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Last day at work. Ask me anything. (1 Viewer)

sorry man i hope that you have a landing spot and that stuff works out well for you now my question what cool office supplies are going with you take that to the bank bromigo

 
SWC said:
sorry man i hope that you have a landing spot and that stuff works out well for you now my question what cool office supplies are going with you take that to the bank bromigo
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The only thing worth keeping was my Bluetooth headset. I'm planning on buying a 1997 BMW and going as a stock broker for halloween. 

 
Johnny Rock said:
Can you make a huge sale today that ensures you go out on top?

What are you doing for lunch?
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I don't sell anything, buy anything, or process anything as a career. I dont sell anything bought or processed, or buy anything sold or processed, or process anything sold, bought, or processed, or repair anything sold, bought, or processed. You know, as a career, I don't do that.

 
need2know said:
What are you stealing
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Very little. This company is pretty cheap. They have a long line of Rubbermaid tubs lined up down the hall. We are suppose to separate all of our office supplies and place them it the correct container. (So the liquidator can sell them for a quarter a bin?).

I suppose I could take a dump in one of the bins. But I generally like to read while I crap, so it wouldn't be quick and I'd probably get caught.

 
KCitons said:
I suppose I could take a dump in one of the bins. But I generally like to read while I crap, so it wouldn't be quick and I'd probably get caught.
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see, the dump in the bin shtick will also get ya caught quicker because of the stank ? and, as you said, it would also take too long ...

i suggest a nice healthy piss, instead - would #### the bins up more, inasmuch that #### can be scraped off, but piss saturates items in that glorious urine aroma. 

and, if you're feeling extra frisky, you could always drop some baby batter as a topper.  fun times right there. 

 
NREC34 said:
What kind of actual work are you doing today?
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At first I didn't think there would be anything. One of the big wigs just realized I am not going to be here after today. He relies on me to get him analytics reports. He just requested a few before the end of the day.

 
KCitons said:
At first I didn't think there would be anything. One of the big wigs just realized I am not going to be here after today. He relies on me to get him analytics reports. He just requested a few before the end of the day.
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Tell him to #### off.

 
take a massive dump on the toilet seat

take fecal sample from earlier dump and put on your supervisors car door handle

 
Poke_4_Life said:
First, how are you?

Any chance the Royals turn it around this year?  Also how about that Chiefs Draft!?!?
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I'm surprisingly well. Thank you for asking.

Royals need to wake up their bats. But you can't expect to win 7-6 every game. Chiefs are what they are. An above average team, but never a Super Bowl. The just never get over that hump.

 
someone wants you to do work on your last before being laid off?  I would've looked at that guy and laughed and laughed and laughed.  then I would've laughed some more.

I would just sit there and stare straight ahead.  maybe search gun stuff on the internet.  mumble under your breath.

 
Brunell4MVP said:
Go to a bunch of desks and switch around the mouses (mice...whatever).
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One of the guys I work with is staying on with the new company. He's out all week, so I used a whole roll of packing tape on his cubicle. It will take him an hour to before he will be able to use his desk.

 
Last edited by a moderator:
KCitons said:
I would love to. But, I try not to burn too many bridges. Our paths may cross again some day.

Edit: but the report doesn't have to be accurate.
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If he doesn't expect it until EOD, no need to really do it. 

 
NutterButter said:
If he doesn't expect it until EOD, no need to really do it. 
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I agree. People are starting to dump stuff on me now that they know I won't be here tomorrow. Starting to piss me off. Another hour and I will take a long lunch. Then find a hiding place for a few hours.

 
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