What's your preferred greeting method? (1 Viewer)

[mr. furley]

You're out in public, you run in to a friend/acquaintance/co-worker and stop for a quick hello.

friend/acquaintance/co-worker introduces their friend/spouse/significant other to you.

what's the go to response? 

a wave? a handshake? hug? Euro kiss? icy stare?

 

[fruity pebbles]

Hey

 

[Godsbrother]

Dog sniffs not an option?

 

[Leroy Hoard]

Swift kick in the balls.

 

[Van Dyman]

Pole is broken. Where are the colored dots?

 

[ChiefD]

I like a good old-fashioned "howdy".

 

[El Floppo]

In the last week due to corona, the handshake has been replaced with the fist bump and the kiss on the cheek with full frontal sex.

 

[Hawks64]

In the last week due to corona, the handshake has been replaced with the fist bump and the kiss on the cheek with full frontal sex.

Guess I need to get back to NYC GB

 

[Hawks64]

Some combo of the above depending on who it is. Co-worker would be a hey and good friend would be a hug. Anyone in between could be a handshake or fist bump. Right now with the beer flu running rampant full body condoms are required for anything other than nodding.

 

[arrow1]

hump their leg

 

[Jaysus]

It started as shtick intended purely to amuse me, but now I am full-time trying to force fist bumps on people. It is so awkward sometimes, I love it. 

ETA: why did I have to answer the poll to reply to this thread?

 

[gianmarco]

I just work my way down that list above doing each greeting until it gets way too uncomfortable or I score.

 

[wikkidpissah]

licking

 

[heckmanm]

Where's the "1/4 inch head raise with 'Sup?" option?

 

[msommer]

You're out in public, you run in to a friend/acquaintance/co-worker and stop for a quick hello.

friend/acquaintance/co-worker introduces their friend/spouse/significant other to you.

what's the go to response? 

a wave? a handshake? hug? Euro kiss? icy stare?

It depends.

If it is a buddy, then manhug, good woman friend, kiss on cheek, Brazilizan woman 1-3 cheek/air kisses depending on state they are from. Acquaintance/coworker either sex, handshake. Coronavirus vector, elbow bump or as per @heckmanm above

 

[wikkidpissah]

HATE the shakehug.

Friendfam get hugs cuz i'm enormous & i hug enormous and evvybody loves it. Acquaintances/introductions get handshake and i've made it a point for decades to shake women's hands the same way i shake men's hands.

 

[Man of Constant Sorrow]

Combo. 

Handshake for professional & acquaintances. 

Hugs for most family. 

Fist bump for my 85 yo Pop. He initiated this about 7 years ago. I have no clue why, but I roll wit it. 

 

[otb_lifer]

HATE the shakehug.

Friendfam get hugs cuz i'm enormous & i hug enormous and evvybody loves it. Acquaintances/introductions get handshake and i've made it a point for decades to shake women's hands the same way i shake men's hands.

frottage down?

 

[Sullie]

Where's the "What's up + head nod" option?

 

[TheIronSheik]

I like to ignore people until HR gets involved. That's my preferred method.

 

[wikkidpissah]

frottage down?

*sings Boston song* 

It's more than a greeting
When I play that old trick on the subway
I begin dreaming
'Til closer i move while my hips still sway
 I see my merry work walkin' awayyyyyyyyyyyyyyAAAAAAY

 

[jon_mx]

Hail Victory!

 

[The Big Donkey]

Francis may be right

 

[The Noid]

friend/acquaintance/co-worker introduces their friend/spouse/significant other to you.

what's the go to response? 

I once had a co-worker introduce me to his spouse, while visiting him in the office, and as I extended my hand to her, he intercepted the handshake on her behalf like a pro-bowl DB jumping a rookie WR's route. Never got an explanation, but always assumed she must have had a germ phobia because the whole thing went down like he'd done a hundred times before. 

 

[otb_lifer]

*sings Boston song* 

It's more than a greeting
When I play that old trick on the subway
I begin dreaming
'Til closer i move while my hips still sway
 I see my merry work walkin' awayyyyyyyyyyyyyyAAAAAAY

i have the perfect gif for this, but ... well 

 

[Osaurus]

I use file cards with canned greetings on them and use them randomly with those I meet. 

 

[need2know]

hows it going? Glad you had a chance to see me

 

[Cjw_55106]

Dog sniffs not an option?

So Biden wins a couple states and this is what we've come to? 

 

[mr. furley]

Pole is broken. Where are the colored dots?

 

[mr. furley]

I use file cards with canned greetings on them and use them randomly with those I meet. 

this is actually genius level shtick

 

[Leroy Hoard]

I use file cards with canned greetings on them and use them randomly with those I meet. 

Good idea. Maybe it would also work with fortune cookies.

https://www.webdesigndev.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/01/181.jpg

 

[Leroy Hoard]

So Biden wins a couple states and this is what we've come to? 

Bloomberg would have paid a dog to sniff you.

 

[-OZ-]

It started as shtick intended purely to amuse me, but now I am full-time trying to force fist bumps on people. It is so awkward sometimes, I love it. 

ETA: why did I have to answer the poll to reply to this thread?

I fist bump the kids in my youth group. (Never with adults)

Is that wrong? 

 

[grateful zed]

stream crossing, followed by a sword fight.

 

[gbill2004]

I whip it out. 

 

[moleculo]

Me: How are ya now?

Friend: good, n you?

Me: oh, not so bad.

Sometimes the cadence gets messed up when we both try to lead with the "how are ya now".  Makes for an awkward conversation.

 

[That one guy]

I HATE the bro hug with aggressive/exaggerated slapping of hands for the handshake to bring someone in.  HATE it!  I feel like every time I’m forced into it a White Claw 12-pack is born and someone has their collar popped.  
 

The older I’ve gotten (soon to be 40) the more my disdain for it has grown.  Like, okay Bryce, we friggin planned this dinner at The Ale House...it’s not special, we do it weekly and we hung out two days ago anyway!

I do like to slap it high or just a quick fist bump.  I only get hugs from my Dad and even those are rare. 
 

Anywho

aulyShoreWeaselFingers:

What’s up buddy

 

[Leroy Hoard]

Seriously, hugs should be saved for relatives and intimate friends, or both.

 

[grateful zed]

Seriously, hugs should be saved for relatives and intimate friends, or both.

puppies?

 

[Mister CIA]

Pure awkwardness is my go-to.

 

[That one guy]

puppies?

People I’ve known my whole life:  “up top, that’s it...fist bump if you’d prefer Auntie”

Random Dog On The Street, covered in mud:  “oh my god!  Get in the car!!!  We’re going to the vet, getting you cleaned up and checked out.  Yep, go ahead and shart on the floor board, you must not feel well”

 

[cockroach]

I like going for the fist bump then switching it once they commit then I shake their fist.  

 

[Zegras11]

in the butt, Bob

 

[The Future Champs]

No “frotting” option?

 

[sports_fan]

Awkward smile and quick “Hey how’s it going?”. Goal is to get out of the situation as quickly as possible without causing offense 

 

[The General]

Hug friends, handshake some work dude If it’s some momentous occasion, say hi to everyone else. 

 

[Leroy Hoard]

Awkward smile and quick “Hey how’s it going?”. Goal is to get out of the situation as quickly as possible without causing offense 

And if you can't remember their name, say goodbye with a "nice seeing you bub".

 

[Terminalxylem]

It started as shtick intended purely to amuse me, but now I am full-time trying to force fist bumps on people. It is so awkward sometimes, I love it. 

ETA: why did I have to answer the poll to reply to this thread?

I'm with you. It's fun to approach open-handed, then close the fist last second for an awkward fist shake. Better yet, bait-and-switch with open arms inviting a hug turned gut-punch.

 

[Terminalxylem]

Need to add an option for footshake.

 

[peaces]