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GM's thread about nothing (43 Viewers)

quote name='krista4' date='Jun 17 2010, 09:05 AM' post='11957402']

General Malaise said:
Mr. Pickles said:
krista4 said:
Celph Titled said:
Mr. Pickles said:
You don't have a driver's license? This is kind of weird.
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Did you just drive around without one, or did you not drive at all?
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I know plenty of people in Chicago and NY without licenses, since most people don't have cars. It was only because we moved to god-forsaken Tennessee that he needs to get it. :shrug:
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Sorry, it's still weird.
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I think it would be weirder if he never HAD a driver's license ever in his past or had never successfully driven a car before. I dated a girl in my mid 20's (a single mother, no less) who refused to drive. No license, never tried it, had no desire. Now THAT freaked me out. I let her drive a rental car I had one time and it was like turning the keys over to Toonces. She was screaming and hysterical; I was ready to jump out of the car. Course, it really made it easy to break up with her since we lived on opposite sides of the river and she never crossed over unless I was driving her. I just stopped calling altogether and figured if I ever saw her again, it would be because I was in her neighborhood. She cursed me out a few times on voicemail and said she was breaking up with me, which was perfect. It was the easiest break up I've ever had. I had some bad ones. Course she hated me and eventually saw me in a bar a few months later. She shouted out to everyone that could hear (including my new GF) that I gave her the clap. Classy.

You know what else I find odd? Adults who can't swim. Not as bad as adults who don't drive or have never driven, but really kind of strange. How can you grow up and not learn how to swim?
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I don't know how to ride a bike. :wub: somehow I just neglected to learn growing up, and then at some point it became too embarrassing to try./quote]

Okay now I smell a spinoff thread littered with polls.

ETA: http://forums.footballguys.com/forum/index...howtopic=536090

 
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shuke said:
E-Z Glider said:
General Malaise said:
shuke said:
Dear anyone who will ever stay in this hotel room who plans on walking around on this carpet barefoot: I'm sorry.
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:shrug: :lmao: :lmao: Wait, what???
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:unsure: Id like to hear this story as well.
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There's really not a story. You ever try to rub semen into low pile carpeting in order to hide it? It doesn't really go anywhere.
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Let that be a lesson to you. Next time aim for the WebTV keyboard or the courtesy hair dryer like you-know-who's sig says.
 
Disco Stu said:
You two should go on together. Then under your names where it normally says "married" or "brothers" or whatever it can say "iFriends". :lmao:
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:lmao: Can see it now: Caroline and Krista"Never actually met before"
 
boom king said:
Frostillicus said:
General Malaise said:
You know what else I find odd? Adults who can't swim. Not as bad as adults who don't drive or have never driven, but really kind of strange. How can you grow up and not learn how to swim?
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My wife's sister never learned to ride a bike. She's now 25 with two kids, and the older one is a bike rider, but she still won't learn. I keep fantasizing about scenarios where she has to ride a bike in order to win a million dollars or something. That way when she can't I can just laugh and point at her.
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is your wife's sister hot? cuz this is how im imagining her
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She ain't awful, but she ain't that either.
 
YSR said:
Disco Stu said:
You two should go on together. Then under your names where it normally says "married" or "brothers" or whatever it can say "iFriends". :goodposting:
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:lmao: Can see it now: Caroline and Krista"Never actually met before"
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I would pay good money to see GM and shuke run the Amazing Race. shuke: "we're in last place anyway let's just stop for a sandwich"
 
SuperJohn96 said:
Bob Sacamano said:
And remind him the FIRST TWO THINGS he should do when he gets in the car are adjust his mirrors so he can see and put his dickmitten in the glove box.
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Step 1. Open the glove boxStep 2. Put your dickmitten in that glove box.Step 3. Make krista4 open that glove box.I like to read it and pronounce it as G-Love Box.
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They seem to be an interesting couple. He can't drive. She can't ride a bike. She claims constant use of an insult he won't let her take credit for creating. I'm trying to envision what that initial meetup was like.
 
"Non-biker who looks twenty years younger than she really is ( :eek: ) seeks intelligent man for long walks on the beach and Sunday crossword puzzles. Non-driver is OK as long as you can create insults by randomly combining names for genitalia and cold weather articles of clothing. ilife required. Packers fans need not apply."

 
SuperJohn96 said:
General Malaise said:
I went to a concert last night to see a buddy of mine I went to high school with. Long ago, he was part of Thin Ice, the hard rocking band that featured Chris Holt, Danny Mayfield, Rob Giles and a rotating door of singers and rhythm guitar players. I took harmonica lessons in an attempt to latch on with the band, but 5 lessons in it was clear I wasn't cut out for music. When you fail at the harmonica, it's a clear sign that you suck. The only person that enjoyed my harmonica playing was my pet ferret Seymour, who had this strange behavior of running out from under the couch to climb me like a squirrel when she heard it playing. Anyhow, I acted as the 'band manager' through out high school, meaning I just carried instruments and listened to them practice endlessly.

Rob Giles and Chris Holt both continue to play to this day, Chris rocking the Dallas Club Scene, while Giles tours and writes songs that get air time on TV shows in generic dramatic sequences. Both are quite talented, but I think the ceiling has been reached for both. But that's not what this is about.

Seems as if Giles parlayed his musical success into luck with the ladies as his wife joined him last night for the concert and introduced herself to me and my wife after the show. A stunning gal who looked vaguely familiar, I later learned that she is an actress (Caterina Scorsone ) on ABC's "Private Practice" and formerly the star of some Canadian show called 1-800 Missing, or some such. Anyhow, not the coolest story in the world, but I don't get out much and I certainly don't meet too many people who act or play music for a living. I was shocked that Giles remembered me as we hadn't seen each other since 1991. His wife was very charming and incredibly nice. I don't watch much non-reality, non-sports TV, but I might have to check this show out just to watch her.
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From her IMDB page http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0778741/WTF?

26. When the Dark Man Calls (1995) (TV) .... Angie
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Just watched Edge of Darkness the other day, she played Gibson's daughter's hippy friend, one scene with her in it almost made me #### my pants because I had the surround sound turned up.
 
YSR said:
krista4 said:
Frostillicus said:
General Malaise said:
You know what else I find odd? Adults who can't swim. Not as bad as adults who don't drive or have never driven, but really kind of strange. How can you grow up and not learn how to swim?
Click to expand...
My wife's sister never learned to ride a bike. She's now 25 with two kids, and the older one is a bike rider, but she still won't learn. I keep fantasizing about scenarios where she has to ride a bike in order to win a million dollars or something. That way when she can't I can just laugh and point at her.
Click to expand...
There's a school in Massachusetts that teaches adults to ride. I really want to--looks like a lot of fun. I'd like to try out for The Amazing Race but there's usually something involving bike riding. :goodposting:
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You would pick it up in no time. Seriously. No need to go to an adult school (unless, of course, it's just an excuse to go to Massachusetts).I want to go on the Amazing Race too but there always seems to be some sort of jumping out of planes/bungee jumping/SOMETHING INVOLVING GREAT HEIGHTS AND POTENTIAL LEAPS TO MY DEATH. :goodposting:
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The food challenges would destroy me. I have no issues throwing down in a race to eat a cheeseburger with Usain Bolt speed...but some of the things they force the contestants to eat would be impossible for me to choke down.
 
General Malaise said:
YSR said:
krista4 said:
Frostillicus said:
General Malaise said:
You know what else I find odd? Adults who can't swim. Not as bad as adults who don't drive or have never driven, but really kind of strange. How can you grow up and not learn how to swim?
Click to expand...
My wife's sister never learned to ride a bike. She's now 25 with two kids, and the older one is a bike rider, but she still won't learn. I keep fantasizing about scenarios where she has to ride a bike in order to win a million dollars or something. That way when she can't I can just laugh and point at her.
Click to expand...
There's a school in Massachusetts that teaches adults to ride. I really want to--looks like a lot of fun. I'd like to try out for The Amazing Race but there's usually something involving bike riding. :goodposting:
Click to expand...
You would pick it up in no time. Seriously. No need to go to an adult school (unless, of course, it's just an excuse to go to Massachusetts).I want to go on the Amazing Race too but there always seems to be some sort of jumping out of planes/bungee jumping/SOMETHING INVOLVING GREAT HEIGHTS AND POTENTIAL LEAPS TO MY DEATH. :goodposting:
Click to expand...
The food challenges would destroy me. I have no issues throwing down in a race to eat a cheeseburger with Usain Bolt speed...but some of the things they force the contestants to eat would be impossible for me to choke down.
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You realize that this was out loud and that shuke reads this thread, yes?
 
jplvr said:
St. Louis Bob said:
:goodposting: I just realized Monday that I never changed the oil on my edger. Ever.
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Did anyone ever cover this, or am I missing the point? I've been staring at this post for a good minute trying to figure out if I should clue him in, or if I should be the one getting the hint.
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:goodposting: jeep, welcome! I'm pretty sure SLB is telling the truth here. I'm also pretty sure that if you walk him through it, he'll still never change the oil. Ever. And when it catches fire, he'll throw it in his neighbors garbage and buy a new one.
 
General Malaise said:
YSR said:
krista4 said:
Frostillicus said:
General Malaise said:
You know what else I find odd? Adults who can't swim. Not as bad as adults who don't drive or have never driven, but really kind of strange. How can you grow up and not learn how to swim?
Click to expand...
My wife's sister never learned to ride a bike. She's now 25 with two kids, and the older one is a bike rider, but she still won't learn. I keep fantasizing about scenarios where she has to ride a bike in order to win a million dollars or something. That way when she can't I can just laugh and point at her.
Click to expand...
There's a school in Massachusetts that teaches adults to ride. I really want to--looks like a lot of fun. I'd like to try out for The Amazing Race but there's usually something involving bike riding. :goodposting:
Click to expand...
You would pick it up in no time. Seriously. No need to go to an adult school (unless, of course, it's just an excuse to go to Massachusetts).I want to go on the Amazing Race too but there always seems to be some sort of jumping out of planes/bungee jumping/SOMETHING INVOLVING GREAT HEIGHTS AND POTENTIAL LEAPS TO MY DEATH. :goodposting:
Click to expand...
The food challenges would destroy me. I have no issues throwing down in a race to eat a cheeseburger with Usain Bolt speed...but some of the things they force the contestants to eat would be impossible for me to choke down.
Click to expand...
Are you thinking of Survivor? What nasty food happens in AR? I don't remember anything too out there but i haven't seen every season.
 
EYLive said:
YSR said:
Disco Stu said:
You two should go on together. Then under your names where it normally says "married" or "brothers" or whatever it can say "iFriends". :eek:
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:lmao: Can see it now: Caroline and Krista"Never actually met before"
Click to expand...
I would pay good money to see GM and shuke run the Amazing Race. shuke: "we're in last place anyway let's just stop for a sandwich"
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:bag: :X :lmao: Could you imagine the verbal warfare we'd exchange in the back of an Indian cab in dead last?
 
zander_s said:
Are you thinking of Survivor? What nasty food happens in AR? I don't remember anything too out there but i haven't seen every season.
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They do them in both, though the AR food challenges aren't nearly as disgusting as the Survivor ones. Still, they have had to eat some pretty gross stuff and in large quanity too. Lots of vomitting in some of these scenes.
 
General Malaise said:
EYLive said:
YSR said:
Disco Stu said:
You two should go on together. Then under your names where it normally says "married" or "brothers" or whatever it can say "iFriends". :goodposting:
Click to expand...
:wub: Can see it now: Caroline and Krista"Never actually met before"
Click to expand...
I would pay good money to see GM and shuke run the Amazing Race. shuke: "we're in last place anyway let's just stop for a sandwich"
Click to expand...
:lmao: :lmao: :lmao: Could you imagine the verbal warfare we'd exchange in the back of an Indian cab in dead last?
Click to expand...
The best part would be the confusion of the other contestants. "Yeah, those guys are weird. Every morning, we hear some Van Halen song being played at full-blast, accompanied by yelling. Then it dies down and we just hear the eating sounds again."
 
General Malaise said:
EYLive said:
YSR said:
Disco Stu said:
You two should go on together. Then under your names where it normally says "married" or "brothers" or whatever it can say "iFriends". :goodposting:
Click to expand...
:wub: Can see it now:Caroline and Krista

"Never actually met before"
Click to expand...
I would pay good money to see GM and shuke run the Amazing Race. shuke: "we're in last place anyway let's just stop for a sandwich"
Click to expand...
:lmao: :lmao: :lmao: Could you imagine the verbal warfare we'd exchange in the back of an Indian cab in dead last?
Click to expand...
GM: Sorry shuke, I just couldn't eat those yak testiciclesShuke: OH BULL####!!

 
Celph Titled said:
General Malaise said:
EYLive said:
YSR said:
Disco Stu said:
You two should go on together. Then under your names where it normally says "married" or "brothers" or whatever it can say "iFriends". :yes:
Click to expand...
:lmao: Can see it now:Caroline and Krista

"Never actually met before"
Click to expand...
I would pay good money to see GM and shuke run the Amazing Race. shuke: "we're in last place anyway let's just stop for a sandwich"
Click to expand...
:lmao: :lmao: :lmao: Could you imagine the verbal warfare we'd exchange in the back of an Indian cab in dead last?
Click to expand...
The best part would be the confusion of the other contestants. "Yeah, those guys are weird. Every morning, we hear some Van Halen song being played at full-blast, accompanied by yelling. Then it dies down and we just hear the eating sounds again."
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:lmao: "Those innernet guys came back from being 2 hours behind to take first place during the shoulder cookie road block, but then fell back to last when the pale one fell asleep under a desk with an apple in his mouth."

 
I bet if we submitted our "Eat Off" with an interesting story line pitch to CBS, we could pique some interest.

Course our wives and bosses might tell us not to return from Ukraine.

 
General Malaise said:
jplvr said:
St. Louis Bob said:
:yes: I just realized Monday that I never changed the oil on my edger. Ever.
Click to expand...
Did anyone ever cover this, or am I missing the point? I've been staring at this post for a good minute trying to figure out if I should clue him in, or if I should be the one getting the hint.
Click to expand...
:lmao: jeep, welcome! I'm pretty sure SLB is telling the truth here. I'm also pretty sure that if you walk him through it, he'll still never change the oil. Ever. And when it catches fire, he'll throw it in his neighbors garbage and buy a new one.
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Answer 1: You don't have to change the oil... ever.orAnswer 2: You change the oil every time you change the gas.
 
General Malaise said:
I bet if we submitted our "Eat Off" with an interesting story line pitch to CBS, we could pique some interest.Course our wives and bosses might tell us not to return from Ukraine.
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Would love to see the introductions or the team names/titles when they pan to your segment."Jason and Forrest - Internet Friends" :yes:
 
EYLive said:
"Those innernet guys came back from being 2 hours behind to take first place during the shoulder cookie road block, but then fell back to last when the pale one fell asleep under a desk with an apple in his mouth."
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[Guy sitting with his wife who's a devout viewer and now watching Team GM/shuke in action for the first time]Aah, so this is the token gay couple, right?That guy is TOTALLY the catcher.[/Guy]
 
SuperJohn96 said:
EYLive said:
"Those innernet guys came back from being 2 hours behind to take first place during the shoulder cookie road block, but then fell back to last when the pale one fell asleep under a desk with an apple in his mouth."
Click to expand...
[Guy sitting with his wife who's a devout viewer and now watching Team GM/shuke in action for the first time]Aah, so this is the token gay couple, right?That guy is TOTALLY the catcher.[/Guy]
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Shuke and I might be mistaken for a lot of things....but I'm guessing gay isn't one of them. Neither one of us can dress, we're both portly and I'm guessing if asked to dance publicly, we might induce seizures in some people.
 
Celph Titled said:
Frostillicus said:
Celph Titled said:
Can I just post in here re: Game 7? :blackdot:
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Who's worse in there, Pat Patriot, Mr. Ham, or Timschochet? Seriously, those three guys make the usual Laker dorks seem normal.
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I think Timscoocher is the worst.
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I actually think he's the least offensive of the three. And I should have included MoP in there too. I can't stand the way he clearly doesn't know #### about basketball, but starts posting as if he's the expert because his "favorite team" is involved. Ham's the same way. Pat Patriot is a homer 'tard, and might be the worst one ever.
 
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