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Missing money in my home... (1 Viewer)

I

I love my screen name

Footballguy
Recently we have had money end up missing in our home. The money was taken from 2 different locations in the house. We have a couple of home health care nurses that watch my 4 year old son and are at home alone most of the time during the day. I'm trying to come up with a good plan on how to address this. The nurses are very caring of my son, one more than the other, from what I can tell. They have been a part of my son and our lives for about 1 1/2 years and this is the 1st time I have noticed this happen.

So far I wrote a note on our communication board that reads "just as a reminder the other 2 bedrooms are off limits...no exceptions!!!" I figured this alone would raise enough questions to get the guilty one to stop or at least think we are on to them. Also I would think the one that begins to ask a lot of questions or seem overly concerned is probably the guilty one.

Any advice on how to handle this situation would be greatly appreciated. I really don't want to have either one lose there job over this. I realize we all come across tough times in our lives. But I'm really disappointed as one set of money was a gift to my youngest daughter. She told me 2 days ago that she only had $2 left, this is when I 1st noticed. Today I checked my fantasy football winnings that are in my bedroom and half the money is gone.

 
If you found these home care workers through a franchise agency, they are making **** for the work they do for you. The franchise keeps around half of what you pay for their services. A lot of them are desperate for money.

 
How much are we talking about? Also, i will never understand why anyone would keep cash laying around. Keep 3-500 in you wallet. That is more than enough.

 
Buy a small inexpensive camera and mount it on the wall facing the place where money is. You don't need to connect it to anything. It'll scare any amateurs off.

However, if you want to catch the perp, then leave some money coated with powder which glows under UV light. Then, as soon as you arrive, check the box where the money is, and if any is missing, you can ask the perp to place her hand under the scanner.

 
Casually inform them that you rub iocaine powder on all cash that you have and that if they happen to come across any, they should ask you for the antidote.

 
You lost the element of surprise by writing the note. But I'd still try to set them up individually. Put more money in the hiding spot and double check the amount, making a note of the contents.

If it's missing and there was only one person who had access to it then you interrogate them. Her anxiety level will be high, especially if the stolen money is in her pocket or purse. Cameras would be a bonus but aren't necessarily needed.

Make darn sure it wasn't the kid who found it (I get it, he's 4) or that your wife "borrowed" it but was going to put it back because she knew you'd be pissed. Basically, if you eliminate all the ways it could've legitimately been removed, what you're left with is that it was stolen. Knowing this fact gives you power in the conversation.

Do not divulge what you know. Start with something like, "Is there anything you'd like to tell me about?"

When you say you don't want her fired, that's troubling to me when she's tasked with watching your child's well-being. If she does this what else is she doing?

 
Id go the other way. Get them in a room and say you appreciate their help more than they can imagine and you want them to know you care about their well being. And if they need a hand to meet with you in private and you can help , but you won't abide by stealing.

 
johnnyrock62000 said:
You lost the element of surprise by writing the note. But I'd still try to set them up individually. Put more money in the hiding spot and double check the amount, making a note of the contents.

If it's missing and there was only one person who had access to it then you interrogate them. Her anxiety level will be high, especially if the stolen money is in her pocket or purse. Cameras would be a bonus but aren't necessarily needed.

Make darn sure it wasn't the kid who found it (I get it, he's 4) or that your wife "borrowed" it but was going to put it back because she knew you'd be pissed. Basically, if you eliminate all the ways it could've legitimately been removed, what you're left with is that it was stolen. Knowing this fact gives you power in the conversation.

Do not divulge what you know. Start with something like, "Is there anything you'd like to tell me about?"

When you say you don't want her fired, that's troubling to me when she's tasked with watching your child's well-being. If she does this what else is she doing?
Click to expand...
I used to think that way, but then I figured out that the aliens who abducted me used to steal some of my singles on the way out of my bedroom each night. I'm not really sure why, but I like to think that maybe they'd hit 7-11 for a Big Gulp on the way out of town.

 
Offer a reward. Then bust her, because the one that turns over the money is obviously the thief and doesn't deserve any reward.

 
It wasn't anyone that lives in the house. The money has been in the same spot for at least 6 months. My 4 year old son is not physically capable of taking it. My youngest daughter is the one that mentioned to me that she had no more money, except for $2. I told her that if she brought me the money we would go to the store right now so she could spend it. I know her well enough that if she had it she would have told me right then. There was more money in my bedroom, they only took part of the money, still leaving a few hundred. I questioned my oldest daughter about the money, she knows how I feel about people lying too me even when it involves a bad situation like stealing. She knows if she is honest everything will turn out better than if I find out on my own. I have no trust issues with her. Now the wife has mentioned to me previously about a few suspicious things involving personal items of hers either being moved or disappearing. I kind of just ignored things then but now I'm curious. I don't see her taking the money.

 
I love my screen name said:
It wasn't anyone that lives in the house. The money has been in the same spot for at least 6 months. My 4 year old son is not physically capable of taking it. My youngest daughter is the one that mentioned to me that she had no more money, except for $2. I told her that if she brought me the money we would go to the store right now so she could spend it. I know her well enough that if she had it she would have told me right then. There was more money in my bedroom, they only took part of the money, still leaving a few hundred. I questioned my oldest daughter about the money, she knows how I feel about people lying too me even when it involves a bad situation like stealing. She knows if she is honest everything will turn out better than if I find out on my own. I have no trust issues with her. Now the wife has mentioned to me previously about a few suspicious things involving personal items of hers either being moved or disappearing. I kind of just ignored things then but now I'm curious. I don't see her taking the money.
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The money may just be the tip of the iceberg. By the time you catch someone stealing it's not the first time. Think about what else may be missing. If you ask the suspicious one if she took $140 and she admits to it, or you ask her if she needs a helping hand to just ask you, she'll admit to the $140. You'll think, "Aha! I caught her." But you'll never know how much she stole and she'll be happy you're only calling her out on the $140, if she admits it at all. She'll deny deny deny. That's why you need irrefutable evidence when you talk with her. Denials don't work when you know they're guilty.

 
T Bell said:
johnnyrock62000 said:
You lost the element of surprise by writing the note. But I'd still try to set them up individually. Put more money in the hiding spot and double check the amount, making a note of the contents.

If it's missing and there was only one person who had access to it then you interrogate them. Her anxiety level will be high, especially if the stolen money is in her pocket or purse. Cameras would be a bonus but aren't necessarily needed.

Make darn sure it wasn't the kid who found it (I get it, he's 4) or that your wife "borrowed" it but was going to put it back because she knew you'd be pissed. Basically, if you eliminate all the ways it could've legitimately been removed, what you're left with is that it was stolen. Knowing this fact gives you power in the conversation.

Do not divulge what you know. Start with something like, "Is there anything you'd like to tell me about?"

When you say you don't want her fired, that's troubling to me when she's tasked with watching your child's well-being. If she does this what else is she doing?
Click to expand...
I used to think that way, but then I figured out that the aliens who abducted me used to steal some of my singles on the way out of my bedroom each night. I'm not really sure why, but I like to think that maybe they'd hit 7-11 for a Big Gulp on the way out of town.
Click to expand...
I used to do a little detecting, and when you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, no matter how improbable, must be the truth. (Sherlock).

 
Hide your money better. When you allow strangers in your home you have to worry about this sort of thing. No matter how long you know someone you never really know them

 
If your daughters buy some expensive $10 ear rings at Claires... I'd focus on them. If they are rolling with some new bling for their iPhones or have new $4.99 apps on their phones... its on them. If those girls have matching colorful shoelaces... they're working as a team. Tread carefully.

 
Maybe sit them both down and tell them you know money is missing ...if it happens again, you will call the police. You might find out which one it was by the reaction. If not, it could be enough to stop them. Let the earlier losses go.

 
The kids don't go anywhere without me or their mom so we would know if they were buying anything. Lunch is the only thing they pay for when we aren't with them.

I realize I should have handled the money differently, I let my guard down.

Now I'm just trying to come up with a good plan on how to address this, so maybe someone will confess.

I thought the note on the board would get one/both of them asking what is going on. I could then tell them that I have noticed some items missing and see what their reactions are. I have no evidence that it was either one of them but my gut tells me one of them did it.

My first thought was to tell them if the items weren't replaced by the end of the week that I would have both of them replaced by new nurses...not sure I really want to handle it this way.

 
I love my screen name said:
The kids don't go anywhere without me or their mom so we would know if they were buying anything. Lunch is the only thing they pay for when we aren't with them.

I realize I should have handled the money differently, I let my guard down.

Now I'm just trying to come up with a good plan on how to address this, so maybe someone will confess.

I thought the note on the board would get one/both of them asking what is going on. I could then tell them that I have noticed some items missing and see what their reactions are. I have no evidence that it was either one of them but my gut tells me one of them did it.

My first thought was to tell them if the items weren't replaced by the end of the week that I would have both of them replaced by new nurses...not sure I really want to handle it this way.
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Im assuming they eat lunch at your home. Some sodium pentathol in their food would get this sorted out

 
If it's one of the nurses, (and you are clearly convinced it is), you're just going to piss off the honest one and ruin the working relationship anyway. Time to cut ties and replace them both before you lose something irreplaceable, like an heirloom ring, watch etc.

The thief isn't going to come clean and is just going to lie to your face regardless, and if the theft is to support a drug habit, it isn't going to stop.

If they have keys, change the locks.

 
I love my screen name said:
The kids don't go anywhere without me or their mom so we would know if they were buying anything. Lunch is the only thing they pay for when we aren't with them.

I realize I should have handled the money differently, I let my guard down.

Now I'm just trying to come up with a good plan on how to address this, so maybe someone will confess.

I thought the note on the board would get one/both of them asking what is going on. I could then tell them that I have noticed some items missing and see what their reactions are. I have no evidence that it was either one of them but my gut tells me one of them did it.

My first thought was to tell them if the items weren't replaced by the end of the week that I would have both of them replaced by new nurses...not sure I really want to handle it this way.
Click to expand...
Exact opposite of what you should do. Many business owners make the same mistake.
 
Before you up and fire them you really should try and figure out the guilty party and use the hand you've gained for something. I can't think of anything right now, but surely they have something you might want.

 
I had a similar issue and suspected one of the home health nurses. I ended up putting a sign inside the drawer where the money was kept that read, "The contents of this drawer are now being monitored daily."

That did the trick.

 
Maybe it's a glitch in the Matrix.

Do not ask how money disappears - that's impossible (unless you're at a strip club). Instead, simply know, there is no money.

 
Have you noticed anything out of the ordinary, such as one of the kids coming home on a new big wheel or lavishly eating name brand cereal?

 
If you're leaving money "around", note the serial numbers. Then, if you go home and any is missing, you can immediately confront them and check to see if they have any of the bills.

 
brohan you can them both and start over that is the only option fire them and then when people call for references say something mysterical like yeah brohan they were nice and you should hire them if you do not like having your money not stolen and the guy on the other end will be like wait what did that guy just say and then you hang up and the guy will wonder if the call ever happened at all or maybe it was just a dream and maybe there is an alien that is one to grow on em night shamaron style take that to the bank brohan

 
cactus said:
I had a similar issue and suspected one of the home health nurses. I ended up putting a sign inside the drawer where the money was kept that read, "The contents of this drawer are now being monitored daily."

That did the trick.
Click to expand...
This is great except you still have a thief in your house who is entrusted with taking care of your son. So they stop stealing money from the drawer but steal something else. A thief is a thief. Sure you can take away easy opportunities to steal but I wouldn't count on it. Figure out which one it is and fire her. Be careful not to paint both gals with the same brush unless they're both guilty.

 
SWC said:
brohan you can them both and start over that is the only option fire them and then when people call for references say something mysterical like yeah brohan they were nice and you should hire them if you do not like having your money not stolen and the guy on the other end will be like wait what did that guy just say and then you hang up and the guy will wonder if the call ever happened at all or maybe it was just a dream and maybe there is an alien that is one to grow on em night shamaron style take that to the bank brohan
Click to expand...
I remember when the swc schtick was fresh & cool. I think it needs some hibernation

 
Speak with them and explain the situation, tell them they will need to submit to a short lie detector test in order to stay employed and keep the police uninvolved.

 
Dreamer said:
Speak with them and explain the situation, tell them they will need to submit to a short lie detector test in order to stay employed and keep the police uninvolved.
Click to expand...
First off polygraphs aren't accurate. Second off I am thinking it's expensive. Just get a couple of nanny cams. You can get them hidden in various items. Put one in each off limits bedroom, check when you get home. Pretty straightforward.

 
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