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What did you learn when you changed genders? (1 Viewer)

bostonfred

bostonfred

Footballguy
https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/k8xtps/nsfw_people_who_have_surgically_transitioned_into/

Awesome thread from reddit today. 

Some fascinating stuff about the transgender experience but also some stuff that's universally interesting.m

Some highlights 

"Men have absolutely no idea how much better women can smell. When your partner hints that you need to take a shower, you really need to trust them. I also don't get why we let men buy us perfume when they can't really tell them apart. My favorite bouquet of flowers is any variety of a bunch because I can smell all the different flowers most of which I never could before. Roses in contrast have a really strong scent which I am guessing all men can smell."

"And to answer this question at a basic level, I would note that peeing is sooo different. It’s been a few years and I’ve almost forgotten what it was like to pee before. I always hated the offensively loud way that men pee. Now the pressure is different? I guess I know why woman have always said we need to tinkle"

So many interesting comments and just open civilized discussion on a topic that a lot of us don't get exposed to. 

 
I remember when I was around 14-15 and I was complaining about how mowing the grass bothered my allergies and he told me "to quit being a little #####".

So I mowed the lawn.

But I don't remember ever "feeling" much difference from before that.  

 
So, when you choose to identify as a woman, your sense of smell improves? 🤔

I'll stay a dude for sure now.

 
I’ve got zero issues with what people want to do to themselves or with others (consensually). I honestly don’t care. 

I can’t help but worry there true trans people but twice as many confused young people who just haven’t decided who/what/they are that are making irreversible changes to themselves. 

 
FUBAR said:
So, when you choose to identify as a woman, your sense of smell improves? 🤔

I'll stay a dude for sure now.
Click to expand...
It's explained in a later post that it's the estrogen that does it.

I had a friend in college who had basically zero sense of smell. He was the worst to drive with because he'd fart in the car, roll the windows up and if you did the same back you were onky hurting yourself. 

 
bostonfred said:
It's explained in a later post that it's the estrogen that does it.

I had a friend in college who had basically zero sense of smell. He was the worst to drive with because he'd fart in the car, roll the windows up and if you did the same back you were onky hurting yourself. 
Click to expand...
I remember two things from my wife being pregnant.  Came home from work on a Friday, walked into our decently large apartment, and the first thing she says from across the room "have you been drinking beer?"   (note:  we had a beer fridge in the office, and every Friday half the office would sit around and drink a beer at 4pm before leaving work)  Second, made a peanut butter & jelly sandwich one day.  From across the room (again) she says "Ugh, is that peanut butter.  I'm going to be sick."

Even now without kids, she and my daughter have a ridiculous almost canine-like sense of smell.  Me?  Not so much.

 
bostonfred said:
https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/k8xtps/nsfw_people_who_have_surgically_transitioned_into/

Awesome thread from reddit today. 

Some fascinating stuff about the transgender experience but also some stuff that's universally interesting.m

Some highlights 

"Men have absolutely no idea how much better women can smell. When your partner hints that you need to take a shower, you really need to trust them. I also don't get why we let men buy us perfume when they can't really tell them apart. My favorite bouquet of flowers is any variety of a bunch because I can smell all the different flowers most of which I never could before. Roses in contrast have a really strong scent which I am guessing all men can smell."

"And to answer this question at a basic level, I would note that peeing is sooo different. It’s been a few years and I’ve almost forgotten what it was like to pee before. I always hated the offensively loud way that men pee. Now the pressure is different? I guess I know why woman have always said we need to tinkle"

So many interesting comments and just open civilized discussion on a topic that a lot of us don't get exposed to. 
Click to expand...
BF, I respect you for having enough interest in this topic to learn more.   A lot of these comments make me really glad to be a guy.   I just don't want to have to over-analyze so many of these things that seem trivial  (because it frees my brain up to over-analyze other things that are equally trivial but enjoyable to me).   Haha.

Seriously, thanks for sharing.

 
bostonfred said:
It's explained in a later post that it's the estrogen that does it.

I had a friend in college who had basically zero sense of smell. He was the worst to drive with because he'd fart in the car, roll the windows up and if you did the same back you were onky hurting yourself. 
Click to expand...
I figured it had to be the estrogen. (And no, I didn't read the article)

Totally agreed that pregnancy seems to create an almost super human sense of smell.  Taking my pregnant wife to a work function at a Thai restaurant did not go well. She still won't eat it.

 
Alex P Keaton said:
I remember two things from my wife being pregnant.  Came home from work on a Friday, walked into our decently large apartment, and the first thing she says from across the room "have you been drinking beer?"   (note:  we had a beer fridge in the office, and every Friday half the office would sit around and drink a beer at 4pm before leaving work)  Second, made a peanut butter & jelly sandwich one day.  From across the room (again) she says "Ugh, is that peanut butter.  I'm going to be sick."

Even now without kids, she and my daughter have a ridiculous almost canine-like sense of smell.  Me?  Not so much.
Click to expand...
same.  I got scolded for cooking a frozen burrito in the microwave.  20 seconds into cooking it.  She was upstairs in her bedroom. 

 
STEADYMOBBIN 22 said:
I’ve got zero issues with what people want to do to themselves or with others (consensually). I honestly don’t care. 

I can’t help but worry there true trans people but twice as many confused young people who just haven’t decided who/what/they are that are making irreversible changes to themselves.
Click to expand...
That just isn't the case.  Sorry to say it's just an uninformed opinion not represented by data on the subject.

 
The wife and I have a weekly cheeky argument about smells and colors. We have concluded over the past decade that our senses of sight, hearing, and smell are not the same but are perfectly healthy. We and are okay with that.

Both of us have good smell, I would consider mine is better as I am the amateur chef, enjoy craft beer, local wines, and have trained my nose kind of like training your ear for music. I have more range and can pinpoint things better, she lumps things in general categories.

This brings me to hearing. We have both been tested for work and came back 100% healthy with great hearing. My hearing is definitely better than hers in the context of everyday conversation and outdoor noise pollution, as she can mishear common conversation quite a bit especially at lower tones. But, comparing with music she wipes the floor with me. I have come to the conclusion I will never hear music like most people as I hear the tone, pitch, bass of peoples voices first and have to translate it to words. This stems from I'm guessing not being exposed to a lot of music growing up in a radio reception dead valley, and parents that didn't play a ton of songs at home. My wife can spot lyrics out of the metal songs clearer than someone speaking normal to her. On the other hand, I hear their voice as a note. It's the reason I love lots of rap, instrumental, and classic rock music. Clear defined lanes. Today's EDM I have no shot. Her brain just clicks with song lyrics when mine does not.

Lastly, we come to sight. We were both naturally near sighted, but clarity isn't the issue at hand, perception is. Color hue is a big deal for us. Both of us have passed large color blind variety tests and just see color different. Blue and greens hues are where the color changes for us and we get in the weekly fun argument about how wrong the other person is. We will forever be different in this and its fun. I see colors in a more blue hue and she things in a greener one. 

Hormones change people. It's all good. Live and learn.

 
STEADYMOBBIN 22 said:
I disagree with your opinion of my opinion and that I am not informed. 
Click to expand...
Here is a link to a larger report on a 2015 survey

I don't expect you to read the whole thing, but if you go to page 108, it discusses detransitioning. Only 8% detransition and most of those are temporary. More importantly, only 5% of those 8% do so because the gender transition wasn't right for them.  The vast majority who detransition do so because of pressure from others.

In other words, only about 0.3% of those who transition regret it and transition back.

So, your statement that you believe twice as many are doing so because they are confused is horribly inaccurate and is not based on any data whatsoever. Whether or not you want to consider your opinion on this informed is up to you. But it's simply not true. If you have any data to back up that claim, I'm open to reading about it.

 
gianmarco said:
Here is a link to a larger report on a 2015 survey

I don't expect you to read the whole thing, but if you go to page 108, it discusses detransitioning. Only 8% detransition and most of those are temporary. More importantly, only 5% of those 8% do so because the gender transition wasn't right for them.  The vast majority who detransition do so because of pressure from others.

In other words, only about 0.3% of those who transition regret it and transition back.

So, your statement that you believe twice as many are doing so because they are confused is horribly inaccurate and is not based on any data whatsoever. Whether or not you want to consider your opinion on this informed is up to you. But it's simply not true. If you have any data to back up that claim, I'm open to reading about it.
Click to expand...


Dude, I have zero interest in engaging with somebody who wants to be as smarmy as yourself. You keep up the good fight. 

Have a very Merry Christmas. 

 
STEADYMOBBIN 22 said:
Dude, I have zero interest in engaging with somebody who wants to be as smarmy as yourself. You keep up the good fight. 

Have a very Merry Christmas. 
Click to expand...
?

The first bolded sentence in your reply wasn't meant as any kind of dig.  It's a 300+ page document.  I was stating I'm not posting that link for you to read the entire report.  I certainly haven't.  If you want to, then that's awesome, but certainly not the expectation for me posting it.

As for the rest, I posted a link and briefly explained the data behind this issue.  You came into this thread and made a statement that is so far off of what the data shows and expect to not be challenged on it? 

I'm posting what I did to help educate you on this.  Unfortunately, your statement is not an uncommon sentiment shared by those who aren't aware of what goes into gender transition.  When you claim that 2/3rds of those that transition are just "confused" when the reality is that a huge minority feel the decision wasn't correct, do you expect your "opinion" to be considered valid?  I'm showing you actual data that demonstrates the exact opposite of what you said.  I'm open to being shown anything supporting your position. 

I'm sorry that you find someone challenging your opinion is "smarmy".  Not why I'm here.

 
STEADYMOBBIN 22 said:
I’ve got zero issues with what people want to do to themselves or with others (consensually). I honestly don’t care. 

I can’t help but worry there true trans people but twice as many confused young people who just haven’t decided who/what/they are that are making irreversible changes to themselves. 
Click to expand...
This was my worry too and I think it's really common to think this way. Common sense says that young kids make questionable decisions and end up regretting them. And it gets studied a lot to make sure that people don't make a huge mistake. 

Reality doesn't bear that out though, as gianmarco said. And it makes sense if you think about it.  First, kids make mistakes all the time, but very few people at any age make a mistake when it comes to deliberately changing their genitals.  This isn’t an earring, a bad haircut or a tattoo.  Second, there's a lot of study on exactly this topic. Third, doctors won't just perform surgery or prescribe hormones without thorough discussion and evaluation beforehand. And fourth, kids have access to so much more information now than we did growing up, they can talk to people who have already gone through it online, read about other people's experiences, good and bad, and understand what they are going through.  A poster here has a child who went through this process and it was really interesting to hear all the work he did before making his decision.  

I think the whole topic seems weird to us because people used to quietly suffer or cross dress and get mocked for it, but society is becoming more understanding and we are from a generation that is learning to understand progress led by younger folks, which is always difficult. It’s totally normal to need time to process this but hopefully we can all be open minded enough to let people enjoy their own lives the way they think is best. 

 
bostonfred said:
This was my worry too and I think it's really common to think this way. Common sense says that young kids make questionable decisions and end up regretting them. And it gets studied a lot to make sure that people don't make a huge mistake. 

Reality doesn't bear that out though, as gianmarco said. And it makes sense if you think about it.  First, kids make mistakes all the time, but very few people at any age make a mistake when it comes to deliberately changing their genitals.  This isn’t an earring, a bad haircut or a tattoo.  Second, there's a lot of study on exactly this topic. Third, doctors won't just perform surgery or prescribe hormones without thorough discussion and evaluation beforehand. And fourth, kids have access to so much more information now than we did growing up, they can talk to people who have already gone through it online, read about other people's experiences, good and bad, and understand what they are going through.  A poster here has a child who went through this process and it was really interesting to hear all the work he did before making his decision.  

I think the whole topic seems weird to us because people used to quietly suffer or cross dress and get mocked for it, but society is becoming more understanding and we are from a generation that is learning to understand progress led by younger folks, which is always difficult. It’s totally normal to need time to process this but hopefully we can all be open minded enough to let people enjoy their own lives the way they think is best. 
Click to expand...


I believe one of the posters here actually has TWO children that are/have already begun to transition. And I'm not sure if its the same person, but someone else mentioned that their kid's high school has like....I want to say.....like 7 or 8 trans kids, which just seems absolutely INSANE to me.  (I mean....what are the odds? As far as I know, I've never met a trans person in my entire life....and there's EIGHT in one high school?)

I sort of feel the same way as mobbin, but as Gianmarco has said, the studies that have been done clearly dont bare that out. 

For as many issues as we have as a society, we really have come an insanely long way on these sorts of issues. I remember 18-20 years ago when I was in HS....our high school had ONE out gay kid (looking back, I can think of at least a handful of others who almost certainly were gay, but not out at the time).  One in a school of like 2,000 students. And this wasn't in some rural or super religious area of the country....it was in suburban, NJ.  Now, he didn't exactly have the easiest time back then (there's #######s in every high school, and he was involved in a pretty violent (and very one sided) "fight" that would absolutely be national news if it happened today) so its easy to understand why there weren't more.  I can't imagine how much #### a transitioning teenager must have taken back then.  God that must have been rough.

 
TLEF316 said:
As far as I know, I've never met a trans person in my entire life..
Click to expand...
You almost certainly have, but like you said, you just didn't know it.

There's roughly 1.5 million people in the US that identify as transgender. It's roughly 0.5%.

So, not a huge number, but not insignificant either. In a high school of 1000 kids, you'd expect about 5 based on those numbers.

 
TLEF316 said:
I just don't see how that figure is possibly accurate.  1 in 200? I just don't buy that. 
Click to expand...
Link #1

This report utilizes data from the CDC’s Behavioral Risk Factor Surveillance System (BRFSS) to estimate the percentage and number of adults who identify as transgender nationally and in all 50 states. We find that 0.6% of U.S. adults identify as transgender. This figure is double the estimate that utilized data from roughly a decade ago and implies that an estimated 1.4 million adults in the U.S. identify as transgender.  State-level estimates of adults who identify as transgender range from 0.3% in North Dakota to 0.8% in Hawaii.

Link #2

PLAIN-LANGUAGE SUMMARY

We used data from national surveys to estimate the population size of transgender people in the United States. Estimates of the number of transgender adults significantly increased over the past decade, with a current best estimate of 390 per 100 000 adults. That is about 1 in every 250 adults, or almost 1 million Americans.

 
TLEF316 said:
And I'm not sure if its the same person, but someone else mentioned that their kid's high school has like....I want to say.....like 7 or 8 trans kids, which just seems absolutely INSANE to me.  (I mean....what are the odds? As far as I know, I've never met a trans person in my entire life....and there's EIGHT in one high school?)
Click to expand...
I think this is probably referencing me.  I don’t know for sure that there’s 8 trans kids in my son’s high school, that was just speculative.  I only personally know of three and one of them graduated already, but it’s a big high school and I only know a small fraction of the kids there.

 
gianmarco said:
Link #1

This report utilizes data from the CDC’s Behavioral Risk Factor Surveillance System (BRFSS) to estimate the percentage and number of adults who identify as transgender nationally and in all 50 states. We find that 0.6% of U.S. adults identify as transgender. This figure is double the estimate that utilized data from roughly a decade ago and implies that an estimated 1.4 million adults in the U.S. identify as transgender.  State-level estimates of adults who identify as transgender range from 0.3% in North Dakota to 0.8% in Hawaii.

Link #2

PLAIN-LANGUAGE SUMMARY

We used data from national surveys to estimate the population size of transgender people in the United States. Estimates of the number of transgender adults significantly increased over the past decade, with a current best estimate of 390 per 100 000 adults. That is about 1 in every 250 adults, or almost 1 million Americans.
Click to expand...
I understand that a few studies estimate figures in that range, I just don't see how its possible.  

I can't prove that they're wrong,  so there's really no point in starting a long conversation.  

 
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