***Official*** FFA iDating Thread (3 Viewers)

[jason12vb]

So, amidst this long thread there were a lot of good nuggets of info from past iDating veterans. One of the tips was that a guy who writes a lot in his profile and goes into great detail, descriptive words and witty lines is going to stand out amongst the crowd. Gives the women something to attach and react to and shows you're putting some thought and effort into it (which is attractive for the hot and smart ones).

I have a great profile writeup, but am actually worried that it may almost be too long (and no, I'm not posting it here for you vultures to attack it). I sent it to Early 10 last week for her female perspective and she hasn't responded yet....maybe she stil hasn't finished reading the diatribe??

Does there come a point where it's just too much? I just looked at my profile on my phone app and the scrolling needed to fully get through my info weirded me out a little bit.

Yes, there is such a thing as too much. People think putting it all out there gives them hope that someone will find something in their profile they can relate to, but in reality, I think it only takes one hobby, misfired joke, or baggage-type-remark to turn someone off and make them move on. Put some effort in to show you have a sense of humor and know how to write, but don't give them a book....save that for getting to know them. They already got past the pics and are interested.

 

[Early_10]

Grammar is super important. I don't even read the profile once a guy screws up then/than. There are so many men that it's easy to just drop one for something simple. Can't possibly communicate with them all.

My profile is short and almost #####y. Still get tons of messages. I don't think men read anything past the pics.

 

[Early_10]

Offdee wrote a damn novel.. It was several pages long...not even your mother wants to know that much about you guy.

 

[offdee]

Offdee wrote a damn novel.. It was several pages long...not even your mother wants to know that much about you guy.

I edited it down quite a bit. It's doing well

 

[St. Louis Bob]

E10!!!

 

[Joe T]

Okay, girls who are smiling in all of their photos (6 or 7 pics) but are not showing teeth in any photo... what's the ruling here?

 

[ntz08]

Okay, girls who are smiling in all of their photos (6 or 7 pics) but are not showing teeth in any photo... what's the ruling here?

Bad teeth...possibly British.

 

[offdee]

Been on OKCupid for a few weeks now and pretty decent experience. Seeing two brick and mortar women sporadically (26 and 28) and two OKC women sporadically (30 and 31). Metup with another one from OKC for initial drinks (30)...cute, tight body, professional dancer but just wasn't feeling it and I cut the night short.

The reason I post this is because of the phenomenon I've experienced with every single one of them....in no way did they them make any effort whatsoever to even offer to pay for a drink here and there. I wouldn't let them anyways, but just simply inquiring and a simple thank you when all is said and done would be nice. I don't worry about it too much, but interesting to me they all just assume I'm paying for everything everytime we get together. Luckily a few of them have paid with clothes strewn about my bedroom later that night so that's a decent tradeoff. I'm having fun, but dating is not cheap...can't imagine the chumps that mix in dinner in the first couple of meetings. Luckily I'm a FBG so money isn't a problem.

 

[offdee]

The other intestesting thing is that all 3 that I met up with on OKC actually ended up looking better in person than in their pics. Last nigh hung out with a 30 yr old black girl...pics were cute, but she was gorgeous in person. Light brown skin with green eyes. 30 yrs old with an 8 yr. old son though....always something.

 

[zed2283]

Because women always expect you to pay. Equality only matters when they are receiving.

 

[offdee]

Because women always expect you to pay. Equality only matters when they are receiving.

I get that, and would never actually let them pay at these beginning dating stages, but at least make an attempt to offer.

My last relationship was with a 41 yr old (I'm 37)....the difference in this area is night and day with all of these 26-31 yr olds I've recently been seeing.

 

[Joe T]

Why are there so many hefties on these sites?

 

[offdee]

Why are there so many hefties on these sites?

Because there are more ugly/fat women in the world than there are good looking/in shape women. It's just statistics.

 

[Major]

Because women always expect you to pay. Equality only matters when they are receiving.

I get that, and would never actually let them pay at these beginning dating stages, but at least make an attempt to offer.

My last relationship was with a 41 yr old (I'm 37)....the difference in this area is night and day with all of these 26-31 yr olds I've recently been seeing.

Would be a quality neg though. Make a hot chick pay on the first date

 

[offdee]

Because women always expect you to pay. Equality only matters when they are receiving.

I get that, and would never actually let them pay at these beginning dating stages, but at least make an attempt to offer.

My last relationship was with a 41 yr old (I'm 37)....the difference in this area is night and day with all of these 26-31 yr olds I've recently been seeing.

Would be a quality neg though. Make a hot chick pay on the first date

Problem is you'd never get playtime that night or a second date. Coming off as cheap on the initial first impressions date is probably worse than being unattractive or no sense of humor whatsoever.

In the first meeting bar world I've done it though with success. "you should buy me a drink so we can continue our time together."

Or when dealing with those women that ask you to buy them a drink..."nah, I don't buy women I don't know anything about drinks. You can buy me one though while you tell me about yourself, and I'll then owe you one later."

 

[Major]

Because women always expect you to pay. Equality only matters when they are receiving.

I get that, and would never actually let them pay at these beginning dating stages, but at least make an attempt to offer.

My last relationship was with a 41 yr old (I'm 37)....the difference in this area is night and day with all of these 26-31 yr olds I've recently been seeing.

Would be a quality neg though. Make a hot chick pay on the first date

Problem is you'd never get playtime that night or a second date. Coming off as cheap on the initial first impressions date is probably worse than being unattractive or no sense of humor whatsoever.

You sure? women love cheap guys

 

[offdee]

You sure? women love cheap guys

You mind picking up this tab, babe? I just dropped $300 on this tshirt today, runnin' a little low tonight.

 

[Joe T]

You sure? women love cheap guys

You mind picking up this tab, babe? I just dropped $300 on this tshirt today, runnin' a little low tonight.

lol

 

[Joe T]

For the record, OKC is 10x better than EH.

That fact is probably buried in the thread somewhere, but I never found it. Posting this for FYI purposes only.

 

[Major]

You sure? women love cheap guys

You mind picking up this tab, babe? I just dropped $300 on this tshirt today, runnin' a little low tonight.

That's good schtick for the second date.

1st date: Leave wallet at home (she'll be intrigued)

2nd date: Offer to pay tip b/c you spent $300 on jeans (currently on ice in the freezer) and need cash for the monthly note on your Toyota Tercel. By this point, she'll be wrapped around your finger. Resist her advances and call it an early night b/c you're busy.

3rd date: She's ready, willing and able. Treat her to Olive Garden and pay with gift card. You're in

 

[offdee]

you spent $300 on jeans (currently on ice in the freezer)

 

[Joe T]

Take it easy for now. Put some work into coming up with a "formula" for your messages that works. That, and it's really a numbers game. 1 in 25 isn't that bad to start with. Once you start perfecting your pitch, you'll get that ratio up, but honestly I think on some sites 1 reply in 10 is the best anyone can do.

1st message: Quick, funny, lighthearted, 5-6 sentences. Pick one specific thing in her profile and ask to hear more about it.

She replies, wait until the next day, 2nd message: Another short, lighthearted note. If she asks a question, answer it and ask one back. Otherwise, ask a follow up question or pick something else in her profile to ask about. In my experience, online women are horrible at giving you a lead to write back on... they're terrible at asking questions back so you kind of have to shoehorn one in sometimes.

She replies again. She's interested. Wait until the next day and ask her out, finish up whatever the ongoing conversation is in a sentence or two, then say something like: "Anyway, as much fun as this website is, I find I can really get to know a person better in one hour over drinks than a bunch of back-and-forth emails. So let's meet Monday (or whatever M/Tu/W/Th weeknight is about three days away) night after work at (insert some low-key dive bar with darts or a pool table closer to your place than her part of town), about 8. Shoot me a text at 123-456-7890 and we'll figure out details." (if you're in L.A., change up that wording a little bit, I may have over-used it some )

That's it. The keys are 1) have a good profile that hits the right notes, and 2) read her whole profile so you can tailor that first message. You'll be sending out a ton of them at first, but once you hone it down you'll be seeing better results. I started out with a ratio similar to yours, but eventually worked out a formula that improved on that. After a month and a half or so, I would send 5 new messages a day and was meeting with 2-3 new girls a week. And I'm a .

Black dot

 

[Joe T]

If you can write well, craigslist is way easier.

lolz

 

[Joe T]

one girl i just stumbled upon wrote in her interests that she like haikus, so i wrote one as my opening message to her. should be interesting to see if that works or not

My name is GusterJoin me for a shot or two?Hope you are easy

Lmao

Gold!

 

[Joe T]

O/U 25 pages

O

 

[Joe T]

I'm bad at google docs apparently. I was trying to avoid posting this long thing here, but this ad worked really well for me once upon a time.

Hello, world of Craigslist. I'm (as the title would indicate) looking for an awesome girl. I'm not looking for a perfect girl, because she doesn't exist - and if she did she'd likely be looking for perfection in a mate which would lead to my eventually disappointing her with my own undeniable imperfection. I'm instead looking for the perfect girl for me (I know, you're shocked), and since we can post about anything we want here on Craigslist, I might as well shoot for awesomeness. I'll warn you now that, of my strengths, I do not count brevity as one of them. So this will be a bit long.

You, awesome girl, are likely reading this ad because you've exhausted all the options in your group of friends, people you know through work, and friends of family. (Though really, does anybody a family member tries to hook you up with ever work out?) You want someone to date and get to know - someone you can call at the end of a long day and vent, someone you can talk to when you're proud of something, and someone to enjoy a nice dinner and a bottle of wine with after a long week. You are, however, unwilling to date simply to have a fellow on your arm - you're happy with your life, you don't need a man to fix anything, and if you don't find the right man, you're perfectly content being single.



In my perfect dream world, awesome girl, you've got the following traits.



Intelligence - You're likely well educated, but more importantly, you simply "get it" most of the time. You're able to competently discuss a variety of subjects, and if you're ignorant in a certain area, you've got no problem admitting it - and you likely start asking a lot of questions, because you like to know and understand things. You love to learn, and you realize learning is something you do every day, not confined only to a classroom setting or reading a book.



Comfortable with yourself - You don't talk a lot about how amazing you are, because you don't need to. Sure, you have your insecurities (we all do) but for the most part you're pretty aware of your strengths and weaknesses, and if something about yourself that you can control really bugged you, you've probably taken steps to correct it. You're happy with who you are.



You're socially aware - You can likely read people pretty well, and you can generally get a good idea of what type of person you're talking to within the first few minutes of a conversation. You're perfectly comfortable if you find yourself alone in a group of people you don't know. You can and do get along with a wide variety of people, and actually enjoy said wide variety of people. This ties in with the next item on my ever-growing list.



You're versatile - You're comfortable in a variety of different settings. You can get all fancied up to go out for a night on the town in Belltown, but you're fine with throwing on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt and going to a dive bar with little or no makeup on. You're not intimidated by dressing up in a business suit and can more than hold your own in a professional discussion, but you're also perfectly happy going to the state fairgrounds and watching the demolition derby. (Note: I don't care if you enjoy the demolition derby or not, it was simply an example on the opposite end of the spectrum from a suit.)



You take care of your body/are attractive - You also aren't offended that I'd include this on a list, because hey, physical attraction is important and you realize that. I don't need you to be a supermodel or a triathlete (I won't be either any time soon) but you are active because you enjoy feeling and looking your best. Well, and because being active is fun. You're aware of what you eat - not to say you don't love a good burger, ice cream, or whatever your culinary weakness is (one of mine is the good burger) but you maybe don't eat junk food all day every day.



You're likely somewhere in the general vicinity of my age (you can tell just how important this is to me by how specific I'm being), and you likely have a job that you're pretty good at - you're probably pretty good at most things you set your mind to, actually. You may even have been described by some as "intimidating" due to your general precociousness, attractiveness, and confidence level. This is good. I'd go so far to say that if you've been called intimidating, you're likely pretty awesome.



A little about me:



As you likely guessed, I like to think I have most of the traits I listed. I mean hey, if I sat in my mom's basement playing video games all day, I wouldn't much care how socially aware you are, right? I'm certainly not the perfect man, but I like to think I'm a pretty decent catch on my good days - here's a bit about me.



I'm 29, 5'10'', and while I won't be on the cover of Men's Health anytime soon, most seem to find me attractive. I haven't posted a picture here as I don't really feel like broadcasting it for the world to see, but I'm happy to send a picture and a video of myself when you respond.

I've got a good job that I actually enjoy doing, and I own my home on the Eastside. I'm certainly not wealthy, however.

I've got a pretty eclectic range of interests and know a lot of random things. I'm usually pretty useful on pub trivia night.

I'll play just about any sport with a ball and enjoy it, and I'm a fan of most of the local sports teams.

I'm a bit of a beverage nerd - if you like good beer and have made it this far, you definitely should respond, as I've got some great, obscure beer in my cellar that I love to share with people.

I'm quite social - I tend to spend my free time and my mad money being around my group of friends, who I'm lucky to have, as they're a pretty great group of people. I'm pretty well traveled, and usually don't lack for a story to tell when it's appropriate. You likely won't be embarrassed for me to meet your friends should we get that far.

I've got a pretty overdeveloped sense of humor that is wildly inappropriate when the setting is right.

I've done a lot of random things. I'll tell you about them another time as we get to know each other.



My goal in writing this is definitely not to have a big checklist, all items of which are necessary for me to respond. I'm trying to give you, awesome girl, an idea of what I find attractive, and if you feel I'd find you attractive and you don't mind what I've written here, perhaps you'll respond, we can exchange a few pleasantries over email, and then meet up for a happy hour drink, a walk around greenlake, kayaking in the arboretum, or really anything so we can see if we click.

Black dot!

 

[Joe T]

I have a slow day. Please post a lot in here today. TIA[/quote

 

[OC Zed]

For the record, OKC is 10x better than EH.

That fact is probably buried in the thread somewhere, but I never found it. Posting this for FYI purposes only.

I completely disagree, but I guess it depends on what you are looking for. For me, I've been looking to meet women with their #### together in life... life goals, career, previous baggage, etc. EH has been the best option by far for that. And there are plenty of physically attractive chicks on there as well. OKC and Match were just meat markets for casual daters. But that's great (no sarcasm) if that's what you want...

 

[Major]

I met her on Christian Mingle...

 

[Joe T]

For the record, OKC is 10x better than EH.

That fact is probably buried in the thread somewhere, but I never found it. Posting this for FYI purposes only.

I completely disagree, but I guess it depends on what you are looking for. For me, I've been looking to meet women with their #### together in life... life goals, career, previous baggage, etc. EH has been the best option by far for that. And there are plenty of physically attractive chicks on there as well. OKC and Match were just meat markets for casual daters. But that's great (no sarcasm) if that's what you want...

The problem with EH is you can't search. You get whatever they send you and IMO that sucks much worse than OKC.

 

[Joe T]

Whatever happened to Bucky?

 

[Zegras11]

Whatever happened to Bucky?

He offed himself when the Kings lost to the Hawks

 

[Joe T]

5 user(s) are reading this topic3 members, 1 guests, 1 anonymous users

• Joe T*, Buckfast 1, Bucky86, pricklypete

Bucky86> Hi

Big fan.

 

[OC Zed]

For the record, OKC is 10x better than EH.

That fact is probably buried in the thread somewhere, but I never found it. Posting this for FYI purposes only.

I completely disagree, but I guess it depends on what you are looking for. For me, I've been looking to meet women with their #### together in life... life goals, career, previous baggage, etc. EH has been the best option by far for that. And there are plenty of physically attractive chicks on there as well. OKC and Match were just meat markets for casual daters. But that's great (no sarcasm) if that's what you want...

The problem with EH is you can't search. You get whatever they send you and IMO that sucks much worse than OKC.

This is actually a good thing for guys. Attractive chicks on the other sites that allow for searching get bombarded with 30+ messages a day. EH keeps your dating pool confined to your daily matches. Although I think I'm a good catch, I'd much rather be competing for a chick's attention against 15 other guys rather than 200+.

All of this assumes there are attractive chicks on EH - which I think is absolutely the case in my area (especially if you want to shy away from the trashy/party element).

 

[Joe T]

Seeing someone from Match

WB GB.

Details?

 

[offdee]

So, when does the plate spinning become too much? I'm presently seeing 4 ladies (2 from real world and 2 from OKC). Luckily one of the OKC's lives in Chicago so seeing her is a planned event so that helps. Eventually it will probably catch up with me....already have run into the conversations where they say "we talked about that last time" type stuff.

One of the ladies during playtime did the old "I hope you don't think I'm just a random hookup" comment. And then later "you're not having secks with anybody else are you?" Ummmmm..... Time to start downshifting on that one. (surprise, it's the 27 yr old)

 

[John Bender]

So, when does the plate spinning become too much? I'm presently seeing 4 ladies (2 from real world and 2 from OKC). Luckily one of the OKC's lives in Chicago so seeing her is a planned event so that helps. Eventually it will probably catch up with me....already have run into the conversations where they say "we talked about that last time" type stuff.

One of the ladies during playtime did the old "I hope you don't think I'm just a random hookup" comment. And then later "you're not having secks with anybody else are you?" Ummmmm..... Time to start downshifting on that one. (surprise, it's the 27 yr old)

You aren't exclusive with her?

run for the ####### hills

 

[Major]

So, when does the plate spinning become too much? I'm presently seeing 4 ladies (2 from real world and 2 from OKC). Luckily one of the OKC's lives in Chicago so seeing her is a planned event so that helps. Eventually it will probably catch up with me....already have run into the conversations where they say "we talked about that last time" type stuff.

One of the ladies during playtime did the old "I hope you don't think I'm just a random hookup" comment. And then later "you're not having secks with anybody else are you?" Ummmmm..... Time to start downshifting on that one. (surprise, it's the 27 yr old)

I'd say 6 is the tipping point. Anything after that becomes unmanageable and more work/money/time than it's worth. 3-4 is a solid rotation until they start asking where is this going. Of course, I'm talking women in roughly the same vicinity of where you live/go out. The number goes way up if you got hoes in different country codes.

 

[Major]

So, when does the plate spinning become too much? I'm presently seeing 4 ladies (2 from real world and 2 from OKC). Luckily one of the OKC's lives in Chicago so seeing her is a planned event so that helps. Eventually it will probably catch up with me....already have run into the conversations where they say "we talked about that last time" type stuff.

One of the ladies during playtime did the old "I hope you don't think I'm just a random hookup" comment. And then later "you're not having secks with anybody else are you?" Ummmmm..... Time to start downshifting on that one. (surprise, it's the 27 yr old)

You aren't exclusive with her?

run for the ####### hills

x2

This girl needs to ride the bench for a while or cut out entirely. She's either looking for "the one" or used to be a big slut and trying to change.

 

[offdee]

So, when does the plate spinning become too much? I'm presently seeing 4 ladies (2 from real world and 2 from OKC). Luckily one of the OKC's lives in Chicago so seeing her is a planned event so that helps. Eventually it will probably catch up with me....already have run into the conversations where they say "we talked about that last time" type stuff.

One of the ladies during playtime did the old "I hope you don't think I'm just a random hookup" comment. And then later "you're not having secks with anybody else are you?" Ummmmm..... Time to start downshifting on that one. (surprise, it's the 27 yr old)

You aren't exclusive with her?

run for the ####### hills

x2

This girl needs to ride the bench for a while or cut out entirely. She's either looking for "the one" or used to be a big slut and trying to change.

In her slight defense, the context of her question should be clarified. How do I say this without getting a timeout?....

I asked if I should put on my rain galoshes before jumping in the puddle. She was more interested in playing in the rain barefoot, so the question at hand was asked.

 

[Slider6]

For the record, OKC is 10x better than EH.

That fact is probably buried in the thread somewhere, but I never found it. Posting this for FYI purposes only.

I completely disagree, but I guess it depends on what you are looking for. For me, I've been looking to meet women with their #### together in life... life goals, career, previous baggage, etc. EH has been the best option by far for that. And there are plenty of physically attractive chicks on there as well. OKC and Match were just meat markets for casual daters. But that's great (no sarcasm) if that's what you want...

The problem with EH is you can't search. You get whatever they send you and IMO that sucks much worse than OKC.

This is actually a good thing for guys. Attractive chicks on the other sites that allow for searching get bombarded with 30+ messages a day. EH keeps your dating pool confined to your daily matches. Although I think I'm a good catch, I'd much rather be competing for a chick's attention against 15 other guys rather than 200+.

All of this assumes there are attractive chicks on EH - which I think is absolutely the case in my area (especially if you want to shy away from the trashy/party element).

But there is the problem. I don't think you can see when the last time your matches at EH logged in. They never get rid of profiles either.

I went on a date with a chick from OKC who swore she saw me on EH recently and had contacted me there. I had a profile for like 3 months at least 2 years before I went out with this chick. When she said that, it reminded me that I used to have a whole bunch of open first communication steps or whatever and immediately made a lot of sense. There seemed to be a lot of beasts on there too.

 

[John Bender]

For the record, OKC is 10x better than EH.

That fact is probably buried in the thread somewhere, but I never found it. Posting this for FYI purposes only.

I completely disagree, but I guess it depends on what you are looking for. For me, I've been looking to meet women with their #### together in life... life goals, career, previous baggage, etc. EH has been the best option by far for that. And there are plenty of physically attractive chicks on there as well. OKC and Match were just meat markets for casual daters. But that's great (no sarcasm) if that's what you want...

The problem with EH is you can't search. You get whatever they send you and IMO that sucks much worse than OKC.

This is actually a good thing for guys. Attractive chicks on the other sites that allow for searching get bombarded with 30+ messages a day. EH keeps your dating pool confined to your daily matches. Although I think I'm a good catch, I'd much rather be competing for a chick's attention against 15 other guys rather than 200+.

All of this assumes there are attractive chicks on EH - which I think is absolutely the case in my area (especially if you want to shy away from the trashy/party element).

But there is the problem. I don't think you can see when the last time your matches at EH logged in. They never get rid of profiles either.

I went on a date with a chick from OKC who swore she saw me on EH recently and had contacted me there. I had a profile for like 3 months at least 2 years before I went out with this chick. When she said that, it reminded me that I used to have a whole bunch of open first communication steps or whatever and immediately made a lot of sense. There seemed to be a lot of beasts on there too.

The mobile app on eharmony allows you to see the last time the person was active.

It's the only way I've been able to find that info out.

 

[OC Zed]

For the record, OKC is 10x better than EH.

That fact is probably buried in the thread somewhere, but I never found it. Posting this for FYI purposes only.

I completely disagree, but I guess it depends on what you are looking for. For me, I've been looking to meet women with their #### together in life... life goals, career, previous baggage, etc. EH has been the best option by far for that. And there are plenty of physically attractive chicks on there as well. OKC and Match were just meat markets for casual daters. But that's great (no sarcasm) if that's what you want...

The problem with EH is you can't search. You get whatever they send you and IMO that sucks much worse than OKC.

This is actually a good thing for guys. Attractive chicks on the other sites that allow for searching get bombarded with 30+ messages a day. EH keeps your dating pool confined to your daily matches. Although I think I'm a good catch, I'd much rather be competing for a chick's attention against 15 other guys rather than 200+.

All of this assumes there are attractive chicks on EH - which I think is absolutely the case in my area (especially if you want to shy away from the trashy/party element).

But there is the problem. I don't think you can see when the last time your matches at EH logged in. They never get rid of profiles either.

I went on a date with a chick from OKC who swore she saw me on EH recently and had contacted me there. I had a profile for like 3 months at least 2 years before I went out with this chick. When she said that, it reminded me that I used to have a whole bunch of open first communication steps or whatever and immediately made a lot of sense. There seemed to be a lot of beasts on there too.

Ya, you can tell when a chick (or guy) has logged in when you open her profile (this might not be true on their cell phone app, but I can't recall for sure). It will say something to the effect of "Active in the last 2 weeks" or whatever time period.

And they are pretty good when sending new matches to make sure to send people that are relatively active. The only time I can recall seeing non-active chicks on there is when I was perusing the "What If" function.

 

[OC Zed]

For the record, OKC is 10x better than EH.

That fact is probably buried in the thread somewhere, but I never found it. Posting this for FYI purposes only.

I completely disagree, but I guess it depends on what you are looking for. For me, I've been looking to meet women with their #### together in life... life goals, career, previous baggage, etc. EH has been the best option by far for that. And there are plenty of physically attractive chicks on there as well. OKC and Match were just meat markets for casual daters. But that's great (no sarcasm) if that's what you want...

The problem with EH is you can't search. You get whatever they send you and IMO that sucks much worse than OKC.

This is actually a good thing for guys. Attractive chicks on the other sites that allow for searching get bombarded with 30+ messages a day. EH keeps your dating pool confined to your daily matches. Although I think I'm a good catch, I'd much rather be competing for a chick's attention against 15 other guys rather than 200+.

All of this assumes there are attractive chicks on EH - which I think is absolutely the case in my area (especially if you want to shy away from the trashy/party element).

But there is the problem. I don't think you can see when the last time your matches at EH logged in. They never get rid of profiles either.

I went on a date with a chick from OKC who swore she saw me on EH recently and had contacted me there. I had a profile for like 3 months at least 2 years before I went out with this chick. When she said that, it reminded me that I used to have a whole bunch of open first communication steps or whatever and immediately made a lot of sense. There seemed to be a lot of beasts on there too.

The mobile app on eharmony allows you to see the last time the person was active.

It's the only way I've been able to find that info out.

On the PC/Mac, look directly below their name on their main profile page.

 

[Slider6]

For the record, OKC is 10x better than EH.

That fact is probably buried in the thread somewhere, but I never found it. Posting this for FYI purposes only.

I completely disagree, but I guess it depends on what you are looking for. For me, I've been looking to meet women with their #### together in life... life goals, career, previous baggage, etc. EH has been the best option by far for that. And there are plenty of physically attractive chicks on there as well. OKC and Match were just meat markets for casual daters. But that's great (no sarcasm) if that's what you want...

The problem with EH is you can't search. You get whatever they send you and IMO that sucks much worse than OKC.

This is actually a good thing for guys. Attractive chicks on the other sites that allow for searching get bombarded with 30+ messages a day. EH keeps your dating pool confined to your daily matches. Although I think I'm a good catch, I'd much rather be competing for a chick's attention against 15 other guys rather than 200+.

All of this assumes there are attractive chicks on EH - which I think is absolutely the case in my area (especially if you want to shy away from the trashy/party element).

But there is the problem. I don't think you can see when the last time your matches at EH logged in. They never get rid of profiles either.

I went on a date with a chick from OKC who swore she saw me on EH recently and had contacted me there. I had a profile for like 3 months at least 2 years before I went out with this chick. When she said that, it reminded me that I used to have a whole bunch of open first communication steps or whatever and immediately made a lot of sense. There seemed to be a lot of beasts on there too.

Ya, you can tell when a chick (or guy) has logged in when you open her profile (this might not be true on their cell phone app, but I can't recall for sure). It will say something to the effect of "Active in the last 2 weeks" or whatever time period.

And they are pretty good when sending new matches to make sure to send people that are relatively active. The only time I can recall seeing non-active chicks on there is when I was perusing the "What If" function.

When I had a profile up there there weren't cell phone apps. Maybe I'll give it another go sometime soon.

 

[Joe T]

Update: probably not a great idea to be on two sites at once. It's a lot to keep up with.

By the way, there is some gold in this thread. Absolute GOLD.

We need stu to get back in here.

 

[Bogart]

Scanning the "Locals" part of the OKC app while in LA is much more fun than doing it in Dallas/Fort Worth.

 

[offdee]

Scanning the "Locals" part of the OKC app while in LA is much more fun than doing it in Dallas/Fort Worth.

It's like that with me and Milwaukee. Putting search parameters to 100 miles out which brings in Chicago is like a completely different world. Chicago is just a quick 1.5 hr train ride away....

 

[Major]

So, when does the plate spinning become too much? I'm presently seeing 4 ladies (2 from real world and 2 from OKC). Luckily one of the OKC's lives in Chicago so seeing her is a planned event so that helps. Eventually it will probably catch up with me....already have run into the conversations where they say "we talked about that last time" type stuff.

One of the ladies during playtime did the old "I hope you don't think I'm just a random hookup" comment. And then later "you're not having secks with anybody else are you?" Ummmmm..... Time to start downshifting on that one. (surprise, it's the 27 yr old)

You aren't exclusive with her?

run for the ####### hills

x2

This girl needs to ride the bench for a while or cut out entirely. She's either looking for "the one" or used to be a big slut and trying to change.

In her slight defense, the context of her question should be clarified. How do I say this without getting a timeout?....

I asked if I should put on my rain galoshes before jumping in the puddle. She was more interested in playing in the rain barefoot, so the question at hand was asked.

:slut:

 

[Major]

Scanning the "Locals" part of the OKC app while in LA is much more fun than doing it in Dallas/Fort Worth.

It's like that with me and Milwaukee. Putting search parameters to 100 miles out which brings in Chicago is like a completely different world. Chicago is just a quick 1.5 hr train ride away....

I haven't checked out the Houston or Austin OKC but I'm sure it'll be similar disappointment when comparing to NYC.