Boston fans are not forgiving. Unless your name is Manny, they won't put up with less than 100%. Hence the popularity of Johnny Damon, Trot Nixon, Jason Varitek, etc. Those guys leave it all on the field. If Drew isn't perceived as giving it everything he's got AND he has a slow start, the Sox fans will get all over him. (See Renteria)
Or David Ortiz.There, I said it.
HOW DARE YOU!!!!!!"David Ortiz is the father of every kid in that town!"
"One time I was with David Ortiz in the back of a pickup truck, along with a live deer. David Ortiz goes up to the deer and says, 'I'm David Ortiz! SAY IT!' Then he manipulates the deer's lips in such a way as to make it say, 'David Ortiz' ... It wasn't exactly like it, but it was pretty good for a deer!'"
"David Ortiz's poop is used as currency in Argentina."
"David Ortiz sweats Gatorade"
"David Ortiz once breast-fed a flamingo back to health."
"David Ortiz hated Mexicans! And he was half Mexican! .......And he hated irony!"
"I once saw him scissor kick Angela Landsbury."
"David Ortiz sheds his skin once a year."
"David Ortiz did 3 tours in 'Nam...... I was in Corpus Christi on business a month ago. I had this eight foot tall Asian waiter, which made me curious. I asked him his name. Sure enough it's Ho Tran Ortiz!"
"I once saw David Ortiz eat a whole live chicken."
"David Ortiz was a two ton man-mountain who could palm a medicine ball!"
"Did I ever tell you about the time David Ortiz took me out to go get a drink with him? We go off looking for a bar and we can't find one. Finally Ortiz takes me to a vacant lot and says, 'Here we are.' We sat there for a year and a half and sure enough someone constructs a bar around us. The day they opened we ordered a shot, drank it, and then burned the place to the ground. Ortiz yelled over the roar of the flames, 'Always leave things the way you found em!'"
"David Ortiz had a four day heart attack...a day for each chamber. At the autopsy, they said his heart looked like a basketball filled with riccotta cheese."
"David Ortiz once punched a hole in a cow just to see who was coming up the road."
"David Ortiz taught me how to make love to a woman, and how to scold a child."
"David Ortiz drank a full glass of liquid LSD with his eggs. Then he slept for 8 months straight. When he woke he rubbed his eyes and said, 'All in all, I prefer gin.'"
"They say Gene Roddenbery got the idea for Star Trek from listening to David Ortiz talk in his sleep."
"He date raped David Bowie."
"He once inhaled a seagull."
"David Ortiz killed Wolfman Jack with a trident."
"David Ortiz uses the Shroud of Turin as a golf towel."
"David Ortiz once ate the Bible while water skiing."
"David Ortiz drives an ice cream truck covered in human skulls."
"David Ortiz has dandruff the size of mice!"
"David Ortiz jogged with a fridge on his back!"
"David Ortiz is a 10 foot monster who slept with all our wives! And punched us all in the face! And we loved him for it!"
"Did I ever tell you about the time David Ortiz went hunting? David Ortiz decides he's going to hunt down all four of the Banana Splits. He stalks and kills every one of them with a machette. They all begged for their lives...except Fleagle."
"We once had a bachelor party for David Ortiz. He ate the entire cake before we could tell him there was a stripper in it."
"David Ortiz's family crest is a picture of a baracudda eating Neil Armstrong."
"David Ortiz ranked 18th in the AP College Football Pool."
"Did I ever tell you about the time David Ortiz was in a production of, 'The King & I?' On opening night, David Ortiz chloroforms the entire cast and slowly eats them in front of the audience for two hours. The production got pretty good reviews."
"David Ortiz breastfeeds John Madden."
"David Ortiz named the group Sha-Na-Na. They did NOT want to be called that."
"If you drop a phonograph needle on David Ortiz's nipple, it plays the Beach Boys' 'Pet Sounds.'"
"They use David Ortiz's foreskin as a tarp when it rains at Yankee stadium."
"David Ortiz wears a live rattlesnake as a condom."
"Did I ever tell you about the time he taught his son how to drive? He did it by entering him in the Indy 500. The kid wrecked and died. David Ortiz said it would've happened sometime."
"David Ortiz's semen can form into a liquid human - like the guy from 'Terminator 2'"
You can insult the Auld Country, Boston baked beans and Samuel Adams...but do not tarnish the rep of David Ortiz!