Jump to content
Fantasy Football - Footballguys Forums

GM's Thread About Everything/GM's Thread About Nothing

General Malaise

By General Malaise,
in Footballguys Free For All

 Share Followers 2

Recommended Posts

Henry Ford

Henry Ford 60,520

Posted
Posted

Me: what time do I need to get you up from your nap to make our reservations on time? I booked a private room and we are already being charged at 8.

Her: No problem, I'll be ready at 7.

 

 

Guess.  Just guess whether she's ready to leave at 7:45.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Replies 87.3k
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

  • Officer Pete Malloy

    5008

  • General Malaise

    4491

  • El Floppo

    4251

  • kevzilla

    3113

Popular Days

Top Posters In This Topic

Popular Days

Popular Posts

Henry Ford

Moo.

Homer J Simpson

HELLO FROM REHAB!!!!   Not sure if anything's been shared but Sunday dinner at my parents' a couple weeks ago was in fact an elaborate ruse to stage an intervention.  Actually it wasn't very

heckmanm

Everybody take a minute tonight (or today) to raise a glass to HeckDad.  My sister just called to tell me that he passed away at home.  Don't have details other than he fell, but he was 94 with a bad

Posted Images

tommyboy

tommyboy 4,629

Posted
Posted
11 minutes ago, kevzilla said:

I don't know what drink is appropriate for Sharknado 4: The Fourth Awakens, but I'm going with Drambuie and iced tea. Seems right.

Everclear and grape Fanta

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites
mr. furley

mr. furley 12,761

Posted
Posted
5 minutes ago, Henry Ford said:

Me: what time do I need to get you up from your nap to make our reservations on time? I booked a private room and we are already being charged at 8.

Her: No problem, I'll be ready at 7.

 

 

Guess.  Just guess whether she's ready to leave at 7:45.

she'll be sound asleep at 7:45

Link to post
Share on other sites
Phil Elliott

Phil Elliott 1,150

Posted
Posted
4 hours ago, Henry Ford said:

"Plus, the hooker I ordered from Craigslist still had a landing strip when I specifically ordered someone shaved.  At least she brought her sister."

Dancing establishment for gentlemen in Austin called The Landing Strip. It's near the airport. ;)

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
-fish-

-fish- 14,423

Posted
Posted (edited)

Just ate the salmon with corn on the cob, garlic mashed potatoes and asparagus with cranberries and feta.  Amazing.  

Never made this recipe before, but in case someone wants to try it:

1.  Catch salmon.

2.  Cure fillets overnight (at least 12 hours) with a mix of equal parts kosher salt, cane sugar and brown sugar, with some coarse pepper.  

3.  Rinse then dry fillets.

4.  Dust with sweet and savory rub:

     1/4 cup paprika

      1/3 cup brown sugar

      tablespoon kosher salt

      tablespoon garlic powder

5.   Smoke at low temp (160) until fish hits about 130

6.    Raise temp to 200-225 until fish hits 145-150.  Mine took 4 hours for the whole cooking time.

I did this on a Traeger, so using a traditional smoker I'd just smoke it around 215 for about 3 hours.

Edited by -fish-
  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites
nightmare

nightmare 235

Posted
Posted
37 minutes ago, Henry Ford said:

Me: what time do I need to get you up from your nap to make our reservations on time? I booked a private room and we are already being charged at 8.

Her: No problem, I'll be ready at 7.

 

 

Guess.  Just guess whether she's ready to leave at 7:45.

"Already being charged at 7", wouldn't have worked?

Link to post
Share on other sites
DA RAIDERS

DA RAIDERS 5,024

Posted
Posted

7 hours in to my daughters 10th bday slumber party. :banned:. Wife has retreated upstairs. Just me and 5 ten year old girls watching some horrible movie. I'm out of things to clean up...good times

 

im gonna go check the alcohol content on those giant oil cans of beer Clayton gray sent me...maybe there's a 8+ %er

 

clarification:. I've been drinking the whole time

Link to post
Share on other sites
Henry Ford

Henry Ford 60,520

Posted
Posted

Also, private room was for karaoke because she loves it.  Yes, we are weird.

Entire night was ruined because she was apparently trying to drunkenly serenade me and I tried to sing with her which is apparently singing over her and making her believe that I hate her voice.  I don't get it.  In every possible sense tonight.

  • Like 5
Link to post
Share on other sites
Righetti

Righetti 4,131

Posted
Posted
10 hours ago, Abraham said:

My hotel bar is closed for a six month renovation even though I called them a week ago to make sure the renovation was complete. The restaurant stops serving brunch at 10 and I slept until 10:30.  The gift shop is out of sunscreen. And there is an event starting at 4 at the pool which means the second half of my afternoon of laying by said pool. has been impacted.  

Such a rough life.  Why are things so hard?

You may as well move to Australia 

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
Binky The Doormat

Binky The Doormat 13,096

Posted
Posted
3 minutes ago, Henry Ford said:

Also, private room was for karaoke because she loves it.  Yes, we are weird.

Entire night was ruined because she was apparently trying to drunkenly serenade me and I tried to sing with her which is apparently singing over her and making her believe that I hate her voice.  I don't get it.  In every possible sense tonight.

 

This is the weirdest hooker date story I have ever heard.

So you like to pretend you've been married to them for years?

 

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
-fish-

-fish- 14,423

Posted
Posted
15 minutes ago, Binky The Doormat said:

This is the weirdest hooker date story I have ever heard.

So you like to pretend you've been married to them for years?

 

Hookers are way cheaper, more punctual and less maintenance.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
Binky The Doormat

Binky The Doormat 13,096

Posted
Posted
Just now, -fish- said:
16 minutes ago, Binky The Doormat said:

This is the weirdest hooker date story I have ever heard.

So you like to pretend you've been married to them for years?

 

 

Hookers are way cheaper, more punctual and less maintenance.

 

That's why he would only do it for a couple of hours.  

Link to post
Share on other sites
DA RAIDERS

DA RAIDERS 5,024

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, DA RAIDERS said:

7 hours in to my daughters 10th bday slumber party. :banned:. Wife has retreated upstairs. Just me and 5 ten year old girls watching some horrible movie. I'm out of things to clean up...good times

 

im gonna go check the alcohol content on those giant oil cans of beer Clayton gray sent me...maybe there's a 8+ %er

 

clarification:. I've been drinking the whole time

so my kid, aka the host, has fallen down the stairs, sort of, minor tears.  ate #### during the silly string fight in the street, quasi major tears.  came down stairs and had to sit by herself for a while because everyone was fighting, small annoying tears.  here's the cherry on top...right at bed time, i smacked her in the head with a new stuffed animal that, unbeknownst to me, had giant, rock hard eye balls.  major tears...accompanied by her friends laughing at her/the situation..gee, this is going well. :mellow:  wife decides to emerge at this point and hit me with the guns of navarone.  there isn't enough booze.  women are neat.

 

latest update:  they're all laughing and raising hell in her room.

latest latest update..daughter just came out of her room crying..."everyone wants to go home"  room is still erupting in laughter.  

latest latest latest update:  mood of the room is positive..sort of..at least my kid isn't crying :unsure:     

 

my kid needs to toughen up.  

 

this will never happen again

  • Like 4
Link to post
Share on other sites
berndog

berndog 977

Posted
Posted
19 hours ago, General Malaise said:

Start with zest of a lime or lemon - I prefer a lime

1TBSP brown sugar

2 tsp each: paprika (smoked if you got it), thyme, garlic powder, onion powder, cracked black pepper

1 tsp each: oregano, cumin, kosher salt, Tony's or Old Bay (which I realize is a mixture of things already listed). 

1/2 tsp - 1tsp cayenne, depending on heat preference.  I'm using smoked chipotle pepper flakes for a smokey flavor

1/2 tsp nutmeg

Mix and add to your salmon after applying a thin rub of olive oil.  

Cook skin side down on a well greased grill over medium heat - 350ish.  Cook 3 minutes, carefully filp for another 3 minutes, flip back again for 3 minutes, take off and rest it a few.  

Easily one of the most requested meals for guests and family alike.

 

So many blackened seasonings are way to salty so this one looks like a winner to me. 

 If you want to get the professional looking grill marks you have to go flesh side down on a well oiled grill. 

Link to post
Share on other sites
mr. furley

mr. furley 12,761

Posted
Posted
7 hours ago, Henry Ford said:

Also, private room was for karaoke because she loves it.  Yes, we are weird.

Entire night was ruined because she was apparently trying to drunkenly serenade me and I tried to sing with her which is apparently singing over her and making her believe that I hate her voice.  I don't get it.  In every possible sense tonight.

none of us understand women. and when i say "us" i mean all of humanity. 

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites
5-ish Finkle

5-ish Finkle 3,398

Posted
Posted
3 hours ago, mr. furley said:

none of us understand women. and when i say "us" i mean all of humanity. 

 

Not 100% true.  You know who understands women?  Other women.  And they, in many cases, don't care for each other.

I suppose there's a lesson there, or something, but....boobs.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
tommyboy

tommyboy 4,629

Posted
Posted
8 hours ago, Henry Ford said:

Also, private room was for karaoke because she loves it.  Yes, we are weird.

Entire night was ruined because she was apparently trying to drunkenly serenade me and I tried to sing with her which is apparently singing over her and making her believe that I hate her voice.  I don't get it.  In every possible sense tonight.

1) drunk

2) woman

3) profit

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
General Malaise

General Malaise 28,019

Posted
  • Author
Posted
21 hours ago, cosjobs said:

Sounds really good. I might add a little freshly ground black cardamon and coriander seed

Yeah, I think I've added a little coriander in the past, so agree that a tsp of coriander would be well placed.  I don't think I can afford black cardamon since I've never heard of it. :bag: 

Link to post
Share on other sites
Frostillicus

Frostillicus 14,797

Posted
Posted
7 minutes ago, General Malaise said:

Yeah, I think I've added a little coriander in the past, so agree that a tsp of coriander would be well placed.  I don't think I can afford black cardamon since I've never heard of it. :bag: 

I went to put this in my recipe file and discovered I'd already put it in twice before.

Link to post
Share on other sites
General Malaise

General Malaise 28,019

Posted
  • Author
Posted
3 hours ago, berndog said:

So many blackened seasonings are way to salty so this one looks like a winner to me. 

 If you want to get the professional looking grill marks you have to go flesh side down on a well oiled grill. 

Well, I do flip the salmon so I get those grill marks.  But, you want to start skin side down because that's where all the good oils are, so when you heat the skin, those oils bubble up and into the fish.  So 3 minutes skin side down, carefully flip, then carefully flip and finish on the skin.  It'll peel right off when you're ready to serve.  And yes, make sure those grates are well oiled.  Came out perfect yesterday and had a nice grill basket filled with every color of bell pepper, pineapple and onion with some olive oil and blackened seasoning sprinkled in.  Heaven.

However, I overcooked my tri tip and hate myself for it. :kicksrock:  

Link to post
Share on other sites
berndog

berndog 977

Posted
Posted (edited)
1 hour ago, General Malaise said:

Well, I do flip the salmon so I get those grill marks.  But, you want to start skin side down because that's where all the good oils are, so when you heat the skin, those oils bubble up and into the fish.  

We will agree to disagree on this one but I have gravity working in my favor with the oils.  Glad you had some delicious fish to offset your tri tip disappointment :thumbup:

Edited by berndog
cant spell
Link to post
Share on other sites
Binky The Doormat

Binky The Doormat 13,096

Posted
Posted (edited)
7 hours ago, Henry Ford said:
15 hours ago, Binky The Doormat said:

This is the weirdest hooker date story I have ever heard.

So you like to pretend you've been married to them for years?

 

 
 

What, is that weird?

 
 

I am guessing the rest of the "date" goes:

- she has too much to drink and says she is horny

- she then creates some kind of scene at the bar/restaurant by being too drunk

- you say something wrong (you don't know what) and she ends up screaming obscenities at you

- you get her home and she passes out

- you do internet porn 

 

ETA:  somebody cries

Edited by Binky The Doormat
  • Like 3
Link to post
Share on other sites
-fish-

-fish- 14,423

Posted
Posted
3 hours ago, berndog said:

We will agree to disagree on this one but I have gravity working in my favor with the oils.  Glad you had some delicious fish to offset your tri tip disappointment :thumbup:

fish is always started skin side down.  this isn't up for debate.

Link to post
Share on other sites
tommyboy

tommyboy 4,629

Posted
Posted
2 minutes ago, -fish- said:

fish is always started skin side down.  this isn't up for debate.

not true.     Spring Salmon filet, I cut into 2 inch wide strips,   heat some butter in a frying pan and start it skin side up.   4 minutes per side on medium high heat and you get a medium  rare chunk of the most delicious salmon you'll ever eat, anywhere

Link to post
Share on other sites
Binky The Doormat

Binky The Doormat 13,096

Posted
Posted
17 minutes ago, tommyboy said:

not true.     Spring Salmon filet, I cut into 2 inch wide strips,   heat some butter in a frying pan and start it skin side up.   4 minutes per side on medium high heat and you get a medium  rare chunk of the most delicious salmon you'll ever eat, anywhere

 

Geezus - you really want to pick a fight about fish ...WITH A GUY NAMED "FISH"!!??

  • Like 5
Link to post
Share on other sites
SWC

SWC 16,049

Posted
Posted (edited)

boom sweet sassy molassy it is page one grando and since i only post here every once every five hondo pages like the harley comet of the gm thread i am dropping in to say hello gmers you guys and gals are awesome keep on keepin on and gming the hell out of this pace take that to the bank brochachos 

Edited by SWC
edited for grammer
  • Like 13
Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Restore formatting

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
 Share
Followers 2
Go to topic listing
×
×
  • Create New...