What's new
Fantasy Football - Footballguys Forums

Welcome to Our Forums. Once you've registered and logged in, you're primed to talk football, among other topics, with the sharpest and most experienced fantasy players on the internet.

At the ER, ask me anything (1 Viewer)

FINE — Freaked, Insecure, Neurotic, and Emotional. 

FINE — ####ed, Insecure, Neurotic & Emotional.
 

I’m good but my finger is FUBAR

 
Lets talk Lions football

How many games in before we abandon the Patriots Cloning Experiment?

If you were owner of the Lions what would you do to establish a winning franchise?

Or is just not having a Ford the owner the answer?

 
Hospital has a scan thingy to take your temp before you can enter

You have to align your eyeballs with two circles 

Great idea but the video display lags several seconds 

Legit took a full minute 

 
Moonlight said:
Lets talk Lions football

How many games in before we abandon the Patriots Cloning Experiment?

If you were owner of the Lions what would you do to establish a winning franchise?

Or is just not having a Ford the owner the answer?
Click to expand...
1) The Red Wings fired a coach who was 2-0 (about 1/40th of the season), the Tigers fired Phil Garner after 6 games (1/27th.) Based on those precedents, this week or Monday sounds about right. Start ALL your Packers this week.

2) First, I would trade Stafford because he’s a good man & deserves a chance at a ring before he retires in 6-8 years. Second, I would pay Oklahoma the $5M buyout and give Lincoln Riley a 6-year, $60 million contract and full autonomy as GM & HC. Third, I would hire Tony Robbins to coach everyone in the organization on positivity and through neurolinguistic programming make sure everyone believes they can be winners. Fourth, I would give Megatron back the $1M and make sure alumni were part of building the new culture. Fifth, I’d demolish Ford Field and use the harsh climate as a true home field advantage. #### domes.

3) In this scenario, let’s pretend I’m a lost heir and claimed my rightful place as the HMFIC. Rule number one is the Fords can never leave Grosse Pointe Shores until we make the Super Bowl. Don’t come to practice or games and def don’t drunk text me at 2am with advice.

 
Last edited by a moderator:
Male nurse and old Veteran guy patient are arguing over who is more corrupt, Nixon or Trump?

Quoting Old Vet: “I heard it on MSNBC”

I didn’t hear the first part so out of context but still you get the idea. Male nurse is a black guy, trying to stay neutral.

 
They put a long gauze sleeve over my arm before they took my BP

That’s been the most exciting development since my battle with the iris scan

OK I’m up to bat ttyl

 
the (youngish) doctor just gave me a local

jabbed me like 6 times & man did it freaking hurt 

I pulled my finger off the bone 9/18/1980, I remember two shots at the base was plenty

this mFer is treating me like a pin cushion 

as he is finishing up I notice his hospital ID BADGE

right under his name it says

EXPIRES 2/2017

should I be concerned??

 
Last edited by a moderator:
doctor is AA & young I’m old n white 

open to any Shick

I’ll never see him again

 
Last edited by a moderator:
I told him in a slow voice his parents must be very proud of him

he is still staring at me over the top of his glasses 

 
no more jokes that smarted

blood everywhere 

speaking of which, has anyone binged “What We Do In The Shadows” on Hulu?

 
BobbyLayne said:
the (youngish) doctor just gave me a local

jabbed me like 6 times & man did it freaking hurt 

I pulled my finger off the bone 9/18/1980, I remember two shots at the base was plenty

this mFer is treating me like a pun cushion 

as he is finishing up I notice his hospital ID BADGE

right under his name it says

EXPIRES 2/2017

should I be concerned??
Click to expand...
Don’t worry, with Covid they’re extending licenses. I’m sure it’s fine...

 
tri-man 47 said:
BobbyLayne said:
I asked for her number & she said 115 over 80
Click to expand...
Ooh, so she's a clever little minx, too. 
Click to expand...
When she gave me my discharge papers she pointed out which day I was to return to get the stitches out

<pause>

”I’m working 3-11 that day if you want to come in then.”

So...guess you could say it’s getting pretty serious.

 
Last edited by a moderator:
What did you do you to your finger?  I once cut my flexor tendon on some glass and had to get surgery and also nearly sliced off the tip of the same finger with a vegetable peeler and required stitches

 
Long Ball Larry said:
What did you do you to your finger?  I once cut my flexor tendon on some glass and had to get surgery and also nearly sliced off the tip of the same finger with a vegetable peeler and required stitches
Click to expand...
I don’t have my apple corer with me (in storage, staying at a hotel for a few more weeks.) While on a Zoom call with a bunch of people I jabbed a steak knife in - I only have about 3 knives at the Residence Inn - it felt crooked, so I picked it up & flipped it over. Instead of putting it back down on the cutting board I tried to just yank it out.

Mind you I’m in the middle of making a point on the call, not paying attention, and I’m not even sure how exactly I was gripping the apple. It didn’t want to come out easy so I probably shifted my grip slightly and yanked it out. I could feel the teeth of the serrated knife tearing through the flesh.

Everyone saw this, bunch of shrieks & yelling. I was bent over holding it for awhile & when someone asked if I was OK I said nope & ran to the bathroom. After running it under water for 20-30 seconds I realized the water in the sink was Kool Aid red & there were drips, drops & splatters everywhere. Put a soaking wash cloth kinda tight around it, wrapped a hand towel over that, then wrapped a full bath towel over the gore arm.

”Aight Imma head out now.”

Ridiculously stupid. Haven’t had stitches since 1989.

 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Similar threads

DJackson10
Got hurt after I left work 3 weeks ago and my employer is giving me a hard time since the issue
2 3
Replies
101
Views
3K
DJackson10
DJackson10
KGB
SO, The Sons of Anarchy moved in next door
Replies
20
Views
557
Runkle
Runkle
ChiefD
Sitting At Jiffy Lube - Ask Me About Lubricants
2
Replies
60
Views
859
ChiefD
ChiefD

Users who are viewing this thread

Total: 2 (members: 0, guests: 2)
Top