Hang in there. My bff who is like a sis to me is approaching the 1 year anniversary since her sis's passing from cancer. It took months for her not to be so sad all the time. She's doing better now but there are days and reminders for both of us really. What's really helped her is her 1:1 with a grief counselor and going to a grief group which she wouldn't go without me. Also get out to take your mind off things. Force yourself out of the house and the routine that reminds you of her. It's baby steps/ 1 day at a time for sure, but it does get better. xxIt's been 12 weeks since my wife passed. Doing about as well as can be expected. Learning to live on my own, really for the first time ever. Still trying to find my way. My son seems to be doing well. He's back at school with his friends.
I feel like I'm in limbo between respecting the relationship I had with my wife and moving on with my own life. I guess that means I'm not ready to move on yet. Taking it one day at a time.
Thanks for listening and letting me ramble.
Keeping as busy as I can.Hang in there. My bff who is like a sis to me is approaching the 1 year anniversary since her sis's passing from cancer. It took months for her not to be so sad all the time. She's doing better now but there are days and reminders for both of us really. What's really helped her is her 1:1 with a grief counselor and going to a grief group which she wouldn't go without me. Also get out to take your mind off things. Force yourself out of the house and the routine that reminds you of her. It's baby steps/ 1 day at a time for sure, but it does get better. xx
I'm glad you posted an update, cheesey. I've thought of you and sent you my best wishes for healing and peace.Wow. Your wife sure chose her friends and her husband wisely and well. I wish I could have known her.
It's great to hear from you and I'm glad that you and your son are making the best out of things. I think you guys have both shown amazing strength and courage dealing with what you guys have gone through. I really respect and admire the both of you. Don't ever consider what you are doing "rambling". Although it always doesn't seem like it--everybody that posts in the FBG is like a family. I assure you that there is not a single person in here that doesn't want hear about how you and your son are doing. In fact--I personally would love if you'd post updates even more often. Wishing you and your son the best.It's been 12 weeks since my wife passed. Doing about as well as can be expected. Learning to live on my own, really for the first time ever. Still trying to find my way. My son seems to be doing well. He's back at school with his friends.
I feel like I'm in limbo between respecting the relationship I had with my wife and moving on with my own life. I guess that means I'm not ready to move on yet. Taking it one day at a time.
Thanks for listening and letting me ramble.
You're not rambling, although I bet it feels that way. My dad died a year ago, and I had to become my mother's legal guardian. That plus the legal issues just made me feel somewhat distracted pretty much all the time. It's just harder to feel really sharp and with it. That part does get better over time.Thanks for listening and letting me ramble.
this.You can always post his strikes and gutter balls here, we'll listen
You're probably correct. I think it's more a function of being bored and just messing around online.Hang in there, brother.
I know you aren't asking for advice and I also know everyone's different, but I might a little bit about dipping my toe into the dating scene just yet. Maybe get the holidays behind me first? I do think joining a group for whatever interests you have (reading, cooking, making beer, etc....) might help with some of your non-kid time, though.
Just some thoughts
Thank you. Sorry for your loss. It's never easy.I didn't see this the first time around and I'm very sorry for your loss. We went through pretty much the same thing with my MIL six years ago. She finally got the score she needed for the transplant at Yale and everything looked like it was gonna work out. A couple of hours into the surgery her pancreas failed and she passed. My wife will never be the same. Good luck with easing back in. I hope you find peace.
It's not unusual to not do much during the work week. By the time you get done working, wtf wants to go out? I want to chill out. Now if the loneliness is the issue, that's a different story, but there isn't nothing wrong with being an urban hermit m-f. If anything maybe hit up a gym a few days a week after work.Weekdays are still a mess. Once I get home from work I usually don't go back out. Going to try and start trying to find things to do. I realize I need to but the desire just isn't there yet. Baby steps, but progress none the less.
Cheeseypoof.
Agreed. Hang in GB cheeseI'm glad you sound to be doing well. Date or don't. Whatever feels good to you, you should do.
okcupid.com is a good one for free to flip through the profiles. hang in there man.You're all probably correct on the dating thing. It's more of a flirtation. I signed up for the free account. I just flip through the profiles that pop up. Haven't contacted anybody. Not sure I will, it's just a curiosity to me right now. Uncharted waters for me for sure. Making my way through a thick fog with no instruments and waiting to pop out the other side.
If any of the gals willie puts you onto ask you to do the Oklahoma Thanksgiving, don't get nervous. It's the same damn thanksgiving everybody else has - willie's people think theirs is somehow special. Humor them. One foot in front of the other, feel the love inside the pain, go Cubs.okcupid.com is a good one for free to flip through the profiles. hang in there man.
Just him. He does a lot of youth/junior tournaments on the weekends. I did bowl but stopped. Had an ankle/knee issue. Probably okay to get back at it. He's got a couple more years bowling youth so I'm/we're focusing on that right now.Are you in a bowling league or is it just your son?
They are a great way to meet people and the mixed leagues are more of a "fun" theme compared to the more competitive mens leagues.
Sounds like you are doing it right. Just take your time and do whatever you are comfortable with. The iDating thread has some good tips on building your profile. You might have already read through. The emptiness will never completely go away and you will think about her everyday, just a little less frequently as time passes. Just keep doing what you are doing. Focus on your son and slowly fill the gaps when he is not there.You're all probably correct on the dating thing. It's more of a flirtation. I signed up for the free account. I just flip through the profiles that pop up. Haven't contacted anybody. Not sure I will, it's just a curiosity to me right now. Uncharted waters for me for sure. Making my way through a thick fog with no instruments and waiting to pop out the other side.
That was quite the game last night. An emotional roller coaster on many levels. Congrats to the Chicago Cubs. World Series Champions!On a side note. She was a Chicago Cubs fan. So I like to think she is pulling some heavenly strings to bring a World Series Championship home to the north side of the Windy City. Go Cubs Go! Fly the W!
Barely getting through the day myself. It's kind of different for me because we never built any thanksgiving memories with Riley but it's still so hard. Today is actually 3 months since she's gone.Tomorrow with be 5 months since she passed. Anticipated the holidays would be tough and to that end my son and I looked for different things to do other than the same holiday traditions. Today we are going to my cousins house for dinner with my family, rather than the normal thanksgiving dinner with her family. Christmas will be something similar.
Even though I thought it would be hard spending my favorite holiday without my wife for the first time since 1990, I was not ready for the emotions that welled up this morning. Woke up this morning and the emotions took over. I was a wreck for about an hour. Now I'm just kind of melancholy. Think I'll be ok once I get to my cousins house and not hanging at home.
I agree with Kutta. Your honesty going through very tough life situations have been helpful for so many people. I know you are thankful for the time you had with your loved ones, even if way too brief. Take care.Shady and Cheesey, thank you both for sharing your journeys with us. You've both opened our eyes to what is truly important in life, and what better way to recognize that than on Thanksgiving. Thank you both.