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Indians - What's your experience? (1 Viewer)

I see #1 and #2 almost every day when I'm out running.  I run through a neighborhood with a heavy Indian presence and aside from the random guy waving hello, I'm always ignored.  I can't think of a single woman that's not looked 100% miserable; it's really strange.  I've often wondered if they just look that way by default and aren't really that miserable. :shrug:  

I've worked with hundreds of them (in IT) and I can't think of any that weren't super nice.  Always pleasant to talk to (when they actually want to talk) and will do absolutely anything you ask.  Great coworkers. 

 
Alright.  My takeaway is that there's a large barrier to entry, but once I get in good with them I'll be happy to call them my friends.  

 
Oh yeah. When speaking in broad generalities: Many operate a bit within their own community and might be politely detached initially (though rarely rude or standoffish)... they are definitely great friends by and large. 

 
Large Indian population in Silicon Valley, in my town in particular.  Most keep to themselves in general, as do many of the cultures around here.  In general, great coworkers and neighbors even if most aren't in the "have you over for a BBQ" mold.  The kids are absolutely great, combining the culture of taking education seriously with a desire to integrate within all cultures in their classes and neighborhoods.  

 
The men are generally personable, in my experience. The women a bit more reserved. Unusually smart as a people, and hard working. 

 
Maybe it would help if you engaged in some lighthearted banter with your neighbors. Perhaps you can bond over baseball? I believe the NyeMets are a favorite squadron of many Indian-Americans.

 
Captain Cranks said:
Alright.  My takeaway is that there's a large barrier to entry, but once I get in good with them I'll be happy to call them my friends.  
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Is it a desire of yours to become friends with Indians?   I think they're wonderful people but besides one dude that was more of a hipster, I never hung out with any of them outside of work.   I don't think we'd have too many common interests.   

 
NutterButter said:
Is it a desire of yours to become friends with Indians?   I think they're wonderful people but besides one dude that was more of a hipster, I never hung out with any of them outside of work.   I don't think we'd have too many common interests.   
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It would kind of be cool to hang out with my neighbors.  Or at least not have them slam the door in my kid's face.  

 
Jobber said:
Your typical Indian in the US is highly educated and hard working. They pass this onto their children, too. Chances are your neighbor doesn't want your boorish redneck family (in their eyes) dragging them down.

I have two cousins who married Indians. Great, great people but very serious about the education and hard work.
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:lmao:   Probably hit the nail on the head.  Also, can we get a "dot" not "feather" clarification in the title.

 
Indians are my favorite colored people. One of my best friend's is Indian and he's on his way to being stupid successful.

 
Captain Cranks said:
I live in a relatively affluent neighborhood in the Tampa area.  Many of my neighbors are either older, white empty-nesters or first or second generation immigrants from India that work in the medical field.  I try not to paint people with a broad brush, but based on my experience, I've noticed some reoccurring themes.  
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Been rooting for them for years.

 
Has anyone been to an Indian restaurant that wasn't buffet?   I've probably been to about a dozen.   I always eat way, way too much.    So damn good.   That galub jamin dessert is ridiculously good.

 
Amused to Death said:
Many Indian people here in NJ in the civil engineering field.  Same experience. However I suspect like any race/nationality, you're likely to come across the occasional anti-social person or family.  Maybe they've faced an unfair amount of misplaced Muslim prejudice and have developed a dislike of white people.  With some of the stories I've heard, it wouldn't surprise me.
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Yes, we have many Indian families in my town and they are all very acclimated and "westernized". In fact my step son is very good friends with one boy and we've often socialized with his parents. They hold dinner parties with whites and other Indians and everyone gets along great. 

I also work near a town that is almost entirely Indian but they are not as acclimated and seem to hold onto the traditions of their homeland. They dress in traditional clothing and all of the restaurants, shops (Cash N Carry) etc. are Indian. My impression is they would prefer to stick to themselves.

 
My dad was from India, and came over to the US for college. He was supposed to go back afterwards to begin his career and a courtship with an approved woman. He decided in no uncertain terms to eff that, found himself a white woman to bear me and stayed over here. He did not like Indians at all and told me to mostly avoid them.

 
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BigSteelThrill said:
From my experiences over the past few years...

The FOB (fresh off the boat) male Indians at the clubs... horrible.  Just flatly horrible. The idiocy is unmatched. Young or old.

The Indian women often try anything possible to avoid them.  I have had the grouped up females state on several occasions "we hate our own kind" :shock: or something similar.
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Probably because Indian men are very rapey.

 
pats3in4 said:
Large Indian population in Silicon Valley, in my town in particular.  Most keep to themselves in general, as do many of the cultures around here.  In general, great coworkers and neighbors even if most aren't in the "have you over for a BBQ" mold.  The kids are absolutely great, combining the culture of taking education seriously with a desire to integrate within all cultures in their classes and neighborhoods.  
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Great co-workers until they get a foothold in management, then it's all over.

 
Spent last year living in London.  Loads of them there.  My impressions:

Families tend to be strict.  Kids are pretty much instructed to be doctors or lawyers.  

Women, when they are attractive, are insanely hot.  Skinny with big boobs.  

Found them funny and friendly.  Am surprised anyone has a problem with them.  

On the other hand, ask me about Romanians, Albanians, Italians, Saudi, Russians and I will have plenty of nasty things to say.

 
Only read OP, but if Em likes it, then I know that the problem is on the poster.  Stop being a racist ####er.

 
TobiasFunke said:
In fairness we should probably consider the likelihood that they're just anti-social, miserable and stoic because they're stuck in Tampa.
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Yeah, they leave India just to end up in Tampa. They've gotta be wondering where they went wrong.

 
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We moved last July to a new city. Our neighbor on one side is an Indian family with 2 girls. On the other side are Canadians with the wife being 100% Chinese (2nd generation). 

The Indian couple are here on work visas but clearly have long term goals because they bought a home. This is their first time in the US - both girls were born in Mumbai. She was a chemical engineer in India but doesn't have the work visa so she's a SAHM. My wife has become great friends with her. Their kids are super well behaved. She is actually fairly friendly - her husband works a lot so I never see him. Both him and the Canadian next door are pretty quiet. 

But the Chinese Canadian woman - super nice, friendly, outgoing, talkative but their kids are a nightmare. They let the kids do whatever they want. Their dog is always roaming free as are the kids. 

 
mr roboto said:
We moved last July to a new city. Our neighbor on one side is an Indian family with 2 girls. On the other side are Canadians with the wife being 100% Chinese (2nd generation). 

The Indian couple are here on work visas but clearly have long term goals because they bought a home. This is their first time in the US - both girls were born in Mumbai. She was a chemical engineer in India but doesn't have the work visa so she's a SAHM. My wife has become great friends with her. Their kids are super well behaved. She is actually fairly friendly - her husband works a lot so I never see him. Both him and the Canadian next door are pretty quiet. 

But the Chinese Canadian woman - super nice, friendly, outgoing, talkative but their kids are a nightmare. They let the kids do whatever they want. Their dog is always roaming free as are the kids. 
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The dog's days are numbered

 
The thing that I have always found odd about Indian women is that there are no average looking Indian women. 95% of the them are rough looking. I mean, wow, just rough essentially no higher than a 3 and that is usually on their best day. Then you have that 5% which are absolutely stop you in your tracks movie star gorgeous. There is no middle ground. Ever.

 
Chadstroma said:
The thing that I have always found odd about Indian women is that there are no average looking Indian women. 95% of the them are rough looking. I mean, wow, just rough essentially no higher than a 3 and that is usually on their best day. Then you have that 5% which are absolutely stop you in your tracks movie star gorgeous. There is no middle ground. Ever.
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Mindy Kaling? :oldunsure:

 
My son's girlfriend is Indian. She is pretty, smart and incredibly kind and chill. Her parents are both doctors who were born in India.  They hug my son every time they see him and all extremely warm and friendly to us when we cross paths. My wife and I both consider his relationship with her as one of the best things that's happened during our son's entire senior year of high school 

 
As much as being customers..... many tend to be come off as being abrupt and demanding initially but once you win them over they are very willing to work with you more so than your typical American, are very friendly and very loyal to you. I have found that that tends to be the case with most people groups that are 1st generation. The 'wall' is high to scale (different cultures may have different forms of walls) but once you do- they are much better customers than your 2nd and on generation customers because they value your efforts and don't take them for granted, they really turn that appreciation into a friendship from a business transaction and they will not just tell people about you but bring them to you. A lot of your tour typical 2nd and on generation Americans will say thanks and never give another thought about how you went above and beyond for them.

And what you are really talking about here is cultures. Cultures are different and they do have a great impact on they shape how people act and react. 2nd generation Americans typically have been assimilated into the broader American culture (though sub cultures still exist) while 1st generation Americans or resident alien or illegal it is much harder to change culture. Once Americanized, people are people and the tendency to have cultural heritage shape their personalities is greatly diminished. It is always helpful to remember that what one culture finds perfectly acceptable another will find absolutely insulting. It is not about the person but about the culture.

I have a buddy who is Indian. He actually had British citizenship though he moved here as an infant. He is as American as me or anyone else I know. I didn't know he wasn't an actual American until we went to Europe together and had to wait for his dumb Brit rear in customs for a couple of hours coming home. :rant:  He actually finally went through the process and got his US citizenship. However, as much as culture goes- he is absolutely 100% American.

Same for my wife who is 100% Filipina but was born and raised here. She is 100% American though there is a sub culture that she belongs to as well- sub cultures do not tend to drive behavior like a persons culture does.

 
massraider said:
Spent last year living in London.  Loads of them there.  My impressions:

Families tend to be strict.  Kids are pretty much instructed to be doctors or lawyers.  

Women, when they are attractive, are insanely hot.  Skinny with big boobs.  

Found them funny and friendly.  Am surprised anyone has a problem with them.  

On the other hand, ask me about Romanians, Albanians, Italians, Saudi, Russians and I will have plenty of nasty things to say.
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Let's hear about the Italians. 

 
eoMMan said:
I like the movie where the Indian guy is on a little boat with a tiger he named Richard Sherman.
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That would be pretty confusing if a sea hawk landed on his boat...

 
I agree with most of what's been said.  Painting a broad brush, very polite, hard working people.  Though not my own personal experience, I've had friends who have been absolutely miserable working for Indian entrepreneurs in the tech industry.  Zero work/life balance in their experience.  Nights, Saturdays, Sundays - they worked 24X7 and expected you to do the same.  No boundaries.  So much my friend said it was the worst 2 years of his life and he'll never work for leadership of Indian descent again.  He's not a racist so his experience had to be horrific for him to say that.  That being said, I wish some folks on my team had a little more of that work ethic...

ETA - a co-worker had the type of elaborate wedding mentioned in this thread.  Days and days of parties, ceremonies, elaborate dress.  No expense spared.  Had to be hundreds of thousands of US dollars all-in.  Very, very big deal for the parents.

 
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