure to Cops were I stopped, and in my employment that would be unacceptable for many reasons.

The young woman I was with ordered a bottle of wine for herself. How she conducts herself is her own business, though I will note that she drove there and was planning on driving herself home afterwards. She consumed the bottle over the course of a two hour dinner. She is slightly built so it is likely that she was close to, or over the legal limit for driving at some point during the meal or during the next hour after, i.e. during her drive. I did offer to drive her or to pay for a cab. She declined.

Now here's the thing, her tentative plan for after dinner, which I learned of over dinner conversation, included attending an A.A. meeting.

Wow.

Also, this is what cabs and subways are for.

 

[Tom Servo]

I had dinner last night with a young woman. Shanahan's Steakhouse to be precise. I did not drink alcohol, the reason being it is the holidays, checkpoints are out, even if I did not drink to legally relevant levels the odor would be some indicia that would prolong my exposure to Cops were I stopped, and in my employment that would be unacceptable for many reasons.

The young woman I was with ordered a bottle of wine for herself. How she conducts herself is her own business, though I will note that she drove there and was planning on driving herself home afterwards. She consumed the bottle over the course of a two hour dinner. She is slightly built so it is likely that she was close to, or over the legal limit for driving at some point during the meal or during the next hour after, i.e. during her drive. I did offer to drive her or to pay for a cab. She declined.

Now here's the thing, her tentative plan for after dinner, which I learned of over dinner conversation, included attending an A.A. meeting.

This relationship has potential.

There is no relationship. We are acquainted, little more. I am older than her father.

This sounds sophisticated.

 

[Josie Maran]

I had dinner last night with a young woman. Shanahan's Steakhouse to be precise. I did not drink alcohol, the reason being it is the holidays, checkpoints are out, even if I did not drink to legally relevant levels the odor would be some indicia that would prolong my exposure to Cops were I stopped, and in my employment that would be unacceptable for many reasons.

The young woman I was with ordered a bottle of wine for herself. How she conducts herself is her own business, though I will note that she drove there and was planning on driving herself home afterwards. She consumed the bottle over the course of a two hour dinner. She is slightly built so it is likely that she was close to, or over the legal limit for driving at some point during the meal or during the next hour after, i.e. during her drive. I did offer to drive her or to pay for a cab. She declined.

Now here's the thing, her tentative plan for after dinner, which I learned of over dinner conversation, included attending an A.A. meeting.

how big were her breasts?

She appears to have unusually small breasts for a person her age. She has extraordinary legs and an ### that can rival any in the yoga pants thread, but she is small breasted to be certain.

 

[Josie Maran]

I had dinner last night with a young woman. Shanahan's Steakhouse to be precise. I did not drink alcohol, the reason being it is the holidays, checkpoints are out, even if I did not drink to legally relevant levels the odor would be some indicia that would prolong my exposure to Cops were I stopped, and in my employment that would be unacceptable for many reasons.

The young woman I was with ordered a bottle of wine for herself. How she conducts herself is her own business, though I will note that she drove there and was planning on driving herself home afterwards. She consumed the bottle over the course of a two hour dinner. She is slightly built so it is likely that she was close to, or over the legal limit for driving at some point during the meal or during the next hour after, i.e. during her drive. I did offer to drive her or to pay for a cab. She declined.

Now here's the thing, her tentative plan for after dinner, which I learned of over dinner conversation, included attending an A.A. meeting.

This relationship has potential.

There is no relationship. We are acquainted, little more. I am older than her father.

 

[johnnycakes]

Now here's the thing, her tentative plan for after dinner, which I learned of over dinner conversation, included attending an A.A. meeting.

Maybe she's just a tourist.

 

[MAC_32]

My brother is an alcoholic, not sure how long he's been sober and how many setbacks he's had but the better part of a decade and probably more.

I was very clear with him that his presence won't impact our alcohol intake around the holidays. Whether he's there or not we will be drinking most of the evening. I want to spend some time with him but if he can't handle it that is his call and he must remove himself from the situation.

 

[avoiding injuries]

Just don't flaunt it.

 

[trogg78]

My brother is an alcoholic, not sure how long he's been sober and how many setbacks he's had but the better part of a decade and probably more.

I was very clear with him that his presence won't impact our alcohol intake around the holidays. Whether he's there or not we will be drinking most of the evening. I want to spend some time with him but if he can't handle it that is his call and he must remove himself from the situation.

And the Brother of the year award goes to....

 

[Guest]

Sleep with his wife.

You guys are slipping.

 

[massraider]

I had dinner last night with a young woman. Shanahan's Steakhouse to be precise. I did not drink alcohol, the reason being it is the holidays, checkpoints are out, even if I did not drink to legally relevant levels the odor would be some indicia that would prolong my exposure to Cops were I stopped, and in my employment that would be unacceptable for many reasons.

The young woman I was with ordered a bottle of wine for herself. How she conducts herself is her own business, though I will note that she drove there and was planning on driving herself home afterwards. She consumed the bottle over the course of a two hour dinner. She is slightly built so it is likely that she was close to, or over the legal limit for driving at some point during the meal or during the next hour after, i.e. during her drive. I did offer to drive her or to pay for a cab. She declined.

Now here's the thing, her tentative plan for after dinner, which I learned of over dinner conversation, included attending an A.A. meeting.

This relationship has potential.

There is no relationship. We are acquainted, little more. I am older than her father.

Oh. Too bad there aren't any women with daddy issues, you might have a shot.

 

[Henry Ford]

I had dinner last night with a young woman. Shanahan's Steakhouse to be precise. I did not drink alcohol, the reason being it is the holidays, checkpoints are out, even if I did not drink to legally relevant levels the odor would be some indicia that would prolong my exposure to Cops were I stopped, and in my employment that would be unacceptable for many reasons.

The young woman I was with ordered a bottle of wine for herself. How she conducts herself is her own business, though I will note that she drove there and was planning on driving herself home afterwards. She consumed the bottle over the course of a two hour dinner. She is slightly built so it is likely that she was close to, or over the legal limit for driving at some point during the meal or during the next hour after, i.e. during her drive. I did offer to drive her or to pay for a cab. She declined.

Now here's the thing, her tentative plan for after dinner, which I learned of over dinner conversation, included attending an A.A. meeting.

This relationship has potential.

There is no relationship. We are acquainted, little more. I am older than her father.

Oh. Too bad there aren't any women with daddy issues, you might have a shot.

Especially alcoholics.

 

[Ditkaless Wonders]

I had dinner last night with a young woman. Shanahan's Steakhouse to be precise. I did not drink alcohol, the reason being it is the holidays, checkpoints are out, even if I did not drink to legally relevant levels the odor would be some indicia that would prolong my exposure to Cops were I stopped, and in my employment that would be unacceptable for many reasons.

The young woman I was with ordered a bottle of wine for herself. How she conducts herself is her own business, though I will note that she drove there and was planning on driving herself home afterwards. She consumed the bottle over the course of a two hour dinner. She is slightly built so it is likely that she was close to, or over the legal limit for driving at some point during the meal or during the next hour after, i.e. during her drive. I did offer to drive her or to pay for a cab. She declined.

Now here's the thing, her tentative plan for after dinner, which I learned of over dinner conversation, included attending an A.A. meeting.

This relationship has potential.

There is no relationship. We are acquainted, little more. I am older than her father.

Oh. Too bad there aren't any women with daddy issues, you might have a shot.

Especially alcoholics.

It may help your minds run wild to know that she is a stripper and that 15 years ago I prosecuted her father and that he remains in jail to this day with a release date in seven more years.

 

[Josie Maran]

I had dinner last night with a young woman. Shanahan's Steakhouse to be precise. I did not drink alcohol, the reason being it is the holidays, checkpoints are out, even if I did not drink to legally relevant levels the odor would be some indicia that would prolong my exposure to Cops were I stopped, and in my employment that would be unacceptable for many reasons.

The young woman I was with ordered a bottle of wine for herself. How she conducts herself is her own business, though I will note that she drove there and was planning on driving herself home afterwards. She consumed the bottle over the course of a two hour dinner. She is slightly built so it is likely that she was close to, or over the legal limit for driving at some point during the meal or during the next hour after, i.e. during her drive. I did offer to drive her or to pay for a cab. She declined.

Now here's the thing, her tentative plan for after dinner, which I learned of over dinner conversation, included attending an A.A. meeting.

This relationship has potential.

There is no relationship. We are acquainted, little more. I am older than her father.

Oh. Too bad there aren't any women with daddy issues, you might have a shot.

Especially alcoholics.

It may help your minds run wild to know that she is a stripper and that 15 years ago I prosecuted her father and that he remains in jail to this day with a release date in seven more years.

If you don't sex her furiously, I will hurt you.

 

[Dentist]

I had dinner last night with a young woman. Shanahan's Steakhouse to be precise. I did not drink alcohol, the reason being it is the holidays, checkpoints are out, even if I did not drink to legally relevant levels the odor would be some indicia that would prolong my exposure to Cops were I stopped, and in my employment that would be unacceptable for many reasons.

The young woman I was with ordered a bottle of wine for herself. How she conducts herself is her own business, though I will note that she drove there and was planning on driving herself home afterwards. She consumed the bottle over the course of a two hour dinner. She is slightly built so it is likely that she was close to, or over the legal limit for driving at some point during the meal or during the next hour after, i.e. during her drive. I did offer to drive her or to pay for a cab. She declined.

Now here's the thing, her tentative plan for after dinner, which I learned of over dinner conversation, included attending an A.A. meeting.

how big were her breasts?

She appears to have unusually small breasts for a person her age. She has extraordinary legs and an ### that can rival any in the yoga pants thread, but she is small breasted to be certain.

I wouldn't ever call her again then.

 

[MAC_32]

My brother is an alcoholic, not sure how long he's been sober and how many setbacks he's had but the better part of a decade and probably more.

I was very clear with him that his presence won't impact our alcohol intake around the holidays. Whether he's there or not we will be drinking most of the evening. I want to spend some time with him but if he can't handle it that is his call and he must remove himself from the situation.

And the Brother of the year award goes to....

as far as I know he has handled it fine, his business keeps him around drugs and alcohol pretty frequently so if he can't do it around family then he can't do it in business either. He needed to figure it out, would rather him figure that out around us than on his own then end up in the slammer again.

 

[Henry Ford]

I had dinner last night with a young woman. Shanahan's Steakhouse to be precise. I did not drink alcohol, the reason being it is the holidays, checkpoints are out, even if I did not drink to legally relevant levels the odor would be some indicia that would prolong my exposure to Cops were I stopped, and in my employment that would be unacceptable for many reasons.

The young woman I was with ordered a bottle of wine for herself. How she conducts herself is her own business, though I will note that she drove there and was planning on driving herself home afterwards. She consumed the bottle over the course of a two hour dinner. She is slightly built so it is likely that she was close to, or over the legal limit for driving at some point during the meal or during the next hour after, i.e. during her drive. I did offer to drive her or to pay for a cab. She declined.

Now here's the thing, her tentative plan for after dinner, which I learned of over dinner conversation, included attending an A.A. meeting.

This relationship has potential.

There is no relationship. We are acquainted, little more. I am older than her father.

Oh. Too bad there aren't any women with daddy issues, you might have a shot.

Especially alcoholics.

It may help your minds run wild to know that she is a stripper and that 15 years ago I prosecuted her father and that he remains in jail to this day with a release date in seven more years.

Little did he know this was all a plot to get her father's conviction overturned...