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If you could have a super power, what would it be? (1 Viewer)

Mind control is good.

I would like a variation of the Midas touch: Whoever I touch would instantly become completely under my control. Do anything I want.

 
Ditkaless Wonders said:
What do I give a damn about what she wants. I would not be a place of public accommodation, having to serve any and all who approach me. No doubt also that I would have all the money I would ever need from the clients I choose to work with. Exploitation of female vanity would make me rich beyond my wildest dreams, and really, what would I need with money, all my needs would be gratefully supplied gratis.
Click to expand...
I feel like you'd be a prime candidate to be kidnapped by some evil genius though, especially if you were being stingy with the Ditk Juice. You could be locked up and milked by a machine or worse. You have no real super powers to defend yourself.

 
Fat Nick said:
Ditkaless Wonders said:
What do I give a damn about what she wants. I would not be a place of public accommodation, having to serve any and all who approach me. No doubt also that I would have all the money I would ever need from the clients I choose to work with. Exploitation of female vanity would make me rich beyond my wildest dreams, and really, what would I need with money, all my needs would be gratefully supplied gratis.
Click to expand...
I feel like you'd be a prime candidate to be kidnapped by some evil genius though, especially if you were being stingy with the Ditk Juice. You could be locked up and milked by a machine or worse. You have no real super powers to defend yourself.
Click to expand...
:lmao:

THIS ISN"T WHAT I HAD IN MIND!!!!11111!!!!!!

 
So, I'm something of a voyeur...I love getting a glimpse of something a woman inadvertently shows, that otherwise she wouldn't knowingly expose. Like a glimpse of the undies down the back of the pants/shorts when they squat down to get a look at something on the bottom shelf at the grocery store, get out of a car wearing a short skirt, etc...

...having the ability to see through women's clothes would save a lot of energy spent casually maneuvering around to get a sneaky peek.

 
Fat Nick said:
Ditkaless Wonders said:
What do I give a damn about what she wants. I would not be a place of public accommodation, having to serve any and all who approach me. No doubt also that I would have all the money I would ever need from the clients I choose to work with. Exploitation of female vanity would make me rich beyond my wildest dreams, and really, what would I need with money, all my needs would be gratefully supplied gratis.
Click to expand...
I feel like you'd be a prime candidate to be kidnapped by some evil genius though, especially if you were being stingy with the Ditk Juice. You could be locked up and milked by a machine or worse. You have no real super powers to defend yourself.
Click to expand...
The clamor for my release would be resounding. Charlie's Angels, the Fox Force Five girls, Bill's Deadly Viper Assignation Squad, Ronda Rousey, and any male politician or general who feared his mistress becoming frumpy would all rally to my aid. I'd be fine.

Also, let's not presume out of hand that I would object to the milking machine.

 
Last edited by a moderator:
nittanylion said:
So, I'm something of a voyeur...I love getting a glimpse of something a woman inadvertently shows, that otherwise she wouldn't knowingly expose. Like a glimpse of the undies down the back of the pants/shorts when they squat down to get a look at something on the bottom shelf at the grocery store, get out of a car wearing a short skirt, etc...

...having the ability to see through women's clothes would save a lot of energy spent casually maneuvering around to get a sneaky peek.
Click to expand...
Some things are left better unsaid.

 
Fat Nick said:
Ditkaless Wonders said:
What do I give a damn about what she wants. I would not be a place of public accommodation, having to serve any and all who approach me. No doubt also that I would have all the money I would ever need from the clients I choose to work with. Exploitation of female vanity would make me rich beyond my wildest dreams, and really, what would I need with money, all my needs would be gratefully supplied gratis.
Click to expand...
I feel like you'd be a prime candidate to be kidnapped by some evil genius though, especially if you were being stingy with the Ditk Juice. You could be locked up and milked by a machine or worse. You have no real super powers to defend yourself.
Click to expand...
Lets also not forget that Lois Lane, Sue Storm, Mary Jane Parker, Wonder Woman, and even Buffy the Vampire Slayer would need a tune up from time to time. I would have plenty of actual superheroes rallying to my cause.

 
Hastur said:
Ditkaless Wonders said:
Fountain of youth penis. Any woman who gets some automatically is physically reduced in age 5 to 10% and increases her physical fitness by 1 to 4%.
Click to expand...
So, you want a long line of old, overweight women waiting to bang you? You might want to rethink this...
Click to expand...
Let them wait, plenty of young hotties would be lining up, panicing at the first signs of aging and willing to pay well to avoid that.

 
Ditkaless Wonders said:
Fat Nick said:
Ditkaless Wonders said:
What do I give a damn about what she wants. I would not be a place of public accommodation, having to serve any and all who approach me. No doubt also that I would have all the money I would ever need from the clients I choose to work with. Exploitation of female vanity would make me rich beyond my wildest dreams, and really, what would I need with money, all my needs would be gratefully supplied gratis.
Click to expand...
I feel like you'd be a prime candidate to be kidnapped by some evil genius though, especially if you were being stingy with the Ditk Juice. You could be locked up and milked by a machine or worse. You have no real super powers to defend yourself.
Click to expand...
The clamor for my release would be resounding. Charlie's Angels, the Fox Force Five girls, Bill's Deadly Viper Assignation Squad, Ronda Rousey, and any male politician or general who feared his mistress becoming frumpy would all rally to my aid. I'd be fine.

Also, let's not presume out of hand that I would object to the milking machine.
Click to expand...
:lmao: :lmao: :lmao: I like how thoroughly you've thought this through.

 
Ditkaless Wonders said:
sharptongued1 said:
Ditkaless Wonders said:
sharptongued1 said:
Ditkaless Wonders said:
Fat Nick said:
Ditkaless Wonders said:
Fat Nick said:
Ditkaless Wonders said:
Fountain of youth penis. Any woman who gets some automatically is physically reduced in age 5 to 10% and increases her physical fitness by 1 to 4%.
Click to expand...
Ditkaless Wonders' response in 12 years when asked why he chose that super power:

I picked the super power 12 years ago when I was excited about it, and proud of it.

Since Then the entire system and tons of people have screwed me, ruined it and made me hate it and society as a whole
Click to expand...
Click to expand...
More like, "Christy, I know you hate looking almost 30, but I already have appointments with Brooklyn and Adrianna this weekend. The only way I could fit this in is if you were willing to double up with one of them, and I'd hate to do this to Christy Brinkley but I would have to charge you double my regular rate." "Anyhow, call Ms. Lima or Ms. Decker's people and see if either of them is amenable, otherwise you will have to wait, next week is booked solid with Ms. Anniston, Ms. Bullock, Ms. Cruz, Ms. Saldano, and half the Sports illustrated swimsuit models who all want a bit of help before their photo shoots for the magazine get underway." "Hell, I'm still trying to figure out how to work Ms. Jolie into the schedule and Selena Gomez's people are offering me triple my rate if I could just find a way to get to her." "Maybe halftime at the Packer's game, but no promises."
Click to expand...
I guess if the magic was in the sauce, you could just bottle it, brand it as "Ditk Juice," and sell it to those you didn't want to have "appointments" for. I mean...maybe Rosie O'Donnell wants to get younger too...
Click to expand...
What do I give a damn about what she wants. I would not be a place of public accommodation, having to serve any and all who approach me. No doubt also that I would have all the money I would ever need from the clients I choose to work with. Exploitation of female vanity would make me rich beyond my wildest dreams, and really, what would I need with money, all my needs would be gratefully supplied gratis.
Click to expand...
Or dead from one of their not-too-happy-about-the-situation spouses. Also, can you screw yourself to keep yourself young?
Click to expand...
Really, Brad Pitt would be angry at me for turning the clock back on Angelia 15 years? Hell, I'd think he would be making the appointment.
Click to expand...
Not necessarliy Pitt specifically; but it only takes one.
Click to expand...
How would he get past my slavishly devoted Rhonda Rousey bodyguard?
Click to expand...
Sweep the leg.

 
DW - Some questions:

With your super-power, would you undertake "restoration projects?"

Like...if Chloris Leachman came to you and wanted to bang it out till she was young again, would you do it?

Also, do you think you could bang Caitlyn Jenner back to Bruce?

 
Fat Nick said:
DW - Some questions:

With your super-power, would you undertake "restoration projects?"

Like...if Chloris Leachman came to you and wanted to bang it out till she was young again, would you do it?

Also, do you think you could bang Caitlyn Jenner back to Bruce?
Click to expand...
Chloris Leachman-no. Racquel Welch, Sophia Loren, or Ann Margret - with the help of fluffers sure, it would be a useful public service, sort of like the folks who restore the works of the masters, you know, like the guys working the Sistine Chapel. As to the Jenner question, the answer would be no. I wouldn't and couldn't. Whether the power might work, who knows, it just wouldn't work for me since there is still the performance aspect. Even fluffers could not get me going if I knew the end game was Jenner.

 
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Ditkaless Wonders said:
Fountain of youth penis. Any woman who gets some automatically is physically reduced in age 5 to 10% and increases her physical fitness by 1 to 4%.
Click to expand...
Great idea until you think about the possibility of being kidnapped by a horde of fatties. Once the horde of fatties become fit and respectable, they rent you out to other fatties. All you are is a fatty fixing ####er.

Now if you have mind control you have the same ability but you get to pick and choose and you cannot be kidnapped and made to #### fatties.

 
I always told my wife that my ability on Heroes would be the ability to hold an egg in my hand and hard boil it.

 
Last edited by a moderator:
Fat Nick said:
Ditkaless Wonders said:
What do I give a damn about what she wants. I would not be a place of public accommodation, having to serve any and all who approach me. No doubt also that I would have all the money I would ever need from the clients I choose to work with. Exploitation of female vanity would make me rich beyond my wildest dreams, and really, what would I need with money, all my needs would be gratefully supplied gratis.
Click to expand...
I feel like you'd be a prime candidate to be kidnapped by some evil genius though, especially if you were being stingy with the Ditk Juice. You could be locked up and milked by a machine or worse. You have no real super powers to defend yourself.
Click to expand...
Reminds me of this

http://youtu.be/9m9Fv9O6AnU

And this

http://youtu.be/PLDGoEh7jqA

 
Dikta is kiling it in this thread.

My power would be mind reading. Mind control would probably get you in trouble after a while when a victim realizes what you did, but mind reading should give you the keys to the kingdom with a little work.

 
Ditkaless Wonders said:
Fat Nick said:
DW - Some questions:

With your super-power, would you undertake "restoration projects?"

Like...if Chloris Leachman came to you and wanted to bang it out till she was young again, would you do it?

Also, do you think you could bang Caitlyn Jenner back to Bruce?
Click to expand...
Chloris Leachman-no. Racquel Welch, Sophia Loren, or Ann Margret - with the help of fluffers sure, it would be a useful public service, sort of like the folks who restore the works of the masters, you know, like the guys working the Sistine Chapel. As to the Jenner question, the answer would be no. I wouldn't and couldn't. Whether the power might work, who knows, it just wouldn't work for me since there is still the performance aspect. Even fluffers could not get me going if I knew the end game was Jenner.
Click to expand...
I think the simple solution to this would be that part of their contract would be a follow up appointment in their prime.

 
Dan Lambskin said:
Fat Nick said:
Ditkaless Wonders said:
What do I give a damn about what she wants. I would not be a place of public accommodation, having to serve any and all who approach me. No doubt also that I would have all the money I would ever need from the clients I choose to work with. Exploitation of female vanity would make me rich beyond my wildest dreams, and really, what would I need with money, all my needs would be gratefully supplied gratis.
Click to expand...
I feel like you'd be a prime candidate to be kidnapped by some evil genius though, especially if you were being stingy with the Ditk Juice. You could be locked up and milked by a machine or worse. You have no real super powers to defend yourself.
Click to expand...
Reminds me of this

http://youtu.be/9m9Fv9O6AnU

And this

http://youtu.be/PLDGoEh7jqA
Click to expand...
Kind of afraid to click on these at work...

 
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