Yeah, I like those suggestions. Just couldn't tell with this one and she was really nice so I didn't want to come off as too forward. We know a lot about each other's colleges so we did joke about the little sexually based nuances at the bars and such and the rules for staying in dorms, but that was pretty much it. I should note that I was slightly off my game and not completely into the charm, so if we go out again I'll give some of these approaches a try. Like I said she's super quiet and I am too so I usually like to see some positive responses for me to keep chugging along.
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***Official*** FFA iDating Thread (5 Viewers)
- Thread starter Woz
- Start date
krista4
Footballguy
JAA, I think you usually give great advice, but I can't agree with this bit. If a guy went along most of the lines you've suggested, most women would think..."Damn, that guys a good dresser ... do you think he is hot? Would you date a guy like that?" - Is this guy gay? "That girl is ok, I think if she worked out more like you do she would be better off" - We've gone over this one before, but criticizing other women is a no-no. Makes a girl wonder what you're saying behind her back and just generally makes you look like a cad."So do you ever kiss on the first date? Im going to be pretty angry if I dont get a first date kiss. For me, its just about a given ... just wanted to let you know." - Said in the right way, you could pull this one off."Do you date a lot? What kind of guys do you go for? Im not sure I fit that mold, why exactly are you out with me?" - Sounds way insecure."Are you more of a short fling with guys or push into longer relationships? Whats the longest relationship you have been in? Wow, he put up with you that long ... just kidding". - Might be OK if you say it right.I realize that you didn't mean these exact phrases have to be used, but here's the problem, and I do NOT mean this as bashing Woz - Woz probably couldn't pull these off. He's stated that he's shy, and we know that he is definitely not good at improvising. I'd just be worried that he'd decide to try and it would be a disaster. Otis could probably get away with the two that I've mentioned you'd have to say right, because he'd say them in a lighthearted manner. Woz is generally more serious and sensitive, which I do not think is a bad thing, but just means this approach probably wouldn't work for him.
Woz, I think you'll just need to be a little more patient. Sounds like you had a pretty good time with this girl, and hopefully you'll just both be more relaxed on the next date. She could also be picking up your vibe - we know you were nervous about this, too, and not sure you wanted to date at all - and reacting accordingly. Relax and have fun! 
Last edited by a moderator:
code
Footballguy
Otis
Footballguy
So, about that dream...Well hello!Dayam! I did see one of those pictures but didn't believe the guys when they said it was you. Great dimples!
Mrs. BSR
Footballguy
Yes?So, about that dream...Well hello!Dayam! I did see one of those pictures but didn't believe the guys when they said it was you. Great dimples!
dancingbones
Footballguy
For the record, the Mrs. & I did not attend any neighborhood parties this weekend.My update...
Nothing interesting in Minnesota the past 5 days. Pretty sure some random chick at a neighborhood party wanted it, but her husband was right there. Crazy #####.I passed on the hottub to avoid being drawn into her little soap opera.
I was supposed to meet "myspace redhead" last night, but my flight was canceled. So we'll have to try again another time.
Date tonight with "school girl". Will report back.
Pip's Invitation
Footballguy
We never suspected it was you. You woulda encouraged the guy to go for it.For the record, the Mrs. & I did not attend any neighborhood parties this weekend.My update...
Nothing interesting in Minnesota the past 5 days. Pretty sure some random chick at a neighborhood party wanted it, but her husband was right there. Crazy #####.I passed on the hottub to avoid being drawn into her little soap opera.
I was supposed to meet "myspace redhead" last night, but my flight was canceled. So we'll have to try again another time.
Date tonight with "school girl". Will report back.
Disco Stu
Confirmed FBGal
For the record, the Mrs. & I did not attend any neighborhood parties this weekend.My update...
Nothing interesting in Minnesota the past 5 days. Pretty sure some random chick at a neighborhood party wanted it, but her husband was right there. Crazy #####.I passed on the hottub to avoid being drawn into her little soap opera.
I was supposed to meet "myspace redhead" last night, but my flight was canceled. So we'll have to try again another time.
Date tonight with "school girl". Will report back.
Yeah, this guy seemed pretty clueless. Poor *******. Three kids too...
Disco Stu
Confirmed FBGal
Advice needed on post-date messaging. Today's message exchanges with last night's date...
My instinct here is to assure her that it's ok, I'm patient. But I've been patient to a fault in the past, so I'm not sure that's the best approach. Thoughts?Also, keep in mind that it's been a year since this girl has dated. And I'm getting the impression she assumes I'm not seeing anyone else.
JAA
Footballguy
Good discussion here. I think you made a lot of valid points. I would say though you made those reactions from your perspective and not from the perspective of a shy reserved (so perceived) girl. The goal of the comments is to elicit a reaction ... any reaction ... not necessarily a positive reaction. Simply opening is the goal here (IMHO) with respect to gaining control of the situation. Whether or not Woz could pull them off may be on point, but he was looking for advice. Its never to late to adjust ones game.Thanks again for the constructive criticism. Good luck WozWoz, I think you'll just need to be a little more patient. Sounds like you had a pretty good time with this girl, and hopefully you'll just both be more relaxed on the next date. She could also be picking up your vibe - we know you were nervous about this, too, and not sure you wanted to date at all - and reacting accordingly. Relax and have fun!
Homer J Simpson
I don't push
Go for the jugular.Advice needed on post-date messaging. Today's message exchanges with last night's date...
My instinct here is to assure her that it's ok, I'm patient. But I've been patient to a fault in the past, so I'm not sure that's the best approach. Thoughts?Also, keep in mind that it's been a year since this girl has dated. And I'm getting the impression she assumes I'm not seeing anyone else.
Slinger
Footballguy
I read all these advice from magazines that suggest you should be honest with women that you're dating others. That's just stupid. The best way to keep her off the relationship thing is to only see her once, maybe twice a week. If you start spending a lot of time with her you're her boyfriend, regardless if you want to be or not.I wouldn't respond to her 'Am I going too slow as a rebound' question, but instead just say something bland like "it's all good" and then ask what she's doing tonight or whenever.She wants sex. Play the cards right and you're in.Advice needed on post-date messaging. Today's message exchanges with last night's date...
My instinct here is to assure her that it's ok, I'm patient. But I've been patient to a fault in the past, so I'm not sure that's the best approach. Thoughts?Also, keep in mind that it's been a year since this girl has dated. And I'm getting the impression she assumes I'm not seeing anyone else.
JAA
Footballguy
sounds like this girl likes the chase. I would recommend continuing to give it to her. Make her work for it.Stu: Me too... good times. And I'm glad I wasn't dumb enough to turn down the short drive to my car. Her: lol me too! so tell me... am I ruining your rebound by taking it too slow?Stu: I thought we were moving fast. What am I missing out on? Details work for meAdvice needed on post-date messaging. Today's message exchanges with last night's date...
My instinct here is to assure her that it's ok, I'm patient. But I've been patient to a fault in the past, so I'm not sure that's the best approach. Thoughts?Also, keep in mind that it's been a year since this girl has dated. And I'm getting the impression she assumes I'm not seeing anyone else.
Disco Stu
Confirmed FBGal
But where do I locate her iJugular?Go for the jugular.Advice needed on post-date messaging. Today's message exchanges with last night's date...
My instinct here is to assure her that it's ok, I'm patient. But I've been patient to a fault in the past, so I'm not sure that's the best approach. Thoughts?Also, keep in mind that it's been a year since this girl has dated. And I'm getting the impression she assumes I'm not seeing anyone else.
Disco Stu
Confirmed FBGal
Agreed on the once or twice a week thing.Also, she all but said last night that we'd be making the secks July 5th... and not before. Not sure about her "everything but" stance...I read all these advice from magazines that suggest you should be honest with women that you're dating others. That's just stupid. The best way to keep her off the relationship thing is to only see her once, maybe twice a week. If you start spending a lot of time with her you're her boyfriend, regardless if you want to be or not.I wouldn't respond to her 'Am I going too slow as a rebound' question, but instead just say something bland like "it's all good" and then ask what she's doing tonight or whenever.She wants sex. Play the cards right and you're in.Advice needed on post-date messaging. Today's message exchanges with last night's date...
My instinct here is to assure her that it's ok, I'm patient. But I've been patient to a fault in the past, so I'm not sure that's the best approach. Thoughts?Also, keep in mind that it's been a year since this girl has dated. And I'm getting the impression she assumes I'm not seeing anyone else.
krista4
Footballguy
I'd go with your instinct. She sounds like a cool girl and surprisingly sane, and you seem to like her, so this is a good time to be patient and let her know that everything's going fine.Advice needed on post-date messaging. Today's message exchanges with last night's date...
My instinct here is to assure her that it's ok, I'm patient. But I've been patient to a fault in the past, so I'm not sure that's the best approach. Thoughts?Also, keep in mind that it's been a year since this girl has dated. And I'm getting the impression she assumes I'm not seeing anyone else.
Homer J Simpson
I don't push
It's on her iNeck, dumb###. Jeez, anatomy down?But where do I locate her iJugular?Go for the jugular.Advice needed on post-date messaging. Today's message exchanges with last night's date...
My instinct here is to assure her that it's ok, I'm patient. But I've been patient to a fault in the past, so I'm not sure that's the best approach. Thoughts?Also, keep in mind that it's been a year since this girl has dated. And I'm getting the impression she assumes I'm not seeing anyone else.
krista4
Footballguy
You make a very good point, too. As long as you're going for any reaction, I do agree with you, and I might have misread Wozzy's intention.Good discussion here. I think you made a lot of valid points. I would say though you made those reactions from your perspective and not from the perspective of a shy reserved (so perceived) girl. The goal of the comments is to elicit a reaction ... any reaction ... not necessarily a positive reaction. Simply opening is the goal here (IMHO) with respect to gaining control of the situation. Whether or not Woz could pull them off may be on point, but he was looking for advice. Its never to late to adjust ones game.Thanks again for the constructive criticism. Good luck Woz
"That girl is ok, I think if she worked out more like you do she would be better off" - We've gone over this one before, but criticizing other women is a no-no. Makes a girl wonder what you're saying behind her back and just generally makes you look like a cad.
"So do you ever kiss on the first date? Im going to be pretty angry if I dont get a first date kiss. For me, its just about a given ... just wanted to let you know." - Said in the right way, you could pull this one off.
"Do you date a lot? What kind of guys do you go for? Im not sure I fit that mold, why exactly are you out with me?" - Sounds way insecure.
"Are you more of a short fling with guys or push into longer relationships? Whats the longest relationship you have been in? Wow, he put up with you that long ... just kidding". - Might be OK if you say it right.
I realize that you didn't mean these exact phrases have to be used, but here's the problem, and I do NOT mean this as bashing Woz - Woz probably couldn't pull these off. He's stated that he's shy, and we know that he is definitely not good at improvising. I'd just be worried that he'd decide to try and it would be a disaster. Otis could probably get away with the two that I've mentioned you'd have to say right, because he'd say them in a lighthearted manner. Woz is generally more serious and sensitive, which I do not think is a bad thing, but just means this approach probably wouldn't work for him.
Woz, I think you'll just need to be a little more patient. Sounds like you had a pretty good time with this girl, and hopefully you'll just both be more relaxed on the next date. She could also be picking up your vibe - we know you were nervous about this, too, and not sure you wanted to date at all - and reacting accordingly. Relax and have fun!
krista4
Footballguy
I take it back! I like this reply instead!sounds like this girl likes the chase. I would recommend continuing to give it to her. Make her work for it.Stu: Me too... good times. And I'm glad I wasn't dumb enough to turn down the short drive to my car. Her: lol me too! so tell me... am I ruining your rebound by taking it too slow?Stu: I thought we were moving fast. What am I missing out on? Details work for meAdvice needed on post-date messaging. Today's message exchanges with last night's date...
My instinct here is to assure her that it's ok, I'm patient. But I've been patient to a fault in the past, so I'm not sure that's the best approach. Thoughts?Also, keep in mind that it's been a year since this girl has dated. And I'm getting the impression she assumes I'm not seeing anyone else.
JAA
Footballguy
you mean without it being locked?OU on that was prolly 12 or so
Pip's Invitation
Footballguy
The dancingbones Hedonism trip thread never got locked. So why would this? The title is innocuous enough that the Faceless Mods aren't gonna bother delving into it.
I'm sure the ispies are loving it. I know mine is. :woz:
Keys Myaths
Pokerguy
Disco Stu
Confirmed FBGal
I'm a little concerned that the bolded may backfire and slow things down. I don't want her to think she's being too aggressive.Maybe I'll change it to completely playing dumb...krista4 said:I take it back! I like this reply instead!JAA said:sounds like this girl likes the chase. I would recommend continuing to give it to her. Make her work for it.Stu: Me too... good times. And I'm glad I wasn't dumb enough to turn down the short drive to my car.Disco Stu said:Advice needed on post-date messaging. Today's message exchanges with last night's date...
My instinct here is to assure her that it's ok, I'm patient. But I've been patient to a fault in the past, so I'm not sure that's the best approach. Thoughts?Also, keep in mind that it's been a year since this girl has dated. And I'm getting the impression she assumes I'm not seeing anyone else.
Her: lol me too! so tell me... am I ruining your rebound by taking it too slow?
Stu: I thought we were moving fast. What am I missing out on? Details work for me
Stu: I thought we were moving fast. Taking what slow? What am I missing out on? Details work for me
krista4
Footballguy
The humor and irony are lost with the change. Maybe just go back to your initial approach?I'm a little concerned that the bolded may backfire and slow things down. I don't want her to think she's being too aggressive.Maybe I'll change it to completely playing dumb...krista4 said:I take it back! I like this reply instead!JAA said:sounds like this girl likes the chase. I would recommend continuing to give it to her. Make her work for it.Stu: Me too... good times. And I'm glad I wasn't dumb enough to turn down the short drive to my car.Disco Stu said:Advice needed on post-date messaging. Today's message exchanges with last night's date...
My instinct here is to assure her that it's ok, I'm patient. But I've been patient to a fault in the past, so I'm not sure that's the best approach. Thoughts?Also, keep in mind that it's been a year since this girl has dated. And I'm getting the impression she assumes I'm not seeing anyone else.
Her: lol me too! so tell me... am I ruining your rebound by taking it too slow?
Stu: I thought we were moving fast. What am I missing out on? Details work for me
Stu: I thought we were moving fast. Taking what slow? What am I missing out on? Details work for me
Disco Stu
Confirmed FBGal
The humor and irony are lost with the change. Maybe just go back to your initial approach?I'm a little concerned that the bolded may backfire and slow things down. I don't want her to think she's being too aggressive.Maybe I'll change it to completely playing dumb...krista4 said:I take it back! I like this reply instead!JAA said:sounds like this girl likes the chase. I would recommend continuing to give it to her. Make her work for it.Stu: Me too... good times. And I'm glad I wasn't dumb enough to turn down the short drive to my car.Disco Stu said:Advice needed on post-date messaging. Today's message exchanges with last night's date...
My instinct here is to assure her that it's ok, I'm patient. But I've been patient to a fault in the past, so I'm not sure that's the best approach. Thoughts?Also, keep in mind that it's been a year since this girl has dated. And I'm getting the impression she assumes I'm not seeing anyone else.
Her: lol me too! so tell me... am I ruining your rebound by taking it too slow?
Stu: I thought we were moving fast. What am I missing out on? Details work for me
Stu: I thought we were moving fast. Taking what slow? What am I missing out on? Details work for me
We haven't been playing any games, so I may just stick with the "shtick-free" shtick...
Keys Myaths
Pokerguy
No kidding.I thought this was going to be shtick, then everyone started actually doing it.Otis said:
code
Footballguy
[hijack]Measuring threads in terms of pages is completely fla\/\/ed...people can change the number of posts per page for their account...in fact for me this thread is now a whopping 84 pages...the only meaningful metric is the number of posts...lose the page counts, post counts are the futureOtis said:
[/hijack]
RageRhino
Footballguy
you are correct sir. only 21 pages for me.[hijack]Measuring threads in terms of pages is completely fla\/\/ed...people can change the number of posts per page for their account...in fact for me this thread is now a whopping 84 pages...the only meaningful metric is the number of posts...lose the page counts, post counts are the futureOtis said:
krista4
Footballguy
I can't believe we're at 2,090 posts. Wow.[hijack]Measuring threads in terms of pages is completely fla\/\/ed...people can change the number of posts per page for their account...in fact for me this thread is now a whopping 84 pages...the only meaningful metric is the number of posts...lose the page counts, post counts are the futureOtis said:
code
Footballguy
I can't believe we're at 2,090 posts. Wow.[hijack]Measuring threads in terms of pages is completely fla\/\/ed...people can change the number of posts per page for their account...in fact for me this thread is now a whopping 84 pages...the only meaningful metric is the number of posts...lose the page counts, post counts are the futureOtis said:[/hijack]
Disco Stu
Confirmed FBGal
I think you're wrong. Unless the new definition of "player" involves being loyal to the same woman for 12 years...Hope I'm wrong but seems to be a lot of players in this thread.
player = married chicks pining for pics of the men of fbg?Hope I'm wrong but seems to be a lot of players in this thread.
e-mom
Footballguy
Really? Who?player = married chicks pining for pics of the men of fbg?Hope I'm wrong but seems to be a lot of players in this thread.
ditka...mike ditka
Footballguy
how the heck do i get to the underground...someone pm me a link or somthing>?
dancingbones
Footballguy
It said somewhere way back in this thread to PM Disco Stu.
ditka...mike ditka
Footballguy
yeah...I think he sent me somthing before but I cant find it. Im a little slowww...
Keys Myaths
Pokerguy
Okay, second date went well, but here's the problem.
She's attractive, but only about a 6.5 on my scale. I'm attracted to her, and she's fantastic so far, but I'm worried that I'll get sick of the fact that she's not MORE attractive.
So, if I ask for a third date, then we go to a relationshipy place, and I don't even know if I want that.
See, this is why I like the secks and get rid of her route. Easier.
She's attractive, but only about a 6.5 on my scale. I'm attracted to her, and she's fantastic so far, but I'm worried that I'll get sick of the fact that she's not MORE attractive.
So, if I ask for a third date, then we go to a relationshipy place, and I don't even know if I want that.
See, this is why I like the secks and get rid of her route. Easier.
cubbyMIH
Footballguy
don't hate the player baby..........hate the game!Hope I'm wrong but seems to be a lot of players in this thread.
Keys Myaths
Pokerguy
Well, I'm not a good guy when it comes to women. Never claimed to be.I'm a great guy in EVERY other part of my life. But, it's the game. I'm 24, and I'm pretty sure I don't ever want to be married.So, #### it.Hope I'm wrong but seems to be a lot of players in this thread.
LHUCKS
Footballguy
This sounds exactly like the situation I'm in...she's a 7.5 and the attraction just aint gonna last. The key here is to not lead them on.
Keys Myaths
Pokerguy
But how do I do that, and see her again?She's a lot of fun. She's attractive enough. But, I don't want a relationship.
Capella
Footballguy
If she's looking for one, you move onto the next girl.
Keys Myaths
Pokerguy
A very good point, Cappy.
Keys Myaths
Pokerguy
14 User(s) are reading this topic (4 Guests and 0 Anonymous Users)
Seriously? Our dating lives aren't that interesting.
Seriously? Our dating lives aren't that interesting.
Slinger
Footballguy
XCapella's usually dead on, but he's been watching way too much Dr. Phil lately.
Have fun with her until all the cards are thrown on the table. She's not even sitting at the table yet. She wants dirty Keys secks, but doesn't want you to think she's a whore so she's giving you the whole I want to be in a relationship! shtick.
