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Stupid things you thought for much of your life (1 Viewer)

FUBAR said:
My family had me convinced that there were a lot of paper mills in Georgia that stank.

Almost every year growing up we would vacation in Florida, which meant a long drive from Michigan. When we would reach Georgia, the car would begin to stink. The excuse given was the paper mills. When I got older I realized the cause of the stench was much simpler and biological.
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If you were on 95, they weren't wrong, but those marshes smell like ripe ### too :shrug:

 
When I was a kid I understood the idea of live TV, the stuff the camera points at goes on TV. Simple. I didn't get the idea of TV shows or commercials being recorded and broadcast later. I used to think that people had to act out commercials whenever they were on. I remember being amazed that the dishwashing liquid lady could walk around the kitchen and could say her lines exactly the same way, every single time.

I might have been 7 or 8 when I had the facepalm moment.

 
shadyridr said:
Politician Spock said:
i used to think Internet Cafes were places where people who didn't own computers could go to browse the internet and buy coffee.
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they are
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Earlier on they actually were - at least for internet access - but I never actually saw one that served food or coffee.

Later, at least around here, they became video gambling places that circumvented the law by claiming to be internet cafes.

 
Thought roadrunners were large, flightless birds (like an ostrich) that ran fast as hell around the desert being chased by coyotes...then I went to AZ and saw one, so disappointing

 
until about a year ago i thought the uvula was actually your tonsil and I always wondered why people pluralized it as "tonsils" because there's clearly only one back there.

idk man.

 
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The Commish said:
FUBAR said:
My family had me convinced that there were a lot of paper mills in Georgia that stank.

Almost every year growing up we would vacation in Florida, which meant a long drive from Michigan. When we would reach Georgia, the car would begin to stink. The excuse given was the paper mills. When I got older I realized the cause of the stench was much simpler and biological.
Click to expand...
If you were on 95, they weren't wrong, but those marshes smell like ripe ### too :shrug:
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I despise I 95, the stretch from raleigh to Richmond especially. so happy to be away from that highway.

But we took 75.

 
When I was younger I used to not care if I skipped a meal. I might go a whole day and not eat til dinner. I'd just go outside and play all day without eating. I thought it wasn't a big deal.

Now I notice I'm always thinking about food and constantly eating. I look at people commuting to work and they are busy stuffing their mouths with food. I'm not sure when it happened but eating 4-5 times per day suddenly became very important. I've also put on weight.

 
Great thread.

Used to think my parents were joking about Santa and the tooth fairy, etc., so I just went along with it. I realized after I was 5 or 6 that they thought I believed it all. Being a smart kid, I just played it out for a few more years and they were none the wiser. Probably cashed in on an extra 10 teeth and some presents at Christmas as a result.

 
My buddies dad had the sex talk with him when we were in kindergarten so of course the next day he fills me in on how babies are made but after explaining it the correct way he says "or the dad can just suck on the moms boobs." So for a very long time I thought there were 2 options for procreation.

 
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In grade school, after hearing #### sucker used on the playground as an insult, I started using it.

I figured it had to be some sort of insult involving a rooster that I was not yet aware of but obviously was a good one to bust out.

Luckily I figured it out before using it in a disastrous situation.
 
FUBAR said:
My family had me convinced that there were a lot of paper mills in Georgia that stank.

Almost every year growing up we would vacation in Florida, which meant a long drive from Michigan. When we would reach Georgia, the car would begin to stink. The excuse given was the paper mills. When I got older I realized the cause of the stench was much simpler and biological.
Click to expand...
Your dad only fluffs in Georgia?

 
Das Boot said:
In grade school, after hearing #### sucker used on the playground as an insult, I started using it.

I figured it had to be some sort of insult involving a rooster that I was not yet aware of but obviously was a good one to bust out.

Luckily I figured it out before using it in a disastrous situation.
Click to expand...
I told another kid across the table in our CCD class "screw you" after seeing it in a movie. I figured it was just like "buzz off." Apparently it's a little worse and not proper for a Catholic setting. Kids and the teacher all looked horrified. I was just kinda like :shrug:

 
Das Boot said:
In grade school, after hearing #### sucker used on the playground as an insult, I started using it.

I figured it had to be some sort of insult involving a rooster that I was not yet aware of but obviously was a good one to bust out.

Luckily I figured it out before using it in a disastrous situation.
Click to expand...
When I first starting learning about sex I thought #### referred to the female organ. Glad I never busted that one out either.

 
When I was in third grade my best friend told me that if you had sex with a girl for too long that she could die.

 
My parents friends were always good about remembering my name and acting curious about what I was doing and I thought I must be wicked awesome and they really need to know these insights about my fort and floor hockey and guitar power chord skills. They were fortunate I was there for them and helped inform their deficiencies.

 
When I was 4 or 5 years old, I was under the impression that by the time I became an adult, I would have grown a second shlong. I would check myself every so often looking for any sign of sproutage.

How I got this idea into my head is a mystery to me.

My "theory" was shattered when I saw my grandfather emptying his bladder during a camping trip.

 
Das Boot said:
In grade school, after hearing #### sucker used on the playground as an insult, I started using it.

I figured it had to be some sort of insult involving a rooster that I was not yet aware of but obviously was a good one to bust out.

Luckily I figured it out before using it in a disastrous situation.
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I remember hearing this for the first time and thinking the same thing. And then thinking, no way, really?

It was that time where there was like a new "word of the week" that you were suppose to know the meaning of and always faked that you did.

I remember calling my best friend's dad across the street a ******* and thinking I was really cool doing so. An hour later my dad made me eat soap.

 
Related: my daughter is 7 and a half and still thinks geese eat people. It's caused some inconveniences in our life but I can't bring myself to come clean because her reactions sometimes make me laugh so ####### hard.

 
FUBAR said:
I was worried I might accidentally pee into the woman lucky enough to engage in intercourse with me.
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I actually asked this in our sex ed class in 5th or 6th grade.

 
top dog said:
My mother told me that if you left the knife in the tuna fish bowl in the fridge it would cause salmonella. I caused a mini panic at the restaurant I worked at when I was 16. I had the manager convinced that the metal pans we kept the tuna fish in was dangerous for a day. He put everything into plastic containers until the next day when he asked someone else about it. :lmao:
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:lmao:

 
In 3rd grade, some girl asked me if I was a virgin. The only time I had ever heard that word used was in reference to the Virgin Mary. And of course I wasn't a girl so I said of course not. So obviously she and her friends laughed and tittered.

But boy did I have the last laugh when two of the three were knocked up before 20 and I remained a virgin long after them...

 
I thought Elvis Costello was American...until I was in my 30‘s...and I play music and have covered some of his songs. Had no clue until I saw him on a talk show one night. Palm to head.

 
Otis said:
Das Boot said:
In grade school, after hearing #### sucker used on the playground as an insult, I started using it.

I figured it had to be some sort of insult involving a rooster that I was not yet aware of but obviously was a good one to bust out.

Luckily I figured it out before using it in a disastrous situation.
Click to expand...
I told another kid across the table in our CCD class "screw you" after seeing it in a movie. I figured it was just like "buzz off." Apparently it's a little worse and not proper for a Catholic setting. Kids and the teacher all looked horrified. I was just kinda like :shrug:
Click to expand...
Same here, but I said it to my mom. That was a rough lesson.

 
When I was a little kid I thought everyone went to school, then college, then got a job and got married and had kids; not just that everyone did this, but that all those events were basically the same sort of deal - your parents would send you off to school as a kid, and when you graduated your school would send you to college. Once you graduated from college, they would send you to a job and someone would assign you a wife and then kids. Sort of like the game Life.

 
My college girlfriend (who was indian [dot, not feather]) spent much of her youth assuming white people's poop was white.

 
My dad always told me when we went fishing that I had to be quiet so I wouldn't scare the fish away. I hate to admit that I was well into adulthood until I figured out that he just wanted me to shut the #### up!

 
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