Marital Advice - Friendly camping trip too friendly? (2 Viewers)

[Shutterbug]

My experience as a prosecutor is that people will look you in the eye and lie. For indicia of truth I look more to where their eyes go in those moments when they look away. I find when people look up and to the right they are searching memory. When they look down they are fabricting and inventing. I also watch for an open body frame directed towards me or a closed up frame covered by arms and tilted away. Finally I watch for obstruction of the mouth by hands or by closed lips which also tend to indicate obfuscation.

Brilliant posting, actually, and every bit of it is spot on.

I agree, .I read about all of this in the book 'Never be lied to again' by David Lieberman. It works. Really hard when online, though. This is where you have to look for inconsistencies.

 

[Corporation]

My experience as a prosecutor is that people will look you in the eye and lie. For indicia of truth I look more to where their eyes go in those moments when they look away. I find when people look up and to the right they are searching memory. When they look down they are fabricting and inventing. I also watch for an open body frame directed towards me or a closed up frame covered by arms and tilted away. Finally I watch for obstruction of the mouth by hands or by closed lips which also tend to indicate obfuscation.

Brilliant posting, actually, and every bit of it is spot on.

I've heard this before, but when I am thinking or trying to solve a problem I look down. Looking up feels uncomofortable. I've tried it.Maybe I'm just an odd person.

It's evolving, I've gone to fraud and investigation courses. DW is pretty much dead-on. Liars are so aware that liars "don't make eye contact" that now they intentionally make eye contact. You can tell more by the angle of their head. In normal conversation, the head naturally lists back a little bit. When someone is forcing eye contact, they draw their head up and are much more stiff. He's right on about looking to the right to access memory and looking to the upper left corner of their eyes to access the creative part of the brain. Another subconscious thing they do if they are sitting is that they will slowly begin inching away from you and closer to an exit.

 

[Godfather of Soul]

I don't get why people are so quick to call on every thread around here anymore. I mean really...If it is WHO CARES????? This thread has reached 40+ pages and has caused millions of dollars in lost revenue from countless companies! or real (I believe the story to be real FWIW), this has been a very interesting story to follow.Get lost police!

X 1,000

Sometimes when people have an IQ of say, I don't know, 36...well, that's the best they have.I feel sad for them. They may die alone.

 

[omally]

I feel sorry for the wives of you guys who say you'd divorce her if she ever cheated, no matter the circumstances. That kind of hard heartedness can be just as destructive as infidelity.

I feel sorry for all of the guys that say they would stay with their wife if she treated him with such little respect. I believe it shows a lack of respect for themselves, a lack of confidence, and probably a slew of other issues. To each their own.

Man in a Yellow Hat really showed his wife a lot of respect when he knew she was drunk out of her mind, and he was told twice by a friend that he should check on her, because she was in the stall with a known womanizer, and he did nothing.

 

[mhrutkowski]

Just gotta say that while that OP definitely screwed the pooch by not checking up on her, he's not even close to as culpable as she is. Let's not get carried away. Not that it really matters.

 

[JFT Ben]

I'm not a frequent poster, but have been around since the cheatsheets.net days as a long-time lurker. I've sympathized with MITYH since page 2 when I got on this train, and have felt pretty bad for the guy while he was getting beat up for not "Mannning Up". I didn't understand why I felt like this since I too agreed that he should have done more, but I stepped back I found out why. MITYH and I are cut from the same cloth, so much so that it could have been me writing the original post. I have many similarities and traits; I live and work in southcentral WI, am probably around the same age, have similar group of friends, and am also far from an Alpha Male since I am passive (or alternately passive-aggressive), avoid confrontation in all but the most serious circumstances, am a "nice guy", and want to trust and believe in people despite evidence showing otherwise. I've been stepped on a few times and can physically defend myself if need be, but have never been in, nor hope to be in, a physical "fight" per se. I can see his rationalization for his actions throughout the process, since I too would likely rationalize and procede in much the same way. I have to say it's an inherent personality trait and it is what it is, it is neither good or bad, right or wrong. He or I will never be the loud, brash and overly confident Alpha Male that many are suggesting he become overnight. His wife chose to be with him knowing full well this is who he is, for better or worse and whether she "settled" or not is irrelevant.

I find it hard to believe based on the tale woven that something didn't happen in the bathroom, and find it harder to believe that she doesn't remember. 'Deny to the bitter end' is what I've read over and over from those involved with infedelity, a convenient out is what it is. Hell, if I was in her shoes, I'd do the same thing if I didn't want a divorce and really just made a stupid mistake. Even if the right thing to do is to admit her guilt, spill the beans and beg forgiveness, I doubt she ever will. As others have mentioned, to find out exactly what happened, George needs to be interrigated and not let up until you get the answers you're looking for. ..And those who think George isn't a good friend or is evil, that's probably not the case either. As others have mentioned, George doesn't want to get in the middle, but there is more than that.. George probably doesn't want to hurt his pal MITYH and probably hopes that MITYH lives without the knowledge or finds out on his own that his wife is a cheating whore. In college, we had a close group of 4-5 guys who lived in two adjoining apartments. While the specifics escape me, there came to be some evidence or knowledge that one of the guys, Mike, was being cheated on by his girlfriend. To make matters worse, the dude she was cheating on was one of Mike's other friends that wasn't part of our group. The rest of us all knew about it, but no one had the balls to break Mike's heart with the news and all hoped he would find out on his own. It wasn't until my then -girlfriend (now wife), who knew Mike longer than me and knew Mike's girlfriend, told Mike that he found out. I think we all regret not telling him, but I think if we were asked direct, point-blank questions, we would have told him. Does that make us all A-holes? Yes, but we thought we had Mike's feelings in mind at the time. I still regret not telling him, but he forgave us knowing that we weren't intentially trying to F him over, it was only poor judgement.

So my point being A) MITYH, go after George and don't let up. He wants you to know but is both a chicken-s hit and I think doesn't want you to feel the pain he knows you likely will, let him know it won't effect the relationship between you and George and that you will hold him in high regard for being a true friend and B) After you find out more of the story, determine what it means to you, assuming your wife remembers, feels awful and will never tell you the truth. I would think some counciling would be in order if nothing else. You're marriage will be starting from scratch in many ways and if you don't rebuild properly, you risk a complete collapse or lifelong animosity if you stay together. Stay strong man, I honestly feel for you and know you're doing what you think is right, no matter how what the masses here think you should do. Once taken to completion, let it go. Best of luck.

JFT

 

[prosopis]

Who the hell doesn't have a cell phone? I don't know a single person under the age of 80 and over the age of 16 who doesn't have one.

I dont have one I am 41

 

[Penguin]

I'm not a frequent poster, but have been around since the cheatsheets.net days as a long-time lurker. I've sympathized with MITYH since page 2 when I got on this train, and have felt pretty bad for the guy while he was getting beat up for not "Mannning Up". I didn't understand why I felt like this since I too agreed that he should have done more, but I stepped back I found out why. MITYH and I are cut from the same cloth, so much so that it could have been me writing the original post. I have many similarities and traits; I live and work in southcentral WI, am probably around the same age, have similar group of friends, and am also far from an Alpha Male since I am passive (or alternately passive-aggressive), avoid confrontation in all but the most serious circumstances, am a "nice guy", and want to trust and believe in people despite evidence showing otherwise. I've been stepped on a few times and can physically defend myself if need be, but have never been in, nor hope to be in, a physical "fight" per se. I can see his rationalization for his actions throughout the process, since I too would likely rationalize and procede in much the same way. I have to say it's an inherent personality trait and it is what it is, it is neither good or bad, right or wrong. He or I will never be the loud, brash and overly confident Alpha Male that many are suggesting he become overnight. His wife chose to be with him knowing full well this is who he is, for better or worse and whether she "settled" or not is irrelevant.I find it hard to believe based on the tale woven that something didn't happen in the bathroom, and find it harder to believe that she doesn't remember. 'Deny to the bitter end' is what I've read over and over from those involved with infedelity, a convenient out is what it is. Hell, if I was in her shoes, I'd do the same thing if I didn't want a divorce and really just made a stupid mistake. Even if the right thing to do is to admit her guilt, spill the beans and beg forgiveness, I doubt she ever will. As others have mentioned, to find out exactly what happened, George needs to be interrigated and not let up until you get the answers you're looking for. ..And those who think George isn't a good friend or is evil, that's probably not the case either. As others have mentioned, George doesn't want to get in the middle, but there is more than that.. George probably doesn't want to hurt his pal MITYH and probably hopes that MITYH lives without the knowledge or finds out on his own that his wife is a cheating whore. In college, we had a close group of 4-5 guys who lived in two adjoining apartments. While the specifics escape me, there came to be some evidence or knowledge that one of the guys, Mike, was being cheated on by his girlfriend. To make matters worse, the dude she was cheating on was one of Mike's other friends that wasn't part of our group. The rest of us all knew about it, but no one had the balls to break Mike's heart with the news and all hoped he would find out on his own. It wasn't until my then -girlfriend (now wife), who knew Mike longer than me and knew Mike's girlfriend, told Mike that he found out. I think we all regret not telling him, but I think if we were asked direct, point-blank questions, we would have told him. Does that make us all A-holes? Yes, but we thought we had Mike's feelings in mind at the time. I still regret not telling him, but he forgave us knowing that we weren't intentially trying to F him over, it was only poor judgement.So my point being A) MITYH, go after George and don't let up. He wants you to know but is both a chicken-s hit and I think doesn't want you to feel the pain he knows you likely will, let him know it won't effect the relationship between you and George and that you will hold him in high regard for being a true friend and B) After you find out more of the story, determine what it means to you, assuming your wife remembers, feels awful and will never tell you the truth. I would think some counciling would be in order if nothing else. You're marriage will be starting from scratch in many ways and if you don't rebuild properly, you risk a complete collapse or lifelong animosity if you stay together. Stay strong man, I honestly feel for you and know you're doing what you think is right, no matter how what the masses here think you should do. Once taken to completion, let it go. Best of luck.JFT

Going after George is just wasting time. It's been said multiple times that George & Steve's wife were back at the campfire long before WIFE & Steve. George wasn't in the bathroom long enough to witness anything other than what MITYH already knows.

 

[Sweet J]

I'm not a frequent poster, but have been around since the cheatsheets.net days as a long-time lurker. I've sympathized with MITYH since page 2 when I got on this train, and have felt pretty bad for the guy while he was getting beat up for not "Mannning Up". I didn't understand why I felt like this since I too agreed that he should have done more, but I stepped back I found out why. MITYH and I are cut from the same cloth, so much so that it could have been me writing the original post. I have many similarities and traits; I live and work in southcentral WI, am probably around the same age, have similar group of friends, and am also far from an Alpha Male since I am passive (or alternately passive-aggressive), avoid confrontation in all but the most serious circumstances, am a "nice guy", and want to trust and believe in people despite evidence showing otherwise. I've been stepped on a few times and can physically defend myself if need be, but have never been in, nor hope to be in, a physical "fight" per se. I can see his rationalization for his actions throughout the process, since I too would likely rationalize and procede in much the same way. I have to say it's an inherent personality trait and it is what it is, it is neither good or bad, right or wrong. He or I will never be the loud, brash and overly confident Alpha Male that many are suggesting he become overnight. His wife chose to be with him knowing full well this is who he is, for better or worse and whether she "settled" or not is irrelevant.I find it hard to believe based on the tale woven that something didn't happen in the bathroom, and find it harder to believe that she doesn't remember. 'Deny to the bitter end' is what I've read over and over from those involved with infedelity, a convenient out is what it is. Hell, if I was in her shoes, I'd do the same thing if I didn't want a divorce and really just made a stupid mistake. Even if the right thing to do is to admit her guilt, spill the beans and beg forgiveness, I doubt she ever will. As others have mentioned, to find out exactly what happened, George needs to be interrigated and not let up until you get the answers you're looking for. ..And those who think George isn't a good friend or is evil, that's probably not the case either. As others have mentioned, George doesn't want to get in the middle, but there is more than that.. George probably doesn't want to hurt his pal MITYH and probably hopes that MITYH lives without the knowledge or finds out on his own that his wife is a cheating whore. In college, we had a close group of 4-5 guys who lived in two adjoining apartments. While the specifics escape me, there came to be some evidence or knowledge that one of the guys, Mike, was being cheated on by his girlfriend. To make matters worse, the dude she was cheating on was one of Mike's other friends that wasn't part of our group. The rest of us all knew about it, but no one had the balls to break Mike's heart with the news and all hoped he would find out on his own. It wasn't until my then -girlfriend (now wife), who knew Mike longer than me and knew Mike's girlfriend, told Mike that he found out. I think we all regret not telling him, but I think if we were asked direct, point-blank questions, we would have told him. Does that make us all A-holes? Yes, but we thought we had Mike's feelings in mind at the time. I still regret not telling him, but he forgave us knowing that we weren't intentially trying to F him over, it was only poor judgement.So my point being A) MITYH, go after George and don't let up. He wants you to know but is both a chicken-s hit and I think doesn't want you to feel the pain he knows you likely will, let him know it won't effect the relationship between you and George and that you will hold him in high regard for being a true friend and B) After you find out more of the story, determine what it means to you, assuming your wife remembers, feels awful and will never tell you the truth. I would think some counciling would be in order if nothing else. You're marriage will be starting from scratch in many ways and if you don't rebuild properly, you risk a complete collapse or lifelong animosity if you stay together. Stay strong man, I honestly feel for you and know you're doing what you think is right, no matter how what the masses here think you should do. Once taken to completion, let it go. Best of luck.JFT

This is a heck of a post, man. I hope MITYH appreciates the time you took to write it.

 

[Giant Wooden Badger]

Summary?

That just about covers it, I think.

If there are further updates this weekend, someone please add to this. TIA

 

[Kais Hero]

The only thing that really needs to be said at this point is "GROW A SACK".

Your wife IS and HAS cheated on you. Wake up. Unless this behavior secretly turns you on then have some dignity and kick her ### to the curb.

 

[SuperJohn96]

Oh yeah...as this thread is about to hit 50 pages...I wanted to say to those of you who roasted me for admitting to watching Young & The Restless every day.

 

[avoiding injuries]

Even if MIYH ran to the bathroom stall when he was first told that he should check on his wife, his wife would have already had steve's wang in her hand. Damage had already begun, he just would have a) caught her in the act, b) stopped what may or may not have happened next.

If you can't trust your wife, maybe she shouldn't be your wife.

 

[General Malaise]

I'm not a frequent poster, but have been around since the cheatsheets.net days as a long-time lurker. I've sympathized with MITYH since page 2 when I got on this train, and have felt pretty bad for the guy while he was getting beat up for not "Mannning Up". I didn't understand why I felt like this since I too agreed that he should have done more, but I stepped back I found out why. MITYH and I are cut from the same cloth, so much so that it could have been me writing the original post. I have many similarities and traits; I live and work in southcentral WI, am probably around the same age, have similar group of friends, and am also far from an Alpha Male since I am passive (or alternately passive-aggressive), avoid confrontation in all but the most serious circumstances, am a "nice guy", and want to trust and believe in people despite evidence showing otherwise. I've been stepped on a few times and can physically defend myself if need be, but have never been in, nor hope to be in, a physical "fight" per se. I can see his rationalization for his actions throughout the process, since I too would likely rationalize and procede in much the same way. I have to say it's an inherent personality trait and it is what it is, it is neither good or bad, right or wrong. He or I will never be the loud, brash and overly confident Alpha Male that many are suggesting he become overnight. His wife chose to be with him knowing full well this is who he is, for better or worse and whether she "settled" or not is irrelevant.I find it hard to believe based on the tale woven that something didn't happen in the bathroom, and find it harder to believe that she doesn't remember. 'Deny to the bitter end' is what I've read over and over from those involved with infedelity, a convenient out is what it is. Hell, if I was in her shoes, I'd do the same thing if I didn't want a divorce and really just made a stupid mistake. Even if the right thing to do is to admit her guilt, spill the beans and beg forgiveness, I doubt she ever will. As others have mentioned, to find out exactly what happened, George needs to be interrigated and not let up until you get the answers you're looking for. ..And those who think George isn't a good friend or is evil, that's probably not the case either. As others have mentioned, George doesn't want to get in the middle, but there is more than that.. George probably doesn't want to hurt his pal MITYH and probably hopes that MITYH lives without the knowledge or finds out on his own that his wife is a cheating whore. In college, we had a close group of 4-5 guys who lived in two adjoining apartments. While the specifics escape me, there came to be some evidence or knowledge that one of the guys, Mike, was being cheated on by his girlfriend. To make matters worse, the dude she was cheating on was one of Mike's other friends that wasn't part of our group. The rest of us all knew about it, but no one had the balls to break Mike's heart with the news and all hoped he would find out on his own. It wasn't until my then -girlfriend (now wife), who knew Mike longer than me and knew Mike's girlfriend, told Mike that he found out. I think we all regret not telling him, but I think if we were asked direct, point-blank questions, we would have told him. Does that make us all A-holes? Yes, but we thought we had Mike's feelings in mind at the time. I still regret not telling him, but he forgave us knowing that we weren't intentially trying to F him over, it was only poor judgement.So my point being A) MITYH, go after George and don't let up. He wants you to know but is both a chicken-s hit and I think doesn't want you to feel the pain he knows you likely will, let him know it won't effect the relationship between you and George and that you will hold him in high regard for being a true friend and B) After you find out more of the story, determine what it means to you, assuming your wife remembers, feels awful and will never tell you the truth. I would think some counciling would be in order if nothing else. You're marriage will be starting from scratch in many ways and if you don't rebuild properly, you risk a complete collapse or lifelong animosity if you stay together. Stay strong man, I honestly feel for you and know you're doing what you think is right, no matter how what the masses here think you should do. Once taken to completion, let it go. Best of luck.JFT

This is a heck of a post, man. I hope MITYH appreciates the time you took to write it.

This guy should post more. Pretty blown away with that one.

 

[General Malaise]

In conclusion. To those of you who have actuall provided real advice, I say thank you. You know who you are. To those who have nothing better to do than bag on me, kiss my ###.

I'd be happy to; would you kindly remove your head from it first?! Sorry if I missed it but did anyone else catch the part where MIYH said his wife just about gave oral to Steve at a party once?!

you're not very good at following movies, are you?

 

[Penguin]

What information in the 2000+ posts so far is leading you people to believe that George knows more (from the reported short time he was present) than MITYH already knows. I could see if George didn't return for 5 minutes or so, but it has been said multiple times that George came back with Steve's wife shortly therafter. The huge lag was between the time George & Steve's wife returned until the time WIFE & Steve returned. It is during that timeframe that knowone was witness except for the two parties directly involved. I believe that everything Geaorge witnessed has already been relayed to MITYH.

 

[General Malaise]

What information in the 2000+ posts so far is leading you people to believe that George knows more (from the reported short time he was present) than MITYH already knows. I could see if George didn't return for 5 minutes or so, but it has been said multiple times that George came back with Steve's wife shortly therafter. The huge lag was between the time George & Steve's wife returned until the time WIFE & Steve returned. It is during that timeframe that knowone was witness except for the two parties directly involved. I believe that everything Geaorge witnessed has already been relayed to MITYH.

Yeah, but maybe Steve's wife, who is a loose girl in her own right, told George a few things about her husband, whom she WILLINGLY left alone with another woman who happened to grab her own husband's junk under her own supervision, on the walk back. Maybe that's why George and not #3 admonished ManHat to go up there. Twice. #3 gave no such warning. Perhaps George and Steve's wife swapped info that only he has and not #3.Not proud of it, but I've blacked out and functioned more than I want to admit in life and I know this: I would MOST ASSUREDLY not give out rational, sane advice to a friend not once but twice about imminent danger. When I function in those states, others are keeping me from drinking antifreeze and having sex with their cat. I'm not dispensing wisdom in intervals.So George didn't black out and he does remember. And he was privy to a walkback with Steve's wife - which was probably a nice sized walk - in which they left a situation that was turning sexual and it was with her own husband. As far as I'm concerned, she greenlighted this to continue. Somebody needs to talk to her and find out why she'd just walk away from that and somebody needs to talk to George to find out what she told him. He remembers.

 

[Micon]

What information in the 2000+ posts so far is leading you people to believe that George knows more (from the reported short time he was present) than MITYH already knows. I could see if George didn't return for 5 minutes or so, but it has been said multiple times that George came back with Steve's wife shortly therafter. The huge lag was between the time George & Steve's wife returned until the time WIFE & Steve returned. It is during that timeframe that knowone was witness except for the two parties directly involved. I believe that everything Geaorge witnessed has already been relayed to MITYH.

Yeah, but maybe Steve's wife, who is a loose girl in her own right, told George a few things about her husband, whom she WILLINGLY left alone with another woman who happened to grab her own husband's junk under her own supervision, on the walk back. Maybe that's why George and not #3 admonished ManHat to go up there. Twice. #3 gave no such warning. Perhaps George and Steve's wife swapped info that only he has and not #3.Not proud of it, but I've blacked out and functioned more than I want to admit in life and I know this: I would MOST ASSUREDLY not give out rational, sane advice to a friend not once but twice about imminent danger. When I function in those states, others are keeping me from drinking antifreeze and having sex with their cat. I'm not dispensing wisdom in intervals.So George didn't black out and he does remember. And he was privy to a walkback with Steve's wife - which was probably a nice sized walk - in which they left a situation that was turning sexual and it was with her own husband. As far as I'm concerned, she greenlighted this to continue. Somebody needs to talk to her and find out why she'd just walk away from that and somebody needs to talk to George to find out what she told him. He remembers.

So you admit to wanting to drink antifreeze and have sex with cats when you over indulge in alcohol? Nice

 

[boots11234]

I CANT DO IT ANY LONGER!!!! I have read every post in this thread. I am sorry for MITYH problems BUT because I started reading this thread, my wife has left me, my cat has died (from me not feeding him), my kids dont know me and I have lost my job!!! I truely am sorry that MITYH wife played with Steves dongle, but because of it I have to play with my own dongle!!! Good luck MITYH, I will report back with updates from my counceling sessions with my wife BECAUSE OF THIS THREAD!!!

 

[BringItOn]

I CANT DO IT ANY LONGER!!!! I have read every post in this thread. I am sorry for MITYH problems BUT because I started reading this thread, my wife has left me, my cat has died (from me not feeding him), my kids dont know me and I have lost my job!!! I truely am sorry that MITYH wife played with Steves dongle, but because of it I have to play with my own dongle!!! Good luck MITYH, I will report back with updates from my counceling sessions with my wife BECAUSE OF THIS THREAD!!!

 

[Strumey]

I CANT DO IT ANY LONGER!!!! I have read every post in this thread. I am sorry for MITYH problems BUT because I started reading this thread, my wife has left me, my cat has died (from me not feeding him), my kids dont know me and I have lost my job!!! I truely am sorry that MITYH wife played with Steves dongle, but because of it I have to play with my own dongle!!! Good luck MITYH, I will report back with updates from my counceling sessions with my wife BECAUSE OF THIS THREAD!!!

 

[Strumey]

I'm not a frequent poster, but have been around since the cheatsheets.net days as a long-time lurker. I've sympathized with MITYH since page 2 when I got on this train, and have felt pretty bad for the guy while he was getting beat up for not "Mannning Up". I didn't understand why I felt like this since I too agreed that he should have done more, but I stepped back I found out why. MITYH and I are cut from the same cloth, so much so that it could have been me writing the original post. I have many similarities and traits; I live and work in southcentral WI, am probably around the same age, have similar group of friends, and am also far from an Alpha Male since I am passive (or alternately passive-aggressive), avoid confrontation in all but the most serious circumstances, am a "nice guy", and want to trust and believe in people despite evidence showing otherwise. I've been stepped on a few times and can physically defend myself if need be, but have never been in, nor hope to be in, a physical "fight" per se. I can see his rationalization for his actions throughout the process, since I too would likely rationalize and procede in much the same way. I have to say it's an inherent personality trait and it is what it is, it is neither good or bad, right or wrong. He or I will never be the loud, brash and overly confident Alpha Male that many are suggesting he become overnight. His wife chose to be with him knowing full well this is who he is, for better or worse and whether she "settled" or not is irrelevant.I find it hard to believe based on the tale woven that something didn't happen in the bathroom, and find it harder to believe that she doesn't remember. 'Deny to the bitter end' is what I've read over and over from those involved with infedelity, a convenient out is what it is. Hell, if I was in her shoes, I'd do the same thing if I didn't want a divorce and really just made a stupid mistake. Even if the right thing to do is to admit her guilt, spill the beans and beg forgiveness, I doubt she ever will. As others have mentioned, to find out exactly what happened, George needs to be interrigated and not let up until you get the answers you're looking for. ..And those who think George isn't a good friend or is evil, that's probably not the case either. As others have mentioned, George doesn't want to get in the middle, but there is more than that.. George probably doesn't want to hurt his pal MITYH and probably hopes that MITYH lives without the knowledge or finds out on his own that his wife is a cheating whore. In college, we had a close group of 4-5 guys who lived in two adjoining apartments. While the specifics escape me, there came to be some evidence or knowledge that one of the guys, Mike, was being cheated on by his girlfriend. To make matters worse, the dude she was cheating on was one of Mike's other friends that wasn't part of our group. The rest of us all knew about it, but no one had the balls to break Mike's heart with the news and all hoped he would find out on his own. It wasn't until my then -girlfriend (now wife), who knew Mike longer than me and knew Mike's girlfriend, told Mike that he found out. I think we all regret not telling him, but I think if we were asked direct, point-blank questions, we would have told him. Does that make us all A-holes? Yes, but we thought we had Mike's feelings in mind at the time. I still regret not telling him, but he forgave us knowing that we weren't intentially trying to F him over, it was only poor judgement.So my point being A) MITYH, go after George and don't let up. He wants you to know but is both a chicken-s hit and I think doesn't want you to feel the pain he knows you likely will, let him know it won't effect the relationship between you and George and that you will hold him in high regard for being a true friend and B) After you find out more of the story, determine what it means to you, assuming your wife remembers, feels awful and will never tell you the truth. I would think some counciling would be in order if nothing else. You're marriage will be starting from scratch in many ways and if you don't rebuild properly, you risk a complete collapse or lifelong animosity if you stay together. Stay strong man, I honestly feel for you and know you're doing what you think is right, no matter how what the masses here think you should do. Once taken to completion, let it go. Best of luck.JFT

This is a heck of a post, man. I hope MITYH appreciates the time you took to write it.

This guy should post more. Pretty blown away with that one.

very nice posting

 

[Penguin]

GM,

I agree with you to a point. Yes, Steve's wife was privey to what George saw, if not a little bit more. But the fact remains that MITYH said that they both returned long before WIFE & Steve. Sure there was conversation on the walk back but I doubt either no anything other than what #3 has already relayed to MINYH via George. It's impossible to know what was going through Steve's Wife's head, maybe she was so turned on that she didn't care. Maybe she saw some hijinks and didn't think it would go any farther, being drunk jaded her as to how serious or how far things were going, who knows... know one will ever know the answer to that.

 

[code]

 

[jpwest]

Is the wedding today?

 

[IvanKaramazov]

Is the wedding today?

 

[Capella]

Can anybody give a simple, concise update, or point me to a recent one?

 

[The Z Machine]

GM knows things, but he's had some better lines in other recent threads involving wives.

 

[top dog]

Can anybody give a simple, concise update, or point me to a recent one?

Sure. JFT Ben shoud post more often, BigTex posts some pretty angry stuff and boots11234 lost his wife, job and killed his cat over this thread.... Oh and a lot of

 

[Sheriff66]

I would take Steve off my Christmas card list for sure....

 

[avoiding injuries]

Can anybody give a simple, concise update, or point me to a recent one?

I posted this around page 27...Do a "CTRL + F" find function on each page and type in 1216(MIYH's member number). It will take you to all of his posts and not his quoted ones. This will give you the all of his updates and responses. I was able to catch up on the last 20 pages in 5 minutes doing this.

 

[prosopis]

I'm not a frequent poster, but have been around since the cheatsheets.net days as a long-time lurker. I've sympathized with MITYH since page 2 when I got on this train, and have felt pretty bad for the guy while he was getting beat up for not "Mannning Up". I didn't understand why I felt like this since I too agreed that he should have done more, but I stepped back I found out why. MITYH and I are cut from the same cloth, so much so that it could have been me writing the original post. I have many similarities and traits; I live and work in southcentral WI, am probably around the same age, have similar group of friends, and am also far from an Alpha Male since I am passive (or alternately passive-aggressive), avoid confrontation in all but the most serious circumstances, am a "nice guy", and want to trust and believe in people despite evidence showing otherwise. I've been stepped on a few times and can physically defend myself if need be, but have never been in, nor hope to be in, a physical "fight" per se. I can see his rationalization for his actions throughout the process, since I too would likely rationalize and procede in much the same way. I have to say it's an inherent personality trait and it is what it is, it is neither good or bad, right or wrong. He or I will never be the loud, brash and overly confident Alpha Male that many are suggesting he become overnight. His wife chose to be with him knowing full well this is who he is, for better or worse and whether she "settled" or not is irrelevant.I find it hard to believe based on the tale woven that something didn't happen in the bathroom, and find it harder to believe that she doesn't remember. 'Deny to the bitter end' is what I've read over and over from those involved with infedelity, a convenient out is what it is. Hell, if I was in her shoes, I'd do the same thing if I didn't want a divorce and really just made a stupid mistake. Even if the right thing to do is to admit her guilt, spill the beans and beg forgiveness, I doubt she ever will. As others have mentioned, to find out exactly what happened, George needs to be interrigated and not let up until you get the answers you're looking for. ..And those who think George isn't a good friend or is evil, that's probably not the case either. As others have mentioned, George doesn't want to get in the middle, but there is more than that.. George probably doesn't want to hurt his pal MITYH and probably hopes that MITYH lives without the knowledge or finds out on his own that his wife is a cheating whore. In college, we had a close group of 4-5 guys who lived in two adjoining apartments. While the specifics escape me, there came to be some evidence or knowledge that one of the guys, Mike, was being cheated on by his girlfriend. To make matters worse, the dude she was cheating on was one of Mike's other friends that wasn't part of our group. The rest of us all knew about it, but no one had the balls to break Mike's heart with the news and all hoped he would find out on his own. It wasn't until my then -girlfriend (now wife), who knew Mike longer than me and knew Mike's girlfriend, told Mike that he found out. I think we all regret not telling him, but I think if we were asked direct, point-blank questions, we would have told him. Does that make us all A-holes? Yes, but we thought we had Mike's feelings in mind at the time. I still regret not telling him, but he forgave us knowing that we weren't intentially trying to F him over, it was only poor judgement.So my point being A) MITYH, go after George and don't let up. He wants you to know but is both a chicken-s hit and I think doesn't want you to feel the pain he knows you likely will, let him know it won't effect the relationship between you and George and that you will hold him in high regard for being a true friend and B) After you find out more of the story, determine what it means to you, assuming your wife remembers, feels awful and will never tell you the truth. I would think some counciling would be in order if nothing else. You're marriage will be starting from scratch in many ways and if you don't rebuild properly, you risk a complete collapse or lifelong animosity if you stay together. Stay strong man, I honestly feel for you and know you're doing what you think is right, no matter how what the masses here think you should do. Once taken to completion, let it go. Best of luck.JFT

This is a heck of a post, man. I hope MITYH appreciates the time you took to write it.

This guy should post more. Pretty blown away with that one.

I dont know. In the first paragraph he says he avoids confrontations in all but the most serious circumstances. While I agree with this whole heartedly I believe MIYH has found himself in one of those most serious circumstances. I suppose that could be a subjective thing. I personally would put this at the top of my list of most serious circumstances.

 

[Shrek]

Rule #1: Never, ever, under ANY circumstances do you put your hands on another man's wife! Period!Rule #2: If Rule #1 occurs (it has in this case) you DON'T call the individual in question, you find his ##### ### and handle to Man to mother ####### Man.Rule #3: After Rule #2 has been accomplished find wife, put her ### on punishment. Then do what you have to do.Rule #4: If you can't handle your liquor consumption then don't ####### drink.Rule #5: Manup!Rule #6: This is total Bull####, somebody's ### would have to pay.

You forgot to sign this post.

 

[Shrek]

i can't believe this is 46 pages in 4 days and i'm still struggling to keep up. this thread must hold every all-time ffa record of rapid thread growth (if there were such a thing).

Averaging about one post every 2 minutes for the past 80 hours. Not bad.

What's the average if you account for the night time slowdown?I think this thread was on page two sometime after midnight last night.

Do you want the posts broken down by hour, or by sections of the day (morning 8-12, afternoon, 12-4, etc.)? I could also plot the location of the posts on Google Maps if you like.

This would be seriously cool.

 

[redman]

Summary?

That just about covers it, I think.

Holy crap!

 

[prosopis]

i can't believe this is 46 pages in 4 days and i'm still struggling to keep up. this thread must hold every all-time ffa record of rapid thread growth (if there were such a thing).

Averaging about one post every 2 minutes for the past 80 hours. Not bad.

What's the average if you account for the night time slowdown?I think this thread was on page two sometime after midnight last night.

Do you want the posts broken down by hour, or by sections of the day (morning 8-12, afternoon, 12-4, etc.)? I could also plot the location of the posts on Google Maps if you like.

This would be seriously cool.

I would like to see a google map of this.

 

[Kilgore Trout]

I'm not a frequent poster, but have been around since the cheatsheets.net days as a long-time lurker. I've sympathized with MITYH since page 2 when I got on this train, and have felt pretty bad for the guy while he was getting beat up for not "Mannning Up". I didn't understand why I felt like this since I too agreed that he should have done more, but I stepped back I found out why. MITYH and I are cut from the same cloth, so much so that it could have been me writing the original post. I have many similarities and traits; I live and work in southcentral WI, am probably around the same age, have similar group of friends, and am also far from an Alpha Male since I am passive (or alternately passive-aggressive), avoid confrontation in all but the most serious circumstances, am a "nice guy", and want to trust and believe in people despite evidence showing otherwise. I've been stepped on a few times and can physically defend myself if need be, but have never been in, nor hope to be in, a physical "fight" per se. I can see his rationalization for his actions throughout the process, since I too would likely rationalize and procede in much the same way. I have to say it's an inherent personality trait and it is what it is, it is neither good or bad, right or wrong. He or I will never be the loud, brash and overly confident Alpha Male that many are suggesting he become overnight. His wife chose to be with him knowing full well this is who he is, for better or worse and whether she "settled" or not is irrelevant.JFT

The only thing that really needs to be said at this point is "GROW A SACK". Your wife IS and HAS cheated on you. Wake up. Unless this behavior secretly turns you on then have some dignity and kick her ### to the curb.

What an interesting contrast in posts. FWIW, I'm much more like JFT and MITYH than people like Kais. Great post by JFT, and he's right, there is nothing wrong with being the nice trusting 'passive' guy.

 

[Chaka]

Rule #1: Never, ever, under ANY circumstances do you put your hands on another man's wife! Period!Rule #2: If Rule #1 occurs (it has in this case) you DON'T call the individual in question, you find his ##### ### and handle to Man to mother ####### Man.Rule #3: After Rule #2 has been accomplished find wife, put her ### on punishment. Then do what you have to do.Rule #4: If you can't handle your liquor consumption then don't ####### drink.Rule #5: Manup!Rule #6: This is total Bull####, somebody's ### would have to pay.

You forgot to sign this post.

In that case why shouldn't MIYH have to pay for not tending his own garden? Hey, here is a thought: perhaps MIHY and WIFE are in a bitter and loveless marriage that only is together because of the kids? The point is that there is more to this story than we know, jumping to violent conclusions is lowest form of response and we have not arrived at that point yet.Steve screwed up big time, there is no doubt about that. MIYH's WIFE also screwed up big time and there is no doubt about that. Having a blackout is NOT an excuse!!!But driving youself into an emotional frenzy and running around indiscriminately kicking people's ###es is how people who don't belong in jail end up there. And imposing some sort of neanderthal type punishment on your wife is equally stupid and will only serve to drive the final nail in the coffin of that marriage, if it hasn't happened already.MIYH if the marriage is salvageable, and that is what you want, then I strongly encourage you to focus your efforts upon that path and work with your wife to begin the healing. She is the one who betrayed you and she is the one you should be working with. If the marriage is over then I encourage you (equally as strong) to document every shred of evidence, consult a lawyer get affidavits from any possible witnesses, and focus on getting everything you want/need out of the divorce proceedings.I grieve for your situation but don't make it worse by resorting to violence. If you want to hurt Steve, tell his wife that he cheated on her. If you absolutely must resort to a physical confrontation with Steve then be sure to bring a couple rolls of quarters with you. I don't want you to get your ### kicked and the quarters will add a little something to your punches.

 

[Capella]

Can anybody give a simple, concise update, or point me to a recent one?

so anyways..

 

[tommyboy]

Can anybody give a simple, concise update, or point me to a recent one?

so anyways..

arggh....dude and wife and friends get plastered while camping, some people go to the camp outhouse and dudes wife goes with, ends up alone with player Steve, who is also married. Apparently Curious George gets to see the goods of Steves wife and Steve gets his pole handled by the dudes wife, at the very least. Steve and dudes wife gone for additional 15-30 minutes, all the while dude ignores warnings from friend Curious George to "go check on your wife". Next day dude grows a conscious and starts to wonder. Finds out gory details about his wife stroking Steves unit. Confronts wife, she says she blacked out. Still hasn't talked to Steve and believes his wife. Many people in this thread think wife is lying cheating whore. They are all supposed to reconvene at a wedding today, and dude will probably post Sunday night, meanwhile this is the largest circle jerk in the history of the world.

 

[HarryManback]

2000

 

[JerseyToughGuys]

Anyone have a recap of the last 10 pages or so? Anything new?

Last I tuned in the Mrs. still was claiming she amnesia regarding the old #### in hand bit.

 

[3C's]

2000

didn't think anyone would notice.

 

[Chaka]

I'm not a frequent poster, but have been around since the cheatsheets.net days as a long-time lurker. I've sympathized with MITYH since page 2 when I got on this train, and have felt pretty bad for the guy while he was getting beat up for not "Mannning Up". I didn't understand why I felt like this since I too agreed that he should have done more, but I stepped back I found out why. MITYH and I are cut from the same cloth, so much so that it could have been me writing the original post. I have many similarities and traits; I live and work in southcentral WI, am probably around the same age, have similar group of friends, and am also far from an Alpha Male since I am passive (or alternately passive-aggressive), avoid confrontation in all but the most serious circumstances, am a "nice guy", and want to trust and believe in people despite evidence showing otherwise. I've been stepped on a few times and can physically defend myself if need be, but have never been in, nor hope to be in, a physical "fight" per se. I can see his rationalization for his actions throughout the process, since I too would likely rationalize and procede in much the same way. I have to say it's an inherent personality trait and it is what it is, it is neither good or bad, right or wrong. He or I will never be the loud, brash and overly confident Alpha Male that many are suggesting he become overnight. His wife chose to be with him knowing full well this is who he is, for better or worse and whether she "settled" or not is irrelevant.

JFT

The only thing that really needs to be said at this point is "GROW A SACK".

Your wife IS and HAS cheated on you. Wake up. Unless this behavior secretly turns you on then have some dignity and kick her ### to the curb.

What an interesting contrast in posts. FWIW, I'm much more like JFT and MITYH than people like Kais. Great post by JFT, and he's right, there is nothing wrong with being the nice trusting 'passive' guy.

I disagree with that assertion, but only to an extent. There is nothing inherently wrong with it, no. But being a passive person comes with a set of realities that one must be self-aware of in order to manage. One is that you must choose friends and a mate who respect your qualities and are content with them. I stand by my description that in the wrong pack these people can easily find themselves prey for the dominant types if there is a certain dynamic. A wounded buffalo will not be taken advantage of by another buffalo... But if that buffalo decided to go chill out with a pride of lions, well, what do you think would happen?Passive people generally must surround themselves with complimentary people, not merely "friends" who feel an egotistical need to lord over, ridicule and abuse others (often out of character flaws or insecurities of their own). As far as a mate, if someone is going to be with a passive person they should be the sort that's sewn their wild oats and doesn't have any sense of regret for experiences missed. It should be someone mature, secure and confident in the fact that the life chosen comes with comfort, love and commitment that when embraced forms a different variety of happiness than with an Alpha sort or "Mr. Exciting."

Make no mistake that passive people come with a different instruction manual... And offer different positives to the world that can be appreciated or abused accordingly.

In this circumstance, a passive person was clearly trampled upon. His instinct is to shrug it off, but there is no dignity in that. In order to preserve his basic manhood and rights to the very basic foundation of what is his, he must step out of his comfort zone. In an ideal situation, passive people surround themselves with loyal people who step up and protect them, realizing that true friendships involve people whose differences compliment each other. In this case, those weaknesses were exploited and his choices are to either change the unhealthy dynamic by asserting himself within it, or leaving that dynamic for a new one. Whether his wife would come along is something a counselor should probably be involved in deciding...

But right now, after this, a passive MITYH... well that ship has sailed.

Actually I have seen several videos where the herd of buffalo turn on a pride of lions rescuing the buffalo in distress.I'm just sayin'.

 

[General Malaise]

I'm not a frequent poster, but have been around since the cheatsheets.net days as a long-time lurker. I've sympathized with MITYH since page 2 when I got on this train, and have felt pretty bad for the guy while he was getting beat up for not "Mannning Up". I didn't understand why I felt like this since I too agreed that he should have done more, but I stepped back I found out why. MITYH and I are cut from the same cloth, so much so that it could have been me writing the original post. I have many similarities and traits; I live and work in southcentral WI, am probably around the same age, have similar group of friends, and am also far from an Alpha Male since I am passive (or alternately passive-aggressive), avoid confrontation in all but the most serious circumstances, am a "nice guy", and want to trust and believe in people despite evidence showing otherwise. I've been stepped on a few times and can physically defend myself if need be, but have never been in, nor hope to be in, a physical "fight" per se. I can see his rationalization for his actions throughout the process, since I too would likely rationalize and procede in much the same way. I have to say it's an inherent personality trait and it is what it is, it is neither good or bad, right or wrong. He or I will never be the loud, brash and overly confident Alpha Male that many are suggesting he become overnight. His wife chose to be with him knowing full well this is who he is, for better or worse and whether she "settled" or not is irrelevant.I find it hard to believe based on the tale woven that something didn't happen in the bathroom, and find it harder to believe that she doesn't remember. 'Deny to the bitter end' is what I've read over and over from those involved with infedelity, a convenient out is what it is. Hell, if I was in her shoes, I'd do the same thing if I didn't want a divorce and really just made a stupid mistake. Even if the right thing to do is to admit her guilt, spill the beans and beg forgiveness, I doubt she ever will. As others have mentioned, to find out exactly what happened, George needs to be interrigated and not let up until you get the answers you're looking for. ..And those who think George isn't a good friend or is evil, that's probably not the case either. As others have mentioned, George doesn't want to get in the middle, but there is more than that.. George probably doesn't want to hurt his pal MITYH and probably hopes that MITYH lives without the knowledge or finds out on his own that his wife is a cheating whore. In college, we had a close group of 4-5 guys who lived in two adjoining apartments. While the specifics escape me, there came to be some evidence or knowledge that one of the guys, Mike, was being cheated on by his girlfriend. To make matters worse, the dude she was cheating on was one of Mike's other friends that wasn't part of our group. The rest of us all knew about it, but no one had the balls to break Mike's heart with the news and all hoped he would find out on his own. It wasn't until my then -girlfriend (now wife), who knew Mike longer than me and knew Mike's girlfriend, told Mike that he found out. I think we all regret not telling him, but I think if we were asked direct, point-blank questions, we would have told him. Does that make us all A-holes? Yes, but we thought we had Mike's feelings in mind at the time. I still regret not telling him, but he forgave us knowing that we weren't intentially trying to F him over, it was only poor judgement.So my point being A) MITYH, go after George and don't let up. He wants you to know but is both a chicken-s hit and I think doesn't want you to feel the pain he knows you likely will, let him know it won't effect the relationship between you and George and that you will hold him in high regard for being a true friend and B) After you find out more of the story, determine what it means to you, assuming your wife remembers, feels awful and will never tell you the truth. I would think some counciling would be in order if nothing else. You're marriage will be starting from scratch in many ways and if you don't rebuild properly, you risk a complete collapse or lifelong animosity if you stay together. Stay strong man, I honestly feel for you and know you're doing what you think is right, no matter how what the masses here think you should do. Once taken to completion, let it go. Best of luck.JFT

This is a heck of a post, man. I hope MITYH appreciates the time you took to write it.

This guy should post more. Pretty blown away with that one.

I dont know. In the first paragraph he says he avoids confrontations in all but the most serious circumstances. While I agree with this whole heartedly I believe MIYH has found himself in one of those most serious circumstances. I suppose that could be a subjective thing. I personally would put this at the top of my list of most serious circumstances.

I read that as a guy trying to shed some light on the situation by giving a psychological profile of himself, who he sees as similar to ManHat. Guys like this aren't prone to confrontation and while we all agree this is pretty serious, it's a lot lot harder for ManHat to go Rambo on a guy than it is for say, you or DJColts.

 

[General Malaise]

Rule #1: Never, ever, under ANY circumstances do you put your hands on another man's wife! Period!

Rule #2: If Rule #1 occurs (it has in this case) you DON'T call the individual in question, you find his ##### ### and handle to Man to mother ####### Man.

Rule #3: After Rule #2 has been accomplished find wife, put her ### on punishment. Then do what you have to do.

Rule #4: If you can't handle your liquor consumption then don't ####### drink.

Rule #5: Manup!

Rule #6: This is total Bull####, somebody's ### would have to pay.

You forgot to sign this post.

In that case why shouldn't MIYH have to pay for not tending his own garden? Hey, here is a thought: perhaps MIHY and WIFE are in a bitter and loveless marriage that only is together because of the kids? The point is that there is more to this story than we know, jumping to violent conclusions is lowest form of response and we have not arrived at that point yet.Steve screwed up big time, there is no doubt about that. MIYH's WIFE also screwed up big time and there is no doubt about that. Having a blackout is NOT an excuse!!!

But driving youself into an emotional frenzy and running around indiscriminately kicking people's ###es is how people who don't belong in jail end up there. And imposing some sort of neanderthal type punishment on your wife is equally stupid and will only serve to drive the final nail in the coffin of that marriage, if it hasn't happened already.

MIYH if the marriage is salvageable, and that is what you want, then I strongly encourage you to focus your efforts upon that path and work with your wife to begin the healing. She is the one who betrayed you and she is the one you should be working with. If the marriage is over then I encourage you (equally as strong) to document every shred of evidence, consult a lawyer get affidavits from any possible witnesses, and focus on getting everything you want/need out of the divorce proceedings.

I grieve for your situation but don't make it worse by resorting to violence. If you want to hurt Steve, tell his wife that he cheated on her.

If you absolutely must resort to a physical confrontation with Steve then be sure to bring a couple rolls of quarters with you. I don't want you to get your ### kicked and the quarters will add a little something to your punches.

And then after you get your ### kicked, you can play hours of Galaga.

 

[Angry Beavers]

GM:

Did you cancel your camping trip to stay up to date on this thread - I hope not!

AB

 

[Steve Tasker]

Can anybody give a simple, concise update, or point me to a recent one?

so anyways..

arggh....dude and wife and friends get plastered while camping, some people go to the camp outhouse and dudes wife goes with, ends up alone with player Steve, who is also married. Apparently Curious George gets to see the goods of Steves wife and Steve gets his pole handled by the dudes wife, at the very least. Steve and dudes wife gone for additional 15-30 minutes, all the while dude ignores warnings from friend Curious George to "go check on your wife". Next day dude grows a conscious and starts to wonder. Finds out gory details about his wife stroking Steves unit. Confronts wife, she says she blacked out. Still hasn't talked to Steve and believes his wife. Many people in this thread think wife is lying cheating whore. They are all supposed to reconvene at a wedding today, and dude will probably post Sunday night, meanwhile this is the largest circle jerk in the history of the world.

That's a pretty accurate description.

 

[hotdogcollars]

sleep with Steve's wife at the wedding...report back...that is all

 

[Dragons]

GM, I agree with you to a point. Yes, Steve's wife was privey to what George saw, if not a little bit more. But the fact remains that MITYH said that they both returned long before WIFE & Steve. Sure there was conversation on the walk back but I doubt either no anything other than what #3 has already relayed to MINYH via George. It's impossible to know what was going through Steve's Wife's head, maybe she was so turned on that she didn't care. Maybe she saw some hijinks and didn't think it would go any farther, being drunk jaded her as to how serious or how far things were going, who knows... know one will ever know the answer to that.

The main reason to talk to George is to make sure what he said that night was 100% true and not some sort of gag. You know, the sort of gag that the OP thought George was actually playing that night? Since then, George claims to remember nothing, which could indicate he's trying to stay out of it, or it could indicate that he made a joke when he returned from the bathroom that he doesn't remember making. Guy #3 claims George said more about what happened, but that isn't confirmed and as far as we know, guy #3 could be messing around with the OP since he doesn't know the seriousness of the situation. Going to guy #3 in a joking manner is a great way to get him to open up, but there's also a chance to get a load of BS instead of seriousness.As far as I can tell, the OP doesn't KNOW anything. He suspects something happened and suspects some of the details (George said your wife held Steve while he went to the bathroom), but he needs verification to confront Steve or to know how to handle things with his wife. Guy #3 saying George said X does not necessarily make it true.My advice still is to first talk to guy #3. Make sure he's being serious with what George said. George then needs to confirm that this is in fact what happened before you can know for sure. Because it's still possible that George could have been joking from the outset. Confronting Steve physically may satisfy some primitive urge, but it's going to make the OP look foolish if this turns out to be a bad joke that got out of hand.Information is king. There's no reason not to exhaust the sources of information that are out there before acting.For what it's worth, I think the likelihood of this starting as a gag is fairly low. But it's definitely high enough to pursue AND it may fill in some blanks as talking to guy #3 seems to have done.