McGarnicle
Footballguy
"Hi. My mom's had a boatload of substance abuse issues and gave me this token of her sobriety. Now I know we've said 10 words to each other, but I want you to have this coin so I can try and guilt you into keeping me around for hometown dates, and then you can give it back to her. I promise: it won't be very awkward at all."
First thing I thought -- thanks for letting me know before I became emotionally invested. Usually it takes 4 or 5 dates before the baggage starts to reveal itself.

it's good to see Soulja Boy found time in his busy, busy schedule.