"If you love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, its yo (1 Viewer)

[Hipple Long Ware & Peete]

That is because famous people have money and have been advised by attorneys how best to protect your rights when you are pulled over in such a situation.

They NEED evidence to convict you. Now if you have pissed yourself and have a fifth of jack between your legs then refusing ain;t gonna save you. But if you are pulled over for a minor traffic violation and don't give them the evidence (BAC or FST's) then all they have to prove beyond all reasonable doubt that you were DUi is your driving, and ability to silently exit the car and walk to the police cruiser (assuming you stay quiet through the trip and don't vomit in the backseat). Usually that is not enough to prove beyond all reasonable doubt that you were DUI as there are many reasons someone would speed/swerve/fail to signal /whatever the reason you were pulled over was other than being drunk.

If you were to go this route, do you tell the officer that you are using your right to remain silent or are you supposed to just remain mute and compliant? Is a random LEO going to know to give you directions to follow is do you risk having questions screamed at you the entire time?

I have a pre-printed statement on the back of my business cards that spells this all out and advise my clients to say "my statement is on the back of that card. Other than that I'd like to go, and invoke my right to remain silent (I also say this through a cracked window and with 1-2 cigarettes burning (to decrease the 'i smelled a strong odor of alcohol emanating from the vehicle" attack) in the car and while looking straight ahead not at the officer (cut down on the possibilities for slurring, breathing in the officers directions,not allowing him to get a good look at your eyes etc) The less you say the better. But if you say NOTHING at all they might try and make you seem confused/unable to comprehend what is going on. The passing of the card and brief conveying of that pre-printed statement beats that back.

 

[Hipple Long Ware & Peete]

That is because famous people have money and have been advised by attorneys how best to protect your rights when you are pulled over in such a situation.

They NEED evidence to convict you. Now if you have pissed yourself and have a fifth of jack between your legs then refusing ain;t gonna save you. But if you are pulled over for a minor traffic violation and don't give them the evidence (BAC or FST's) then all they have to prove beyond all reasonable doubt that you were DUi is your driving, and ability to silently exit the car and walk to the police cruiser (assuming you stay quiet through the trip and don't vomit in the backseat). Usually that is not enough to prove beyond all reasonable doubt that you were DUI as there are many reasons someone would speed/swerve/fail to signal /whatever the reason you were pulled over was other than being drunk.

If you were to go this route, do you tell the officer that you are using your right to remain silent or are you supposed to just remain mute and compliant? Is a random LEO going to know to give you directions to follow is do you risk having questions screamed at you the entire time?

1. Calmly tell the officer first that you don't want to answer any questions without first speaking to an attorney. The officer should then afford you the opportunity to consult with an attorney. If you cannot reach an attorney, any questions regarding whether you are DUI (i.e. have you been drinking, i'd like you to do some field sobriety tests, etc.) should be answered with, "with all respect officer I don't wish to answer that question/don't wish you perform the field sobriety tests/etc." 2.In Arizona, the officer can still ask you questions regarding your identification, but any decent officer should know to respect your fifth amendment requests. However, sometimes an officer will put his questions in the form of an order (like, "i want you to perform some tests for me"). In this instance, ask the officer if he is ordering you to do the tests. If he says yes, ask him if you are free to leave. Never disobey an officer's command, but it is okay to respectfully ask him to clarify.

asking to leave is very important. At that point they have to write your tickets and let you go. If they don't let you go, and continue to ask questions/compile evidence it is quite likely that you can get the stop suppressed under miranda stuff. Since once you ask to leave and they say no, you are under arrest (even if you don't have the cuffs on etc) and any evidence compiled after that point is 'fruit of the poisonous tree".

 

[Hipple Long Ware & Peete]

Almost every "famous" person I've read of who has refused breathalizer/blood testing has gotten off to a lesser charge. If I ever find myself in this situation, and I try like hell to make sure I never do, I'm pleading the 5th and refusing everything.

Depends on where you are. San Antonio is a no-refusal city. Not sure if it is all of Texas, or just the city. Either way, refusal means you get to have your blood drawn in cuffs while being escorted by the nice police officer.

Doesn't it also bump up the charge to a felony?

I've never heard of this. I think it would be unconstitional encroachment on silence/self incrimination, but then again I think that should invalidate the blood draws too.

In some states (Minnesota, for one) it is my understanding it is a felony to refuse the test after arrest. I think you have a good point with the 5th issue, but I'm sure that's been litigated.In most states if you refuse the state can suspend your license for much longer and the cops can still go get a warrant to draw your blood.

I don't think this has worked it's way up to the supremes yet, but it will definitely get there.

 

[Hipple Long Ware & Peete]

Almost every "famous" person I've read of who has refused breathalizer/blood testing has gotten off to a lesser charge. If I ever find myself in this situation, and I try like hell to make sure I never do, I'm pleading the 5th and refusing everything.

Depends on where you are. San Antonio is a no-refusal city. Not sure if it is all of Texas, or just the city. Either way, refusal means you get to have your blood drawn in cuffs while being escorted by the nice police officer.

Doesn't it also bump up the charge to a felony?

I've never heard of this. I think it would be unconstitional encroachment on silence/self incrimination, but then again I think that should invalidate the blood draws too.

In some states (Minnesota, for one) it is my understanding it is a felony to refuse the test after arrest. I think you have a good point with the 5th issue, but I'm sure that's been litigated.In most states if you refuse the state can suspend your license for much longer and the cops can still go get a warrant to draw your blood.

I'm pretty sure in NY you cannot refuse the test (automatic guilty, iirc).

In CA. You can't refuse once ARRESTED. They'll try and trick you into it before arresting you...

They do this all the time in GA mixing the two tests (PBT's and post arrest state test) and will tell you "failure to take this (the PBT) will suspend your license" (which is patently false)

 

[No. 16]

\

Why would it be terrible for me? That's what I don't understand.

May make things worse for her, but on my end what is so bad about it?

It's taking you down a road you shouldn't be heading. I have no problem with revenge/sticking it to her/etc. For awhile. It may not be healthy but damn does it feel good. 6 weeks post-breakup you should be heading further away from that path (worst case holding steady). Contacting them just to "make things worse for her" isn't something that should be in your mindset. It's an unhealthy state of mind. You go down that road and it's going to feed on itself. You're going to keep making excuses to contact her/talk about her (like you're doing now). A year from now and you'll be Asianwoz still talking about the one that got away and settling for some trash while bitterly clinging to something in your past. Start letting go. At the very least stop holding tighter.

I've been wanting to say good bye and thanks since the split. She stopped by my parents place and did the same the day after. The only reason I didn't do it sooner is because she wanted to tell her parents in person. So she asked if I could wait. She was supposed to this weekend, but was afraid/busy banging personal trainer.So this isn't a matter of revenge. I've been wanting to do

it since the beginning for closure/respect. It is only an issue now because she didn't tell her parents as promised. I mean she has been with guy for a whole month. What is she waiting for?

Once I say my good bye to her family, I'll be completely done with her. No reason to continue contacting her (which i didn't until today).

 

[Maude]

\

Why would it be terrible for me? That's what I don't understand.

May make things worse for her, but on my end what is so bad about it?

It's taking you down a road you shouldn't be heading. I have no problem with revenge/sticking it to her/etc. For awhile. It may not be healthy but damn does it feel good. 6 weeks post-breakup you should be heading further away from that path (worst case holding steady). Contacting them just to "make things worse for her" isn't something that should be in your mindset. It's an unhealthy state of mind. You go down that road and it's going to feed on itself. You're going to keep making excuses to contact her/talk about her (like you're doing now). A year from now and you'll be Asianwoz still talking about the one that got away and settling for some trash while bitterly clinging to something in your past. Start letting go. At the very least stop holding tighter.

I've been wanting to say good bye and thanks since the split. She stopped by my parents place and did the same the day after. The only reason I didn't do it sooner is because she wanted to tell her parents in person. So she asked if I could wait. She was supposed to this weekend, but was afraid/busy banging personal trainer.So this isn't a matter of revenge. I've been wanting to do

it since the beginning for closure/respect. It is only an issue now because she didn't tell her parents as promised. I mean she has been with guy for a whole month. What is she waiting for?

Once I say my good bye to her family, I'll be completely done with her. No reason to continue contacting her (which i didn't until today).

How old are you again... 15? You're acting like a big vergina.

 

[thayman]

\

Why would it be terrible for me? That's what I don't understand.

May make things worse for her, but on my end what is so bad about it?

It's taking you down a road you shouldn't be heading. I have no problem with revenge/sticking it to her/etc. For awhile. It may not be healthy but damn does it feel good. 6 weeks post-breakup you should be heading further away from that path (worst case holding steady). Contacting them just to "make things worse for her" isn't something that should be in your mindset. It's an unhealthy state of mind. You go down that road and it's going to feed on itself. You're going to keep making excuses to contact her/talk about her (like you're doing now). A year from now and you'll be Asianwoz still talking about the one that got away and settling for some trash while bitterly clinging to something in your past. Start letting go. At the very least stop holding tighter.

I've been wanting to say good bye and thanks since the split. She stopped by my parents place and did the same the day after. The only reason I didn't do it sooner is because she wanted to tell her parents in person. So she asked if I could wait. She was supposed to this weekend, but was afraid/busy banging personal trainer.So this isn't a matter of revenge. I've been wanting to do

it since the beginning for closure/respect. It is only an issue now because she didn't tell her parents as promised. I mean she has been with guy for a whole month. What is she waiting for?

Once I say my good bye to her family, I'll be completely done with her. No reason to continue contacting her (which i didn't until today).

My god you are a donkey. You have been given some amazing advice in this thread and keep doing the opposite, don't call her family. Odds are they already know and she just doesn't want you around them since she dumped you.

 

[flranger]

\

Why would it be terrible for me? That's what I don't understand.

May make things worse for her, but on my end what is so bad about it?

It's taking you down a road you shouldn't be heading. I have no problem with revenge/sticking it to her/etc. For awhile. It may not be healthy but damn does it feel good. 6 weeks post-breakup you should be heading further away from that path (worst case holding steady). Contacting them just to "make things worse for her" isn't something that should be in your mindset. It's an unhealthy state of mind. You go down that road and it's going to feed on itself. You're going to keep making excuses to contact her/talk about her (like you're doing now). A year from now and you'll be Asianwoz still talking about the one that got away and settling for some trash while bitterly clinging to something in your past. Start letting go. At the very least stop holding tighter.

I've been wanting to say good bye and thanks since the split. She stopped by my parents place and did the same the day after. The only reason I didn't do it sooner is because she wanted to tell her parents in person. So she asked if I could wait. She was supposed to this weekend, but was afraid/busy banging personal trainer.So this isn't a matter of revenge. I've been wanting to do

it since the beginning for closure/respect. It is only an issue now because she didn't tell her parents as promised. I mean she has been with guy for a whole month. What is she waiting for?

Once I say my good bye to her family, I'll be completely done with her. No reason to continue contacting her (which i didn't until today).

Dude, as my grandma used to always say: "It's her story to tell". Don't be a ########, it is her parents, not yours.

 

[IvanKaramazov]

I'll take her word for it. She's not one to pull punches and she's closer to the ex than me. Two weeks ago when dude came up here she said he was a "nice guy." After spending more time with him this past weekend she changed her description to "he's a scrub."Anyone have any idea why the ex hasn't told her parents yet? Her sister told me she lied and told them I went with her to Hawaii too! Anyways, I told her to tell her parents tonight, because tomorrow I'm going to call no matter what to say my goodbye and thank you to them for treating me so well the past 7 years. After that I'll be completely done with her.

This definitely sounds like somebody who's completely over it and has moved on with his life.

 

[The Hank]

After that I'll be completely done with her.

Are you? You really need to step back and think about what you want and what it may or may not be worth to you. Your life is still revolving around this girl. You've literally been self destructive over losing her and now you're going to be vindictive over her distress. Decide what's best for you and go from there, and quit with the dramatizations. Maybe you're done; maybe you're not--but you need to get off this wave of emotion you're riding and try to assess just what it is that you want going forward from here.

Yep. This is the last order of business for me regarding her. Going through the DUI really put my problems into perspective. Why was I throwing away everything for someone who doesn't give a #### about me? I treated her well and she screwed me. So I'm done with her. There's plenty of other girls out there.

Once I say bye to her family that will be it, because I really don't want to be with her anymore. She didn't appreciate all I did and I know I deserve better. I'm a good guy, have a great family, great career, and I'm not ugly. When I was with her there were plenty of girls who were interested in me, but I sayed faithful. Since, I've been going out I've had no problem talking to girls. So it's only a matter of time until I find the one. Until then I'll try and bang as many women as my drivers license permits.

Well... if you want to get technical about it she was actually screwing the personal trainer

 

[Ned]

\

Why would it be terrible for me? That's what I don't understand.

May make things worse for her, but on my end what is so bad about it?

It's taking you down a road you shouldn't be heading. I have no problem with revenge/sticking it to her/etc. For awhile. It may not be healthy but damn does it feel good. 6 weeks post-breakup you should be heading further away from that path (worst case holding steady). Contacting them just to "make things worse for her" isn't something that should be in your mindset. It's an unhealthy state of mind. You go down that road and it's going to feed on itself. You're going to keep making excuses to contact her/talk about her (like you're doing now). A year from now and you'll be Asianwoz still talking about the one that got away and settling for some trash while bitterly clinging to something in your past. Start letting go. At the very least stop holding tighter.

I've been wanting to say good bye and thanks since the split. She stopped by my parents place and did the same the day after. The only reason I didn't do it sooner is because she wanted to tell her parents in person. So she asked if I could wait. She was supposed to this weekend, but was afraid/busy banging personal trainer.So this isn't a matter of revenge. I've been wanting to do

it since the beginning for closure/respect. It is only an issue now because she didn't tell her parents as promised. I mean she has been with guy for a whole month. What is she waiting for?

Once I say my good bye to her family, I'll be completely done with her. No reason to continue contacting her (which i didn't until today).

You're justifying another stupid decision just like you did with the Vegas trip.Might as well pregame it and head over there half sauced so you're loose and can speak freely. </sarcasm>

 

[gianmarco]

Once again, an OVERWHELMING response to not do what you're about to do. In fact, the response has so far been unanimous. Yet our "hero" keeps trying to justify it and explain how he's been wanting to say goodbye to his almost parents-in-law for so long now and his ex better get with the program and tell them because he simply has to get this done. Just to say thank you, of course.

Oof.

 

[jamny]

How many levels of closure do you need? Just the fact that you are even thinking of doing this 6 weeks later shows that you haven't moved on yet.

 

[Godsbrother]

Now your being a #### 16. Guess what, her parents may really like you but they LOVE her. Period. saying 'good bye' to them will be a feather in her hat and make the parents think your weird. Your life has fallen apart since the breakup yet you say your over her, no your not at least not by your behavior. Let her go and don't be that weird guy who says goodbye to the folks cuz they really don't care about you. Sorry. V

Don't call her parents. Take it from a father with a daughter -- we might think a boyfriend is great but once there is a breakup the guy ceases to exist. If an ex-boyfriend calls we immediately think the guy was a loser and our daughter was right to dump him.

I understand that you want to but don't do it. Just move on with your life.

 

[Rick James]

go get em 16

 

[Raiderfan32904]

What can be said to 16 that could possibly change his mind or influence him at this point? The FFA speaks in one clear & united voice telling him to do the opposite of his gut instinct, and he goes with the gut every time.

 

[Joseph]

Almost every "famous" person I've read of who has refused breathalizer/blood testing has gotten off to a lesser charge. If I ever find myself in this situation, and I try like hell to make sure I never do, I'm pleading the 5th and refusing everything.

Depends on where you are. San Antonio is a no-refusal city. Not sure if it is all of Texas, or just the city. Either way, refusal means you get to have your blood drawn in cuffs while being escorted by the nice police officer.

Doesn't it also bump up the charge to a felony?

I've never heard of this. I think it would be unconstitional encroachment on silence/self incrimination, but then again I think that should invalidate the blood draws too.

In some states (Minnesota, for one) it is my understanding it is a felony to refuse the test after arrest. I think you have a good point with the 5th issue, but I'm sure that's been litigated.In most states if you refuse the state can suspend your license for much longer and the cops can still go get a warrant to draw your blood.

I'm pretty sure in NY you cannot refuse the test (automatic guilty, iirc).

this isn't true. You can refuse, which is considered an automatic guilty plea to a lesser charge and license revocation for some period, but the penalty is overall less than what a guilty conviction on a DUI charge would be.

 

[Johnny Rock]

Unless they're dying I see no reason to say goodbye.

 

[jamny]

Now your being a #### 16. Guess what, her parents may really like you but they LOVE her. Period. saying 'good bye' to them will be a feather in her hat and make the parents think your weird. Your life has fallen apart since the breakup yet you say your over her, no your not at least not by your behavior. Let her go and don't be that weird guy who says goodbye to the folks cuz they really don't care about you. Sorry. V

Don't call her parents. Take it from a father with a daughter -- we might think a boyfriend is great but once there is a breakup the guy ceases to exist. If an ex-boyfriend calls we immediately think the guy was a loser and our daughter was right to dump him.

I understand that you want to but don't do it. Just move on with your life.

Listen to this perspective 16!It's been 6 weeks. They're over it. They care about their daughters happiness and that's it.

 

[jamny]

What are the current odds of 16 getting back with his girlfriend. This is seeming more and more like a 7 year itch where both people had one last fling before settling down.

 

[Dvorak]

Go out like a man, the parents will understand you not saying goodbye to them. It might even come across as some sort of weird hail mary by you to get her back.

Because that is exactly what it is. He's trying to get her parents to be "on his side" and talk her into taking him back.

 

[Cold Dead Hands]

So having read through this thread, this is schtick, right?

 

[gianmarco]

[No. 16]

"So I just got off the phone with her parents. Man, that did not go well. I don't understand why, but it seems her parents were not too happy with what happened between me and my ex and they seem to think this is all my fault. Her mother first answered the phone and then passed it to her dad who proceeded to get really angry and yell at me. I wasn't expecting this at all. I mean, we were together for 7 years and they treated me like a son-in-law and now I'm the bad guy? After she cheated on me? I bet she didn't even tell them that she was sleeping with another guy. I can't believe it. How on earth can they side with that #####?

This is not what I was hoping for and now I need to see how to make this better. The next step is definitely to call my ex and find out why she lied to her parents about me. Once I do this, I think I can definitely move on. Once again, you guys were right, but I definitely need to make this call to the ex and find out exactly what happened. I know, I know, I shouldn't make the call and I'm sure you guys will all tell me that I'm crazy for doing it, but you just don't understand. It's something I have to do. Don't try and stop me. I'll update with the next trainwreck soon."

[/No. 16]

 

[jamny]

[No. 16]"So I just got off the phone with her parents. Man, that did not go well. I don't understand why, but it seems her parents were not too happy with what happened between me and my ex and they seem to think this is all my fault. Her mother first answered the phone and then passed it to her dad who proceeded to get really angry and yell at me. I wasn't expecting this at all. I mean, we were together for 7 years and they treated me like a son-in-law and now I'm the bad guy? After she cheated on me? I bet she didn't even tell them that she was sleeping with another guy. I can't believe it. How on earth can they side with that #####?This is not what I was hoping for and now I need to see how to make this better. The next step is definitely to call my ex and find out why she lied to her parents about me. Once I do this, I think I can definitely move on. Once again, you guys were right, but I definitely need to make this call to the ex and find out exactly what happened. I know, I know, I shouldn't make the call and I'm sure you guys will all tell me that I'm crazy for doing it, but you just don't understand. It's something I have to do. Don't try and stop me. I'll update with the next trainwreck soon."[/No. 16]

spot on!

 

[The Hank]

[No. 16]"So I just got off the phone with her parents. Man, that did not go well. I don't understand why, but it seems her parents were not too happy with what happened between me and my ex and they seem to think this is all my fault. Her mother first answered the phone and then passed it to her dad who proceeded to get really angry and yell at me. I wasn't expecting this at all. I mean, we were together for 7 years and they treated me like a son-in-law and now I'm the bad guy? After she cheated on me? I bet she didn't even tell them that she was sleeping with another guy. I can't believe it. How on earth can they side with that #####?This is not what I was hoping for and now I need to see how to make this better. The next step is definitely to call my ex and find out why she lied to her parents about me. Once I do this, I think I can definitely move on. Once again, you guys were right, but I definitely need to make this call to the ex and find out exactly what happened. I know, I know, I shouldn't make the call and I'm sure you guys will all tell me that I'm crazy for doing it, but you just don't understand. It's something I have to do. Don't try and stop me. I'll update with the next trainwreck soon."[/No. 16]

 

[Rick James]

I can see where 16 is coming from a little bit. I've known my GF for 5 years, and we've been engaged for 1.5...if we broke up today I would be very tempted to give my in-laws a call to say "bye"...but I wouldn't.

You're not doing this to say bye man, you're doing it to get back at your ex which, like others have said, isn't going to happen because her parents are obviously going to side with her.

 

[IvanKaramazov]

[No. 16]"So I just got off the phone with her parents. Man, that did not go well. I don't understand why, but it seems her parents were not too happy with what happened between me and my ex and they seem to think this is all my fault. Her mother first answered the phone and then passed it to her dad who proceeded to get really angry and yell at me. I wasn't expecting this at all. I mean, we were together for 7 years and they treated me like a son-in-law and now I'm the bad guy? After she cheated on me? I bet she didn't even tell them that she was sleeping with another guy. I can't believe it. How on earth can they side with that #####?This is not what I was hoping for and now I need to see how to make this better. The next step is definitely to call my ex and find out why she lied to her parents about me. Once I do this, I think I can definitely move on. Once again, you guys were right, but I definitely need to make this call to the ex and find out exactly what happened. I know, I know, I shouldn't make the call and I'm sure you guys will all tell me that I'm crazy for doing it, but you just don't understand. It's something I have to do. Don't try and stop me. I'll update with the next trainwreck soon."[/No. 16]

This thread is starting to work its way into the same discussion as Man in the Yellow Hat's "Camping Trip" thread. It's not there yet, but it's in the discussion.

 

[Buck Bradcanon]

I think what we we've all learned from this thread is that there is video of a hot chick hulahooping on youtube.

 

[valhallan]

16, your entire experience is almost exactly the same as mine over a year ago. The major difference is I didn't have people giving me the correct perspective, which took me a good year to discover on my own. The FFA is completely right in how you need to proceed for yourself. Don't be a lost puppy like I was. Shut your face and just do as they say. You'll realize it was the right answer later.

 

[bushdocda]

Just days away from the reconciliation with the ex gf.

Contacting the parents is dumb. I was super close with my longtime gf's parents. That ended and so did relationship with the parents. Then one day years later when I was engaged I got a voicemail from the mom saying "it should have been ____".

I laughed.

 

[Rick James]

Could you guys take the DUI talk somewhere else? It's pretty boring

 

[Skipdog77]

Not to defend 16's repeated refusal to take the advice given to him in this thread, but I think the cultural issue he mentioned is playing a big part in what appears to be his insaane insistence on contacting the parents to say goodbye and thank you, and I can respect that.

How about sending a nice card?

 

[Raiderfan32904]

I think what we we've all learned from this thread is that there is video of a hot chick hulahooping on youtube.

I'll learn to stop clicking on external links that I thought would discuss DUI case resolutions on my wife's phone. Now that link's on her history file. great.

 

[Rick James]

Not to defend 16's repeated refusal to take the advice given to him in this thread, but I think the cultural issue he mentioned is playing a big part in what appears to be his insaane insistence on contacting the parents to say goodbye and thank you, and I can respect that.

How about sending a nice card?

I read that as "How about sending a rice card?"Much funnier that way.

 

[Maude]

[No. 16]

"So I just got off the phone with her parents. Man, that did not go well. I don't understand why, but it seems her parents were not too happy with what happened between me and my ex and they seem to think this is all my fault. Her mother first answered the phone and then passed it to her dad who proceeded to get really angry and yell at me. I wasn't expecting this at all. I mean, we were together for 7 years and they treated me like a son-in-law and now I'm the bad guy? After she cheated on me? I bet she didn't even tell them that she was sleeping with another guy. I can't believe it. How on earth can they side with that #####?

This is not what I was hoping for and now I need to see how to make this better. The next step is definitely to call my ex and find out why she lied to her parents about me. Once I do this, I think I can definitely move on. Once again, you guys were right, but I definitely need to make this call to the ex and find out exactly what happened. I know, I know, I shouldn't make the call and I'm sure you guys will all tell me that I'm crazy for doing it, but you just don't understand. It's something I have to do. Don't try and stop me. I'll update with the next trainwreck soon."

[/No. 16]

spot on!

It's a cultural thing!

 

[Gr00vus]

Don't contact her parents. Stop talking/thinking about the personal trainer - even if other people bring it up. Stop worrying about what she is/isn't doing. It's all a big waste of time and energy, and you'll probably regret it when you're in a better place. She's out of your life. Live like it.

 

[derek245583]

Me too

 

[IvanKaramazov]

The comments in that one are great, too.

 

[jomar]

been watching hula hoop videos for the last half hour....

 

[Gr00vus]

I think the hula hoop videos deserve their own spin off thread.

 

[sbonomo]

Now your being a #### 16. Guess what, her parents may really like you but they LOVE her. Period. saying 'good bye' to them will be a feather in her hat and make the parents think your weird. Your life has fallen apart since the breakup yet you say your over her, no your not at least not by your behavior. Let her go and don't be that weird guy who says goodbye to the folks cuz they really don't care about you. Sorry. V

You are being way too hard on 16...by no means is his life falling apart. he has a good career, good network of friends and is out in the dating scene doing well. Just because he got a DUI does not mean he is a bad person. he made a mistake and will learn from it...cut the kid some slack.

 

[nysportsfan]

been watching hula hoop videos for the last half hour....

The next half of my day is ruined.

 

[sbonomo]

I've been wanting to say good bye and thanks since the split. She stopped by my parents place and did the same the day after. The only reason I didn't do it sooner is because she wanted to tell her parents in person. So she asked if I could wait. She was supposed to this weekend, but was afraid/busy banging personal trainer.

So this isn't a matter of revenge. I've been wanting to do

it since the beginning for closure/respect. It is only an issue now because she didn't tell her parents as promised. I mean she has been with guy for a whole month. What is she waiting for?

Once I say my good bye to her family, I'll be completely done with her. No reason to continue contacting her (which i didn't until today).

This completely changes things....Call her parents and pay your respects.

 

[sbonomo]

[No. 16]

"So I just got off the phone with her parents. Man, that did not go well. I don't understand why, but it seems her parents were not too happy with what happened between me and my ex and they seem to think this is all my fault. Her mother first answered the phone and then passed it to her dad who proceeded to get really angry and yell at me. I wasn't expecting this at all. I mean, we were together for 7 years and they treated me like a son-in-law and now I'm the bad guy? After she cheated on me? I bet she didn't even tell them that she was sleeping with another guy. I can't believe it. How on earth can they side with that #####?

This is not what I was hoping for and now I need to see how to make this better. The next step is definitely to call my ex and find out why she lied to her parents about me. Once I do this, I think I can definitely move on. Once again, you guys were right, but I definitely need to make this call to the ex and find out exactly what happened. I know, I know, I shouldn't make the call and I'm sure you guys will all tell me that I'm crazy for doing it, but you just don't understand. It's something I have to do. Don't try and stop me. I'll update with the next trainwreck soon."

[/No. 16]

I love this place!

 

[comfortably numb]

I understand 16 wanting to just say good bye and thank you.

He may have been a son to them, and he may even have treated them as a parent.

I would agree to talk to them...at the 6 day mark(regardless what the ex said)....the 6 month mark not so much

 

[gianmarco]

I see what you did there.

Btw, re: that video:

7: Cute girl at the hula club, in classes, at work, in your neighborhood. Definitely cute, but not tops hula dancing locally.

 

[No. 16]

I understand 16 wanting to just say good bye and thank you.He may have been a son to them, and he may even have treated them as a parent.I would agree to talk to them...at the 6 day mark(regardless what the ex said)....the 6 month mark not so much

6 week mark?

 

[gianmarco]

I understand 16 wanting to just say good bye and thank you.He may have been a son to them, and he may even have treated them as a parent.I would agree to talk to them...at the 6 day mark(regardless what the ex said)....the 6 month mark not so much

6 week mark?

 

[Gr00vus]

I understand 16 wanting to just say good bye and thank you.He may have been a son to them, and he may even have treated them as a parent.I would agree to talk to them...at the 6 day mark(regardless what the ex said)....the 6 month mark not so much

6 week mark?

Sail on.

 

[comfortably numb]

I understand 16 wanting to just say good bye and thank you.He may have been a son to them, and he may even have treated them as a parent.I would agree to talk to them...at the 6 day mark(regardless what the ex said)....the 6 month mark not so much

6 week mark?

My bad, that was a typo, i did mean 6 weeks.Yea, 6 weeks... too much has gone on, you probably didn't want to tell her parents anything in a way also because you thought maybe, just maybe you guys would get back together.I understand that, but a lot of time has passed.I do get wanting to talk to them, not even from a cultural thing, but just out of respect, but IMO, this probably means more to you than to anyone else.I would have told them the second she talked to your parents, that time has passed and ship has sailed.I would just move on.