Mr. Pickles
Footballguy
Sounds like someone has a little crush...
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"The Bachelor" on ABC (1 Viewer)
- Thread starter azgroover
- Start date
Gr00vus
Footballguy
Are you blogging this season?
Mr. Pickles
Footballguy
Seriously, Clark?
Zegras11
Footballguy
Get the #### Out!
Just giving credit where its due. All these guys are making the classic mistake of being too nice and overly complimentary and saying the perfect things (looking at you Sean). Ryan was actually a little refreshing after seeing time after time these guys fawn all over her. Women like a little edginess and dont like a guy who is going to worship the ground she walks on and peppers them with compliments. Arie seems to have a little ##### in him which is why hes the favorite. If that whole producer dating thing brings him down, then I think none of these wusses win. Sean is the obvious next choice but the guy is a freaking bore and Ms Hendrick will not marry an insurance agent. Arie at least has his dad's money to support herRyan just went a little over the top with it all, but had he toned it down, I think he wouldve made it pretty far.
Gr00vus
Footballguy
Sorry man, I get so bored with the episodes I lost interest in spending much more thought on this than the one or two sentences I dribble in here post mortem. Seeing you post here reminded me I enjoyed your write ups. Looks like I have my lunchtime reading set for the next few days as I take in your rehash of this tepidly amazing journey.
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Quint
Footballguy
a few thoughts:
- Little Ricky would have had fun in Croatia. she would have been "excited to be there."
- when this attempt to find a husband fails, she can always become a tour guide for Americans abroad.
- i didn't know UnderArmour made a wife-beater.
- no date in two years + eating on your one-on-one + "having a wonderful time with you today" = adios MFer.
- i hear that throwing umbrellas on the ground after you've been dumped in Croatia means you'll be lucky in love.
- "Brave" looks like a good movie.
- Croatia needs to work on their theatre seating.
- my guess is that the Croatian Calvary didn't strike much fear into anyone.
- the Bravery Cup is the green ribbon of the Croatian Highland games.
- apparently, Emily always spits out the salty stuff.
- line of the night: "I would have not seen that coming." - See you on Bachelor Pad!
- reading on your one-on-one date never works...unless you are trying to prove you can actually read.
- i wonder if the Fantasy Suite will come with a hole in the sheets, or if Emily will have to bring hers from home.
- Little Ricky would have had fun in Croatia. she would have been "excited to be there."
- when this attempt to find a husband fails, she can always become a tour guide for Americans abroad.
- i didn't know UnderArmour made a wife-beater.
- no date in two years + eating on your one-on-one + "having a wonderful time with you today" = adios MFer.
- i hear that throwing umbrellas on the ground after you've been dumped in Croatia means you'll be lucky in love.
- "Brave" looks like a good movie.
- Croatia needs to work on their theatre seating.
- my guess is that the Croatian Calvary didn't strike much fear into anyone.
- the Bravery Cup is the green ribbon of the Croatian Highland games.
- apparently, Emily always spits out the salty stuff.
- line of the night: "I would have not seen that coming." - See you on Bachelor Pad!
- reading on your one-on-one date never works...unless you are trying to prove you can actually read.
- i wonder if the Fantasy Suite will come with a hole in the sheets, or if Emily will have to bring hers from home.
Strange going with a Scottish theme in Croatia. They couldn't have done a detour to Scotland right after England to do that? The producers must think we're just stupid Americans and view Europe as some big conglomerate. They shoulda done a cross promotion with Game of Thrones being that they filmed in the same city and all.
Ryan was overly douchey, and he went to the well one too many times with the written notes. The first time the set-up was perfect with him big timing the other guy waiting to talk to her, this time she saw right through it and was clenching her teeth the whole time. I will say I think he almost changed her mind there at the end and that would of been a first if he pulled it off. LOL at the light blue shoes he was so proud of, he had to make a special mention of them.
Ryan was overly douchey, and he went to the well one too many times with the written notes. The first time the set-up was perfect with him big timing the other guy waiting to talk to her, this time she saw right through it and was clenching her teeth the whole time. I will say I think he almost changed her mind there at the end and that would of been a first if he pulled it off. LOL at the light blue shoes he was so proud of, he had to make a special mention of them.
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identikit
Footballguy
Always a funny read.
Gr00vus
Footballguy
Where else but in Dubrovnik can you go trolling for oysters and have the Scottish olympics? They really sucked the marrow out of the local flavor. I don't even think the once per season colorful local crazy guy was a native - that was not authentic Dubrovnik frontier gibberish he was spewing.I can't wait until they get to Prague - where they'll have a Tahitian fire dancing competition and an avocado festival.
Quint
Footballguy
if Emily parades around Prague in 4" stilettos and backless dresses after dumping her latest meathead, the Czechen mafia will grab her and put her to work in a brothel. worst happy ending ever.
krista4
Footballguy
Someone should let Travis know he's gay. It would save him a lot of time.
I don't understand anyone thinking Ryan has great game. He got the first one-on-one date and managed to parlay that into a top-eight finish. Meh. I did find him amusing, though. Now we just have bland and blander.
Looks like the Arie spoiler was true at least as to the relationship and Emily's overreaction to it. Not sure that it will really get Arie booted, though. He still looks like the only one she's truly interested in at this point.
I don't understand anyone thinking Ryan has great game. He got the first one-on-one date and managed to parlay that into a top-eight finish. Meh. I did find him amusing, though. Now we just have bland and blander.
Looks like the Arie spoiler was true at least as to the relationship and Emily's overreaction to it. Not sure that it will really get Arie booted, though. He still looks like the only one she's truly interested in at this point.
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General Malaise
Footballguy
General Malaise
Footballguy
Krista, if you're looking for the gay one, I think I have this one nailed. How about last night: Barbie: "Why didn't you kiss me"
Gay Jeff: "BECAUSE I WAS TERRIFIED!!!"
Oh yeah? The reason you didn't kiss her is because 'you were scared'? Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, I seem to recall that line from the gay kid in Clueless. In fact, I think he WAS the gay kid in Clueless. Same hair, same mannerisms, same affinity for penis. There is no way in hell that man is straight.
So Ryan plucks the hairs from his fingers and takes 3 hours to get ready? Man, does that make me feel better about my appearance. I take 3 minutes to get ready and the only thing I pluck is the the cherries out of my Manhattans. He shaves his legs? I guess you have to if you wear blue shoes like that. His list was comical, as was his plea to the producers to not edit him to look poorly. No need, dildo. See you on Bachelor Pad.
Anybody try and watch that abortion of a show ABC had on afterwards? It made Big Brother look like Mad Men. Just when I think we have reached the very bottom of the network television cess pools, ABC comes along and prove that there is far more crap down there than we ever dreamed of. I gave it an honest 10 minutes. I'm not kidding when I say this - I'd rather pluck every hair out of my ### and watch 700 Club than try this thing again. Just brutal.
Joe T
Footballguy
lol.I'm not afraid to quit something very early on. I made it for 2 or 3 minutes.
General Malaise
Footballguy
And he is only the THIRD gayest one of this group.
krista4
Footballguy
identikit
Footballguy
@1fJefProbably his twitter handle.And it's "Jef". One "f" for the extra gay.
Mr. Pickles
Footballguy
Mr. Pickles
Footballguy
2/10. Would watch again for the boobs.
Quint
Footballguy
nice.
Mr. Pickles
Footballguy
Well, I have been drinking.
Gr00vus
Footballguy
Quint
Footballguy
lubrication = creativity (and spite if you're drinking gin)
Mr. Pickles
Footballguy
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pantherclub
Footballguy
What a clustereff this show has become. For starters Emily is just dumb, straight uneducated dumb and what makes it worse is when she tries to describe something and uses big words that have a totally different meaning. What is her deal with having to kiss each and every contestant? So odd, so bizarre and so anti Emily that we have been force fed. Also unless there is more to the story than what we know then I honest to God dont see what the "drama" is that Arie dated someone 10 years ago. There has to be more to come out, Emily cannot be that big of a drama queen when she is tonguing 8 dudes and asking why they didnt kiss her sooner.
This show needs to be blown up and start over again. The changing on the fly with the 2 roses just sucked as did the perpetual Chris Harrison's "Final rose of the evening". No #### dude those guys are not blind its right in front of them.
This show needs to be blown up and start over again. The changing on the fly with the 2 roses just sucked as did the perpetual Chris Harrison's "Final rose of the evening". No #### dude those guys are not blind its right in front of them.
offdee
Footballguy
Will you accept my hose?
Ray Karpis
Footballguy
The Farmer Ted/Caroline Mulford comparison is spot on.
...nice work!
...nice work!
General Malaise
Footballguy
'Gr00vus said:'Mr. Pickles said:
That's good.
General Malaise
Footballguy
Slider6
Footballguy
honky kong
Footballguy
Abraham
Footballguy
How about this: reboot the show with two bachelors and they alternate giving out roses. If a girl accepts from one guy, she gets a 1:1 with him and a group date with the other guy before the next rose ceremony. And if they turn down a rose from guy 1 bc they'd rather have a 1:1 with the other guy and he doesn't offer then she's gone. When it gets down to 6 or 7 girls than the dudes split the roses and a girl can accept from both.
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Mr. Pickles
Footballguy
I want Annie to accept my hose.
krista4
Footballguy
Prague: Where everyone is in parkas while Emily wears shorts.
OneFJef doing himself no favors on the "I'm not gay" front by complimenting Emily on her nail polish.
Wolf can take solace in losing Emily by making millions renting out the space on his forehead.
WTF happened to turn Chris into Mr. Looneypants?
OneFJef doing himself no favors on the "I'm not gay" front by complimenting Emily on her nail polish.
Wolf can take solace in losing Emily by making millions renting out the space on his forehead.
WTF happened to turn Chris into Mr. Looneypants?
Ray Karpis
Footballguy
Doug and Chris are equally big ######s. Both psychos. Both provided some of the more cringe-worthy moments in recent memory.
Sean made some strides this week.
Sean made some strides this week.
honky kong
Footballguy
Between all this and the bit about Arie's fling nine years ago, this had to be the weirdest episode in the history of the franchise.I was a little disappointed that after I heard Emily's comments on "imagining all the people that have stood here lookin' at this clock" that it wasn't followed up in the dungeon by her saying something about "imagining all the people who've had a hot poker shoved up their ### in this place". Perhaps it ended up on the cutting room floor.
Gr00vus
Footballguy
I'm sure
thinks he's found the perfect beard to try and put one over on the compound and heavenly father, but I think Emily will be flipping things on him and going multiple husbands - she'll pal around and have girl time sleep overs with Jef, Sean will take care of her biannual sexual needs, and Ari gets to be the sappy, mooning, romantic puppy dog. No future for Chris though. That brand of intense craziness has no place in homogenizemily's world.ETA Rick Roll.
thinks he's found the perfect beard to try and put one over on the compound and heavenly father, but I think Emily will be flipping things on him and going multiple husbands - she'll pal around and have girl time sleep overs with Jef, Sean will take care of her biannual sexual needs, and Ari gets to be the sappy, mooning, romantic puppy dog. No future for Chris though. That brand of intense craziness has no place in homogenizemily's world.ETA Rick Roll.
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offdee
Footballguy
I wanna date the hell out of you, and marry you hard.
Zegras11
Footballguy
I was thinking the same thing. There were several parts I didn't want to watch.
I was a little disappointed that after I heard Emily's comments on "imagining all the people that have stood here lookin' at this clock" that it wasn't followed up in the dungeon by her saying something about "imagining all the people who've had a hot poker shoved up their ### in this place". Perhaps it ended up on the cutting room floor.
Mr. Pickles
Footballguy
Big delay on this week's write up. You wouldn't believe how long these things take. That Was A Clown Episode, Bro
Gr00vus
Footballguy
That screen cap of Doug/Emily was 
.You missed a Rick Roll opportunity on the "This" of the "This never made it on the primetime broadcast..."
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