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Need a biblical sounding phrase for a Christmas card. (1 Viewer)

Fear The Turtle

Fear The Turtle

Footballguy
I have a photo of my daughter standing atop a camel that I want to use for our holiday card. I thought it would be easy to locate a line in the Bible with the word camel in it that I could put on the card but I've found that's not the case. Maybe I missed one. In any event, if someone could find one or make one up, I'd appreciate it. Keep it clean. This IS someone's daughter.

Thanks.

 
“it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God” (Mat. 19 v 24)

“Blind leaders of the blind, who strain at a gnat and swallow a camel!” (Mat. 23 v 24)

 
Fear The Turtle said:
I have a photo of my daughter standing atop a camel that I want to use for our holiday card. I thought it would be easy to locate a line in the Bible with the word camel in it that I could put on the card but I've found that's not the case. Maybe I missed one. In any event, if someone could find one or make one up, I'd appreciate it. Keep it clean. This IS someone's daughter.

Thanks.
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Camel may be difficult. 

Maybe cast a wider net with desert?

 
Have some guts, quote the Koran. It’s a much better fit for the photo

This is the she-camel of Allah sent to you as a sign. So leave her to eat within Allah 's land and do not touch her with harm, lest there seize you a painful punishment.

 
After Jesus was born in Bethlehem in Judea, in the time of King Herod, wise men from the East came to Jerusalem saying, “Where is the one who is born king of the Jews? For we saw his star when it rose and have come to worship him.”  Matthew 2:1-2

It's long, and you might want to strikethrough "men" and put in girls for fun, but it fits the pic.  Most picture the magi on camels.

 
facook said:
After Jesus was born in Bethlehem in Judea, in the time of King Herod, wise men from the East came to Jerusalem saying, “Where is the one who is born king of the Jews? For we saw his star when it rose and have come to worship him.”  Matthew 2:1-2

It's long, and you might want to strikethrough "men" and put in girls for fun, but it fits the pic.  Most picture the magi on camels.
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Changing Bible verses?

Pretty sure that's eternal damnation 

 
facook said:
After Jesus was born in Bethlehem in Judea, in the time of King Herod, wise men from the East came to Jerusalem saying, “Where is the one who is born king of the Jews? For we saw his star when it rose and have come to worship him.”  Matthew 2:1-2

It's long, and you might want to strikethrough "men" and put in girls for fun, but it fits the pic.  Most picture the magi on camels.
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Right. When I began my search that's what I thought I would find: a phrase about the magi riding their camels from the East, etc. No such luck.

 
And I looked, and behold a pale horse: and his name that sat upon him was Death and Hell followed with him. And power was given unto them over the fourth part of the earth, to kill with the sword, and with hunger, and with deathand with the beasts of the earth

 
ProstheticRGK said:
Camel has the smooth taste kids love. Joe Camel 6:13
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This reminds me of a story. 

When I was fresh out of college I worked for DeWalt tools. We sponsored a hydroplane boat team. At that time Camel also sponsored a boat. We were at a race in Madison, Indiana, and as part of our DeWalt duties we had a booth to show off tools, run contests, give away swag, etc.

Camel had a couple of hotties walking around greeting people, so they sashayed over to our booth. I took a picture with both of them - one on each arm. I then turned that into my Christmas card that year with the saying:

"I'm Not Sure These Are the Camels the Wise Men Rode on Their Journey."

It was a great hit.   :lol:

Probably wouldn't be appropriate for the OP, but he has my permission to alter that saying to suit his card. 

 
Make it more interactive. Add a dotted line around the image in the shape of a mistletoe, to guide for them to cut it out.  
 

Then just need to add the line “Hang and kiss under the Cameltoe all holiday season. Merry Xmas!”

 
Interviewer: Good evening. Tonight we're going to take a hard tough abrasive look at camel spotting. Hello.

Spotter: Hello Peter.

Interviewer: Now tell me, what exactly are you doing?

Spotter: Er well, I'm camel spotting. I'm spotting to see if there are any camels that I can spot, and put them down in my camel spotting book.

Interviewer: Good. And how many camels have you spotted so far?

Spotter: Oh, well so far Peter, up to the present moment, I've spotted nearly, ooh, nearly one.

Interviewer: Nearly one?

Spotter: Er, call it none.

Interviewer: Fine. And er how long have you been here?

Spotter: Three years.

Interviewer: So, in, er, three years you've spotted no camels?

Spotter: Yes in only three years. Er, I tell a lie, four, be fair, five. I've been camel spotting for just the seven years. Before that of course I was a Yeti spotter.

Interviewer: A Yeti spotter, that must have been extremely interesting.

Spotter: Oh, it was extremely interesting, very, very - quite... it was dull; dull, dull, dull, oh God it was dull. Sitting in the Waterloo waiting room. Course once you've seen one Yeti you've seen them all.

Interviewer: And have you seen them all?

Spotter: Well I've seen one. Well a little one... a picture of a... I've heard about them.

Interviewer: Well, now tell me, what do you do when you spot a camel?

Spotter: Er, I take its number.

Interviewer: Camels don't have numbers.

Spotter: Ah, well you've got to know where to look. Er, they're on the side of the engine above the piston box.

Interviewer: What?

Spotter: Ah - of course you've got to make sure it's not a dromedary. 'Cos if it's a dromedary it goes in the dromedary book.

Interviewer: Well how do you tell if it's a dromedary?

Spotter: Ah well, a dromedary has one hump and a camel has a refreshment car, buffet, and ticket collector.

Interviewer: Mr Sopwith, aren't you in fact a train spotter?

Spotter: What?

Interviewer: Don't you in fact spot trains?

Spotter: Oh, you're no fun anymore.
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This one's a bit wordy, though not as wordy as the post above this one, and I think it fits in the spirit of biblical sounding...

And, finally: The traveler came upon a giant footprint that he found… and he spaketh that this truly MUST be… the hand of God. And he was confuseth. He went to the foot of the mountain, and he cried, “Confused at last! Confused at last! Lou! LOU, Mr. Fields wants the rent!” We are confused at last.

Of course you can change the "he" to "she", but then you're talking a walk on the wild side instead of the wildlife side.

 
Fear The Turtle said:
I have a photo of my daughter standing atop a camel that I want to use for our holiday card. I thought it would be easy to locate a line in the Bible with the word camel in it that I could put on the card but I've found that's not the case. Maybe I missed one. In any event, if someone could find one or make one up, I'd appreciate it. Keep it clean. This IS someone's daughter.

Thanks.
Click to expand...
This has got some good uns...

A Charlie Brown Christmas Linus Speech

For behold I bring you tidings of great joy.  Which shall be to all people.

For unto you, born this day in the city of David a savior...

 
"First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin. Then shalt thou count to three, no more, no less. Three shall be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who, being naughty in My sight, shall snuff it."

 
hagmania said:
Wait a second - standing?
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Oh, yes, she's pretty athletic. I have another of her riding the camel. She looks great in it and would probably prefer we use that one but her camel's face is cut off in the photo and the camel behind her looks like he's sniffing her butt so that's out...unless FFA can make it happen!

 
"The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of the darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy My brothers. And you will know I am the Lord when I lay My vengeance upon you."

 
Fear The Turtle said:
Oh, yes, she's pretty athletic. I have another of her riding the camel. She looks great in it and would probably prefer we use that one but her camel's face is cut off in the photo and the camel behind her looks like he's sniffing her butt so that's out...unless FFA can make it happen!
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My humps….my humps, my humps, my humps....my lovely Christmas lumps.  Check it out.  

 
"He comforts all her waste places and makes her wilderness like Eden, her desert like the garden of the Lord; joy and gladness will be found in her, thanksgiving and the voice of song."

 
Now after Jesus was born in Bethlehem of Judea in the days of Herod the king, behold, wise men from the east came to Jerusalem, saying, “Where is he who has been born king of the Jews? For we saw his star when it rose and have come to worship him.”
Matthew 2:1-2

That's your best bet. :shrug:

 
Jayrod said:
Now after Jesus was born in Bethlehem of Judea in the days of Herod the king, behold, wise men from the east came to Jerusalem, saying, “Where is he who has been born king of the Jews? For we saw his star when it rose and have come to worship him.”
Matthew 2:1-2

That's your best bet. :shrug:
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Dynamite idea. 

 
"Please always remember and don't ever forget: It is the wise man who ducks before the camel spits."

 
And the beast shall be huge and black, and the eyes thereof red with the blood of living creatures, and the whore of Babylon shall ride forth on a three-headed serpent, and throughout the lands, there'll be a great rubbing of parts

 
And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness: and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over the cattle, and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth. - Genesis 1:26

Maybe paraphrase:

”let them have dominion over. . . every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth“

 (or use a non-King James version to change the creepeth, but I’m old school liketh that)

She’s standing on a camel for heaven’s sake. 

 
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