Is she going to therapy with you? Are you two doing any sort of counseling together?
If not, I'd bounce. She's not interested in making it work, imo.
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****Official**** depression thread (1 Viewer)
- Thread starter St. Louis Bob
- Start date
If not, I'd bounce. She's not interested in making it work, imo.
BobbyLayne
Footballguy
Socrates11
Footballguy
We are seeing a couple's counselor. She sends a lot of mixed signals. One moment she talks about the future as if we're still together, the next she says she has no idea what she wants and isn't sure if she wants to be vulnerable.
I'm fighting because my family is important and my kids are worth it. I also believe we had a very strong connection and can again. However I'm not naive and realize that she could ultimately decide to end it. I am making preparations and working on establishing strong support networks.
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ProstheticRGK
Footballguy
Prosopis and Socrates, thinking about you both and sending good juju your way.
prosopis
Arizona Chupacabra
How many kids do you have?
Would you try this hard with your wife if you did not have kids?
I remember before I had kids and I was much younger, hearing people say they stayed together for the kids. I always thought that was bs. Now that I am older and have more knowledge under my belt I get it. I have four kids and there is no way I would still be married if not for them. That goes for the mental stuff do, I believe the kids have prevented a divorce and possibly a complete mental one flew over the cuckoos nest breakdown. I have one kid left at home and he has three years of high school. A part of me worries about when he graduates. When he does I really have no reason to hold anything together and it's quite possible that is when I will lose it.
Socrates11
Footballguy
I have two kids, a son 15 and a daughter 13.
Fair question. I would definitely try, but I'm not sure I would try as hard as I currently am. I would still like to think it would serve as a wake-up call to address some personal issues. There are plenty of issues on her side as well, and I'm not sure she is giving them much attention, but I can't control that.
All that being said, I do love my wife. We had an amazingly powerful connection for a long time, and we both got complacent about it. Kids and life got in the way a bit, but we didn't tend our garden like we should have. It will be a shame if it ends now without both of us really trying to see if we can get it back.
CurlyNight
Footballguy
You will here. It's free too. And you can get help. You just ran into the wrong people. In CA there's a new phone line which you can call to talk to someone. Newsom got this going due to covid. With so many more suffering now, maybe your state or county or city has something set up. I'd check out their websites to see.
CurlyNight
Footballguy
Sorry to hear. I don't get the July deadline she's issued. Imo be prepared for the worst. Glad to hear you are establishing strong support networks. Maybe you can find a group that can help you sort stuff out, people going through the same thing. Support groups with like people are valuable.
Imagine life without her in detail. After the emotional part, think about how you would rebuild. You are kind of doing it with building support networks.This exercise isn't saying you are giving up. It makes you think and helps you should it not work out. Gl. xx
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Long Ball Larry
Footballguy
I agree ir sucks.
i encourage you to keep trying.
have just gone through a nightmare of a time with my daughter (well still ongoing on really) but it seems almost impossible to get help until it becomes a critical life or death situation.
its hard. I know from experience personally and through others. There are options and there can be helpful solutions. But the process sucks, no doubt. Please keep trying.
Fantasy_Freak
Footballguy
Has anyone gone through depression due to sleep disorders? I have not been to the doctor to get reviewed for any sleep disorders, but I am convinced the peaks and valleys of my moods is entirely due to my sleep issues. I go through highs and lows in life, more often than not there have been lows that I just cant dig myself out of. I could never do anything to myself, I just feel like I cant get anything right anymore and struggle through day to day.
nirad3
Footballguy
I had a "life event" almost 3 years ago which I most certainly won't and cannot go into details of here, but let's just say it was life-changing and got me in front of both a therapist and psychiatrist. The doc diagnosed me with bipolar disorder in about 15 minutes and after a quick survey type of thing. I have the "better" version (so to speak), meaning my swings aren't as pronounced. I don't lay in bed for days on end and then turn around and have a manic 3-day bender. My swings are less severe, and I always just figured it was my way of dealing with stress.
I've been on medication for bipolar depression for about 3 years now and I honestly don't know if it's done anything or not. I'm also on medication that is supposed to lessen my anxiety. I think that stuff might be working because my panic attacks have become less frequent and less severe.
I know a lot of my depression and anxiety are due to family issues that I don't want to go into details for here. And my work situation. I can't seem to find the right groove. That might be solved here in the coming weeks.
Also, reason I decided to post is because, following the pandemic-related changes to going to see therapists in person, I have been forgoing my therapy sessions since March. And to be honest, I think I've been in a better mental state since. I think going in to talk to my therapist really just brought bad past feelings up, things that I've seemed to bandage up. Maybe this isn't the best route... maybe in 2-3 years these issues will resurface and I'll not only be back to "square one" but could be even worse off.
I'm going to give it a month or so, wait for the in-person restrictions are lifted, and see where I'm at.
Keep on fightin' the good fight, e-friends.
I've been on medication for bipolar depression for about 3 years now and I honestly don't know if it's done anything or not. I'm also on medication that is supposed to lessen my anxiety. I think that stuff might be working because my panic attacks have become less frequent and less severe.
I know a lot of my depression and anxiety are due to family issues that I don't want to go into details for here. And my work situation. I can't seem to find the right groove. That might be solved here in the coming weeks.
Also, reason I decided to post is because, following the pandemic-related changes to going to see therapists in person, I have been forgoing my therapy sessions since March. And to be honest, I think I've been in a better mental state since. I think going in to talk to my therapist really just brought bad past feelings up, things that I've seemed to bandage up. Maybe this isn't the best route... maybe in 2-3 years these issues will resurface and I'll not only be back to "square one" but could be even worse off.
I'm going to give it a month or so, wait for the in-person restrictions are lifted, and see where I'm at.
Keep on fightin' the good fight, e-friends.
Rattle and Hum
Footballguy
You sound a lot like me. I feel my severe depression started along with insomnia 6-7 years ago. I take a pretty strong drug for sleep now but still struggle with depression and thoughts of self expiry. Perhaps the insomnia is only a symptom. I also should lose 12% of my weight and sometimes feel this contributes to my depression. Im hoping have the discipline to add working out when gyms open. I've been through most SSRIs without lasting results...also side affects are tough on me.
I hope that you can get on top of your situation soon., @Fantasy_Freak . You're right that lack of sleep can get out of control and really interfere with your mental health.
TheWinz
Footballguy
My wife seemed to sleep alot, but woke up tired all the time. I took her and she had a sleep study done. It was a recorded session, and it turns out, she had/has restless leg syndrome. I never really noticed it, but once the diagnosis came in, I can't unnotice it. My wife's feet are constantly moving, all day, every day. Not like spasms or anything, more like when a person just unknowingly starts moving to the beat of a song. But it only happens with her feet. Anyways, they prescribed her meds, and she wakes up with much more energy to get through her day. Good luck
BobbyLayne
Footballguy
Thanks for sharing. It’s not easy to disclose even in a relatively anonymous environment like this.I had a "life event" almost 3 years ago which I most certainly won't and cannot go into details of here, but let's just say it was life-changing and got me in front of both a therapist and psychiatrist. The doc diagnosed me with bipolar disorder in about 15 minutes and after a quick survey type of thing. I have the "better" version (so to speak), meaning my swings aren't as pronounced. I don't lay in bed for days on end and then turn around and have a manic 3-day bender. My swings are less severe, and I always just figured it was my way of dealing with stress.
I've been on medication for bipolar depression for about 3 years now and I honestly don't know if it's done anything or not. I'm also on medication that is supposed to lessen my anxiety. I think that stuff might be working because my panic attacks have become less frequent and less severe.
I know a lot of my depression and anxiety are due to family issues that I don't want to go into details for here. And my work situation. I can't seem to find the right groove. That might be solved here in the coming weeks.
Also, reason I decided to post is because, following the pandemic-related changes to going to see therapists in person, I have been forgoing my therapy sessions since March. And to be honest, I think I've been in a better mental state since. I think going in to talk to my therapist really just brought bad past feelings up, things that I've seemed to bandage up. Maybe this isn't the best route... maybe in 2-3 years these issues will resurface and I'll not only be back to "square one" but could be even worse off.
I'm going to give it a month or so, wait for the in-person restrictions are lifted, and see where I'm at.
Keep on fightin' the good fight, e-friends.
Regarding the bolded...I felt that. It is work to press in and dig deeper down. Sometimes you do come away from sessions feeling like “jeepers I am so broken, how is this ever gonna get better.” I think in the end the pandemic interruption will be a good thing for you. Maybe you needed a break.
Keeping fighting, brother. You’re worth it. There are people in your life who are depending on you being the best version of yourself. They’re worth battling for.
________________
About 5 months ago I decided I wanted to do a more intensive brand of therapy. I entered a Psychosocial outpatient program through the VA (I have comorbid acute PTSD and Major Depressive Disorder, aka Clinical Depression.) One of the prerequisites for doing their 5-day a week program - I opt in when available - is I needed to switch to a therapist in their program.
That part sucked because it’s difficult to establish trust with your therapist. NBD right, it can be done, just takes time. I hated that four months of good work was more or less flushed and I had to start over. It wasn’t much solace I was upgrading from a licensed Social Worker to a Psychologist. Frankly we didn’t exactly click from the jump.
After about three months of awkward sessions I shared my concerns with my PTSD small group. This is where being around other mentally ill vets** has really helped me a lot. The guys told me “Man, you gotta talk about that with your therapist. If you don’t trust them or think they’re too impersonal then say HEY THIS AIN’T WORKING FOR ME.” Some if these men have dealing with their issues for 30, 40 years. I listened and learned. Once I had that difficult conversation with Ira, things kind of opened up. Been having really good weekly 1-on-1 sessions for the last 7 weeks or so.
**you probably prefer a softer colloquialism; for me, admitting I have a mental illness and the goal is effective management rather than cure has been massively empowering.
One thing I like about Ira is he guides the conversation but doesn’t try to direct. So if we go into a particular area I don’t think is a concern anymore or I’m not ready for it’s cool. “Bro, I did CBT for Anger Mgt 5 years ago, I know how to deescalate myself. Let’s move on” There is one area, a pattern of destructive behavior, which I know we needed to delve into, but I told him 2 months ago “Not yet. That’s gonna be painful and a lot of work to unravel and with quarantine + other stuff I just don’t wanna do it rn.” We’ll circle back to it but I really appreciate that he trusts me enough to let me decide what we’re gonna work on.
Oh, and doubling my low dose Sertaline (Zoloft) 6.5 weeks ago was a great decision. Takes a lot more than just an effective Rx but I needed that given everything 2020 is throwing at us.
Keep keeping it real y’all.
Ignoratio Elenchi
Footballguy
Not a doctor and I've never taken either of those so I probably shouldn't even respond but here goes anyway. AFAIK, Prozac is an SSRI, which is a type of medicine used to treat depression. There are a bunch of different SSRIs that in theory all do basically the same thing but they work differently in different people so you sometimes have to try a few before you find one that's most effective for you. Wellbutrin is not an SSRI, it's also used to treat depression but it "attacks" it via a different mechanism. I don't know anything else about their differences; presumably like the rest of them, one works better than the other depending on the person.
Like I said I haven't taken either of those but I have taken two other SSRIs, and before I started each of them I remember wondering what I'd feel when I started. Basically, I felt nothing, which was simultaneously disappointing and a tremendous relief. I was kinda hoping it would make me feel happier or something? But I was also afraid it would mess with my brain, so the fact I felt nothing was ok with me. Obviously if I felt nothing, what's the point? Personally it's hard to pinpoint how it works or to what extent it helps, I can only say in hindsight that things were just better when I was on it and worse when I wasn't. It's actually pretty obvious when I think back over the last few years how it must have been helping even though I didn't notice at the time.
Based on my experience, can people tell you're on it? No, like I said, it's possible you won't even know you're on it. Basically like taking an aspirin for a headache, no one would have any idea you took one, and you wouldn't feel anything either, other than noticing at some point later that you no longer have a headache.
To make a small distinction, my wife went through some really bad postpartum depression and ended up on a pretty high dose of Zoloft (another SSRI), and similarly I couldn't tell when she'd taken it or anything - but once she was on it for a while, I could always tell when she hadn't. Like if she forgot to take it in the morning or her prescription ran out, she'd be kind of angsty and it became obvious to me that she hadn't taken it that day.
Again, all of this is based only on my own experience with different medications, so take it all with a grain of salt, but I remember being reluctant for a long time to try medications and now I'm glad that I did and wish I hadn't resisted for so long. So I just wanted to weigh in if you're in a similar boat.
E Street Brat
Footballguy
Im not a regular in this thread, but have been taking celexa for about 8 years now. Its been a real blessing for me and saved my marriage.
Edit to add.
I just came to realize Its also the reason im not a regular poster in this thread.
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El Floppo
Footballguy
All the love to you guys and gals.
Wishing I could get back into therapy...fighting the depression tooth and nail, but would benefit from pro help. Losing the job has sucked. Being broke and in increasing debt isn't helping. Not knowing how to personally or professionally fix any of that- especially with the pandemic- is the kicker. I know that some of my own issues are still a root cause- but knowing (and having gone through years of therapy in the distant past) isn't helping out me in a better spot...just kinda treading water.
Not having worthwhile insurance (back on the ACA after losing my job) will likely keep me from the help Im looking for.
Wishing I could get back into therapy...fighting the depression tooth and nail, but would benefit from pro help. Losing the job has sucked. Being broke and in increasing debt isn't helping. Not knowing how to personally or professionally fix any of that- especially with the pandemic- is the kicker. I know that some of my own issues are still a root cause- but knowing (and having gone through years of therapy in the distant past) isn't helping out me in a better spot...just kinda treading water.
Not having worthwhile insurance (back on the ACA after losing my job) will likely keep me from the help Im looking for.
BobbyLayne
Footballguy
@Ignoratio Elenchi kind of mirrors my experience with low dose Zoloft. I started taking 50 mg (which I think is the smallest dosage?) the day before Thanksgiving 2019. TBH I never noticed anything change through the Holidays. But around the first/second week of January, other people noticed a change in me & complimented me. “You’ve got more bounce in your step lately.” or “You seem like you are doing really well lately. Like you’re back to the energetic guy I used to know.”
I set a daily reminder on my iPhone to remind myself to take it the same time everyday. I did pretty good the first few months but sometime in February-March I missed a day. Was busy & didn’t do it right away, then spaced until the next morning. No noticeable effect but then I missed a second time a few weeks later. Missing two in fifteen days I really noticed a sharp difference; increased irritability the next day was my first clue. Felt like I wanted to isolate because I felt less in control. Took close to a month to kind of make it all the way back.
I’m not so great at articulating this because I’m just parroting what I’ve read and my experience has confirmed it. Takes a good 4-6 weeks to build up sufficient levels of the SSRI to enable your brain to increase your serotonin level. You go up a tiny step each day, which is why others notice the effects before you do. But when you miss a day (or two), it’s not like you go down a little. You fall off a cliff, and the clock restarts. Gonna take many weeks to slowly build it back up again.
Now when my phone vibrates, doesn’t matter what I am doing, I halt the conversation & step out, I make sure I treat that moment like it’s life or death. I don’t explain myself to anyone, I just excuse myself & apologize without comment when I come back a few moments later. I’ve seen what happens when I miss a day and I absolutely cannot let that happen again.
@prosopis glad to see asking questions. It’s super important to make informed decisions, do your own research, talk to others on the same drug. All that said, that’s just to give you a level of comfort. There’s no way to know how it’s going to affect you. You might find you have a laundry list of side effects or maybe 1-2 or maybe none. We all have different chemistry & our bodies are highly specific to how they react to SSRIs. But I’m glad that you’re thinking about giving it a shot, and I wish you all the best.
peace
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Long-story short, but I've been growing more frustrated, angry and at times, depressed. I withdrew from friends of mine, grew easily irritated, etc. This was from 2017-2019. I knew something was wrong, but it didn't come out of the time so I just dealt with it. About a year ago, I decided to try something different - my doctor referred me to a therapist. I have been seeing her new since last August. It was weekly meetings, then became bi-weekly and now we are beginning to do every 3 weeks.
She has helped me to change my thinking. Like everyone here, I will never be perfect, but I was commonly predicting worst case outcomes, assuming the worst, jumping to (negative) conclusions, worrying about things I couldn't control. Now, I am working on being open minded, asking questions, etc. and that is most of the battle. I feel like I have slowed down, and while I have my ups and downs, I am doing better.
I am on the Escitalopram (generic Lexapro) and have been taking it for about 6 months. It's hard to say that it works, but combined with a new mindset, I can't say it's hurting.
She has helped me to change my thinking. Like everyone here, I will never be perfect, but I was commonly predicting worst case outcomes, assuming the worst, jumping to (negative) conclusions, worrying about things I couldn't control. Now, I am working on being open minded, asking questions, etc. and that is most of the battle. I feel like I have slowed down, and while I have my ups and downs, I am doing better.
I am on the Escitalopram (generic Lexapro) and have been taking it for about 6 months. It's hard to say that it works, but combined with a new mindset, I can't say it's hurting.
BobbyLayne
Footballguy
I think my anxiety has anxiety.
wikkidpissah
Footballguy
BobbyLayne
Footballguy
BobbyLayne
Footballguy
naw - super grateful
just stressed out about a few things that are beyond my control
which manifests by second/third/fourth guessing everything I do & then I have more anxiety over not getting things done because I feel overwhelmed
waa supposed to do something I’ve been needing to do for awhile and I think I left my room 3-4 times today with the intention to hop on a train or a Citibike
and I got so wound up I ended up getting an upset stomach
my afternoon ended with me curled up in a ball on the bed taking a nap
managed to go get a delicious dinner & do a couple self care things tonight
it’s ####### exhausting trying to manage mental illness sometimes
wikkidpissah
Footballguy
mind you - good is better than perfect. 
you, 22.
you, 22.
BobbyLayne
Footballguy
anyway, it be like that sometimes
new day tomorrow
new day tomorrow
kutta
Footballguy
BobbyLayne
Footballguy
Roasted chicken
molto al dente penne (butter & basil)
steamed veggies
#simplepleasures
Angry Beavers
Footballguy
At a real low point. I don't know if there is anything for me in this world anymore. Not even in a sad way, more like in a wtf is the point anymore. I am lost. Depression sucks.
johnnycakes
Footballguy
You know this too shall pass. When I'm feeling like what's the point, I sometimes find it helpful to plan a trip. I enjoy traveling and it gives me something to look forward to. Going to Amsterdam in late October to chill out for a week. Don't know what else to say, but you have friends here at FBGs.
nirad3
Footballguy
I would look into getting a chat in with a therapist. It helped me tremendously. Just someone to listen, offer open-ended questions and offer some support.
Hoping for the best. I know how it is.
BobbyLayne
Footballguy
I've been struggling a lot this week. Yesterday was better than Monday. Today started off OK, had a good group session this morning. But just battling to get a couple simple things done and it's frustrating bc it's beyond my control.
Plus my meds that were mailed to me were sent back (RTS), and I run out on Friday. Have to make a special trip to Fort Hamilton (hour + from midtown) to pick up a refill.
Probably the most frustrating aspect of mental illness for me right is now how much effort it takes just to do basic minimum stuff. Makes me wonder if I'll ever get back to being anywhere close to the man I used to be. I just want normal things: rejoining the workforce, making memories with my kiddos, dating. Right now it's about all I can do to bathe, get dressed, remember to feed myself.
One good thing about my recent transition (see NYC Homeless Vet thread) is I am able to more fully participate in my VA PTSD outpatient program. I am going to most modules now instead of only a handful; before I didn't have access to a private room more than a few times a week. Temporarily in a Residence Inn and it's great being able to go to all my groups again. In a few more weeks I'm moving into my new apartment.
(ASIDE - that's my go to method for interrupting myself rn when I feel like I'm spiraling; I walk over to the mirror, smile, and say "new construction apt." Replace anxiety with Gratitude. easier said than done some days, but it works sometimes.)
Plus my meds that were mailed to me were sent back (RTS), and I run out on Friday. Have to make a special trip to Fort Hamilton (hour + from midtown) to pick up a refill.
Probably the most frustrating aspect of mental illness for me right is now how much effort it takes just to do basic minimum stuff. Makes me wonder if I'll ever get back to being anywhere close to the man I used to be. I just want normal things: rejoining the workforce, making memories with my kiddos, dating. Right now it's about all I can do to bathe, get dressed, remember to feed myself.
One good thing about my recent transition (see NYC Homeless Vet thread) is I am able to more fully participate in my VA PTSD outpatient program. I am going to most modules now instead of only a handful; before I didn't have access to a private room more than a few times a week. Temporarily in a Residence Inn and it's great being able to go to all my groups again. In a few more weeks I'm moving into my new apartment.
(ASIDE - that's my go to method for interrupting myself rn when I feel like I'm spiraling; I walk over to the mirror, smile, and say "new construction apt." Replace anxiety with Gratitude. easier said than done some days, but it works sometimes.)
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kutta
Footballguy
Sorry you're feeling so low Beavers. I know it's simple and trite, but have you tried just getting away for a few days? Just today I took a drive up to Northern Arizona, had lunch in the small town of Jerome, and drove around the beautiful mountains for a while. It's amazing what being in nature and turning off your phone can do to your state of mind.
prosopis
Arizona Chupacabra
Good advice. I was thinking of heading up to the flagstaff area myself and doing some car camping. I love Arizona.
Angry Beavers
Footballguy
moving the kid to college this weekend. Taking a couple of days away after that to see a buddy in Cincy. Hoping that helps. Thanks for the thought.
Long Ball Larry
Footballguy
Sorry to all. I know what it's like to suffer with this and also to see others suffer with this.
prosopis
Arizona Chupacabra
Thinking of you man. I am often where you are. I don't feel qualified to give any advice other than a couple days with your friend sounds like a good start to something. I am moving my daughter to college on the 14th and it is striking a chord and not a good one. She is my favorite and we are pretty close but I will be missing her more than she will miss me. It is an exciting time for a young kid. They are heading out on their own away from the nest. I remember how I couldn't wait to get away from home. Being on the other side of it is not that easy.
Anyway someone told me that having a friend who gets you is an awesome thing. I hope you are going to see a friend who "gets you".
Texasmouth
Footballguy
I havent been on here in a few years. I used to be on here daily...the site not this topic specifically...tonight I just remembered it was here and it seems like a good place to check back into on a night like tonight. I think I am basically having a little pitty party for myself. I am retired from the military now. I have been working part time at my daughters school for the last five years mainly to be on her same schedule. She is our only child. My wife was told she couldnt have kids so our daughter was kind of like a miracle. We are extremely close. My relationship with my wife has had ups and downs over the past 20+ years but my daughter has been a source of love and strength in both of our lives. Tonight is her last night in the house. She is leaving for college tomorrow...and when I say leaving....she isnt heading off to England or anything, she will be in our town. I have been excited for her. I knew I was going to have a hard time with her leaving and tonight is that night. It all hit me like a ton of bricks. I am a pretend tough guy, I could probably count on one hand the number of times I have allowed myself to cry in the last decade but tonight just knocked me down. I was overwhelmed and I just broke into tears. Something really small, just thinking about how my life has just changed drastically. We have little routines in our house that are never going to be the same again. Walking our dog together. The dog sneaks upstairs and gets in bed with my wife and I and my daughter always comes upstairs to tell us goodnight and grabs the dog. Tonight the dog stayed down with her and we didnt have the last time of that ritual. Im just sad and I am not good at dealing with that. It is tough. Tomorrow I am dropping her off at the dorms to start her new phase of life and I am already dreading coming home that first time and it is going to be quiet and lonely. I am really trying to put on a good face because I dont want her to feel bad but I am really down. I know this is the time I should reconnect with my wife and try to find some quality of life in other places but it is hard to let go. I think a lot of things kind of caught me off guard this week, her moving on and me maybe missing the military environment. I really feel like my entire identity has been being her dad and being in the military and those two parts of my life are really different now. I know this will pass but I dont want that new normal. I am not ready.
Long Ball Larry
Footballguy
Very rough transition, I’m sure. Have you expressed these feelings to your wife? I know what it’s like to have the feelings when it’s time to reconnect but not having the energy or maybe the internal desire. Just try to stay in touch with your feelings and not suppress and hopefully talk to your wife About it when you are ready. I’m sure you are apprehensive, but at the end of the day, more communication is going to be better. Good luck.
Angry Beavers
Footballguy
Been there @Texasmouth and it is not easy. Try to think of the great times that you had together, maybe go through old pictures, make a memory box, and embrace the next chapter of the your relationship. My son and I are very close. I was his rock for years in a number of ways, and he was mine. He and I made a memory box of mostly stuff from sporting events we went together or he played in with me as his coach etc. He lives a couple hours away and we do not talk everyday but that does not mean we still aren't very close. Hope this helps.
Angry Beavers
Footballguy
Update - I did see a friend that gets me and a couple of days away was much needed. The bigger news was that I got a job offer through one of my industry contacts - the whole position developed in about 72 hours from start to finish and as a result of a couple of conversations I have a great opportunity starting September 1st. Amazing how feeling like you aren't going to start running through your kids college savings to survive helps your mental state of mind. I have a ways to go to be sure, but a big load is off my mind to be certain. Thanks @prosopis and others that commented for the positive thoughts. Hope you are doing OK adjusting to the new normal with your daughter being at school. ( and then wait for Covid to take over and they move back home and it becomes an adjustment all over again
)
prosopis
Arizona Chupacabra
I feel your pain, literally. I moved my daughter into her dorm 6 days ago. I have four kids and she is my third to leave. Parents aren't supposed to have a favorite but..........
Anyway I do empathize with what you are going through. The good news is she is still in town. With some time you will find new routines of seeing her and listening to her tales of entering adulthood. You will be scared, proud and sad all at the same time. Yayyyyyyy kids!!!!!!!!
My daughter is still in the state. It is about 1hr 45 min drive from our house to her dorm. Tomorrow I head up there for the third time this week.
( it is regularly well over 100 degrees every day so always hoping the car doesn't explode)Hang in there Texas and watch as you find that all those years of raising her was worth it. It is a different stage of life for sure. Jump in with both feet, you find it rewarding.
Ministry of Pain
Footballguy
This is a good post for me to express how I have been feeling the last few weeks, actually longer but I was fooling or tricking myself into thinking everything was A-Ok and it surely isn't.
Luckily I have been doing a lot of exercise during the CV-19, I posted about it in March-Apr-May in Otis thread, kind of back pedaled a bit in July and so far in August including a lot of drinking, both beer and liquor and we're talking 10am, Noon, 2:30 in the afternoon, pretty much whenever we decide we want to have one which becomes more. Mrs has followed me down a similar path and that's been really hard to handle for me.
I should not be depressed but depression isn't all about having things or not having things, in fact many times a big item like a new OLED TV doesn't do much to really cheer you up once you buy it...and I'm spitballing because I don't own one of those. But i did something similar with a new receiver and speakers, didn't change the mood all that much. Again, Mrs and I have also been not getting along unless I just keep my mouth shut and we are both WFH, it's like being in the office all the time.
I haven't watched the news in weeks, seriously it just depresses me, ALL OF IT...from ABC to FOX to ESPN to CNN to ALL OF IT, anything that runs commercials. I highly suggest folks unplug and if possible take a little break from even in here for a few days. Just get off the computer and try to get some fresh air, good time to evaluate your health and what you are putting into your system, many times we bring about our own problems and I'm mostly talking about myself here.
I'm sorry AB you are feeling this low. I hope you can pull yourself up and find a way to navigate.
Ministry of Pain
Footballguy
. 
. With you all the way on this.ProstheticRGK
Footballguy
Thanks a lot, Dad.I feel your pain, literally. I moved my daughter into her dorm 6 days ago. I have four kids and she is my third to leave. Parents aren't supposed to have a favorite but..........
Anyway I do empathize with what you are going through. The good news is she is still in town. With some time you will find new routines of seeing her and listening to her tales of entering adulthood. You will be scared, proud and sad all at the same time. Yayyyyyyy kids!!!!!!!!
My daughter is still in the state. It is about 1hr 45 min drive from our house to her dorm. Tomorrow I head up there for the third time this week.
Hang in there Texas and watch as you find that all those years of raising her was worth it. It is a different stage of life for sure. Jump in with both feet, you find it rewarding.
prosopis
Arizona Chupacabra
I know, it's something I begrudgingly admit on the innernets but keep to myself in real life.Thanks a lot, Dad.
ProstheticRGK
Footballguy
All in good fun, brother. Reading that it just struck me as a funny scenario if one of your other kids had an account on here and read that.
Angry Beavers
Footballguy
Same to you - WFH with the spouse can clearly be a stressor - I have the same situation. There are days it is ok, and other days she drives me crazy...... I am sure she feels the same way.
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