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Unexpected Roommates II (1 Viewer)

Wrigley

Footballguy
Original thread

Old pic of SIL....I'll post a new one soon

Where to start?    SIL hasn't changed her spots, still smokes like a chimney, and drinks like a fish.   Surprisingly shes been able to hold down a bar-tending gig at a local cantena, but has little to no motivation do much of anything else.  Free drinks and food 

But this story isn't about her anymore, it's about her 18 year old son who is kind of following in his mothers footsteps......we'll call him Logan

Logan graduated from High School last fall by the skin of his teeth.  He's not much of a student, but he is very intelligent.   Originally after graduation, my wife and I were going to allow him to move in with us to attend the local community college.   The one stipulation being that he'd have to attend classes, and or find a job(he never moved in)

He, like his mother, has no motivation.  He would rather spend his days/nights playing video games and sleeping all day(who wouldn't)    When asked what he wants to do, he responds with "I don't know, maybe fire rescue"    I'm all for being supportive, but he's made no attempt at following up.   In fact, when asked about how one goes about getting a job as a fireman, he has no clue.   No clue as to even where the local firehouse is.   Wife and I are friends with several fireman that would be willing to take him under their wing, helping him get his foot in the door.   When confronted,  Logan just shrugs, and says he's not sure what he wants to do.  WTF?  Guess he's waiting for a lightning bolt 

Logan has had a pretty rough life, his mother left his father(abusive) when he was only a little kid...and dad never came around, or paid any child support.    He's been pretty timid his whole life, not many friends, and definitively not any girlfriends. ......that is until recently.   His Aunt and I have been monitoring his social media accounts in an attempt to get his fathers work information(as his dad owes SIL over $80K in back child support)  While looking over his FB, we've learned that Logan has himself a little girl friend.   At first I was happy for him, because all 18 year olds need some lovin.   One problem.....SHE IS ONLY 15  and they are doing the diddy    I've reached out to him about his new friend, and was told it's none of my business......and he's right, it's not.   But I still don't want to see my nephew get into an trouble. 

SIL is worried about him......I am too

Whats a Wrigley to do?

 
She looks weathered.  That’s a tough call for you.  I would confront him about it and tell him to end it or become somebody else’s girlfriend in jail.  

 
Original thread

Old pic of SIL....I'll post a new one soon

Where to start?    SIL hasn't changed her spots, still smokes like a chimney, and drinks like a fish.   Surprisingly shes been able to hold down a bar-tending gig at a local cantena, but has little to no motivation do much of anything else.  Free drinks and food 

But this story isn't about her anymore, it's about her 18 year old son who is kind of following in his mothers footsteps......we'll call him Logan

Logan graduated from High School last fall by the skin of his teeth.  He's not much of a student, but he is very intelligent.   Originally after graduation, my wife and I were going to allow him to move in with us to attend the local community college.   The one stipulation being that he'd have to attend classes, and or find a job(he never moved in)

He, like his mother, has no motivation.  He would rather spend his days/nights playing video games and sleeping all day(who wouldn't)    When asked what he wants to do, he responds with "I don't know, maybe fire rescue"    I'm all for being supportive, but he's made no attempt at following up.   In fact, when asked about how one goes about getting a job as a fireman, he has no clue.   No clue as to even where the local firehouse is.   Wife and I are friends with several fireman that would be willing to take him under their wing, helping him get his foot in the door.   When confronted,  Logan just shrugs, and says he's not sure what he wants to do.  WTF?  Guess he's waiting for a lightning bolt 

Logan has had a pretty rough life, his mother left his father(abusive) when he was only a little kid...and dad never came around, or paid any child support.    He's been pretty timid his whole life, not many friends, and definitively not any girlfriends. ......that is until recently.   His Aunt and I have been monitoring his social media accounts in an attempt to get his fathers work information(as his dad owes SIL over $80K in back child support)  While looking over his FB, we've learned that Logan has himself a little girl friend.   At first I was happy for him, because all 18 year olds need some lovin.   One problem.....SHE IS ONLY 15  and they are doing the diddy    I've reached out to him about his new friend, and was told it's none of my business......and he's right, it's not.   But I still don't want to see my nephew get into an trouble. 

SIL is worried about him......I am too

Whats a Wrigley to do?
Wish I could unsee that new pic  :kicksrock:

Also tell him to wear a rubber

 
I think you need a united front with Logan - you, the wife, and SIL would have to all explain to him that he needs to start doing something with his life and address the girlfriend situation.  If he sees a weak link in the chain, such as the SIL, not caring about what he does, I think he's just gonna keep floating through life without a care until something happens that makes him care (pregnancy, bills to pay but no job, etc).  The SIL needs to play a role in getting her son to turn his life around, you can help with that but not do it yourself. 

 
What is state law on a 18 year old dating a 15 year old?

I’d let him know the danger he is in from a Legal standpoint and move on. Regarding the other issues, no conversations are going to dent the years of apathy he has under his belt.

 
What is state law on a 18 year old dating a 15 year old?

I’d let him know the danger he is in from a Legal standpoint and move on. Regarding the other issues, no conversations are going to dent the years of apathy he has under his belt.
R Kelly's been piping under-aged girls in this state for at least 25 years without ramifications, so I'm sure he'll be fine. 

 
The endgame will be one of the following:

1. Logan breaks up with the 15-year-old. The 15-year-old calls the police as revenge. Logan goes to jail.

2. The parents of the 15-year-old find out about their relationship and call the police. Logan goes to jail.

3. The 15-year-old gets pregnant. Logan does not go to jail but probably wishes that he did.

 
The endgame will be one of the following:

1. Logan breaks up with the 15-year-old. The 15-year-old calls the police as revenge. Logan goes to jail.

2. The parents of the 15-year-old find out about their relationship and call the police. Logan goes to jail.

3. The 15-year-old gets pregnant. Logan does not go to jail but probably wishes that he did.
And don't twins run somewhere in the family?  If so, he'd wish for something stronger than jail.....

Not that I know anything about that.

 
Joe Summer said:
The endgame will be one of the following:

1. Logan breaks up with the 15-year-old. The 15-year-old calls the police as revenge. Logan goes to jail.

2. The parents of the 15-year-old find out about their relationship and call the police. Logan goes to jail.

3. The 15-year-old gets pregnant. Logan does not go to jail but probably wishes that he did.
Her mom dropped her off at their house

 
While her face looks weathered I give the broad credit for maintaining a decent figure with all that beer drinking. 
Agreed. Plus the first pic she looks to be in a wedding, more than likely had her hair and makeup done by someone who knows what they are doing.   The other pic she probably just rolled out of bed a half hour earlier.

 
Okay, so the consensus is talk him.

Going to be tough going, it looks like he's in the "love" stage of having the sex for the first time. 

This girl looks like trash, not in a good way(No I won't post pictures).....she's already a sex pro at 15

 
And don't twins run somewhere in the family?  If so, he'd wish for something stronger than jail.....

Not that I know anything about that.
Twins can only be passed down by a female (two eggs getting released).  A father could pass it to his daughter, but it would skip a generation.  Signed, Dad of fraternal twins.

 
Okay, so the consensus is talk him.

Going to be tough going, it looks like he's in the "love" stage of having the sex for the first time. 

This girl looks like trash, not in a good way(No I won't post pictures).....she's already a sex pro at 15
SIL protégé?

 
Don't forget Wrigley, he loves her more than anyone likely right now.  Make sure you don't talk poorly about her in any way, otherwise you are sure to lose any chance of buy in.
Agree - talk badly about her, and you lose him 100%.

That said, he probably has almost no chance at buy in anyway. His age (18), combined with his experience level (zero),  means she is *everything* to him. Even if you have the responsibility / birth control talk, all it would take is for her to say "don't use it", and that's that. Right now, she has immense power over him, and the only way it breaks is when he gets another girlfriend or two and realizes "oh wait... there are a lot of these out there". 

 
While looking over his FB, we've learned that Logan has himself a little girl friend.   At first I was happy for him, because all 18 year olds need some lovin.   One problem.....SHE IS ONLY 15  and they are doing the diddy   
Maybe just tell him to take all of this off of social media at least until she turns 16?

 
Wife and I have identical twins. 
Identical twins (splitting of one fertilized egg) are genetic anomalies and not passed down

Fraternal twins (or multiples) are different eggs fertilized by different sperm.  Essentially siblings born at the same time.

 
Last edited by a moderator:
Agree - talk badly about her, and you lose him 100%.

That said, he probably has almost no chance at buy in anyway. His age (18), combined with his experience level (zero),  means she is *everything* to him. Even if you have the responsibility / birth control talk, all it would take is for her to say "don't use it", and that's that. Right now, she has immense power over him, and the only way it breaks is when he gets another girlfriend or two and realizes "oh wait... there are a lot of these out there"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bnlv1wd13fY

 
I remember that original pic of her from back in the day.

She was smokin' in that pic.

It might just have been the perfect angle and everything, but wow.

And in all honesty, she's actually aged a little better than I would have expected.

 
One step forward, two steps back 

SIL didn’t have her lease renewed(has known for the past 4 months) and of course waited until the police were at the door to do anything about it 

now her high school aged son and and daughter have moved in with friends to make it through the school year, she has moved in with a friend, leaving the grandmother and oldest son homeless 

Now the oldest son is basically begging us to allow him to move in with us until he can find somewhere to live(no job)

Problem I have is that we once upon a time invited him to move in with us, with a couple stimulations, one either he has a job,  or two be enrolled at the local community college(this was 2 years ago)  Zippo, in two years since high school 

house is all filled up 

Ugh

 
Now the oldest son is basically begging us to allow him to move in with us until he can find somewhere to live(no job)

Problem I have is that we once upon a time invited him to move in with us, with a couple stimulations, one either he has a job,  or two be enrolled at the local community college(this was 2 years ago)  Zippo, in two years since high school 
what has he been doing for the last year? 

 

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