Very Interesting Op Ed by Brandon Marshall (1 Viewer)

[Hipple Long Ware & Peete]

This guy is gonna have a BIG year. But that is besides the point here. Just saw an interview w BMars on ESPN about this piece. worth watching (i'll post a link If one is up yet)

lets-use-junior-seau-tragedy-as-opportunity-to-learn

Wow! Wait? What? Junior Seau was shot? How? Why? They’re saying suicide?’’

Question after question went through my head after I heard the tragic news Wednesday.

Immediately, my heart began to hurt. What I felt was a deep pain, a deep compassion for this situation beyond Junior, his kids, his family, his teammates and his friends.

There are many people out there who are suffering and have nowhere to turn for help or are afraid because of the stigmas placed on mental health.

As I began to meditate more on Junior’s death, I began to think about this vicious cycle our world is in. The word ‘‘validate’’ started to run through my mind.

The cycle starts when we are young boys and girls. Let me illustrate it for you:

Li’l Johnny is outside playing and falls. His dad tells him to get up and be strong, to stop crying because men don’t cry.

So even from the age of 2,

our belief system begins to form this picture. We are teaching our boys not to show weakness or share any feelings or emotions, other than to be strong and tough.

Is that ‘‘validating’’?

What do we do when Li’l Susie falls? We say: ‘‘It’s OK. I’m here. Let me pick you up.’’

That’s very validating, and it’s teaching our girls that expressing emotions is OK.

We wonder why it’s so hard to bridge the communication gap between men and women.

This presented itself clearly when I was going through group therapy and was the only man in my groups. Better yet, I was there for three months, and there was only one other guy in the program.

In therapy, I learned how to express my emotions and talk about my problems, then apply it to my real life. I had to work through my entire belief system, train myself how to think, not what to think, and let go of the things that had me in bondage.

I had to bridge the gap. It wasn’t going to do it on its own. It’s a cycle.

Can you imagine how this presents itself even more so in football players?

Junior Seau, Kenny McKinley, Dave Duerson, Brandon Marshall, etc. I am the only one in that group who is living because I got help before it was too late.

In sports, those who show they are hurt or have mental weakness or pain are told: ‘‘You’re not tough. You’re not a man. That’s not how the players before you did it.’’

Someone like Junior Seau.

So your perception of a man or player gets distorted.

Focusing more on this issue, we see more and more professionals doing research on the brain and head trauma in retired athletes. I respect their science and their research on CTE (chronic traumatic encephalopathy) and how they think it might be associated with depression and dementia, but we can’t recognize CTE until the autopsy.

We can, however, start today by treating the living. Treatments that helped me — but that I think we all can benefit from — are dialectical behavior therapy and metallization therapy.

Looking at the situation with Seau and other cases with retired athletes, I think our focus should be more on why the transition seems to be so hard after football.

As athletes, we go through life getting praised and worshipped and making a lot of money. Our worlds and everything in them — spouses, kids, family, religion and friends — revolve around us. We create a world where our sport is our life and makes us who we are.

When the game is taken away from us or when we stop playing, the shock of not hearing the praise or receiving the big bucks often turns out to be devastating. The blueprint I am creating for myself will help not only other athletes, it will help suffering people all over.

We must break the cycle, and that starts with prayer and by seeking help. By understanding the pain,

we can replace the hurt

with love.



Brandon Marshall is a wide receiver for the Bears.

 

[NJDawgPound]

I couldn't be more impressed with that article.

He nails it.

 

[DoubleG]

I couldn't be more impressed with that article. He nails it.

This makes more sense to me than the Koonce article - and in many ways addresses the more "real" issues. Maybe Marshall's situation has caused him to look at this more deeply than most, but whatever the reason, this certainly rings truer than some of the crybaby crap in Koonce's piece.While I think they are both pointing to the same thing, Marshall seems to be willing to say some of the things that Koonce either doesn't seem to get or is afraid to say. Specifically, the root causes - the fact that we as a society put football and it's players on a pedestal, both financially and as people...at least while they're playing.Thanks for posting it.

 

[metoo]

I saw him on First Take yesterday and he comes across as a likeable guy and I hope he's finally got his act together.

 

[az_prof]

I saw him on First Take yesterday and he comes across as a likeable guy and I hope he's finally got his act together.

He is a smart guy. Hopefully he finally has his life on track. I know critics will say 'don't talk the talk, walk the walk.' And I agree. At the end of the day we are judged more by what we do than say. But if he fails, it isn't because he lacks awareness or understanding. It is pretty clear that he is very insightful.

 

[Mark Wimer]

I saw him on First Take yesterday and he comes across as a likeable guy and I hope he's finally got his act together.

He is a smart guy. Hopefully he finally has his life on track. I know critics will say 'don't talk the talk, walk the walk.' And I agree. At the end of the day we are judged more by what we do than say. But if he fails, it isn't because he lacks awareness or understanding. It is pretty clear that he is very insightful.

Marshall may be smart and articulate, but he also has a really difficult syndrome to deal with - Borderline Personality Disorder is really hard for everyone (including the afflicted person, but also all his coworkers, friends, family). I sincerely hope he's got a handle on his illness, but I worry that once the pressure of the season is back on the syndrome will rear it's ugly head again.

 

[flapgreen]

His background leads you to believe he's your typical mindless thug, but he's far from it. He's got some serious problems, though.

 

[lord_helmet]

He had me untill the word "prayer", do not lean on religion it will only make you more distanced from reality

 

[NJDawgPound]

He had me untill the word "prayer", do not lean on religion it will only make you more distanced from reality

Just because one leans on religion and prayer does not necessarily mean they are distanced from reality.

 

[Phenix]

I saw him on First Take yesterday and he comes across as a likeable guy and I hope he's finally got his act together.

I always liked Marshall, but then again, I stay away from the media and do not let a few REAL mistakes change the way I view someone. Also, I believe drama can just follow someone when it is never brought on by them just looks that way.His woman stabs him... its his fault.He has a fake accusation, but because its him and the media hates him, he did it.He kicked a football, doesnt bother me, I like when people have a personality even if it makes a few mad while hurting no one.I'm not saying he is a role model, but he is not the menace everyone thinks he is. In my opinion.

 

[Phenix]

He had me untill the word "prayer", do not lean on religion it will only make you more distanced from reality

Really man?Regardless of your take on religion, to act like many do not worship shows how distant from reality you really are.I, for one am not religous, but to act like others cant represent their beliefs in an article just shows a lack of understanding.Again, I am not religous and sorry if I offend you, but I'm offended at the fact you think people cant write about religion and their beliefs in order to be "validated."

 

[lord_helmet]

What I meant was do not think religion is the cure, sorry for offending.

 

[mr roboto]

He comes across as a guy who is trying like hell to battle himself, but will probably always screw up big every now and then.

Look at Meta World Peace Artest. Was very vocal about therapy, donated his ring IIRC to mental health charity, then cold coks Harden with an elbow. Hate to think what kind of mess these guys would be w/out the shrinks.

 

[Vector]

He had me untill the word "prayer", do not lean on religion it will only make you more distanced from reality

Maybe you could discuss your beliefs with Tim Teebow

 

[Slapdash]

I couldn't be more impressed with that article. He nails it.

This.

 

[benson_will_lead_the_way]

He had me untill the word "prayer", do not lean on religion it will only make you more distanced from reality

Really man?Regardless of your take on religion, to act like many do not worship shows how distant from reality you really are.I, for one am not religous, but to act like others cant represent their beliefs in an article just shows a lack of understanding.Again, I am not religous and sorry if I offend you, but I'm offended at the fact you think people cant write about religion and their beliefs in order to be "validated."

 

[ffldrew]

I saw him on First Take yesterday and he comes across as a likeable guy and I hope he's finally got his act together.

He is a smart guy. Hopefully he finally has his life on track. I know critics will say 'don't talk the talk, walk the walk.' And I agree. At the end of the day we are judged more by what we do than say. But if he fails, it isn't because he lacks awareness or understanding. It is pretty clear that he is very insightful.

It's a shame he didn't have his #### together earlier - Darrent Williams sure would have wished he had been smarter. He still hasn't learned much in my opinion - he has no business being out in public at night clubs getting into fights with people based on his previous track record. Until he stays away from these types of places he will be a loser in my book.

 

[benson_will_lead_the_way]

I saw him on First Take yesterday and he comes across as a likeable guy and I hope he's finally got his act together.

He is a smart guy. Hopefully he finally has his life on track. I know critics will say 'don't talk the talk, walk the walk.' And I agree. At the end of the day we are judged more by what we do than say. But if he fails, it isn't because he lacks awareness or understanding. It is pretty clear that he is very insightful.

It's a shame he didn't have his #### together earlier - Darrent Williams sure would have wished he had been smarter. He still hasn't learned much in my opinion - he has no business being out in public at night clubs getting into fights with people based on his previous track record. Until he stays away from these types of places he will be a loser in my book.

Same could be said of Ray Lewis...he turned his life around.

 

[ffldrew]

I saw him on First Take yesterday and he comes across as a likeable guy and I hope he's finally got his act together.

He is a smart guy. Hopefully he finally has his life on track. I know critics will say 'don't talk the talk, walk the walk.' And I agree. At the end of the day we are judged more by what we do than say. But if he fails, it isn't because he lacks awareness or understanding. It is pretty clear that he is very insightful.

It's a shame he didn't have his #### together earlier - Darrent Williams sure would have wished he had been smarter. He still hasn't learned much in my opinion - he has no business being out in public at night clubs getting into fights with people based on his previous track record. Until he stays away from these types of places he will be a loser in my book.

Same could be said of Ray Lewis...he turned his life around.

Haven't heard of Ray getting in fights at clubs after that which is evidence that he's gotten it - Brandon can't say the same.

 

[benson_will_lead_the_way]

I saw him on First Take yesterday and he comes across as a likeable guy and I hope he's finally got his act together.

He is a smart guy. Hopefully he finally has his life on track. I know critics will say 'don't talk the talk, walk the walk.' And I agree. At the end of the day we are judged more by what we do than say. But if he fails, it isn't because he lacks awareness or understanding. It is pretty clear that he is very insightful.

It's a shame he didn't have his #### together earlier - Darrent Williams sure would have wished he had been smarter. He still hasn't learned much in my opinion - he has no business being out in public at night clubs getting into fights with people based on his previous track record. Until he stays away from these types of places he will be a loser in my book.

Same could be said of Ray Lewis...he turned his life around.

Haven't heard of Ray getting in fights at clubs after that which is evidence that he's gotten it - Brandon can't say the same.

Did Brandon get in a fight? Charges were dropped...you need to let it go bitter bronco fan

 

[Shutout]

I used to characterize this guy as a knucklehead. I'm really glad to see this article come out and have this type of information in it and to come from him makes it even better because it shows some real growth and maturation in a guy that may have been on the wrong side in the past.

 

[ffldrew]

I saw him on First Take yesterday and he comes across as a likeable guy and I hope he's finally got his act together.

He is a smart guy. Hopefully he finally has his life on track. I know critics will say 'don't talk the talk, walk the walk.' And I agree. At the end of the day we are judged more by what we do than say. But if he fails, it isn't because he lacks awareness or understanding. It is pretty clear that he is very insightful.

It's a shame he didn't have his #### together earlier - Darrent Williams sure would have wished he had been smarter. He still hasn't learned much in my opinion - he has no business being out in public at night clubs getting into fights with people based on his previous track record. Until he stays away from these types of places he will be a loser in my book.

Same could be said of Ray Lewis...he turned his life around.

Haven't heard of Ray getting in fights at clubs after that which is evidence that he's gotten it - Brandon can't say the same.

Did Brandon get in a fight? Charges were dropped...you need to let it go bitter bronco fan

Why would I be bitter - he's a cancer and I'm glad he's gone - sadly due to his actions so is Darrent Williams. That I won't let go.